Picking Up the Pieces
by Lillehafrue
Summary: After the events in Demons, the Tracy family has been torn apart. Can they ever put it all back together again? And what will happen to International Rescue if they don't?
1. Chapter 1

New month, new story! Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed for "Demons". I hope you like this one just as much.

I don't own Thunderbirds or its characters, just the ones I invented. Please do not archive without my permission.

* * *

John Tracy stood on the wharf, idly throwing french fries to the gulls. It was a beautiful June day in Boston. The temps were in the low seventies and a cool breeze blew in from across the harbor. He tossed the last of his fries in the air and walked back down the street. He paused for a few minutes to watch the sea lions outside the Aquarium. They jumped up and down, welcoming the attention from the tourists.

John smiled at their antics-both the tourists' and the sea lions'-and headed back home. He decided to avoid Faneuil Hall, since school had gotten out last week and the place was packed. His chest had begun to ache so he decided to hail a cab and was soon back at the Tracy brownstone on Beacon Hill.

Once inside, he poured himself a glass of water and hunted around for some pain killers. Virgil had taken the heavy duty drugs away back on the island, and since then John had had to make do with over the counter medicines. _Thought I was trying to kill myself. As if. Did he really think nightmares would make me contemplate suicide? Try spending two months alone in space with no human contact. If that didn't push me over the edge, a few bad dreams certainly wouldn't._ He swallowed the pills quickly, and grabbing a book, made his way up to the roof patio. He pulled off his shirt and lay down in a lounge chair to soak up the sun.

It had been a little over three weeks since the Hood had been taken into custody, and eight days since John had left the island the Tracy family called home. He'd first gone to the family's farm in Kansas, but after two days of staring at the cornfields, he could have sworn he heard voices. So he hopped a plane in Wichita and ended up in Boston instead. He hadn't told his family of the change in plans, but had no doubt his father knew. John glanced down at the communicator strapped to his wrist. _Anyway, it's a damn good watch._

He stretched his arms over his head, wincing as his ribs protested. They weren't healing as fast as he'd hoped, but that was partially his fault. He was supposed to be lying low and resting, but this was the longest he'd spent down on Earth in a long, long time.

He tossed the book to the table next to him and closed his eyes. Before long, he was sound asleep.

* * *

Jeff looked up as Scott shuffled into the kitchen. Scott was normally the first one down, but his eldest was unusually late for breakfast this morning. He watched as Scott poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table. There were dark circles under his eyes and he moved stiffly. His right arm was still immobilized by a sling.

"Morning." Jeff called out.

"Morning." Scott grumbled back. He reached for a muffin from the basket in front of him and tried to butter it, no mean feat one handed.

Jeff took the muffin and buttered it then handed it back to his son. Scott nodded his thanks. "You're down late this morning. Bad night?" Jeff asked a few minutes later.

"Yeah."

"You still having alot of pain?"

Scott nodded. "Seems this should be feeling better not worse by now. I'm going to have Virgil take a look at it later. When does Steve get back?"

"Not for a couple more weeks. He wanted to give a decent notice at the hospital, then he has to pack up his apartment." Jeff looked closely at his son. "Want me to take you to a hospital on the mainland?"

Scott smiled thinly and shook his head. "No thanks Dad. It's probably nothing. I'm just used to being more active. This sitting around is starting to drive me crazy."

"I can understand that." Jeff buttered a muffin for himself. "I'm taking Virgil and Alan up to Thunderbird 5 today. Brains has the life-support systems back online. I want to assess the rest of the damage first hand."

Scott looked up, surprised. "You're taking Alan?"

Jeff nodded. "It'll be good for him. Plus, I think he and Gordon need a break from each other."

"I agree." Scott leaned back in his chair, wincing as he did so. Gordon and Alan had stopped screaming at each other and had now taken to ignoring one another instead. This got especially annoying at mealtimes. "They'd better not start something while we're monitoring you." Scott said warningly.

"I'll have a talk with both of them before we leave." Jeff got up and put his mug in the sink. He looked over at Scott, who was lightly massaging his right shoulder. "Go see Virgil." He ordered.

Scott smiled. "FAB Dad."

A few hours later, Scott watched as Thunderbird roared up from her silo under the library. A faint twinge of jealousy coursed through him, as he watched the rocket disappear into the atmosphere. He sighed, feeling useless. The last time he'd been grounded this long was back in the Air Force, when his jet had been shot down. That had been a long month of medical and psychological tests until he had been cleared to fly again.

A figure on the beach caught his attention. _At least I'm not Gordon. That's **his** baby that took off without him._ Gordon had said some pretty nasty things to John a week ago. While Scott knew that wasn't the main reason John had decided to leave, it certainly didn't help. And poor Gordon was feeling the brunt of it from his other brothers. He and Alan had always been partners in crime, and now the two weren't even on speaking terms. Virgil wasn't exactly ignoring Gordon, but wasn't being overly friendly either. _And as for me, well, I can't be mad at the little twerp. He was the only one with the guts enough to confront John and make him take a good long look at himself. _Scott watched his brother until Gordon had vanished along the beach, then sighed again and went inside to find Brains.

* * *

Jeff stood with his hands on his hips, and surveyed the bridge of Thunderbird 5. Most of the computer monitors were black, and the whole place smelled of scorched ozone.

Virgil popped his head up from the panel on the floor. "Doesn't look too bad Dad. Better than last time anyway. Alan bring me the new transponder." He disappeared under the floor again.

"FAB Virgil." Jeff turned to his youngest. "Alan?"

Alan stood staring out the view port, not hearing his father or brother. Jeff followed his gaze. The sun was rising on the far side of the Earth, and the planet seemed to glow with Earthshine. Millions of stars twinkled behind it in the black velvet of space. "Beautiful isn't it?" Jeff asked quietly.

"This is what John sees everyday?" Alan shook his head in awe. "Wow." He breathed.

Jeff smiled. "Think you'd like it up here?"

Alan turned to his father. "What? Me!"

Jeff shrugged. "We're going to need to train someone since John is…" His voice trailed off.

"Do you really think John's not coming back Dad?" Alan asked.

"I don't know Alan. I just don't know." Jeff sighed.

"Hello up there! Still waiting for that transponder!"

Jeff and Alan turned together to see Virgil's arm waving at them from the floor panel. Alan quickly brought the part to his brother, and after a few minutes, the whole station came to life. Virgil popped up. "Are we online?"

Jeff walked over to the console. "Checking now. Thunderbird 5 to Tracy Island."

"_We hear you Thunderbird 5. How's it going Dad?"_ Scott peered out at them from the viewscreen.

"Looking good. Virgil got the transponder installed. Damage doesn't look as bad as the last time. Give it another week and we should have her up and running."

Virgil came over to peer down at his brother. "Finally doing something useful down there, huh flyboy." He grinned.

"_Yeah, I'm here in my shorts drinking ice cold lemonade, snacking on brownies. What are you having for lunch Mozart?"_ Scott retorted.

Virgil turned green. "You suck." He scowled and walked away. "C'mon Sprout, let me show you what I did." He led Alan down to the floor.

Jeff shook his head. "Sometimes I just don't know where the lot of you came from."

"_We keep you young Dad."_

"Yeah, that's it." Jeff looked over to the computer console. "Brains, how's she looking to you?"

"_E-E-Everything seems to be working. There is minor s-s-structural damage to the outer ring and the communications array. You're only able to talk to us here on the i-i-island."_

Jeff frowned. "We'll have to work on that next. What about—" He was cut off as the station gave a groan and all power went dead. "Virgil! What happened?"

He heard a muffled curse. "I don't know! Hold on."

Alan appeared at Jeff's side. "Dad, I didn't touch anything, I swear." His blue eyes were wide with fear.

Jeff placed a comforting hand on his son's shoulder. "I know. It's OK Alan." He smiled.

More cursing was heard from beneath the floor. Alan raised one eyebrow up at his father in surprise. "I didn't think Virgil knew how to swear."

Jeff laughed. "Neither did I." They made their way over to the floor panel. "Virgil? Everything all right down there?"

"Does everything look all right to you Dad?" Came the reply. A moment later, an arm appeared and Jeff pulled his son up. "I have no idea why that happened. There must be a short somewhere."

"Can you track it down?" Jeff asked.

"In a few years, sure." Virgil sighed. "We could really use John's help."

Jeff shook his head. "Give him time. He only just got to Boston a few days ago."

Alan looked up in surprise. "I thought he went to Kansas?"

"He changed his mind and is in Boston. He's staying at the brownstone."

"You heard from him?" Virgil asked. "How's he feeling?"

"No, he hasn't called." Jeff blushed and looked away uncomfortably. "I tracked his communicator."

Virgil seemed nonplussed by the comment. "Good. Someone should be keeping an eye on him." He motioned Alan to help him replace the floor cover. "There's not much else we can do here Dad. Might was well call it a day."

Alan grinned slyly. "You just don't want to throw up again."

"Brat." Virgil made his way back down the airlock to Thunderbird 3.

Alan cast one more longing look out the window. "Dad? Are you coming? I don't want to clean up after Virgil again."

Jeff smiled. "You're right. Back to Thunderbird 3. Let your brother know we're on our way home."


	2. Chapter 2

Hope you're all enjoying this so far.Thanks to everyone who's reviewed!

I don't own Thunderbirds or it's characters, just the ones I made up. Please do not copy or archive this without my express written permission. This includes c2's. Thanks!

_

* * *

_

_Smoke filled the station and sparks flew everywhere. A few small fires burned in the corners. John dragged himself to the console, the pain in his head almost making him throw up._

"_Thunderbird 5 to Tracy Island! Come in Tracy Island!" There was no answer. "Dad! Scott! Someone answer me!" Sparks flew, and John flinched. _

_**They're not coming…**_

_John tried another set of channels. "This is Thunderbird 5, I've been hit! I need assistance!"_

_**You're all alone…**._

_John looked up as the computer began flashing wildly. **"LIFE SUPPORT FAILING."** He hurriedly punched in commands, to no avail. "I'm losing all power! Repeat I'm losing all power!"_

_**All alone…**_

John awoke with a start, for a moment, not knowing where he was. Breathing heavily, he looked around. _A dream, it was all a damned dream…_He glanced over at the clock. _5:30 am. Great, guess I might as well get up. _He got to his feet and pulled on a pair of shorts and an old MIT sweatshirt.

He made his way down to the kitchen and pouring a glass of juice, sat down at the table. The house was dark, and only the faint sounds of traffic could be heard from outside. Feeling claustrophobic from the aftereffects of the nightmare, John put his glass in the sink and hurried out the door.

He walked down the block until he reached the footbridge over Storrow Drive. He paused in the center of the bridge and looked around. Traffic was slow on a Saturday, and there were only a few joggers out this early.

"_You're alone John…"_

He shook his head to clear it. _Dammit! It was just a dream!_ He walked faster down the ramp towards the Esplanade, breaking into a jog when he reached the bottom. _I'm where I want to be. I'm alone by choice._ He jogged on for a few minutes until his chest started to protest._ This is **my** body, it does what **I** want it to do._ He pushed himself further until his vision began greying out at the edges and he couldn't catch his breath. Finally he came to a faltering stop and leaned, hunched over against a tree.

He stayed there, breathing heavily. His chest was afire with pain and his knees buckled. He crouched down, trying desperately to catch his breath.

"Are you alright?"

John looked up. There was a young woman watching him with concern. "Are you alright?" She asked again.

John nodded. "Y-Yes, th-thanks." He stood, a little too quickly and everything spun around him.

She grabbed his arm and eased him back to the ground. "Easy. Just relax." He felt her take his wrist in hers and knew she was taking his pulse. "Breathe in…out, slowly, that's it."

John's vision cleared enough to finally get a good look at her. She had creamy white skin, with deep indigo eyes. Her head was topped with a cap of short black hair. John smiled. "T-thanks."

She frowned. "What happened?"

He shook his head. "I was in an…accident a few weeks ago. Guess I just overdid it." He smiled ruefully.

"You think?" She helped him to his feet. John bit back a moan and his hand went automatically to his left side. "Let me see that." Before John could protest, she had pulled up his sweatshirt and ran her hands along his ribcage. When she gently pressed against his left side, he let out a hiss of pain. She looked up at him with narrowed eyes. "You have a broken rib."

John shook his head. "No actually, I have four."

Her eyes widened in disbelief. "Are you kidding me? Sit down now." She ordered as she helped him over to a bench and continued her examination. "This is a chest tube scar. Just what kind of accident were you in?" She demanded.

"Are you a doctor?" John asked, sidestepping her question.

"A nurse. I just got off from work and I usually take a walk before I head home. And you're changing the subject." She snapped.

"I was in a…plane crash." John answered. _Well, not exactly a plane, but close enough._

She ran her hands along his chest again. John caught her hand in his. "Don't." He smiled. "It tickles." She couldn't help it and laughed. John held out his hand. "I'm John."

"Christa. Nice to meet you. Do you live around here?"

"No, not really. My family has a brownstone in town, and I'm just staying here indefinitely." He replied. "You?"

"I have a place over on Park Drive."

John's eyes lit up. "Near the ballpark?"

She laughed. "You a Red Sox fan John?"

"Who isn't? Do **not** tell me you like the Yankees." He frowned at her.

"And risk being disowned by my family? I don't think so."

"That's something then." He looked out over the Charles. The fog was beginning to burn off and there were a few scullers out, _probably the Harvard team, _he thought to himself.

Christa took his wrist again. "John? I'd like you to come back to the hospital where I work. I think someone should take a look at you."

John shook his head. ""No, I'm fine. Really."

"I don't think you are. You're breathing and pulse aren't quite steady yet. How long ago were you in the crash?"

He shrugged. "About three weeks, give or take a few days."

"Three weeks? You had a chest tube only three weeks ago and you're out jogging! You idiot!" She pulled out a cell phone and started dialing.

"Who are you calling?" John asked.

"An ambulance. You could have internal bleeding." She replied.

In a flash, John was on his feet and pulled the phone from her hand. "No! No ambulance. I'm fine." His tone softened. "Look, I'll head home right now—I'll even take a cab. And I have a…friend who's a doctor over at Mass General. I'll give him a call. OK?"

"Who is it?"

"What?"

"Your friend? Who is it? I work at Mass Gen."

_Terrific. No way I can keep this to myself now._ John sighed. "Dr. Steve MacLeod."

"Mac? You're friends with Mac?" She laughed. "I'm his nurse."

"His nurse?"

"I'm head of his surgical team. Small world huh?" She laughed.

John failed to see the humor. "Yeah, isn't it." He muttered.

Her eyes took on a faraway look. "We'll miss him."

"Why?"

She turned back to him. "He took a job in the private sector. Some kind of research I think. Mac's being very mysterious about the whole thing. He leaves in about a week."

_So, Dad convinced him to sign on. Interesting…_ John sat back down, carefully trying not to wince and set her off again. "So, how long have you known Steve?"

"Mac? Sorry, that's what we all call him over at the hospital." She frowned thoughtfully for a moment. "I've been part of his surgical team for almost two years now."

John nodded. "He's a good guy to work for then?"

"The best." She eyed him curiously. "You should know that if you're friends."

John looked away. "I haven't know him that long actually." He turned back and smiled charmingly. "So, want to go get a cup of coffee or something?"

"I thought you were going home to rest?"

John shrugged. "I figured a cup of coffee was the least I could do to say thanks."

Christa arched an eyebrow at him. "Are you asking me out John?" He blushed to his hairline and stammered something. _He is cute, all that gorgeous blonde hair. The body's not too bad either, what I saw of it. And those eyes…_ "So, are you?"

"Am I what?"

"Asking me out?" She smiled impishly.

John groaned and put his head in his hands. "My brother is _so_ much better at this sort of thing." He muttered.

She pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket and scribbled something on it. "Here. Give me a call later and let me know how you're feeling. Then later we can have coffee or something, and you can tell me all about your brother."

He took the paper and smiled. "Brothers. I have four."

"Four again huh? Now I'm intrigued."

"I'm an intriguing sort of guy."

She laughed again. "I'll bet you are." She yawned. "I'm sorry, I really need to get home. And so do you. I'll be checking with Mac to see if you called him."

"Yes mom." John carefully got to his feet, and together they walked up the path. He realized for the first time, just how tiny she was, as she barely came up to his shoulders.

John had to stop twice and catch his breath, refusing each time to call an ambulance. Finally, they crossed over Storrow Drive again, and John waved to signal a cab. "I'll call you later." He told Christa, one hand absently rubbing his chest.

She watched him in concern. "Are you sure you're going to be able to get home alright?"

"I'll be fine." He replied.

She jabbed her finger into his arm. "If you haven't called Mac by lunchtime, I'm calling him for you."

"I said I'd call!"

"You'd better."

"I will!"

"Get some rest!" She waved as John got into the cab and drove away.

By the time he got back to the brownstone, John's head had begun to pound in time with the throbbing of his chest. Cursing to himself, he hunted for painkillers, and not finding any, he stormed into the living room to lie down. Spying the liquor cabinet in the corner, he opened it and pulled out a bottle. Eyeing it for a moment, he pulled off the cap and took a long swig. The whiskey burned pleasantly down his throat, so he grabbed a glass and sat down on the couch. Pouring himself another, he leaned back, and waited for the alcohol to dull the pain.

* * *

Jeff sat at his desk, his forehead furrowed in thought.

Scott walked in, a file in his good hand. "Hey Dad, Brains thinks he might know what's going on up on TB 5. He said—what's wrong?"

Jeff looked up, his face a mask of concern. "I just got off the phone with Steve."

Scott felt a chill wash over him. "John?"

Jeff nodded. "Steve got a call from a co-worker this morning. Seems she was out for a walk, when she ran into your brother, jogging."

"Jogging?" Scott sat down in a chair. "What the hell was he doing out jogging?"

Jeff shook his head. "I have no idea. He wasn't doing it too well either from what Steve said. Seems this girl found John half collapsed against a tree and tried to call an ambulance."

Scott had to repress a smile. "Bet that went over well."

Jeff nodded. "She helped him to a cab and told him to call a doctor. He said he would. Needless to say, he didn't so she called the doctor she works for, who happens to be Steve, and told him what happened."

"She works with Steve?"

"She—her name's Christa, is head of his surgical team. John mentioned knowing Steve and promised to call. Steve never heard from him and went over to the brownstone to have a look."

"And?" Scott asked when the silence had gone on too long.

Jeff sighed. "He found your brother passed out on the living room couch. Drunk. At ten o'clock in the morning."

"Dammit!" Scott exploded. He got to his feet and stalked across the room to stare out the window. He turned back to his father. "So now what do we do?"

"There's nothing we can do Scott."

"How can you say that! He's your son!" Scott yelled angrily.

Jeff narrowed his eyes at his son's tone. "I know that. And I know that if we push John on this, he's going to run again. And this time we might not find him."

Scott's shoulders slumped. "Dad…"

Jeff walked over to him and placed a comforting arm around his shoulders. "I know Scott, I know."


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks again to everyone who's read! And a special thanks goes to Sam 1 for helping me with Kyrano. Enjoy!

* * *

Gordon cut through the water in a powerful freestyle. He tapped the far end of the pool, took a breath and plunged back underwater in the opposite direction. After nearly fifteen minutes, he pulled himself up to the edge, and breathing heavily, looked around.

Alan had come out unnoticed, and now sat with his back to the pool, reading something. Kyrano was off to one side, tending to the plants. Gordon could hear the piano, which meant Virgil was awake, but a glance at Scott's window showed the shade still down. _Wow, Virg is up before Scotty. That's a first. His shoulder must be bothering him more than he wants to admit._

Gordon glanced at Alan again, but his youngest brother hadn't moved. Scowling, Gordon sank back under water, and surfaced, this time working on his butterfly stroke. He was halfway through his third lap when a cramp struck. He doubled over sharply, inhaling water, and sank to the bottom of the pool.

Alan had been watching Gordon out of the corner of his eye. He made a mental note when Gordon started swimming again, and wasn't concerned when he heard him stop. _He's either taking a break or if we're really lucky, he's drowned._ Alan glanced up. There were no footprints leading from the pool. With a chill, Alan looked down.

Gordon was lying at the bottom of the pool. He wasn't moving.

"**DAD!**" Alan hit the water at a run.

Kyrano dropped his rake and rushed to the side of the pool. Virgil appeared on his terrace. "What's going on?"

Kyrano pointed. "Master Gordon!"

Virgil disappeared from view and a few moments later, he came flying down the steps. "What happened?" He demanded.

Alan's head popped up in the water. "V-Virgil! Help me!" He was struggling as he tried to keep Gordon's head above the water. Virgil dove in and together he and Alan pulled Gordon to the edge of the pool. Kyrano grabbed him just as Jeff and Scott arrived. Jeff and Kyrano pulled Gordon up and laid him on the ground.

"He's not breathing!" Jeff called out.

Virgil shoved his father out of the way, and began working on his brother. He tilted Gordon's head back and listened for breath sounds, then began administering CPR. Finally Gordon started to cough and Virgil quickly rolled him on his left side.

Gordon's eyes fluttered open as he coughed up water. Virgil pounded his brother on the back. "Gordon! Say something!"

Gordon finally stopped coughing and peered up at Virgil. "I love you very much Virgil, but could you keep your tongue out of my mouth?" He grinned weakly.

Virgil glared at his brother, then broke out into a shaky laugh. "Gord…"

"What happened Gordon?" Jeff asked, kneeling down next to his son.

Gordon gave another cough, and sat up. "I-I got a cramp."

"You alright now?" Scott asked.

Gordon nodded and got to his feet. He bent double for a moment and took a deep breath before straightening. "Yeah, I'm OK." He looked around. "Where's Alan?"

They all turned. "He was here a minute ago." Scott said.

"He helped pull you out." Virgil looked around. "I'd better go find him."

Jeff put a hand on Virgil's arm. "No, leave him a bit. I'll go look for him." He helped Gordon to his feet. "I want you taking it easy for the rest of the day, understand?"

Gordon nodded. "Yes sir." He walked into the house.

Jeff eyed Scott critically. His eldest had dark circles under his eyes and moved stiffly. "You too. In fact, I want you to march your butt down to the infirmary and let Virgil and Brains take a look at you." Scott started to protest. "Either that or I take you to Sydney." Jeff's tone booked no argument.

Scott scowled and marched inside. Virgil looked up and raised an eyebrow at his father. "You could've at least waited until he had his coffee."

Jeff shook his head. "I'm tired of him pretending nothing's wrong."

Virgil was quiet a moment. "I'd rather wait and have Steve look at him Dad."

"Virgil." Virgil looked up. "You haven't set foot in that infirmary since John left." Jeff said reprovingly.

"I-I…Dad what if I get it wrong?" Virgil said quietly, not meeting his father's eyes. "What if I screw up?" He shook his head. "No Dad, I can't." He got to his feet and disappeared inside.

Jeff stayed where he was by the side of the pool and sighed. _What do I do now?_

"Mister Tracy?" Jeff looked up. "May I?"

"Of course."

Kyrano sat down next to Jeff. "You are troubled."

Jeff nodded. "This family has fallen apart Kyrano. And I can't blame the Hood this time." He sighed. "It's my fault."

"Why do you think that?"

"If I hadn't pushed my sons to be what **I** wanted them to be, all this never would have happened." Jeff replied.

Kyrano nodded. "I see. So you are saying that you regret the path you have chosen for your life, and for theirs."

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"And International Rescue?"

Jeff shrugged. "I don't know Kyrano. If I hadn't started it, then all this wouldn't be happening. I never would have even known who the Hood was. Then he never would have attacked my family. To him, we wouldn't even exist."

"And neither would you have me."

Jeff looked up, startled. Kyrano continued. "And the people who have benefited from you and your sons, they would not be here either. Did you not consider that?"

Jeff grew very still for a long time. It was so quiet that they could hear the breakers down at the beach. "I miss them. My sons. The way it used to be." He smiled. "Scott vowing to fly every aircraft ever made. Virgil hammering on his piano day and night, until the piece sounded perfect. Gordon playing jokes on everyone. Alan pestering me about staying here and being a Thunderbird. And John…" Jeff sighed. "John was my rock. The one person who I could tell anything and everything to. And he used to do the same. I knew his greatest fears and his greatest ambitions. How did I lose that Kyrano? How can I get it back?"

Kyrano looked out over the ocean. "Parenthood is never an easy road to travel. There are many curves and twists before the road straightens again." He placed a hand on Jeff's shoulder. "Mister Tracy, you are on the twists of parenthood, yet your sons will find their way back to you and you to them. You will all be changed but whole again. Have faith in this my friend. And in yourselves."

"I wish I could believe that Kyrano." Jeff sighed and looked up at the house. "I should go check on Gordon. And Scott too." He said, but made no move to get up.

Kyrano smiled. "I will look after them my friend." He got to his feet and started across the terrace, then paused and turned back. "Just remember, by ignoring the elephant in the room, doesn't make him go away." With and enigmatic smile, he disappeared inside.

Jeff sat still pondering what Kyrano had told him. Finally, he sighed to himself and with one last look up at the heavens, he went into the house.

* * *

By dinnertime, Alan had yet to make an appearance. Jeff was starting to be concerned. He had searched all of Alan's usual haunts and came up empty. He had even tried tracking him on his wrist com, only to discover that Alan had left it in his room. Now he had Fermat in front of him. He had the feeling the young man knew exactly where Alan was, but was determined not to say.

"Fermat, I need to talk to Alan." Jeff stated.

Fermat shrugged and looked away. "H-He wants to be left a-a-a-by himself."

Jeff sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Just tell me, is he alright?"

Fermat nodded. "Y-Y-Yes Mr. Tracy."

"If you talk to him, please tell him I'm looking for him." Fermat nodded and hurried from the room.

Tin-Tin watched from the patio as Jeff walked out onto his terrace. Moving slowly as not to catch his attention, she melted into the bushes. Once out of sight of the house, she ran down to the beach, and then followed it until she reached a low outcropping of rocks. Skirting around them, she came to a small lagoon. As she suspected, Alan was sitting at the edge of the water, skipping stones. She walked over and sat down next to him.

"Hey."

"Hey." Alan didn't look up at her.

"Your father's looking for you. He even cornered Fermat."

This time Alan did look up. "What did Fermat say?"

Tin-Tin smiled. "That he didn't know where you were."

Alan chuckled to himself. "Go Fermat. I figured he'd cave."

"Me too." They both laughed, then Alan grew quiet again. "Gordon's OK. He said he got a cramp." Tin-Tin told him.

"Seeing him at the bottom of the pool like that." Alan shuddered. "I've never been so scared in my life. Well, maybe…" He sighed.

"Alan, it's alright to be scared." Tin-Tin said softly.

Alan shook his head. "No Tin-Tin. I'm a Tracy, we don't get scared."

"Are you kidding me? When you went missing, your father was freaking out."

"Dad? Dad doesn't freak out."

She nodded. "He wasn't eating or sleeping. All he did was try and find you."

"But he never told John. John didn't even know I was gone." Alan's voice was full of hurt.

"He had his reasons Alan. John is…not himself. Something happened to him." She frowned. "I think it's leftover from the first attack on Thunderbird 5. It changed him. He's afraid." She said, more to herself than Alan.

Alan shook his head firmly. "Not John, he's not afraid of anything."

Tin-Tin looked up at him, her coffee eyes boring into his. "You weren't there Alan. You didn't see what my un...what the Hood did to him. To all of them."

Alan's head snapped up. "What do you mean?"

Tin-Tin sighed. "He—the Hood—he got inside John's head somehow. Inside his thoughts. He used them against John."

"Used them how?"

She looked out at the waves crashing on the shore. "John…John was nervous about going back to Thunderbird 5. He was afraid of being up there alone. He thinks he's useless." She said quietly.

Alan peered closely at her. "John told you this?"

Tin-Tin shook her head. "I heard him." She whispered.

"Heard him? Tin-Tin, you can read his mind?" Alan looked stunned.

"I…I didn't mean to. He _thinks_ so loudly!"

Alan started to giggle, then burst out laughing. After a moment, Tin-Tin joined in. "If anyone ever could think too loud, it would have to be John." Alan said, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"Well, he does!" This set them both off again.

They finally got themselves under control and Alan turned to Tin-Tin. "Do you think the Hood is controlling John? Like he did…before? With the others?"

She shook her head. "I don't think he's that powerful. I think he merely inserted these thoughts into John's head, and it spiraled out from there."

"What kind of thoughts?"

She sighed. "Fear, helplessness." She looked at him. "He doesn't feel like he's part of the family anymore. That your father sent him away on purpose."

Alan shook his head. "That's not true. Dad would never do that."

"I know! But Hood has John all mixed up inside. And the more he thinks about it, the worse it gets."

Alan was quiet a few minutes. "That's why he left. He doesn't think we care, and by his leaving us, it gets proved right." He sighed. "This sucks."

"Yeah it does." They both sat, swinging their legs in the water.

"Tin-Tin, can _you_ help John?" Alan asked.

She shook her head. "I don't think so. I'm not that powerful."

"Yet." Alan grinned.

She blushed. "Alan…"

They sat there quietly for a long while, until the sun started to set. "I suppose we should get back." Alan said tentatively.

"I guess so." Tin-Tin replied.

Neither moved.

Finally, it began to get dark. They got to their feet and started back to the villa. Tin-Tin stumbled on a rock and Alan grabbed her hand to steady her. She thanked him and they continued on, this time with Tin-Tin in the lead.

"Alan? I think you need to talk to Gordon. He's pretty upset about—" Her words were cut off as Alan stumbled into her this time.

"Sorry Tin-Tin!" Alan said. He was standing very close to her, his face inches from hers. For the first time, he noticed the tiny flecks of gold in her brown eyes. "Tin-Tin…" He leaned forward and placed his lips on hers. They were soft and warm. Suddenly he realized what he was doing and pulled back.

Tin-Tin held her breath as Alan kissed her. He started to move back, and she grabbed his shoulders, and pushed her lips back against his. After a long moment, they broke apart, each breathless.

Neither spoke. They didn't have to. Hand in hand, they walked up to the house.


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own the Thunderbirds or their characters, just the ones I made up.

* * *

"Hey Christa, got something for you."

Christa looked up from her chart to see her co-worker walking towards her carrying a large vase of pale pink tulips.

"What on earth?" Christa stared as Marla put the vase on the table. "Who could have sent me these?"

"Why don't you read the card and find out!" Marla laughed.

Christa stuck her tongue out at her friend and pulled out the card.

_Christa,_

_Thanks for your help yesterday._

_I'd like to repay you with dinner._

_Maybe tonight?_

_John_

"So? Who are they from?" Marla asked.

Christa smiled. "Remember that guy I told you about yesterday?" Marla nodded. "Him. He wants to take me to dinner."

"Nice!" Marla winked at her. "By the way, they were hand delivered."

Christa's head snapped up. "What? Why didn't you tell me?" She hurried out the door.

She spotted him talking to one of the other nurses. _Wow! And I thought he looked good the other day!_ John was wearing jeans and a pale blue button down shirt. He looked up at her and smiled. Christa felt her heart pounding in her chest as he made his way over to her.

"Hi. Hope I'm not bothering you." John said.

"Not at all." She led him back into the nurse's lounge. "Thank-you for the tulips. They're beautiful."

"No problem." John smiled and Christa noticed just how blue his eyes were. "What?" He asked when he noticed her staring at him.

She blushed. "Nothing. How are you feeling?"

John shrugged. "Better. You were right. I was stupid, thinking I could go jogging."

"Glad you survived the experience."

"Me too." He laughed.

They both grew quiet for a few minutes. "So, can I…take you to dinner?" John asked when the silence had gone on too long.

Christa smiled. "Sure. I'm off at three today. Say around six?"

"Sure. Any preferences?"

She shook her head. "Surprise me."

John grinned. "You're on. How about casual, nothing dressy?"

"That would be fine." She sighed. "I hate to say this, but I have to get back to work."

"That's OK. I've got to get back to my jogging." He grinned cheekily at her, his ice blue eyes twinkling.

She slapped him lightly on the arm. "Don't you dare!" They walked back out into the hallway and Christa led him to the elevator.

"I'll see you later." He stepped into the elevator.

"John wait!" John held the door open with his hand. "You don't know where I live!"

He winked. "Oh yes I do. See you at six." Winking, he let the door close.

Christa laughed to herself and walked back towards the lounge. Marla grabbed her arm and pulled her inside. "Do you have any idea how lucky you are?" She exclaimed.

"What are you talking about?" Christa asked, puzzled.

"That guy!"

"John?"

Marla rolled her eyes. "Yes John! Don't you know who he is?"

"Am I supposed to?"

Marla grabbed a magazine off the table and leafed through it. "Here. Look at this."

Christa's eyes scanned the article. "What am I looking at?"

Marla sighed. "Look at this." She pointed to a picture.

"**Shown here is billionaire benefactor, Jeff Tracy with two of his sons, Scott and John. Mr. Tracy recently donated a million dollars to the St. Jude's Children Hospital." **Christa looked up, eyes wide. "Oh God…I never asked his name." She glanced down at the picture again. "He seemed so…normal. He didn't act like a billionaire."

Marla laughed. "Got the looks too. You hooked a live one Christa." She waved as she left the room.

Christa ran her finger along John's picture. "John Tracy…hmmmm…."

* * *

John stood in front of Christa's apartment building and took a deep breath. Then wincing, he absently rubbed his side, and pressed the doorbell. _"Hello?"_

"Hi Christa. It's me." John replied.

"_I'll be right down."_

John turned and watched a family in the park across the street. A little girl was chasing after the butterflies, and her father was trying to keep up with her. He smiled to himself.

He heard the door open behind him and turned. Christa stood there smiling. She wore jeans and a deep purple sweater. "Hi there."

"Hi yourself. Ready?" John asked, offering her his arm.

They walked across the park, and made their way up Commonwealth Ave. "Where are we going?" Christa asked.

"How about the North End? You like Italian?"

She nodded. "But we're not walking all the way to the North End. We'll take the T." She steered him over to a stop.

John rolled his eyes, but allowed her to pull him. "Christa I'm fine."

"Yeah, and I'm a brain surgeon." She pulled two tokens out of her pocket and they boarded the train.

A short time later, they were seated at an outside table, eating breadsticks and sharing a bottle of red wine.

"What do you do for a living John?" Christa asked.

John turned red and took a sip of wine. "I'm a scientist."

"What kind of scientist?"

"Astrophysicist."

Her eyes widened. "Really? My mom is too. Have you been in space?"

"Yes." He answered before thinking. "I mean….I did some work on the ISS last year." He told her taking a large sip of wine._ Stupid John, real stupid._

She smiled. "So you're an astronaut too."

"Yeah, I guess you could say that." He took another sip of wine. "What about you? Have you always wanted to be a nurse?"

She nodded. "I used to con all the kids in the neighborhood to let me operate on them."

John laughed. "I'll bet." The waiter brought their pizza and they were quiet for a few minutes as they ate.

"So, tell me about these four brothers of yours." Christa asked him.

John smiled. "Let's see, Scott's the oldest, then me, Virgil, Gordon, and Alan's the baby."

"Interesting names."

John blushed. "My dad was in the space program and named us all after astronauts." To his surprise, Christa burst out laughing. He glared at her. "What's so funny?"

"It's just…" She laughed again, and John sat back and waited until she got herself under control.

"Well?" John asked, pouring them both another glass of wine.

"My mom. She did the same thing." At John's puzzled expression, she pointed to herself. "Christa, as in McAuliffe, my sister Sally…"

John nodded. "Ride, gotcha."

"I have a brother too." This time it was Christa's turn to blush. "I'm almost afraid to tell you."

John had a sinking feeling he knew where she was going. "Not…"

She nodded. "Jeff. As in Tracy." She looked up at him. "Why didn't you tell me who you were?"

John looked down uncomfortably. "I don't know…"

She reached across the table and took his hand. "It's OK. I understand, believe me." He looked up at her tone. "My last name is Lynch. Like the big brokerage firm."

A smile crept along John's face. "You manage our stocks."

"Not me, I'm a nurse remember?" They both chuckled.

After desert, John hailed a cab. "Want to get off at the Common and walk for a bit?" He asked.

She eyed him critically. "Are you feeling up to it?"

"Yes." He sighed. "Christa look, one of the reasons I left home was because everyone was hovering over me. OK, so going for a run yesterday wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done, but I had my reasons. And I learned my lesson and won't do it again. So, please trust me when I say I'm fine." His voice came out sharper than he intended and he sighed. "I'm sorry. I've been under alot of stress lately."

Christa smiled and took his had. "I'll forgive you if you forgive me for the mother-henning."

John smiled back. "Deal. Let's go for a walk."

Hand in hand they strolled through the park, stopping once for John to buy them a pretzel off a street vendor. They continued down the Commonwealth Avenue Mall, talking and laughing. Finally they ended back up in front of Christa's door. "Can I take you to a movie or something later this week?" John asked her.

"I'd like that." She smiled up at him, her indigo eyes twinkling. "I had a good time tonight."

"I did too." He leaned forward and kissed her softly on the cheek. "I'll call you later."

"Good night John."

"Night Christa." He waited until she was inside, then headed for home. He decided to walk, even though it was much cooler out than he was used to. He tended to keep Thunderbird 5's temperature fairly high so his occasional trips back home to the island wouldn't be too uncomfortable.

By the time he reached Mass Ave., his chest was bothering him enough to call a cab home. Once inside, he sat down on the couch and flipped on the news. There was nothing remotely interesting on, so he put on some music and pulled out a book instead. A short time later, he got up and poured himself a glass of whiskey. Eyeing the bottle, he made a mental note to go to the store tomorrow, then he settled back down to read.

* * *

John awoke at dawn the next morning. He stretched carefully, and glanced around the room. The house had six bedrooms, plus a loft. When Scott had turned twelve, he announced that he and John weren't sharing a room with the babies anymore, meaning Virgil and Gordon, and he wanted their own room. Jeff complied by renovating the attic turning the entire room into a large loft, complete with skylights and a window seat. Scott and John eagerly moved in, allowing their younger brothers up on special occasions. _Like when Dad said so._ John chuckled to himself.

He got up and showered, then ate a breakfast of eggs, toast and his customary mug of hot chocolate. After washing the dishes, he looked around the kitchen. _Now what? I'm done with the whole 'take it easy' routine. And I don't feel like doing anything touristy. The Sox are out of town too._ He paused thoughtfully for a few minutes. _I've got it! Time to spend some of that money I've been hoarding._ Grabbing his jacket, he hurried out the door.

* * *

The sleek black Jeep Cherokee pulled up in front of the brownstone. The door opened and John stepped out. He was dressed in black pants, a tight deep burgundy t-shirt, a black leather jacket and dark sunglasses. His hair had been trimmed, leaving it longer in the back and short on the side. He went into the house, pausing in front of the hall mirror. _I look like a bad-ass. Wonder what the others would say?_

As if the thought summoned them, the phone rang. John went to answer it. His brother Scott appeared on the monitor. _"Hi John."_

John was momentarily stunned by his older brother's appearance. Scott was pale with dark circles under his eyes. He forced himself to smile. "What's up Scotty?"

Scott raised an eyebrow at John. _"That's a new look for you."_

John sat down and shrugged. "I needed a change. Bought a car too. Jeep."

Scott's eyes lit up. _"What color? Please don't say yellow."_

John laughed. "Black. Fully loaded."

Scott sighed. _"Nice. Standard I hope."_

"Are you kidding me? Drive a standard in the city?"

"_Wuss."_

John laughed again. "So Scott, what do you need?"

"_Nothing. Just wanted to see how you were."_

John frowned. His brother was hiding something. "Scott, what?"

"_Gordon."_

John felt a chill go through him. "What happened?"

"_He was swimming yesterday and got a cramp. He wasn't breathing when Alan and Virgil got him out of the water."_

"And now?" John asked hoarsely. Though he wasn't happy with his youngest brother, he certainly didn't wish him any harm.

"_He's fine. Virgil took care of him."_ John breathed a sigh of relief. _"I wanted you to know. I didn't want you to think we weren't telling you." _Scott said quietly

"Thanks Scott." John sighed. "I went on a date last night." He said, trying to change the subject.

Scott looked up in surprise. _"Really? Who is she? Is she hot?"_

John laughed. "I think she is. Her name's Christa, and get this, she, her sister and brother are named after astronauts. Sally and Jeff."

"_Jeff? As in Dad-Jeff?"_ Scott laughed. _"That's priceless. Wait until you tell Dad."_

John's smile faded. "Scott, what's wrong? You look like hell."

"_It's nothing."_

"Don't lie to me."

Scott sighed and ran his good hand through his hair. _"It hurts John. Virgil says he doesn't think anything is wrong, but he wants me to go to the mainland and have it looked at."_

"Go back to Sydney."

"_Maybe."_ He sighed again. _"I miss you John. We all do. Dad's wandering around lost, Virgil never leaves his piano, and then there's Alan and Gord. Hell, they're driving us all nuts alternately screaming at or ignoring each other."_ He looked up into John's eyes._ "I can't play the peacemaker like you can John. We need you back."_

John shook his head. "I can't Scott. Not yet. Maybe not ever." He said softly.

"_Please don't say that John. We lost Mom, we can't lose you too."_

John clenched his eyes shut. "Scott…"

Scott sighed. _"Just think about it. OK?"_

"OK."

"_So, tell me more about this Christa."_

"What's to tell? She's cute and she likes Italian food. How can I go wrong?" John grinned.

"_She the nurse?"_

John narrowed his gaze. "How do you know that?"

Scott mentally cursed himself. _"John, I—"_

"You've been checking up on me?" John's voice was deadly calm. "How? Through my communicator or Steve?"

"_John it's not like that!"_

"What is it then Scott? You and Dad think I need a babysitter? That I'm not capable of taking care of myself?"

"_Maybe if you weren't drinking yourself into an early grave we wouldn't have to check on you!"_ Scott retorted hotly.

John's eyes flashed dangerously. "Go to hell Scott. And tell the rest of the family to go with you." He cut the connection. It immediately started ringing again. John ignored it and paced the room angrily. He started to open the liquor cabinet when Scott's words came back to him. Scowling, he slammed the door shut and stood, his body quivering in anger. _The hell with him. The hell with all of them._

He took off his communicator and stared at it for a moment. Then smiling ferally, he went into the kitchen and dropped it in the sink. He turned the water on, and watched as it moved towards the drain. Finally John flipped the switch to the garbage disposal and watched until the device had been ground down to nothing. Then turning off the disposal and without a backward glance, he marched out of the room.

* * *

Gordon heard Scott yelling through the closed door of the office. He thought he heard John's voice as well, but couldn't make out what was being said. Then the room went silent, and he peered into the office. Scott was slumped forward in his chair in front of the video phone, his head in his good hand.

"Scott?" There was no reply. Gordon moved closer. "Scott? You OK?"

Scott looked up, his grey eyes full of anguish. Gordon knelt down next to him. "Scott, what happened? Who where you talking to? Was it John?"

Scott nodded. "He…I…dammit Gordie!" He put his head in his hand again.

"Tell me what happened."

"We were talking, really talking and I had to go screw it up." Scott muttered.

"What did you say?"

Scott shook his head. "I can't. I promised Dad I wouldn't."

Gordon tilted Scott's head up so he could look his brother in the eye. "Don't you think there've been enough secrets in this family?"

Scott sighed. "He's still drinking. Steve went to see him the other day and he was drunk, and it wasn't even noon." Scott shook his head. "We never should have let him leave."

Gordon tried to keep his voice neutral, but he was seething inside. "We couldn't have stopped him Scott, you know that."

"Dammit we didn't even try!"

"Scott, I care about him too, but we can't help him if he won't let us." Scott started to shake his head. ""No Scotty, listen to me. He doesn't care about anything right now. Not us, not IR, not himself. There's nothing we can do except wait and hope he comes around."

Scott stared at his brother with haunted eyes. "What if he doesn't Gord? What if we can't get him back?"

Gordon shook his head. "I don't know. Just be there to pick up the pieces I guess."

Scott shook his head. "This is all my fault…"

"How is this your fault? John's the one with the problem."

"You don't get it Gordon, it's my fault he's drinking so much."

Gordon snorted. "You didn't hold a gun to his head Scott. He's a big boy, he knows what he's doing."

"I brought alcohol up to TB 5." Scott said quietly.

Gordon's eyes opened wide. "You what? When?"

"When I stayed behind." Scott sighed. "I thought…I brought the booze, hoping maybe I could get him to relax and open up. I didn't think I'd change him into an alcoholic."

"Scott listen to me. You didn't do this to John. _John _did this to John. OK, you brought a bottle up with you, so what? Did you hold him down and pour it down his throat?" Scott shook his head. "So what's the problem? Scott, don't let him do this to you." Gordon smiled encouragingly at his eldest brother. "Go get some rest bro. You look like hell."

Scott smiled tiredly. "Yeah, you're right." He got up carefully and made his way towards the door. "Thanks Gord."

"Anytime Scott, anytime." Gordon waited until he was sure Scott was out of hearing and turned to the phone. "Now Johnny, let's you and me have us a little chat."

* * *

John looked up when the phone rang again. "You want to finish this Scott, let's finish it." He punched the answer button. "I have nothing to say to you Scott."

"_It's not Scott."_

Startled, John looked into the face of his second youngest brother. "Gordon."

"_You're acting like a real prick, you know that Johnny."_

John scowled. "Don't start with me Gordon."

Gordon shook his head. _"I'm not starting anything. I'm finishing."_ He leaned close to the screen, his eyes boring into John's. _"I don't know what you said to Scott, he won't tell me, but by God if you don't knock off this 'Holier than thou' attitude, I'm going to march myself to Boston and pound the snot out of you."_

"I'd like to see you try." John retorted angrily.

"_You hurt him."_ Gordon continued. _"You hurt all of us, and now you're throwing some kind of guilt trip to make yourself feel better. Well let me tell you something brother-mine, it's not gonna work with me." _Gordon's tone was as cold as ice.

"Go to hell Gordon." Gordon's words stung more than John wanted to admit.

"_You wish Johnny."_

"Why don't you all just leave me alone!"

"_Because brother dear, contrary to popular belief, we actually **care** about you. It's killing Scott not having you here, and Dad…well, between you and Lady P., Dad's barely hanging on himself." _

"Don't pin that on me. I had nothing to do with whatever happened to him and Penny." John protested.

"_I never said you did. This is exactly what I'm saying John. The universe doesn't revolve around you. I suggest you get your head out of your ass and figure that out for yourself." _Without another word, Gordon cut the connection, leaving John standing stunned.

John stared at the empty screen for a few moments, then scowling to himself, marched over to the liquor cabinet and poured a drink. _Gordon doesn't know what he's talking about. And I'm not drinking myself to death. So I have one once in a while, it's not like I'm doing drugs or anything._

He poured himself another. _Care about me-HA! They probably haven't even noticed I'm gone._

Another drink. _I'm happy here, I can take care of myself. Make decisions about my own life._

He swallowed the last of the bottle. _I don't need them._

_I don't need anyone._


	5. Chapter 5

Still don't own 'em, just the ones I made up. Please do not use or copy without my permission, this includes C2 archives. Thanks!

Again, thanks to Sam 1 for letting me bounce ideas off her:)

* * *

Over the next couple weeks, John settled into a comfortable routine. He and Christa saw each other nearly everyday. On her days off, they went to the beach, took in a ball game, or just sat in the park and talked.

Christa was far more outgoing than John, and she seemed to accept the fact that she would have to start their conversations. They talked about everything. She told him that she had moved alot as a child, while her mother worked at the various NASA facilities. They had finally settled in Connecticut when she was in high school and after graduating from Yale, she started at Mass General.

John had to be more creative with his past. He told her of going to MIT and graduating with honors, then working in the space program for a few years before quitting to join the family business. "On day my dad came home and announced we were moving. We packed up the farm, and moved to an island in the south Pacific." He told her as they sat down under a tree down on the Esplanade.

"Really? Your own island?" Christa's eyes got a faraway look. "I'd love that…"

"Wouldn't you miss winter?" John asked, smiling at her.

She shook her head. "No more shoveling, scraping the car, falling on the ice? It would be tough, but I think I could get used to it."

John laughed and she threw her apple core at him. "OK, OK, I give up!"

She settled back against him, and he wrapped his arms around her. "You don't mention your mother much. Are your parents divorced?" She felt him stiffen and turned to look up at him. "John? Are you alright?"

He shook his head. "My mother…died when I was twelve."

"Oh John, I'm so sorry. What happened?"

John sat up and stared out across the Charles. "We were skiing inColorado. There was an avalanche. The resort staff told us to stay inside the main buildings and we would be safe. They were wrong." He said quietly.

"John, I'm sorry." Christa said again, taking his hand.

He smiled down at her, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "It's OK. It was a long time ago. That's one of the reason's my father moved us to the island. Change of scenery."

"I can understand that." She settled herself back in his arms. "Tell me more about your brothers."

"I told you all about them. What about you?" John asked.

"My sister Sally is three years older than me. She's a teacher and she and my brother-in-law have two children, Fletcher who's six and Susie who's four. Jeff is seventeen and in a rock band." Christa rolled her eyes.

John laughed. "Garage band, hopes to make it big."

She nodded. "Is this something all boys go through?"

He shrugged. "Don't know. I was always sleeping through the day so I could stay up all night with my telescope. Virgil's the only one of us that's musically inclined. He plays a mean piano."

"Classical or modern?"

"Just about anything. He can hear a piece only once or twice and play it back to you." John smiled. "He's pretty incredible."

"He's the middle one right? Isn't he an artist too?"

John nodded. "Yep. Scott's the oldest, he's a crack pilot. Gordon takes online classes through the University of California at Berkley. He's studying oceanographic studies. We usually have to pry him out of the ocean with a crow bar."

"Are you related to the Tracy that won the gold in the Olympics a couple of years ago?" Christa asked.

John smiled. Despite his lingering anger at his younger brother, he was still proud of his accomplishments. "Yeah, that's my little brother Gordon. Puts us all to shame."

Christa laughed. "And the youngest…I can't remember his name."

"Alan." John sobered. "Alan wants nothing more than to be a…a part of our business, but Dad wants him to finish school first. He's enrolled at Wharton Academy."

Christa looked up at him. "Exactly what is it Tracy Enterprises does that you all want to work there?"

John shrugged. "We encompass all kinds of things. Research and development, production, that sort of stuff." He hedged.

Christa frowned at him. "What aren't you telling me John Tracy?"

He smiled charmingly. "Me, not tell you something?"

She laughed at his seemingly innocent expression. "Brat!"

"But you like me anyway." He said, kissing her lightly.

"Yes, I do." She pulled him down to her and kissed him breathless.

"Christa…" He pulled her towards him again.

When they finally pulled apart, her indigo eyes were twinkling. "What do you say we move this indoors?" She said huskily.

John felt like he swallowed his tongue. "I—I—We—"

She laughed. "I'll take that as a yes." She got to her feet and helped him to his, frowning a little at his wince. "Still sore?"

"Some. Not as much as before." He replied as they started down the path towards the brownstone. "I think I'm finally starting to heal."

"How long ago was your crash?"

"Almost five weeks now." He looked sideways at her. "Why?"

She smiled. "Just calculating how fit you are." She laughed as John turned beet red. "I never met a man who blushes like you do John." He muttered something she couldn't hear, making her laugh even more.

Soon they were at the house, and John unlocked the door, opening it for Christa to go first. She stepped into the hallway and paused to look around. "What a beautiful—" Her words were cut off as John crushed his lips to hers. She gripped his shoulders as her knees turned to jelly and a moan escaped her.

"Fit enough for you?" John growled, his lips moving down her throat.

"I'll say…" She replied breathlessly. He moved his lips to hers again.

A sudden beeping startled them both. John groaned and rested his forehead on top of hers. "Please don't tell me that's what I think it is?"

Christa wormed out of his embrace and pulled her pager out of her pocket. Looking at it, she frowned. "Can I use the phone?"

He groaned again and pointed to a desk in the living room. She hurried inside and he could hear her talking. When she came out again a few minutes later, she wore a disappointed look on her face. "John, I'm sorry. There's been a bus accident. I have to go in."

John's head snapped up. "Where?"

"Down on the interstate. The local authorities are taking care of it. It wasn't as bad as it could be, but there are a few criticals." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. "Can I take a rain check?"

"I'll have to think about it." He teased.

She swatted him lightly. "Beast."

"You ain't seen nothing yet…" He kissed her again and pulled her close, closing his eyes. "What are you doing for the Fourth?"

She looked at him. "Nothing special. I managed to get a long weekend. I thought about heading down to Connecticut to see my parents. Want to go?"

John thought a minute. "How about we stay here for the fireworks, and then go the next day? I haven't seen Fourth of July fireworks in years."

She smiled. "Sounds good to me. I'll call Mom tonight and let her know we're coming." She kissed him again, reluctant to leave. "I have to go John."

"I know." He pulled her close again. "Come back tonight." He whispered huskily.

"I'll try." She took a step back, then turned to him again. "I really have to go."

"So go."

"Arugh!" She planted one last kiss on his lips and fled out the door.

John watched as she trotted down the steps. She paused once at the bottom and waved. He waved back and sighing, walked towards the kitchen.

The force of the headache hit him like a physical blow. John staggered against the doorframe, his vision swimming before his eyes. He fell to his knees moaning, his hands pressed against his temples.

"_John…you are alone…"_

"No…No I'm not." He moaned.

"_Yes, all alone…"_

"No…" He got to his feet and stumbled out into living room. He collapsed on the couch, moaning in pain.

"_All alone."_

* * *

Tin-Tin bolted awake. "John!" She closed her eyes tightly and concentrated, then moments later got up and ran out the door.

It was barely four in the morning, and the house was quiet. She quickly made her way to Alan's room and tapped lightly on the door. A minute later she could hear him stirring.

"Gordon, if this is some sort of joke..." Alan muttered as he opened the door.

Tin-Tin pushed by him. "Alan! I need your help!"

Alan shook the sleep out of his eyes. "Tin-Tin? Tin-Tin!" He realized he was wearing only a pair of boxers and blushed and tried to shut the door.

Tin-Tin pushed by him into his room. "Alan, please!"

He quickly ducked into the bathroom and pulled on a shirt and shorts. "What's going on?"

"It's John."

The last of the fog cleared out of Alan's head. "What happened?"

She paced the room nervously, wringing her hands together. "My uncle. He's hurting him."

"How?" Alan took Tin-Tin by the shoulders and shook her lightly. "Tin-Tin! How is he hurting John?" He demanded.

"I don't know. But I can hear him. I can hear John. He's in pain." Tin-Tin's eyes and voice were full of desperation. "We have to do something!"

Alan thought for a minute. "Let's try calling him first. It's dinnertime in Boston, he should be there. C'mon!" Taking Tin-Tin's hand, they rushed out the bedroom door and crashed right into Scott.

"Alan? Tin-Tin!" Scott frowned at the both of them. "You'd better have a good explanation for this." He demanded taking in Alan's hastily arranged attire and Tin-Tin still in her pajamas.

Alan met his oldest brother's gaze fearlessly. "There's something wrong with John."

Scott arched one eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

"Tin-Tin knows." Alan started to push past Scott. "Scott, we need to contact him and see what's going on!" He practically dragged Tin-Tin into his father's office. He started to sit down, but Scott shoved him out of the way.

"Move Sprout." Scott punched in the number to the brownstone. He frowned up at Alan. "There's no answer."

"Try his communicator." Alan suggested.

Scott punched in another series of commands on the computer.

"**Unit is no longer transmitting."**

"What the hell is that supposed to mean!" Now Scott was starting to get concerned, and he tried the phone again. "I think we'd better go get Dad."

Tin-Tin shook her head. "No. Let me try something first." She held her crystal in her hands and closed her eyes.

* * *

"_**John…"**_

John opened his eyes. "Tin-Tin?" He whispered.

"_**John fight him."**_

"I can't…"

"_**Yes you can! Fight him!"**_

"_Don't listen to her John. She doesn't really care about you."_

John fell to his knees on the floor. He clutched his head. "No stop. Please stop!"

"_**Leave him alone!"**_

"_He is alone."_

John's head snapped up, his eyes streaming tears. "I'm not alone!"

"_Then where is your family John? Why are they not here to help you?"_

"_**John fight him!"**_

John forced himself to his feet. "I chose to come here. I'm not alone!"

"_You can keep telling yourself that John."_

John staggered to the video-phone and punched in the number to Tracy Island.

"_They won't answer."_ Weaker this time.

"Yes they will!" John peered down at the screen willing someone to be there.

* * *

Back on the island, the phone rang. Scott jumped to answer it. At the same time, Tin-Tin's eyes rolled up in her head and she collapsed. Alan caught her and eased her down to the floor.

Scott sent an inquiring glance at Alan. He nodded back. Scott turned back to the screen. "John!"

"_Scott…Thank God."_

"John, what happened?" Scott demanded taking in his brother's haggard appearance.

John shook his head._ "I don't know. The Hood, he was…he was talking to me. Inside my head. And Tin-Tin…Scott, I don't understand what's happening to me!"_ He held his head in his hands.

"John, we don't either. But we're going to help you."

"_He said I was alone."_

The despair in John's voice tore at Scott's heart. "You're not alone John. We're all here. We'll **always **be here."

"_Scott…"_

"Look, I'm going to call Penny, see if she can tell us what's happening with the Hood."

John looked up, a haunted look on his face. _"Scott…I can't do this…"_

Scott leaned forward, his grey eyes glittering angrily. "Don't talk that way John Tracy. You're strong, you beat him once, you can do it again."

John took a shuddering breath and nodded. _"I'll try."_

"Damn right you will." Scott said. "Do you want me to come to Boston?"

John shook his head. _"No…not yet. Maybe in a few weeks."_

Some of the weight lifted off of Scott's shoulders. "A few weeks then." He smiled. "Call if you need anything Johnny."

"_I will…Scott, thanks."_

Scott nodded and cut the connection. He got up and knelt down next to Alan and Tin-Tin. "How is she?"

"I think she just fainted." Tin-Tin's eyelids fluttered. "Tin-Tin!" Alan helped her sit up. "Are you alright?"

She nodded. "I-I think so…"

"Honey? What happened?" Scott asked gently.

Tin-Tin clutched Alan's hand tightly. "John! What about John!" She asked, her eyes wild.

Alan pulled her close. "It's OK, we talked to him. Whatever you did worked."

She leaned against him, and Alan stroked her hair as Scott hid a smile. "Alan, can you take care of her?" Alan nodded. "I'm going to tell Dad." Scott held his hand up to stem their protests. "No. No more secrets in this family. That's what got us into this mess in the first place."

Alan nodded. "You're right. Go, I'll take care of her."

Scott nodded and squeezed Tin-Tin's shoulder. You did good honey." Then, getting carefully to his feet, he left them alone.

Scott walked down the hallway, and paused in front of his father's door. He raised his hand to knock, then hesitated. _Dad's sleeping, finally. If he were awake, he'd be up and around by now. I can wait a few more hours._ Scott lowered his hand and made his way back to his own bed. Lying down, he winced and massaged his bad shoulder. _Guess I need to have Virgil take another look at this. It feels worse, not better._ He lay there for a few minutes, then got up and swallowed a couple of his painkillers. Then, going back to bed, Scott closed his eyes, and a short time later fell back asleep.

* * *

Gordon glanced outside as he pulled on his swim trunks. It was past dawn, but there was a good chance he was still the first one up. He stepped out into the hallway, grinning when he saw all the doors to his brother's rooms still closed. He trotted down the stairs, and out of habit, glanced into his father's office. He went a few steps further, then stopped dead in his tracks. Shaking his head, he made his way back and cautiously peered inside.

Alan was sprawled, sound asleep on the couch. While this wasn't totally unusual, Tin-Tin being curled up in his brother's arms was. Gordon crept back and bolted for his room, returning a few moments later. He slowly moved towards the couch, his camera held in front of him. Neither Alan nor Tin-Tin moved as Gordon snapped off a dozen shots. Finally, still grinning he backed out again, and made his way to the pool.

* * *

Penny looked up as the phone on her desk buzzed. It was her direct line to Tracy Island. She stared at it thoughtfully for a few moments, then picked it up. "Hello?"

"_Penny?"_

Emotion washed through her, relief or disappointment, she wasn't sure which. "Hello Scott! Everything alright?"

Scott's image appeared on the screen. He shook his head._ "No, Penny. We have a problem. I need you to check on the Hood's current status."_

Penny frowned. "Oh course dear, but why?"

Scott shook his head. _"It's John. We think he's controlling John somehow."_

"Controlling him? How?"

"_Tin-Tin is hearing John thoughts. She says he's being attacked by her uncle."_

Penny looked skeptical. "Are you sure?"

Scott nodded._ "I know it sounds crazy, but I saw it."_ He shook his head again. _"Don't ask me to explain it, I don't get it myself."_

"All right Scott, I'll see what I can do." She looked away for a moment, and when she turned back, her expression was carefully guarded. "How is…everyone else?"

"_You can say his name Penny. Dad's a mess. What happened? He won't tell us a damned thing."_

She sighed. "He asked me to marry him." She said softly.

"_I take it you said no?"_ Penny nodded. _"You must have had a good reason."_ Scott continued. She nodded. _"You don't have to tell me." _He smiled at her. _"Just don't stay away from us too long. We miss you. We ALL miss you."_

Penny felt her eyes fill with tears. "Scott…"

Scott smiled. _"Love you Penny. See you soon."_ He disappeared.

Penny felt her heart lift. "See you soon." She whispered to the darkened screen. Then, straightening her shoulders, she pressed another button. "Parker, please bring the Bentley around. We're going to London."


	6. Chapter 6

Again, don't own the Thunderbirds...I can dream though...

* * *

John looked around and smiled in contentment. "This is great."

Christ shot him a quizzical look. "What?"

"All this!" John gestured around at everyone gathered on the Esplanade. "All these people! I can't remember the last time I spent a Fourth down here on Ear—in the states."

"Don't get off the island much do you?" She smirked.

He frowned down at her. "Behave or I take you home."

Her indigo eyes twinkled. "Promise?" She burst out laughing at the blush that spread across his face. She stood up on tiptoe and placed a kiss on his nose. "You're so cute!"

He grumbled something she couldn't make out, and she laughed again. John grabbed her hand and they continued walking down the path. They paused near the Hatch Shell to listen to the music, then turned back the other way. They paused to buy ice cream off a vendor, strawberry for Christa and chocolate of course, for John.

They continued walking, John stopping at one point to help a little boy whose remote control boat had stalled in the pond. He opened the control, and twiddled around for a few minutes, then handed it back. The boy yelped with pleasure as his boat started once again.

Christa leaned up and placed a soft kiss on John's lips.

"What was that for?" He asked, bemused.

"Just because." She replied.

"Christa, you are the most—" He stiffened, his gaze caught by something.

She turned. "What is it John?" He didn't answer, and she looked up at him. "John? Are you alright?"

He had gone pale, and his eyes darted around as if searching for something. "I just thought I saw someone, that's all."

"Who?"

He shook his head. "No one. It's nothing."

"John."

He smiled down at her. "Forget it. I'm seeing things. Let's find a place to sit and get something to eat." He took her hand and led her back to the vendors, pausing occasionally to glance around. Finally they took seats on the grass amidst the hundreds of other people waiting for the fireworks to begin.

John's mind whirled. _I saw him. I know I did. I saw the Hood. Somehow, he was here._ John gave himself a mental shake._ Dammit he can't be here! Scott talked to Penny. She said he's still in jail!_

"I hope it doesn't rain."

John turned. "Sorry, what did you say?"

"Hello! Earth to John!" She waved her hands in front of his face. "I said I hope it doesn't rain." Christa pointed off in the distance where dark clouds were starting to gather.

John sighed. _Great, a thunderstorm. Well, isn't that just perfect._

"Are you alright?" Christa's face was filled with concern.

John smiled. "Just thinking."

"Of anything in particular?"

"No, not really." He sighed. "OK, but you have to promise not to laugh."

She nodded. "I promise."

"The rain. It's been hot, and that's a cold front, which means a thunderstorm."

She looked at him, puzzled. "And your point would be…"

He frowned, then looked away. "I hate thunderstorms." He said quietly.

"What?"

"I said I hate thunderstorms. Always have, ever since I was a kid." John replied, still not looking at her.

"You're kidding me?" Christa tried to cover her giggle by taking a sip from her water bottle. John merely glared at her. "Oh John, please! You're what twenty-seven years old?"

"Twenty-five."

"I stand corrected, twenty-five, and afraid of thunder and lightning?" She chuckled, then sobered at the serious expression on his face. "John?" She called softly. "I'm sorry." He didn't turn, so she tilted his face towards her. His blue eyes were full of hurt. Hurt and something else she couldn't read. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were serious." She said again, kissing him tenderly.

John's eyes softened and his shoulders relaxed. "It's OK. Just something I'm sensitive about."

"I'll make it up to you." Christa said huskily. She placed her lips on his again, this time deepening the kiss. They stayed together that way until the first explosions thundered into the darkening sky.

Christa and John, along with everyone else, turned to watch the fireworks. As usual, they were timed to music and everyone Ohhed and Ahhed over them. Some time later, Christa turned to say something to John, when she noticed he wasn't there. Alarmed, she glanced around. Not seeing him, she got up and started walking calling his name. She finally spied him, standing under a tree and hurried to his side.

"John! What happened? I've been looking everywhere for you?" She asked.

John started to speak when another roar went up from the fireworks. He flinched, ducking down to his knees with his hands pressed to his temples.

Christa knelt by his side, her hand on his shoulder. "John?"

He looked up, his eyes wide with fear. "I want to get out of here." He rasped.

She nodded and taking his hand, led him through the crowd. He continued to cringe at each explosion and she quickened her steps. They were in the middle of the pedestrian bridge over Storrow Drive, when the first clap of thunder rumbled. A few seconds later, the sky opened and rain began pouring down.

By the time they reached the Tracy brownstone, both were soaked to the skin. John quickly unlocked the door, and they rushed inside. An enormous thunderclap, accompanied by bright lightning sounded just as John shut the door. He instantly dropped to the floor, covering his head with his hands.

Christa knelt down next to him and forced his head up to look at her. "John, honey it's OK, you're safe."

John was shaking uncontrollably and his eyes darted wildly around the room. Christa sat down on the floor and pulled him into her arms. She continued talking soothingly to him, until she felt him start to relax.

"Christa…" He said hoarsely.

"Shhhh!" She held him close, running her hands through his wet hair. "God! You're freezing! We need to get you out of these wet things." She got to her feet and helped him to his, noting with concern, the way he winced as his hand moved automatically to his side.

"Easy John. Where's the bathroom in this place?" She asked, leading him down the hallway.

"U-U-Upstairs." He chattered.

She led him up the stairs and he pointed to a door at the end of the hall. It opened into a large suite. They walked into the bathroom, and Christa turned the shower on. While the water was warming, she helped John out of his wet shirt and jeans, leaving him wearing only his boxers. She frowned at the scars on his chest, arm, and back, and made a mental note to ask him about them later. "Where are your clothes?" She asked.

"Top floor." He replied tonelessly.

"Are you going to be alright by yourself?" He nodded, still staring off into space. "John!"

He jumped, her voice startling him out of his reverie. "What! Yes, I'll be fine."

"OK then. I'll go find you some clothes. Holler if you need anything." She turned and left, closing the door behind her. Christa made her way through the house, finally finding the staircase leading to the attic room. Turning on the lights, she found the bureau and quickly pulled out a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. She pulled out another set for herself, and spying another bathroom, quickly stripped off her own wet clothes and hopped into the shower.

When she emerged a few minutes later, she held the pants up against her. Deciding they were too big, she rummaged through the drawer and found a pair of drawstring shorts instead. Pulling them on and the sweatshirt over her head, she made her way downstairs.

John had finished in the bathroom, so she laid the clothes on the bed and went searching for him. She found him sitting on the couch in the living room. He wore a dark burgundy robe and his hair was slicked back from his face. He had started a fire in the fireplace and held a glass of amber liquid in his hands. "John?" She called out softly.

He looked up and had to smile. The sweatshirt she had on was one of Scott's old Air Force ones, and she had the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. The waistband came down almost to her knees. "My brother Alan might have something here that will fit you better." He told her.

She spun in a circle. "What, you don't like this look?"

He laughed as she sat down next to him. "What are you drinking?" Christa asked, nodding at his glass.

"Whiskey." She made a face and John had to laugh. "Your last name's Lynch and you don't drink whiskey?"

"Guinness either."

John frowned at her. "We may have to rethink this relationship."

Before she could reply, another thunderclap shook the house. John flinched, dropping his glass. Christa wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Easy John, you're safe here." Instead of replying, he buried his face in her lap, clenching his eyes shut. She felt him shuddering and gently ran her fingers through his hair.

They sat there like that until eventually the storm moved off, and John's trembling stopped. He sat up and looked around warily. "John?" Christa said softly. He put his head in his hands. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." He quickly got to his feet, wincing and clutching his side. "Dammit!" He growled and waited for the pain to ebb.

Christa walked over and standing on tiptoe, turned his head to look at her. "John. Talk to me."

"I…I can't…"

She smiled, her indigo eyes filled with concern. "I won't hurt you John."

He pulled her close and closing his eyes, rested his head on top of hers. "I know."

They stood there for a few minutes before Christa pulled away. "Look, I left some clothes on the bed upstairs, why don't you get dressed, and I'll make us something to eat."

"Christa, you don't have to do this for me." John told her shaking his head.

She leaned up and kissed him. "I know. Now get up there and put something on before I take what you do have on off and have my way with you!"

She was rewarding for her teasing by a blush from John. He grinned though and went upstairs. She made her way into the kitchen and after a few minutes of searching, found a can of soup.

When John came down, she had the steaming soup in bowls on the table, and was just taking a pair of grilled cheese sandwiches off the stove. "Get 'em while they're hot!"

John smiled and sat down at the table. "Smells great."

"Then start eating. You're too thin." Christa said as she sat down across from him.

John rolled his eyes. "You sound like our cook at home. Onaha's always telling me the same thing."

"Two women can't be wrong. Eat."

John smiled and ate his soup, even though he had no appetite. Christa saw him picking at it and sighed. "So John, you told me you grew up on a farm in Kansas. Then why do you own this giant brownstone in Boston?"

John chuckled. "Well, my Mom's family is from Winchester, in fact my aunt and uncle still live there, and when we would come to visit, it was always a mess. There were seven of us and we're not really the quietest of families. So Dad figured it would be easier if he just bought a place for us. After Mom died, we didn't get here as often as we used to, and it's stayed empty, lucky for me."

"So why aren't you back with your family? I mean they're all still on your island right?"

"I had some things I had to do." He got up and put his bowl in the sink. "Want a tour of the house?" He asked, changing the subject.

Christa shook her head. _Just like a man._ "Sure." She took his outstretched hand and let him lead her through the house. She was in awe of the library, lovingly touching the rows of books on the shelves. "Wow…."

"Like books do you?" John asked, smiling.

"Who doesn't? I read anything I can get my hands on." She smiled dazzlingly at him. "What else do you have hidden around here?"

_If you only knew,_ John thought to himself. "The next floor is basically the bedrooms. Alan and Gordon share a room, Virgil has one of his own since he has the piano in it, and Dad's suite is where I showered. Then there's a couple of guest rooms. Scott and I used to share the attic."

"Used to?"

"Well he's not here now is he?" John grinned, then rubbed the back of his neck.

"Headache?" Christa asked.

John nodded. "Yeah, a little."

"Want a backrub?"

John looked up at her and grinned wolfishly. "Sure."

Christa rolled her eyes. "I'll bet you do. Come on." They went upstairs to John's room. "Take off the shirt, I can't work through material." She called as she walked into the bathroom.

John peeled off his sweatshirt, and lay facedown on the bed. He folded his arms under his head and closed his eyes. Within moments, he was fast asleep.

"Don't you have any moisturizer or anything around here? I'd even settle for hand cream at this point." She came out of the bathroom and stopped, staring at the figure on the bed. "John?" She called softly. He didn't move. She took the blanket off the other bed and placed it over him. Then she tucked herself in beside him and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. "Good night John." She turned off the light.

* * *

"**CRASH!"**

John bolted up, his eyes wide with fear, his heart pounding wildly in his chest.

"Easy John, it's just another thunderstorm."

John jumped at the voice next to him. "Jesus Christa! You scared the hell out of me!"

"**BOOM!"**

John dove back under the covers. Christa stifled a laugh. "John, come on out."

He peeked out. "You're laughing at me."

She smiled. "Yes, I am."

He sat up carefully, and tucked his arm around her, pulling her close. "I'm glad you're here." He said

"I am too." She felt him tense at each thunderclap, and as the storm moved off, he gradually relaxed. "What would you have done if I hadn't been here?" She asked.

"Easy. I'd have hid out in the cellar." John responded automatically.

Christa sat up and stared at him. "You're kidding right?"

John shook his head and got up. He carefully stretched his arms over his head, idly massaging his left side.

Christa padded up next to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her cheek against his bare back. "Ribs bothering you?" She said, lightly caressing his chest.

John shivered at her touch. "Some. I'm almost used to it by now."

They stood together, listening as the storm moved off. "John, how did you get this scar?" Christa asked, running her fingers along his back.

John tensed. "The…the crash. I had a piece of metal imbedded in there."

"Well whoever stitched you up really did a botch job. This is one of the worst scars I've ever seen." She said matter of factly.

"It's my fault. I didn't take it easy like I was supposed to, and tore them all to hell."

"Why am I not surprised?" She touched his right arm. "And this? Is this from the crash too?"

John nodded. "Burn."

She moved to his chest. "And this was from the chest tube?" John nodded.

Christa frowned. "When did this happen again?" The injuries just didn't make sense. The chest and back ones seemed much fresher than the arm.

"A little over a month ago. Near the end of May. Why?" He turned his head to look down at her.

She smiled up at him. "No reason. Just call it a professional curiosity."

John didn't reply and she wrapped her arms around him again. This time, he rested his hands on top of hers and sighed. "I'm glad you're here." He said again softly.

"John, what's really bothering you? You were upset at the fireworks, before the storm even started."

He broke free of her embrace and walked over to stand in front of the large bay window that over looked the Common. "Nothing's bothering me." His voice was strangely emotionless.

She walked over near, but not touching him. "Yes there is."

"I…I…" His hands clenched into fists.

"I want to help you John, but I can't if you won't let me in."

John stared out the widow, but she knew he wasn't seeing anything. "I'm afraid." He said so softly that she barely heard him.

Now she took his hand. "Take it slow. I'm here."

He closed his eyes and let the memories wash over him. _I was going over my data when the proximity alarm went off… _"I was flying home when I had engine trouble. I couldn't keep her in the air, and went down hard. I got a mayday out seconds before I crashed." He took a deep breath. "There had been a massive systems failure and I never received a reply of any kind, so I figured no one heard me. Luckily I was wrong." He broke free of her hand and paced the room. "I blacked out for a while. When I came to, I hurt all over. I couldn't breathe and my head was killing me. There was smoke everywhere." He sighed. "I must have blacked out again, because the next time I came to, I was looking into the face of my fath—a rescue worker. They had heard my call and came as fast as they could. Turns out it took my fam—the rescue team two hours to get to me. And another four to get me out of there. I really thought I was going to die. That we'd never get back." His voice shook.

"Get back?"

John shook his head. "Get out of the wreckage and back home. It's all kind of hazy after that. I spent a couple of days in the hospital and then did the rest of my recuperating back home."

Christa looked skeptical. "A couple of days? With a chest tube?"

_Shit._ "Maybe it was longer…I don't know. I kept floating in and out of consciousness. Next thing I knew, my family was around me and I was home."

"So what happened tonight?" She asked when the silence had gone on too long.

"The fireworks…they reminded me of…of the crash. There was so much noise. The smoke, the fire…." He clenched his eyes shut, his body trembling. "It all came back…" He whispered.

"Oh John…" Christa walked over and took him in her arms. He bent his head to her shoulder and his body shook with silent sobs. She held him close, gently running her fingers through his hair, until finally he started to pull back. He paced the short length of the room coming to sit back down on the window seat, his face in his hands.

"Christa, I'm sorry." He said hoarsely.

"For what?" She walked over and knelt down next to him. She pulled his hands from his face. "John look at me." He raised his red rimmed eyes to hers. "You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about." He started to look away again, but she caught his face in her hands. "John listen. Remember what I am? What I do? I'm a nurse. I've seen it all, and believe me when I tell you that a lesser person would have cracked up by now. You went through that horrible crash, and instead of dealing with it, you buried in down deep inside. Tonight, circumstances forced you to face it, and while is was terrifying, you survived. Again." Her tone softened. "John, it's going to be alright." She leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. It was meant to be a friendly kiss.

It didn't stay friendly for long.

John hauled her to her feet, crushing his lips against hers. He ran his hands up her body, making her moan with pleasure. Suddenly, he broke off the embrace and stepped back.

"Christa, God I'm sorry." Even in the dark, she could tell by his tone that he was blushing.

Instead of replying, she grabbed him and pulled him to her, this time leaving him breathless. "Do you want _me_ to apologize now?"

"No." His eyes burned into hers. "Stay with me tonight. Please."

Such a simple request, spoken from his heart. She smiled and ran her hands, then her mouth, up his bare chest, making him tremble. _The hell with this._ He reached down and swept her up in his arms, then carried her to his bed.


	7. Chapter 7

Still don't own them...sigh...

* * *

"Good morning!"

John opened his eyes to find Christa grinning at him. "Morning. What are you so happy about? You look like the cat who ate the canary."

She laughed and ran her fingers through his hair. "With this hair, you could be considered a canary. Do you color it?"

He frowned at her. "I most certainly do not." He rolled over so his back was to her. "Do I color it…" He grumbled.

She laughed and tickled him until he rolled back to her. She played with his hair again. "It's actually kind of sexy."

John snorted. "Sexy? My brother Gordon calls me Blondie, Golden Boy, or any other number of wonderful names he can think of."

"I like it." She kissed him softly, then deepened it. "I like it alot."

He grabbed her hands as they began to wander under the blanket. "Christa wait. About last night…"

"What about it? We're both adults, and obliviously done this before." She said, kissing his shoulder.

He pushed her back. "That's just it. Before last night, it's been a long time since I did this. A very long time."

"Like how long?"

He blushed. "Over a year."

She smiled. "Guess we'll just have to make up for lost time." She whispered as she pressed her mouth to his.

* * *

The alarm klaxon startled Virgil to the point where he dropped his brush. Bright green paint splattered across his bare feet. Cursing to himself, he hastily crushed out his cigarette on an old paint palette and not bothering to clean up, hurried out the door.

He was more annoyed to discover he was the last one to arrive at the Command-Control room. Gordon looked down at his brother's green stained feet, then back up to his hair and grinned. Virgil ignored him.

"What's up Dad?" Scott asked.

"Fire outside of Los Angles. Probably sparked from the fireworks yesterday." Jeff pulled up a screen. "You can see here where it's spread. It's now moving close to the residential areas. The local authorities have called for help."

"And are we responding? I thought we were shut down." Gordon stated, folding his arms across his chest.

"That's why I called you all here." Jeff met each of his son's gazes, along with Fermat, Brains, Tin-Tin and her parents. "Do we respond?"

"Hell yes!" Gordon shouted.

Virgil nodded in agreement.

"We have to go Dad. People could die." Alan said quietly.

Scott met his father's eyes for a brief second, then looked away.

Jeff frowned for a moment at his eldest, then shook his head. "All right then, here's the plan. Fermat, Tin-Tin, I want you to stay here with Brains and man Base. With Thunderbird 5 still down, it's going to take more than one person to monitor the equipment."

"FAB!" Both responded at the same time.

Jeff turned to his sons. "Virgil, you, Gordon and Alan get to Thunderbird 2. Make sure the Firefly is loaded and ready to go."

Alan's eyes lit up. "FAB Dad." The three of them disappeared behind their portraits.

"I'll keep an eye on things here Dad." There was no mistaking the frustration in Scott's voice.

"Scott, you and I will take Thunderbird 1 and survey the fire."

Scott looked up at his father. "What?"

Jeff smiled. "I'll need someone to keep an eye on Alan and man Mobile Control. Did you really think I was going to leave my Field Commander behind?"

Scott smiled. "Thanks Dad."

"Now get moving."

"FAB." Scott too disappeared behind his portrait.

Jeff walked over to his own and smiled back at the others. "Thunderbirds are go!"

* * *

John was standing in front of the mirror shaving when Christa called out from the shower. "We don't have to go if you're not feeling up to it."

"I said I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Because they'll understand."

John rolled his eyes and filled a cup with cold water. He quietly walked over to the shower, and tossed the water over the curtain. Christa yelped. "I said I was fine." John said as he went back to his shaving.

A few minutes later, he heard the shower shut off and Christa stepped out and wrapped herself in a towel. "Have a nice shower?" John asked innocently.

Without missing a beat, she took a towel off the rack and expertly flicked him in the behind. "Brat!"

"Right back at you." John flicked a towel of his own. She yelped again and ran into the bedroom, John at her heels.

Laughing, she threw a pillow at him, which he deflected easily. "I've got four brothers babe, you're going to have to try harder than that." He advanced slowly towards her and she backed away. Just before he could reach her, she ducked under his arm and bolted across the room. John flopped down on the bed, laughing and a moment later, she joined him.

"It's good to see you smile." Christa told him.

"Feels good too." John answered. His eyes narrowed. "Roll over."

"What? Hey!" She exclaimed as John shoved her face down on the bed.

"What's this?" He asked, running his fingers along her left shoulder blade.

She peered back and grinned. "Oh you mean my fairy."

"You have a tattoo?"

"Duh, you're looking at it. I thought you went to MIT?"

John shoved her head down into the pillow. "Why do you have a tattoo?"

She rolled over and shrugged. "I like them. They're very liberating. You should get one."

John rolled his eyes and got up. "Yeah, let some big sweaty biker guy named Killer permanently mark up my body. No thanks." He said as he pulled on his pants.

"Chicken."

His head snapped up and his blue eyes flashed. "What did you call me?"

Christa met his gaze without backing down. "I called you a chicken. Perhaps you should get your hearing checked."

John scowled and pulled his shirt over his head. "Are you going to lie there all day, or are you going to get dressed so we can leave?"

Christa got up and walked over to him. "Grumpy without your coffee, aren't you dear?" She said, patting his cheek.

John made a wry face. "Coffee is for barbarians. Hot chocolate."

"First thing in the morning?" Christa shivered with disgust. "Blech."

"Don't knock it till you've tried it babe." John frowned. "What are you going to wear? Let me go look down in Alan's room. I might be able to find you something until we get to your place."

* * *

An hour later they were on the road heading south. Though the thunderstorms of the night before were over, the sky was still overcast. They talked and laughed, arguing over the radio stations. John wanted classical, and Christa kept changing it to country. They finally agreed on a classic rock station and sat back to enjoy the ride.

A little after noon, they pulled up to Christa's parents house. Considering Christa's background, John was surprised at how modest the house was.

"What were you expecting?"

John turned to her. "What?"

Christa smiled. "I asked what you were expecting. A mansion?"

John frowned. "No."

She laughed and kissed him on the cheek. "Teasing hon. Relax, there's nothing to be nervous about."

"I'm not nervous." He said quickly. A little too quickly. "OK, maybe I am a little nervous." She raised an eyebrow. "Alot nervous."

"Why? We don't bite…much." She winked.

John sighed and rested his head on the steering wheel. "Remember what we discussed earlier? Well, that wasn't the only thing I haven't done in a long time."

She rubbed his neck affectionately. "You really should ask for a day off once in a while. What, your father keep you locked away somewhere?" She teased. John instantly tensed. "John? What is it?"

He sat up and tried to smile. "Come on, they're probably wondering what we're doing out here in the driveway."

Hand in hand they walked up to the door. Christa knocked once then opened it and stepped inside. "Mom? Dad? We're here!"

"Auntie Cwista! Auntie Cwista!" A tiny red headed whirlwind came down the hall and crashed into Christa.

"Whoa! Easy Susie!" Christa gathered the little girl up in her arms and hugged her tight.

"Gwampa said we can't go in the pool. It's going to wain." She pouted.

Christa laughed. "We'll just have to play inside."

Susie thought about that for a moment, then smiled. Her attention turned to John. "Who are you? You have pwetty hair."

John blushed and took her hand, kissing the back of it. "My name is John."

"I'm Susie. Fwetcher says I'm a bwat." She pouted again.

John laughed. "All big brothers say that. At least mine does anyway."

Her blue eyes opened wide. "You haf a big bwother?"

John nodded. "What's worse, I have three younger brothers too." He said seriously.

Her eyes grew wide. "Wow…That's alot of bwothers."

John and Christa burst out laughing. Christa put Susie down and she ran yelling down the hall, calling for her parents. Christa took John's hand again and led him down the hallway. They entered a large kitchen, which seemed full of people.

"Christa sweetie!" A tall man with a head full of steel grey hair enveloped Christa in his arms.

"Hi Daddy." She hugged him tightly and then turned to John. "Daddy I'd like you to meet John. John, my father Jack."

John held out his hand. "Pleased to meet you Mr. Lynch."

"Call me Jack. Come on in, can I get you something to drink?" Jack asked.

John shook his head. "No thank-you sir."

"Christa! We thought you'd never get here." A petite woman, barely taller than Christa, walked over and hugged Christa.

"We got a late start Mom." Christa said, winking at John.

John blushed and both women laughed. "Hello, I'm Meg."

"John Tracy ma'am."

Meg raised an eyebrow. "Any relation to Jeff Tracy, the astronaut?"

John nodded. "My father ma'am."

Meg smiled. "Well, well, isn't that something."

Christa rolled her eyes and took John's hand. "Mom, please. C'mon John you can meet the rest of this group." She led him over to a woman who looked strikingly like her, only with auburn hair and a taller, serious looking man. "John, my sister Sally and my brother-in-law Rick."

"Nice to meet you John." Sally smiled.

"Where's Jeff?" Christa asked, looking around.

Rick moaned and Sally rolled her eyes. "Three guesses."

Christa nodded in understanding. "The garage. I see. Think we'll stay here for a bit."

John raised an eyebrow. "He's practicing with the band?"

They all laughed. "That's using the term 'band' loosely." Rick said.

"Very loosely." Sally added.

Christa looked around again. "Where's Fletcher?"

"You'll never guess." Sally sighed.

Christa shook her head. "Not in the garage?"

Sally nodded. "Jeff let him play on the drums."

"We're doomed." Rick added morosely.

They all laughed again. Over the next few hours, John was able to let his guard down and actually relax for the first time in a long time. At one point, Christa's brother started a game of touch football and invited John to join them. He was halfway out the door, when a sharp look from Christa stopped him.

"What?" John asked.

"You're **not** playing football." She told him firmly.

John frowned. "Why not?"

"Two words. Plane crash."

John scowled. "Thanks for reminding me."

Christa's nephew walked into the room, a sad look on his face. "What's wrong honey?" Christa knelt down and asked him.

"My plane won't fly." He held out a roughly made paper airplane.

"Here, let me see that." John took the paper and smoothed it out, then began folding it again. "Try this." He said handing it back to the boy.

Fletcher threw the plane and it soared across the room. "Wow! Thanks Mr. Tracy!"

"John. My father is Mr. Tracy." John smiled as he watched Fletcher run after the plane.

Christa snuggled up to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "You're a pushover, know that?"

John smiled and kissed the top of her head. "I like kids. I mean, with three younger brothers, I don't really have a choice."

Across the room, Meg Lynch nudged her husband. "Look at that." She said softly.

"What?" Jack asked.

"Your daughter. She's in love." Meg told him.

Jack followed her gaze. "How do you know?"

"Just look at her."

"They've only known each other for a few weeks." Jack shook his head. "You're imagining things."

"And we were the same way." She winked at her husband. "He loves her too. He just hasn't figured it out yet." She turned back to the sink.

Before Jack could reply, Jeff burst into the room. "The Thunderbirds are on TV!"

John started, almost dropping his glass of wine, but no one seemed to notice as they rushed into the living room. Christa paused in the doorway when she noticed John wasn't following. "John? You coming?"

John nodded. "Sure." He downed his wine in one swallow and pouring himself another, followed her into the other room.

"They're battling a fire outside of LA." Jeff told them.

"Thunderbirds!" Fletcher yelled, sending his plane soaring again.

John turned his attention to the screen. He couldn't see much behind the reporter, mostly smoke and a large green shape that he knew was Thunderbird 2. _Virgil's probably got the Firefly unloaded. Scott can't fly, so he either stayed home or is working Mobile Control. I hope Dad left Alan at home._

"Turn it up! We can't hear." Meg told her son.

"…_believed to be started by yesterday's fireworks. The fire spread quickly in this drought infested area, and is now creeping towards the residential areas. Local fire crews have been unable to control the blaze. International Rescue was called, and they were able to respond. As you all know, IR has been temporarily shut down since their help in apprehending the international terrorist known as the Hood in Malaysia last month."_

"Guy's a madman. Wish England had capital punishment." Jack muttered. Meg swatted her husband's arm.

_I agree,_ John thought to himself before turning his attention back to the set.

"What's that big green thing?" Sally asked pointing to the TV.

"Thunderbird 2." John replied automatically.

Christa shot him a puzzled look. "How do you know that?"

_Shit…_ "I…um…I mean this isn't the first time they've been on TV." John said quickly.

"Shhhh!" Jeff hissed.

They all turned back to the set. _"It looks like something is happening folks! The IR team seems agitated over something. There's two of them running into a burning building and…oh my God! The building! It down, it's down!"_

Everyone stared at the television screen, even the children sensed now was not the time to talk. _C'mon, where the hell are you. _John felt his heart hammering against his chest.

"_Wait! I see something! It looks like…yes it's a group of firemen. But there is no sign of the International Rescue operatives at this time. Let's pray that they'll be all right."_

John's hand clenched uncontrollably, almost shattering his wine glass. Shaking, he put it down and hurried out of the room. He automatically went for his wrist, belatedly remembering he no longer had his communicator. A wave of nausea washed over him and he fled into the bathroom where he was instantly sick.

There was a knock on the door. "John? Are you alright?"

"C-Christa…yeah…I'm OK. Just give me a minute." He leaned over the sink and splashed cold water on his face. He could feel a headache building, and clenched his eyes shut against it. Finally, when he got his trembling under control, he plastered a smile on his face and opened the door.

"John?" Christa's indigo eyes were filled with concern.

"I'm OK. Must be coming down with something." He told her.

She felt his forehead. "You're a little warm. Want to leave?"

John shook his head. "No, but I will take some aspirin if you've got any."

She slipped into the bathroom and returned a moment later, handing him two white pills and a glass of water. She watched as he swallowed them. "Are you sure you want to stay?"

He nodded. "Yeah, don't make a fuss. I'll be fine." He kissed her on the forehead as she wrapped her arms around him. "So, what happened with the Thunderbirds?" He asked a few minutes later.

Christa took his hand and they started back towards the living room. "They're not saying much. Just confirmed that two members of International Rescue were in the building when it came down. I think they got them out because that big green ship took off towards the UCLA Trauma center."

John shuddered. "Hope they're OK."

"Me too." She smiled up at him. "Go sit down. I'll go find you something to drink."

"Thanks babe." He kissed her tenderly and walked over to the couch. Susie promptly rushed over to him and soon they were both engrossed in a coloring book.

Christa walked back to the kitchen, her forehead furrowed in thought. "Something wrong dear?"

Christa looked up at her mother and shrugged. "John's not feeling well."

"You don't have to stay honey." Meg told her.

"I know, but he wants to." Christa got a glass down from the cupboard and filled it with water

Meg smiled. "What does he do? Where does he work?"

Christa turned back to her mother. "He works for his family. Tracy Enterprises. But he used to work for NASA as an astrophysicist. He said he's been on the ISS."

Now it was Meg's turn to frown. "Really. I thought I knew everyone who had been upstairs. By name anyway. Hmmmm…" She smiled at her daughter. "You're in love with him."

She looked up, her indigo eyes wide. "I am not."

Meg patted her daughter's hand. "Yes, you are."

Christa's eyes got a faraway look. "I've never met anyone like him Mom. He's sweet and shy, and so smart. He knows everything about _everything._ He almost caused a riot at the Museum of Science last week." She laughed remembering. "The lecturer was talking about planetary gasses or something and John kept muttering 'He's wrong. He has no clue what he's talking about.' I finally told him to say something if it was bothering him so much, and he stood up and confronted the man. You should have seen his face when John told him who he was." She laughed again. "Turns out, John was right and he even got the man to admit he was wrong." She got up and stood in the doorway. "Look at him Mom. What kind of guy would patiently sit with his girlfriend's four-year old niece, coloring?"

"If you knew Jeff Tracy, you'd expect nothing less."

"Did you ever meet him? Jeff Tracy?" Christa asked.

Meg shook her head. "I saw him a few times when I was working at Cape Canaveral, but I never got the chance to meet him. Why?"

Christa sat down at the table, her mother sat down next to her. "If someone like Jeff Tracy's son got into a near fatal plane crash, don't you think it would have made the news?"

"Is that what happened to John? I thought he looked thin, but figured he was just a workaholic like his father." Meg frowned in thought. "I suppose if you had as much money as Jeff Tracy, you could pay to keep the whole thing covered up."

Christa sighed. "You're probably right. I never thought of that."

"Honey relax." She ran her hand through her daughter's dark hair. "Take him home. But make sure you both come back and visit again soon."

Christa smiled as she hugged her mother tight. "Thanks Mom."

* * *

A short time later, John and Christa were on the road heading back to Boston. She watched John out of the corner of her eye, noting how quiet he was and that he kept rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Want me to drive?" She asked.

"No thanks." He turned and smiled at her, but she could read the pain in his eyes. "I had a good time. Your niece is a doll."

"Try seeing her when she doesn't get her way. She doesn't have that red hair for nothing."

John chuckled. "My brother Gordon is a red-head. Or he used to be when he was younger. It's darkened to auburn now. He's the prankster of the family. No one and I mean _no one_ is safe. And when he and Alan get together, let's just say I'm glad I'm up on—" He caught himself just in time. "On the mainland most of the time."

"What exactly do you do for Tracy Enterprises?"

John shrugged. "A little of everything. Communications mostly, some research and development. I spend alot of time in the lab."

"I'd guessed that. For a guy who lives on a tropical island, you don't have much of a tan." She teased.

John merely nodded and turned his concentration back to driving. His headache was getting worse and he knew if he didn't get home soon, he'd have to pull over. Waves of nausea threatened to overwhelm him, and he struggled against it. Finally they arrived in front of Christa's apartment. He opened the door for her and walked her upstairs. She ran a hand along his cheek. "You've got a fever. Sure you don't want to stay?"

John shook his head. "I'm going home and head straight for bed." He told her. He pulled her into his arms and she could feel him trembling. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Good night John."

He kissed her softly. "Good night."

Christa watched in concern as he walked down the stairs and faded into the night.


	8. Chapter 8

I don't own Thunderbirds...woe is me! There is some language and adult situations in this chapter, so younger readers be warned.

* * *

Scott and Alan watched as Thunderbird 2 landed a short distance away. The ramp lowered and he could see the Firefly being unloaded. "Mobile Control to Firefly." Scott said into his microphone.

"_Firefly here. What's the situation Scott?"_ Gordon called out.

"The worst of the fires are off to the northwest. I'll send you the co-ordinates."

"_FAB. Firefly out."_

Scott quickly punched in some numbers on the portable computer in front of him. "Alan, where's Dad and Virgil?"

Alan peered down at the screen in front of him. "Dad's over near that burning building and Virgil…Virgil just joined him. They're talking to the firemen."

"Mobile Control to Command." Scott called.

"_This is Command."_

"Op Three is in the Firefly, what's your situation?"

"_Be right with you."_

* * *

Over near the where emergency services had set up their command center, Jeff and Virgil stood talking to the men in charge.

One man shook Jeff's hand and broke into a grin. "Are we ever glad to see you guys."

Jeff smiled, even though he knew the man couldn't see him behind the tinted glass of his helmet. "Happy to help. What can we do?"

The fireman pointed to the building a short distance away. "We were using that building as a shelter when the winds shifted and caught the back end. We think we managed to get everyone out, my people are doing a sweep now. Could you give us a hand putting out the flames?"

"Will do." Jeff pressed a button on his belt. "Command to Firefly."

"_Firefly here."_

"Gordon, we need you over near the shelter. Get these flames under control."

"_FAB. See you in a few."_

"Command to Mobile Control."

"_Mobile Control here."_

"Do a sweep, make sure everyone is out of there." Jeff ordered.

"_FAB." _There was a short pause. _"I'm not reading any…Get them out! The roof's going! Get them out now!"_ Scott hollered across the speaker.

Virgil and Jeff turned as one. Jeff bolted towards the building. "The roof went down. Keep your people back, we'll get the others out." Virgil rushed after his father.

Jeff and Virgil carefully entered the building. "How much further?" Jeff asked, trying to see through the smoke.

"_Another thirty feet or so, around the next corner."_

Jeff and Virgil rounded the corner, meeting up with a group of dazed looking firemen. "Are you alright?" Jeff asked as Virgil began giving the men a quick once over.

One of them nodded. "We're fine…But Billy's still back there!" He started to head back, but Jeff grabbed his arm.

"Let us go. Get the rest of your men out of here before this whole place goes down." Jeff told him.

The man nodded and he and the others started towards the exit. "Scott, tell me what you've got." Jeff ordered.

"_I'm reading a heat signature twelve degrees from your current position. Make it fast Dad, the rest of that place is going to go down any minute."_ Scott answered.

"FAB Scott. Virgil, let's move." They moved through the smoke, occasionally aiming their extinguishers when the flames got too close. Timbers dropped all around them, causing them to duck to avoid getting hit.

"We've got to get out of here Dad!" Virgil called out.

Jeff nodded. "Smoke's getting thicker."

They turned to head back out, when a movement caught Virgil's eye. "Dad! Over there!" He yelled pointing.

Jeff followed his gaze. "I see him." Together they hurried over. "Looks like he's pinned. Give me a hand."

They pushed and shoved the beams off the fallen rescue worker. Finally he was freed. Virgil felt the mans neck. "He's got a pulse and his mask is intact. Let's get out of here." He hefted the man up and threw one arm over his shoulder. Jeff took the other one.

"Right behind you." They started towards the exit. The smoke was worse and going was slow. "I can't see a damned thing." Jeff muttered.

"Language Dad." Virgil teased.

Jeff glared even though he knew Virgil couldn't see it. "Move it smart guy." They slowly made their way forward. Suddenly, the whole place began to shake and burning timbers rained down on them.

"_Dad! Virgil get the hell out of there! Get out now!"_ Scott's voice sounded frantic.

Before either could reply, the ceiling came collapsing down in a fiery crash, burying them all.

* * *

John staggered up the stairs into the house. He sat down at the video phone and with one hand, punched in the number to home. He had the other hand pressed tightly up against his temple and closed his eyes, trying to ease the pain in his head.

"_J-J-John?"_

John's head snapped up. "Brains, I saw the news, what's going on?"

"_We've been trying to re-re-get in touch with you, but your communicator doesn't seem to be w-w-working."_

"I don't have it anymore."

Brains nodded thoughtfully. _"I-I see. There was an a-a-accident. Je-Je-your father and Virgil were caught in a burning building."_

John swallowed thickly. "Where are they?"

"_They're at the UCLA T-T-Trauma Center. Scott is there waiting. G-G-Gordon and Alan brought Thunderbird 2 home. Scott s-s-stayed at the hosp-hosp-medical center." _

John closed his eyes. "What do the docs say?"

Brains shook his head. _"I haven't heard a-anything since Sco—"_

"_You've got some fucking nerve calling here now."_

His brother's face appeared on the screen, pushing Brains out of view. "Gordon. I—"

"_Don't you 'Gordon' me. If you had been here, doing your job like you're supposed to, this wouldn't have happened."_ Gordon's face was an angry red and his brown eyes were filled with hatred.

Headache or not, John wasn't going to take that from his younger brother. His eyes flashed blue fire of their own. "I had nothing to do with this and you know it. Now what's wrong with Dad and Virgil?"

"_What do you care? You made it perfectly clear how you feel about this family."_

"Knock it off Gord."

"_Screw you!"_

John took a deep breath and counted to ten. Then counted to ten again. "Gordon, if you don't tell me what happened, so help me I'll—"

Gordon snorted. _"You'll what John?" _Gordon narrowed his eyes at his brother. _"You want to know what happened? Then come home and find out."_ Without another word, Gordon cut the connection and the screen went dark.

John swore and in one fluid movement, grabbed the vase off the desk and hurled it across the room. A searing pain tore through his head, and blood began to flow from his nose.

"_They don't want you John. This just proves it."_

"Get out of my head!" John yelled, clutching his head in his hands.

"_Your own brother wouldn't even talk to you. Your father is dying John, and they won't tell you."_

"He's not dying! I'm not listening to you!" John staggered to his feet and into the kitchen. He balled a towel up under his nose then moved into the living room. He threw open the door of the liquor cabinet so hard, he tore it off the hinges. He grabbed the first bottle he saw and swallowed the alcohol without bothering with a glass.

"_They don't care about you John."_

"Leave me alone!" He continued drinking until he could no longer hold the bottle and it fell to the floor, empty. Slumping down on the couch, John moaned in anguish. "Just leave me alone…"

* * *

Scott watched as his brother's eyelids fluttered. "Welcome back."

Virgil groaned and opened his eyes. "Where...what…" He rasped.

"Here." Scott leaned forward and placed a straw in Virgil's mouth. His brother nodded gratefully, and took a sip.

"Thanks." Virgil lay back a moment, then took in his surroundings. "What happened?" He asked hoarsely. He brought his hand up to his face, feeling the oxygen tube in his nose.

"No, leave it." Scott told him. "What do you remember?"

"The fire…we were in the shelter looking for that missing fireman. We found him and…" Virgil looked up at his brother. "Is he alright?"

Scott nodded. "A little battered, but fine."

"That's good." He lay back and closed his eyes. Then they snapped open. "Dad! Where's Dad?" He started coughing.

"Easy Virg. He's in another room." Scott wouldn't meet his brother's eyes.

Virgil grew cold. "Scott…."

Scott sighed. "It's not good Vigil. His helmet cracked from the impact of the beams and like you, he swallowed alot of smoke. There was another big beam across his back too. We won't know the full extent of the damage until he wakes up." He said quietly.

Virgil clenched his eyes shut. "I'm sorry. I should have moved faster."

Scott shook his brother. "Don't you dare blame yourself do you hear me Virgil Grissom Tracy!" Virgil stared at his brother in awe. Scott rarely raised his voice. "Now, you just concentrate on getting better so we can get both you and Dad out of here, got me?"

Virgil nodded, still too stunned to reply. Scott settled back in his chair, wincing and Virgil noticed for the first time that his oldest brother wasn't wearing his sling. "Scott? Your shoulder?"

Scott shrugged, carefully. "It's OK Virg. I had to fly TB 1 here, and it's kinda hard to do that one handed."

Virgil frowned as images started coming back to him. "Wait a minute…You! You carried me out! Dammit Scott!"

Scott had to smile, Virgil almost never swore. Even Alan cussed more than Virgil did. "It's OK Virg, I had it looked at." He told his brother.

Virgil relaxed back onto the pillow and closed his eyes. Scott took his younger brother's hand in his. "Sleep Virgil. We'll talk later." He sat there until he was sure Virgil was asleep then got up to see his father.

He moved stiffly, wincing at the pain in his shoulder. He hated lying to his brother, but didn't want to worry him any more than he already was. Plus he didn't want to advertise the fact that yet another member of International Rescue was wounded. Bad for morale.

Scott slowly opened the door to his father's room. The nurse looked up from Jeff's bedside. She smiled and nodded as Scott walked in. "He's still unconscious, but showing signs of coming out of it. I'll let you stay for a while, just call when he wakes." She left the room and Scott sat down in the chair she had just vacated.

He leaned forward, resting his head in his good hand. After a few minutes, he sighed wearily and looked up at his father. Jeff lay still on the hospital bed, his face covered with small cuts and bruises. An oxygen mask covered his nose and mouth and an IV ran into one arm.

Scott took his father's hand in his and squeezed gently. "Come on Dad, it's time to wake up. The others are driving me nuts asking about you." _Well, some of them. We can't find John._ He sighed again. "Dad, if you don't wake up, I'm putting Alan in charge of Thunderbird 3."

Was it his imagination, or did his father's hand twitch. Scott tried again. "And Fermat wants to learn how to pilot Thunderbird 1. With me out of commission for a while, I think it's a good idea."

Definite movement that time. "Dad? Can you hear me?"

"You even think about putting Alan in TB 3, and you're dead." Jeff whispered.

"Dad!" Scott jumped up and leaned over his father.

Jeff slowly opened his eyes. "What happened?" He asked hoarsely.

"You decided to take on a building, and the building won." Scott smiled.

Jeff smiled thinly and started to speak, only to be overtaken by a fit of coughing.

Scott watched his father in concern. "Easy Dad."

Finally the coughing stopped and Jeff lay back, trying to catch his breath. "Virgil…where's…Virgil?"

"He's fine Dad. A little smoke inhalation and some bruises. He's in a room down the hall." He eyed his father critically. "How do you feel?"

"Not sure yet." He shifted a bit and winced. "OK, that hurts." He shifted again and a hiss of pain escaped his lips and he clenched his eyes shut.

"Dad? Dad!" Scott pressed the nurse call button and within moments, a doctor and two nurses came rushing in.

"All right son, let us take a look at him." The doctor said. One of the nurses ushered Scott out into the hall.

He stared for a moment, then paced then scowling paced the length of the hallway. Nearly twenty minutes later, the door opened and the doctor came out. He steered Scott over to a bench against the wall.

"You're colleague will be fine. He's got a deep bruise on is back, but it looks like the pack he was wearing took the brunt of the impact. He'll be very, very sore for quite a while, but I expect a full recovery. We've got him on morphine right now for the pain and he's resting comfortably."

Scott closed his eyes and said a silent prayer of relief before turning back to the doctor. "And his lungs?"

"Again, he should recover in time. I want to keep him here on oxygen for a couple of days just to make sure."

"And Virgil?"

"The same with him. But I would advise him to lay off the cigarettes." Scott frowned and glanced at the door to Virgil's room. The doctor smiled. "Now, you get some rest as well. Security has been posted at all stairwells and elevators. No one can get in here. Go back to your…base and you can come see them both tomorrow. With any luck, you can take them home in a couple of days."

Scott shook the man's hand. "Thank-you doctor. Myself or one of my other colleagues will be back in the morning." After one last look at the doors where his father and brother lay, Scott made his way outside to where Thunderbird 1 was parked. He put on his helmet and waved to the security guards. Climbing into the cockpit, he quickly did a perimeter and systems sweep, then fired up the engines. Within moments, the giant rocket was in the air. He did a perfunctory check for bugs and though the scan came up negative, he arced over Alaska before heading back south to Tracy Island.

Within fifteen minutes, he was landing his 'bird in her silo. As the engines shut down and the locking procedures commenced, Scott glanced down at his watch. It was a little after one in the morning. Scott groaned and rested his head on the yoke closing his eyes. When all was quiet, he got up and walked out onto the catwalk. A sudden dizziness swept over him and he gripped the railing with his good hand to stay upright.

"Scott? You OK?"

Scott opened his eyes and looked into the concerned face of his youngest brother. "Hey there Sprout. Yeah, just worn out." He said tiredly.

"How's Dad? And Virgil?"

"They're both fine. The docs say they can come home in a couple of days." Scott and Alan made their way down the steps to the elevator, Scott filling him in on their father and brother's conditions. "Like I said, they'll be fine. Were you able to get in touch with John?" When Alan didn't answer, Scott looked sharply at his little brother. "Alan, I asked you a question."

_Man, Scott sure sounds like Dad sometimes._ Alan shrugged. "Brains talked to him." He said, avoiding looking at Scott.

Scott waited a moment. "And?"

"And Gordon talked to him too." Alan said quietly.

Scott stopped the elevator and faced his brother. "What happened?"

Alan gulped. "Gord said… He told John that it was John's fault. If he had been here nothing would have happened. Then Gord told John if he wanted to know how Dad and Virgil were, he had to come home and find out."

Scott's eyes grew cold. "Where is Gordon now?" He demanded.

Alan took a step back at Scott's tone. "I-I don't know. Honestly Scott. He disappeared and he's not wearing his communicator."

Scott released the button and the elevator started moving again. When the doors opened, he turned to Alan. "Go to bed Al. I'll see you in the morning." Without a backwards glance, Scott marched to his father's office. He sat down behind the desk and reached for the video phone.

"Master Scott."

Scott jumped. "Jesus Kyrano! You scared the hell out of me!"

"Forgive me." Kyrano stepped out from the shadows. "Your father?"

"He'll be fine. We can bring them both home in a day or three." He ran a shaking hand through his dark hair.

Kyrano smiled. "That is good." He walked over and placed his hand on Scott's shoulder, causing the young man to wince. Kyrano frowned. "You are in pain?" He looked closely at Scott. "Why are you not wearing your sling?"

Scott sighed. "Just haven't gotten the chance to put it on again."

"May I?" Scott nodded. Scott nodded and sucked in a sharp breath when Kyrano probed his shoulder. Kyrano frowned. "You need to have that looked at by a doctor. I fear you have damaged it again."

"Yeah, I figured that out already." He sighed. "I heard there was more trouble between Gord and John?"

Kyrano nodded. "Master Gordon is feeling betrayed by his brother's apparent abandonment."

"John didn't abandon us." Scott said firmly.

"I know that. But Master Gordon doesn't."

Scott sighed wearily and looked up Kyrano. "I don't know what to do Kyrano. I feel like I'm being pulled in a thousand different directions, and soon, I'm going to snap. I understand how Gordon feels, really I do! Part of me is furious at John another is jealous that he got to leave. Virgil's got his music to lose himself into, and Alan has Fermat and Tin-Tin. I'm trying to stay strong for Dad, but I'm not John! I can't take his place!" Scott's head slumped into his hands.

Kyrano laid his hand on Scott's back. "No one is asking you to take his place. You have your own place in this family. No one person can bear the weight of the world on his shoulders Master Scott. Even the mighty Atlas shifted his burden occasionally."

Scott looked up and smiled tiredly. "Thanks Kyrano."

"You are most welcome. Call your brother. He needs to know what has happened to his father and brother." Kyrano frowned for a moment. "Do not be alarmed at his appearance. He too has had a difficult night." And with that cryptic remark the Malaysian man left Scott alone in the room.

_Great, more riddles._ Scott sighed and punched in the number of the brownstone. Within moments, John answered and Scott had to force himself not to comment on his brother's haggard appearance. "John."

"_Scott. How's Dad and Virgil?"_ John asked without preamble.

"They're fine. Or they will be anyway. Smoke inhalation mostly and some bumps and bruises. Dad re-injured his back, but the docs don't think there'll be any permanent damage."

John sighed with relief. _"Thank-God."_

"We tried reaching you by communicator, but the computer couldn't find you. Said the unit was malfunctioning."

To Scott's surprise, John blushed. _"I don't exactly have it anymore."_ At Scott's raised eyebrow, he continued. _"It kinda…fell into the garbage disposal. Must have happened when I was washing the dishes."_

"Yeah, I can see how that would happen." Scott deadpanned.

John smiled, then frowned. _"You look like hell Scotty."_

"Well stay away from a mirror kiddo, 'cause you don't look much better."

"_He tried again. During the rescue…"_ John said quietly.

"Are you alright?"

John nodded. _"I think so."_ He sighed. _"Alan OK?"_

Scott smiled. "He did great. Flew Thunderbird 2 home with Gordon." Scott's smile faded. "What happened with you and Gord?"

"_I don't want to talk about it."_

"John…"

"_Drop it Scott."_ John said firmly.

Scott sighed. "Fine. You two are the biggest pair of idiots I've ever met."

"_Yeah well, you're the eldest of us, so what does that make you?"_

Despite himself, Scott had to grin. "Smart ass." He yawned. "John it's almost two. I'm going to go crash. I'll call you tomorrow OK?"

"_I should be here. Night Scott."_

"Night John-boy." John rolled his eyes and cut the connection. Scott stared at the darkened screen for a minute, then got to his feet and headed to his room. He peeled off his jumpsuit, and with a silent apology to Onaha, he dropped it in a heap on the floor. He padded into the bathroom and stared at the shower for a minute. Then deciding it wasn't worth the effort, he turned back to his room. The painkillers on the sink caught his eye. He opened the bottle and shook two out into his hand. Staring at it a moment, he shook out two more and swallowed them quickly. Then he walked over and sank down onto his bed. Soon, exhaustion, both mental and physical, overtook him and he was fast asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Thunderbirds and its characters do not belong to me, just the ones I made up. Happy reading!

* * *

Christa frowned at the door and pressed the doorbell again. She glared up at the sky from under her umbrella, watching as the rain began to come down harder. She turned back to the door and was just about to give up and go home when the door opened. "It's about time. I was just about to leave." She folded up her umbrella, and shaking it, stepped inside.

"Sorry. I was taking a nap." John said hoarsely.

Christa looked up at him. "Still not feeling well?" She asked, placing her hand on his forehead.

He shook his head and started to reply, only to be cut off by a fit of coughing. He groaned and leaned against the doorframe, one hand on his head, the other pressed up against his ribs.

She frowned. "We're not going anywhere tonight." She said matter-of-factly.

"Christa, I'm fine. It's just a cold." John protested, sneezing.

"That may be, but it's wet and rainy out there, and I'm not risking pneumonia." She stood firm, her hands on her hips. "The only place you're going is bed."

John grinned and his blue eyes twinkled. "Maybe you should come with me and we could play doctor."

Despite herself, she had to smile back. "Nice try pal." She kissed him on the lips, at the same time swatting his behind. "Now go put something comfy on, and I'll order us some take-out. Any preferences?"

John thought a minute. "How about Chinese? I think there's a menu in the kitchen somewhere."

"I'll find it. Go change." She watched as John made his way up the stairs, stopping once for a coughing fit. She frowned and grabbing her bag, ducked into the bathroom and quickly changed out of her scrubs, putting on a more comfortable pair of flannel pants and an oversized sweatshirt. Making her way back to the kitchen she turned on the light and stopped dead.

There taped to the refrigerator door, was the picture Susie had drawn a few days ago. It was hard to tell exactly what most of the picture was, but she could clearly make out the two stick figures, one taller, topped in yellow, the other much smaller, in red. Christa's heart melted.

"Hey, find the menu?"

Christa turned to see John standing in the doorway. He too had put on a pair of flannels and wore a faded MIT sweatshirt. His hair was mussed, and his sleepy looking eyes were a startling blue against his pale features. She walked over to him and pulled him down, fastening her lips on his and kissing him tenderly. When they broke apart, her indigo eyes glistened with tears.

"What was that for?" He asked softly.

"I have to tell you something, and I don't want you to say a word. Just listen." She stared deeply into his blue eyes. "I love you." John started and opened his mouth to speak, but Christa placed her finger across his lips. "Shhh! Don't say anything. You don't have to say it back to me." She kissed him again. "I just wanted you to know."

John took her into his arms and rested his head on top of hers. They stood that way, content with each other until John coughed again. "Great way to…ruin a moment John." He rasped.

Christa smiled. "Go pick out a movie. I'll order dinner."

An hour later, they were snuggled together on the couch, the remains of their dinner in boxes on the coffee table. John had started a fire, and they talked quietly while watching the movie.

"You couldn't have put in something romantic?" Christa asked.

"What's wrong with 'Apollo 13'?" John replied.

Christa rolled her eyes. "A bunch of guys, traveling through space in nothing more than a tin-foil box. Really heartwarming."

"Hey, it was a scary time. These guys were pioneers."

Christa just groaned and settled herself back against John's chest as they watched the movie. At one point, she felt John tense up. "What is it?" She turned to see him frowning at the screen.

"Huh, I never noticed that before." He said, staring intently at the screen.

"Never noticed what?"

"See that guy? The one playing astronaut Fred Haise? He looks alot like my Dad."

Christa turned to look. "Yeah, then you have one hot Dad." She grinned.

John frowned at her. "Nice. I'll be sure to tell him that next time we talk." With one last look back at the movie, he snorted and settled back, taking her in his arms.

John was just starting to doze off when the phone buzzed. "I'll be right back." He got up and answered it. "Hello?" Christa watched as he frowned. "Who's going to get them?" Another pause. "He shouldn't be flying…Bite me Alan." But he said it with a smile. "Have Dad call when he gets settled…You too Sprout. Bye."

"Who was that?" Christa asked when John had finished.

He looked up. "Oh, my little brother."

"Which one?"

"The youngest, Alan."

"Everything alright?"

John nodded. "Yeah, my father has been away on business and is coming home tonight or tomorrow. My brother Scott is flying to get him."

She noticed the frown on his face. "What's wrong with that? I thought you told me he was a pilot?"

"He is. He…fell a few weeks ago and cracked his collarbone. He's supposed to be keeping it immobile."

"I see. So stubbornness seems to run in the family." She frowned as John coughed and swayed dizzily for a moment. She walked over and took his hand. "Honey?"

He brought one hand up to his head. "Want to call it a night?" He asked tiredly.

"Sure." Hand in hand they went upstairs. Christa rummaged in her bag and pulled out a prescription bottle. "Here take these." She said, handing John two pills.

"What is it?"

"Tylenol with codeine. It'll help you feel better."

John eyed the pills skeptically. "How did you get them?"

Christa rolled her eyes. "Welcome to the twenty-first century John. Nurses have been able to prescribe meds for the past ten years." She said as she went into the bathroom.

John blushed and swallowed the pills. Pulling off his sweatshirt, he climbed into bed. A moment later, Christa had joined him. She had changed her flannels to a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. John smiled at her petite form hidden under his shirt. She crawled into bed and snuggled up next to him. "You're awfully hot. Want me to leave?" She asked.

He tightened his arms around her in response. "No. Stay…Please." She smiled and held his hands tightly in hers. After a while his breathing steadied out as he fell asleep.

"I love you." She whispered into the dark, closing her eyes. They snapped open again at the sound of John's voice.

"I love you too."

* * *

Scott grumbled to himself as he went in search of his brother. Gordon had been avoiding him for nearly a day now, and Scott had long passed the merely annoyed stage. He kept catching his younger brother out of the corner of his eye, but when he tried to pin him down, Gordon had disappeared.

_I'll have to corner the little bastard on his own turf._ Scott marched down the hallway to their rooms. He paused in front of Gordon's door. "Gordon?" He knocked. There was no answer. "Gordon, open the door." He pounded on the door with his good hand. "Gordon Cooper Tracy, OPEN THIS DOOR!

"He's n-n-not there."

Scott turned to see Fermat standing there. "Where is he?"

Fermat shrugged. "H-H-He was at the pool, but l-left. I was lo-lo-lo-trying to find Alan."

"He's in the kitchen. Onaha made brownies." Scott smiled.

"T-T-Thanks Scott!" Fermat started to dash down the hall.

Scott watched him go, then got an idea. "Fermat! Wait!" The young man turned. "Can you open this door?"

Fermat nodded. "Sure. But I-I-I'm not suppose—"

* * *

"I'll take full responsibility. Open the door."

Gordon congratulated himself on successfully avoiding his eldest brother once again. Although he knew the impeding confrontation was inevitable, Gordon was willing to put it off as long as he could. He heard the roar of the jet and smiled, knowing Scott was headed to California to pick up Virgil and their father. He exited the tiny cave he had been hiding in and watched as the jet disappeared into the distance, then began the long trek back to the house. He smelled brownies and started towards the kitchen, but hearing the voices of Alan and his friends, made him turn towards his room instead.

He opened the door and stepped inside, preparing to head for the shower, when the voice he had been dreading stopped him.

"I've been looking for you."

Gordon froze, then turned. Scott was lying sprawled on the bed, his arm once again immobilized in a black sling. Gordon smiled charmingly. "Scotty, I thought you left to go get Dad. How're you feeling?"

"I sent Kyrano and I'm fine Gordon. Whether you will be, remains to be seen." Scott's tone was as cold as ice.

Gordon backed up towards the door. "Don't even think about it." Scott growled. He got to his feet and marched over to his brother. Gordon backed up until he hit the wall. "What did you say to John?"

Gordon swallowed. "N-N-Nothing."

"Gordon."

Gordon took a deep breath, then looked his brother square in the eye. "I told him he didn't deserve to know what happened. He's the one who chose not to be part of us any more. Why should he know about Dad and Virgil?"

Scott's eyes narrowed. "You just had to open your God-damned mouth again, didn't you?"

Gordon gave his brother a shove and paced the room. "So what if I did? John's being a jerk. He left us Scott! He doesn't care what happens to any of us anymore!"

"That's bullshit and you know it."

"Is it Scott! He's off gallivanting in Boston, while the rest of us are working our tails off. He's not even around to fix his own 'bird! We're stuck doing that too!"

"Shut up Gordon."

"No! I won't shut up!" Gordon was yelling now. "We've all been tiptoeing around John since this all started in April. Maybe Dad was right, he_ is_ incompetent and useless! Alan was the one who was kidnapped! You don't see him acting like a pathetic nutcase!"

Scott acted instinctively and slapped hard Gordon across the face. Gordon fell backwards onto his bed, and lay there, staring up at his brother in shock and surprise. "**You. Weren't. There.**" Scott spoke slowly and deliberately. "You didn't see his face, feel him shaking as he relived the whole fucking attack. You didn't hold him after he was sick, or watch him trying not to fall asleep because of the nightmares that are still haunting him."

Gordon struggled to get up, but at a sharp look from his brother, settled back in a sitting position. Scott went on. "John was up there **alone **Gordon. Hurt and scared. He knew communications were out. He had no idea if we had got the message or not. And he knew the instant before the attack that it had been a missile and he had possibly called us to our deaths." His grey eyes bored into Gordon's brown ones. "Two hours Gordon. It took us two hours for us to get to him. How would you have felt, lying on the floor, bleeding, burned, wondering when the next missile was going to come and finish you off. Or worse, watching it take out the family that **you** called for help."

"And then when we landed in London, not even remembering how hurt he was. He had to go to a damned paramedic for help because his own family had forgotten about him, _again_!" Gordon started to speak, but Scott held up a hand to stem his protest. "And before you say anything, yes, I'm as much to blame for that as the rest of us."

Gordon finally found his voice. "That doesn't give him the right to act the way he has been. That doesn't give him the right to just leave." His voice wavered slightly, and he blinked furiously at the tears that threatened.

"No it doesn't." Scott said, the venom gone from his voice. "But John isn't exactly acting on his own."

Gordon frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Scott sighed wearily and ran his good hand through his hair. "John is still being…attacked for lack of a better word."

"By who?" Gordon's eyes opened wide with realization, and he shook his head. "No, no way! He's locked up!"

Scott nodded. "Yes Gord. Hood's messing with him, and might have been for a long time now. He's planted doubts and thoughts in John's mind so subtly that John doesn't even know which thoughts are his own anymore."

"How did you find out?"

"Tin-Tin. She can sense Hood's attacks. She was even able to help John this last time."

Now Gordon got up. "What last time? What happened?" He demanded.

Scott looked hard at his brother. "The Hood attacked John after he called home trying to find out what happened to his brother and father." He said, fiercely quiet.

Gordon went pale. "No…I never meant…I didn't know!"

"Maybe you should start thinking before you run off at the mouth. Like you said to John, the world doesn't revolve around you. Think about it." Scott marched out the door, leaving a stunned Gordon in the middle of the room.

Gordon stood there a minute, then he dropped down on the bed, his head in his hands.


	10. Chapter 10

No, it's not an April Fool's joke. Posted early, just because I can!

Thanks to my anonymous reviewers for your support. Glad everyone is enjoying this.

* * *

John sat up, his heart beating wildly. With a shaking hand, he wiped the sweat off his forehead. Glancing at Christa next to him, he carefully got out of bed and pulling on his shirt, went downstairs.

He made his way to the living room, and stopped in front of the liquor cabinet. _Just a small one, to help me get back to sleep._ He poured himself a shot of whiskey, then sat back on the couch. He downed the drink in one swallow, which would have been more impressive if he hadn't erupted in a coughing fit at the same time.

He groaned and put his head in his hands.

"_If they had really wanted you to know, they would have found you."_

"Shut up. You're not here."

"_But I am here John. And your family is not."_

"Leave me alone."

"_You are alone John. No family, no one. Alone. Just like on Thunderbird 5."_

John threw his glass across the room, where it hit the wall and shattered. "Get out of my head!"

"_They could be right you know. Maybe you are going crazy."_

John got to his feet and started up the stairs. "I'm not listening to this. I'm not listening to you!"

"_Perhaps this will help."_

John nearly screamed as the pain tore through his head. He fell to his knees, hands clutched to his temples. "No…please no…" He moaned.

* * *

Christa had awakenedwhen John had crept out of bed. She lay still listening for him and had just gotten up herself when she heard the crash. She hurried down the stairs, and heard John's cry. As she came to the bottom, she was stunned at the sight before her.

John was on his knees, rocking back and forth. He had one hand pressed to his head and the other trying to stop the blood flowing from his nose.

"John!" She rushed to his side.

He looked up at her with haunted eyes. "Christa…make him stop…please make him stop."

"Stay here! I'll be right back!" She rushed into the guest bathroom and grabbed a towel. She ran it under the cold water, and grabbing another one ran back to John. She pressed the cold towel to the back of his neck and the other under his nose. "Relax honey. Just relax."

John shook his head. "No…can't…." He burst out coughing again.

"I'm calling an ambulance." Christa started to get up, but John grabbed her by the wrist.

"No…I'll be alright…Just need—" His voice cut off as he moaned and gripped his head again. "Oh God…"

"John! I can't help you if you don't tell me what to do!" She said desperately.

He looked up at her, his blue eyes filled with pain. "My family…Tin-Tin…" He moaned again.

"John…"

"Call them…the office…please…" John clenched his eyes shut. "Get out! Leave me alone! Christa…help me…please…"

Christa bolted to her feet and ran to the office. Spying the video-phone, she quickly hit the redial button, praying it would connect to his family. She could hear John moaning in the hallway. "Hold on John! I'm calling!" She turned back to the screen. "Dammit someone answer!" Just then, a man's face came on. "Wow! John was right!" She shook her head. "What am I doing…Mr. Tracy?"

Jeff nodded. _"I'm Jeff Tracy. Who are you?"_ He asked warily.

"My name is Christa Lynch. I'm a friend of John's. He told me to call. He told me he needed you and something called Tin-Tin."

Jeff frowned. _"Where is John?"_

"Please sir! He's sick. I'm not sure—" She turned as she heard a crash behind her. John had stumbled into the room and fell to his knees again. "John!" She rushed to his side.

"Need…Tin-Tin…" He moaned.

Christa helped him to the desk chair, only then becoming aware of Jeff yelling through the video phone.

"_What is God's name is going on there? John?...JOHN!"_

"Dad…I need Tin-Tin…" He clenched his eyes shut again. "No!" Blood began pouring out his nose again.

Christa turned to the screen. "Do you know what he's talking about?"

Jeff nodded. _"She's on her way. Stay with us John!"_

"I'm calling an ambulance." Christa started towards the landline phone.

"_No!"_

"No!" Both John and Jeff yelled at the same time. "Christa…please…"

"_John!"_

They both looked up at the screen. "Tin-Tin…he's here…please help me…" John pleaded.

Christa watched as the girl closed her eyes, and gripped a crystal around her neck. John too closed his eyes. Long minutes dragged, then John slumped forward on the desk, on the screen, the girl fell back into the arms of someone Christa couldn't see. "John?" She knelt next to him, feeling for a pulse. It was wild and erratic, but there. She breathed a sigh of relief.

"_How is he?"_

Christa looked up at the screen again to see John's father. "He's alright… I think. What the hell was that all about?" She demanded.

Jeff shook his head. _"I'm not sure myself. John, can you hear me?"_

John looked up, his face streaked with tears and blood. "Dad, you're home…" He rasped hoarsely.

Jeff smiled. _"And in one piece, more or less. Which is more than I can say for you."_ His smile faded. _"I'm coming out there."_

John shook his head. "No Dad, I'll…be alright. I'll call you later."

"_John…"_

"I promise."

Jeff sighed. _"Christa is it?" _She nodded. _"Thank-you."_

"I'm not really sure what you're thanking me for sir." She told him.

Jeff smiled. _"To tell the truth, I don't either. You're a nurse?" _She nodded._ "Can you give him something to help him sleep?"_

"Yes. I have a mild sedative in my bag. I'll go—"

"NO!" They both looked up at John. "No. He can get in easier…when I sleep." He said, more to Jeff.

Jeff's eyes widened, then filled with concern. _"John…I can be there by midday."_

John shook his head again, wincing. "No Dad, please. I'll call you."

Jeff sighed. _"All right. But if I don't hear from you by tomorrow, I'm on my way."_

"Talk to you then Dad…Thanks." John said softly.

"_Rest son. Christa."_ Jeff nodded then the screen went dark.

Christa waited a few moments then turned to John. "Want to tell me what that was all about?" She wasn't sure if she was more worried or angry.

"Christa…" His blue eyes were filled with pain.

Her anger melted away. "C'mon, let's get you cleaned up." She helped him to his feet, and up the stairs to his room. She carefully peeled off his blood covered sweatshirt. "Feel up to taking a shower?" He nodded and she helped him into the bathroom. After turning on the water, she left him to get in, and went to sit on the window seat, staring up at the rain pattering against the window. A noise from the bath startled her and she hurried in to find John half out of the shower, gripping the wall for support. She quickly turned off the water and wrapped a towel around his waist. He smiled gratefully as she led him to the bed. She handed him a clean pair of pants and a shirt, and watched as he collapsed onto the pillows. She sat next to him, gently running his fingers through his hair. "Can I get you anything?" She asked softly.

He smiled thinly. "No, just don't leave. Please don't leave me." He coughed, his hands moving automatically to his left side.

"Are you sure you don't want anything for the pain?"

He shook his head. "No." He cracked an eye open. "Christa?"

"Yes John?"

"I…I'm glad you're here." He whispered.

She turned off the lamp and lay down next to him. "I'll be here as long as you need me John. I'm not going anywhere."

He wrapped his arms around her. "I love you." He said quietly.

She rolled over and gently rubbed his head, until the pain lines around his eyes started to fade. "I'll never leave you."

* * *

Far away, in a London prison cell, the Hood smiled evilly, his red eyes glittering in pleasure. _Soon, John. You'll be mine, all mine._

* * *

Jeff turned to face his sons and his friends. "Somebody better explain to me what the hell just happened." He said, his tone like steel.

No one answered, but Alan and Gordon both glanced up at Scott. Scott straightened and took a deep breath. "Alan, is she alright?" He asked.

Alan nodded and looked down at Tin-Tin who was just starting to stir. Kyrano had his hand on his daughter's forehead and he smiled. "She is fine. As is John. For now."

"I shall go get us all something to drink." Onaha cast one last look at her daughter and husband, and hurried from the room.

"I-I-I think I'll go help." Brains steered himself and Fermat out of the room.

Virgil shrugged and sat down on the couch. "Don't look at me." He said, his voice still hoarse from the smoke.

"Scott, what happened?" Jeff asked.

Scott sat down, wincing, in a chair. Virgil frowned at him, but Scott seemed not to notice. "I couldn't sleep, and was headed for the kitchen for something to drink. I ran into Tin-Tin and she told me she knew something was wrong with John. Alan heard us talking and we put in a call to Boston. There was no answer. Next think I know, Tin-Tin is doing…something and a few minutes later the phone rings. It's John telling me he's alright."

Jeff narrowed his eyes at his oldest. "When did this happen?"

"Right before the Fourth."

"And you didn't tell me?"

Scott sighed. "I never really got the chance Dad. The rescue call came in just as I was starting. Then with you and Virgil getting hurt…"

Jeff nodded. "All right then. Tin-Tin, what just happened?"

The young Malaysian girl was sitting up, leaning against Alan. "My uncle…the Hood attacked again."

Jeff shook his head. "What do you mean by attack?"

Tin-Tin looked down for a moment, and Alan squeezed her shoulder in reassurance. "The Hood has gotten into John's mind. He is torturing him with both pain and thoughts. He is warping John's memories, trying to turn him against us, against you."

"How do you know? Did John talk to you?" Jeff asked, confused.

Tin-Tin shook her head. "I can hear them." She said quietly.

"What?" Virgil looked up in surprise.

Alan looked at his father. "It's true Dad. She can hear John sometimes. Especially if he's thinking too loudly." He winked at Tin-Tin and she smiled back.

Jeff got stiffly to his feet and shook his head. "Wait, let me try and understand this. You can _hear_ the Hood?"

Tin-Tin nodded. "Sometimes. Like when he's…attacking John. I can hear John crying for help."

"How does it work? Your powers?" Jeff asked.

Tin-Tin shrugged. "I'm not really sure. I'm still learning. But John has a strong mind. If he can find the courage to stand up to my uncle, he will be able to defeat him."

Virgil got to his feet. "Then what are we waiting for? We should go to Boston and bring him back."

Scott shook his head. "No. John needs to do this on his own."

"That's crap and you know it!" Virgil shouted.

Jeff held up his hands. "Boys, enough. Virgil, much as I hate to say this, I agree with Scott. John can do this, we know he can. If we rush to his side, he'll assume it's out of pity, that once again we don't believe in him."

Virgil shook his head. "You really do hate him don't you?" He said, his voice deadly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Jeff glared.

"You were in such a hurry to get him back up to Thunderbird 5 after the first attack, then just let him fly off to Boston, still injured and needing care." Virgil's hazel eyes glittered angrily.

"Watch your tone with me Virgil. I did nothing of the sort. What was I supposed to do? Chain him to the wall? Your brother made his own choice, and in the effort not to lose him forever, I let him go." Jeff replied his voice cool.

Virgil shook his head. "That's bullshit!" Everyone started. Virgil marched over and stood toe to toe with his father. "You got rid of him. Instead of helping him, you got rid of him. And managed to lose Penny at the same time! Well fuck you Dad. Fuck all of you." Virgil turned on his heels and marched out the door, leaving his family speechless.

Jeff turned to a grinning Gordon. "What are you laughing at?" He growled.

Gordon wiped the smile from his face. "Nothing at all sir." He said solemnly.

Jeff glared for a moment longer, then turned to stare out the window. "Leave me alone. All of you."

Gordon glanced at Scott, who shrugged, then both left the room. Alan helped Tin-Tin to her feet and they followed close behind.

Kyrano placed his hand on his friend's shoulder. "I will be here if you need me."

Jeff didn't answer, merely nodded his head and stood staring out at the sea.

* * *

Gordon sat by the edge of the pool, idly dangling his feet in the water. The sun was starting to set and he sighed. He heard footsteps behind him, and recognized them as Alan's. He figured his little brother would see him and turn back into the house, so Gordon was surprised when Alan sat down next to him.

"Hey." Alan said quietly.

"Hey."

"That was…intense."

"Yeah."

They sat quietly for a few minutes, the only sounds being the birds and the splash of the pool water.

"Did you know Scott was afraid of mice?"

"No." Gordon looked up at his little brother. "He is?"

Alan nodded. "Terrified, absolutely terrified."

Gordon broke into a grin, and a moment later he and Alan got up and together hurried into the house.


	11. Chapter 11

With the exception of the ones I made up, I don't own these guys. Thanks and enjoy!

* * *

John made his way, yawning into the kitchen. "Hey! I thought you had to work today?" He said, coming up behind Christa and placing a kiss on the top of her head.

"Is that all I get?" She teased. John responded by kissing her deeply, leaving her breathless. "Well…that's more like it." She smiled. "Sit down I made breakfast."

John sat down at the table, and Christa placed a mug of hot cocoa in front of him. "Thanks. You didn't answer my question."

"Do you really think I was going to leave you alone after what happened last night?" He looked down and avoided her eyes. She smiled and lifted his head to look at her. "I love you." She kissed him softly on the forehead. "Hmmm, you don't feel as warm. Fever's breaking."

"Actually, I took a couple of aspirin before I got in the shower." He watched as she puttered around the kitchen, a feeling of contentment washing over him. _Having her here just feels…right somehow._ He sighed. "Christa?"

"Hmmm?" She replied without turning from the stove.

"You don't have to cook for me."

"Yes I do. I've seen you make toast." She laughed. "Relax, I like cooking. And it's more fun to do it for someone besides myself for a change."

They were quiet a few minutes, the only sound being the rain pattering against the windows. "Another rainy day." Christa mused.

"I guess so." John swallowed. "Christa, I've been thinking. Wouldn't it be easier for you to just…keep some stuff here? I mean, it's closer to work and I could pick you up after your shift if you wanted to… I mean if you wanted me to…aww crap, I'm no good at this…" He muttered looking down into his cup.

Christa grinned. "Why John Tracy, are you asking me to move in with you?"

John looked up, his eyes wide, a blush creeping over his face. "No, yes…oh hell, just forget it."

She walked over and nudged his arms aside so she could sit in his lap. "John?" He looked up, his face still pink. She ran her fingers through his hair. "I'd love to." She kissed him gently. "In fact, I was trying to think of a way of asking you without freaking you out."

"Takes more than that to freak me out." John smiled.

"I'll have to remember that." She got up and turned off the stove, placing an omelet in front of John. "Eat up before it gets cold." She poured herself a cup of coffee and placed the dishes in the dishwasher, all the while chatting easily with John.

"That was great Christa. Thanks." He got up and put his plate in the sink. "What do you want to do today?"

Christa looked at him, her indigo eyes wide with disbelief. "_You're_ not doing anything! Do you not remember last night?"

John closed his eyes and took a shuddering breath. "I remember it fine." He said softly.

"Then maybe you can explain to me what that was all about."

John shook his head. "I…I can't."

"What do you mean you can't? John I thought you were dying last night! I think I deserve some kind of explanation!"

"It was just a nightmare."

"Bull. That was no nightmare. That was a seizure."

John turned to look out the window. "Christa, I can't tell you. It has to do with…with my work."

"That…attack you had was something to do with your work?" Christa snorted. "I'm not stupid John."

"I never said you were."

"Then give me a little credit here." Christa marched over and faced him. "You kept saying 'Help me, make him leave me alone'. Who did you mean? Your father?" John shook his head. "Then who? John talk to me!"

"Christa I can't OK! I just can't!" He turned and fled out of the kitchen. A moment later she heard the front door slam.

Rushing to the window, she saw him walking quickly up the sidewalk. _At least he was smart enough to put on a jacket._ Then sighing to herself, she finished cleaning up the breakfast dishes and sat down in the living room to wait until he returned.

* * *

John stalked down the street, belatedly noticing that the jacket he had grabbed was his new leather one, which thanks to the rain, was now ruined. That realization and the rain trickling down his neck, made his already black mood even darker.

He continued to walk aimlessly, until finally he stopped to catch his breath and take in his surroundings. Somehow he'd managed to end up in the North End. And a rather unsavory area of the North End at that. Spying a seedy bar on the corner, he broke into a light jog and went inside. The interior of the establishment matched his outlook on life, drab and lonely, the only bright part being Christa.

Shaking his head to get her image out of his mind, he walked up to the bar. "Whiskey, straight." He said to the bartender.

The man poured a shot of the amber liquid into a glass and handed it to John. He downed it in one swallow. The cheap liquor burned as it went down his throat, causing him to cough and his eyes to water. "Again." John said hoarsely. The second went down as quickly as the first, and John motioned for another. "Just leave the bottle."

"How about you pay for it first." The bartender drawled.

John fished out his wallet and threw a hundred dollar bill on the bar. "That cover it?" The man nodded and the bill disappeared into his pocket.

John was nearly half-way through the bottle when he finally noticed the rumblings around him. He spied one of the bar's occupants staggering towards him, and right before the man would have crashed into him, John stepped back. The man fell forward, right on his face. He got to his feet in an instant, glaring at John. John grinned. "Gotta be careful. The floor's kinda slippery."

The man snarled. "We don't need no pretty boys hanging around here, so why don't you just get out."

John shrugged. "I'm not finished my drink."

"I think you are."

"Whatever." John turned back to the bar, seemingly ignoring the man. The man lunged towards John again, and John neatly side-stepped and the man went flying over the bar, crashing into the bottles lined up behind it. He groaned once, then lay still.

John turned to face the crowd which had gathered around him. "Anyone else want to give it a try?" He said calmly.

The bartender tried to interject. "Hey, no fighting! Take it outside."

"It's raining outside Tony. Don't worry, this won't take long." Another man, this one even taller than the first advanced on John. "You're gonna pay for what you did to Donny, pretty boy."

John met the man's gaze unflinchingly. "I'm shaking in my boots."

The man swung his fist at John's head. John ducked, at the same time aiming an uppercut of his own at the thug's stomach. It was like hitting a brick wall. John staggered back, clutching his right hand. The man leered. "Time to teach you a lesson pretty boy." He raised his fist again, but this time John was ready and feinted to the left, at the same time bringing his whiskey bottle down on the man's head. He went down as hard as his friend did.

John grinned ferally. "Who's next?"

This seemed to be the signal for the rest of the bar's occupants to move in. John eyed them warily, waiting for them to make the first move. Out of the corner of his eye, he spied the bartender picking up the phone, but knew this would be over long before the police could get here.

One man, this one skinny and long haired rushed John. Without missing a beat, John swung his leg in a roundhouse kick, dropping the man instantly. Two more surged forward and John was able to take down one of them with another well placed kick. The second managed to get a hard punch into John's ribs and he gasped with pain. He staggered back, falling over one of the prone bodies on the floor. It turned out to be for the better, as John was able to grab the ankle of his attacker and flip him to the floor. John scrambled to his feet and with another sharp kick, sent the man into dreamland.

By now the bar had erupted in chaos as the men tried to take down John. For his part, John felt as if he was acting independently of his body. His mind registered what was happening, but his body was seemingly on its own. He lashed out at anyone who came close, managing to hold most of them back. One was able to get in close and grabbing John by the shoulders, rammed him against the wall. John's head came into contact with the wall, and everything dimmed for a moment. He shook it off and eluded the next blow, taking the man down. Two more followed suit.

Finally the constant pain in his chest slowed him down and he found himself backed up against the same wall. The man in front of him pulled out a knife and grinning hugely, slowly slashed it back and forth.

"You're mine now pretty boy." He leered.

John gulped, his eyes darting around, trying to find an escape. There was none. He was gasping for breath, and his vision started dimming around the edges. "Sorry, you're…not really my type." He shook his head, trying to clear it.

The man scowled. "Let's take care of those pretty boy looks right now." The man leapt forward, his blade flashing. John spun, trying to evade the knife but the man was too quick.

John cried out as the blade cut through his jacket, slicing into his upper left arm. John fell to his knees, clutching at his arm, waiting for the final blow. It never came.

"**POLICE! EVERYBODY FREEZE!"**

John breathed a sigh of relief. He staggered to his feet, just as the bar spun around him.

"Hey buddy, you OK?"

John heard the voice but was having trouble focusing on where it was coming from. "Buddy?"

"Jesus! He's been cut. Call an ambulance!"

John tried to protest, but everything grayed out. "Watch it! He's going down!" John felt arms around him, carefully lowering him to the floor before everything went dark.

* * *

Virgil bolted upright out of a sound sleep at the sound of the scream. Realizing it had come from his brother Scott's room, he tore across the room and opened the door. "Scott!"

Scott burst from his room, clad only in a towel, his face red with anger. "I'll kill the little bastard." He growled.

Realization dawned. _Gordon._ "Better get some clothes on first." Virgil quipped and ducked back into his own room. Yawning, he stretched his arms over his head. _Guess I might as well get up._ Virgil stepped into the shower, and let the scalding water run over him. _Wonder what the little punk did to Scott this time. _He laughed to himself as he rinsed his hair. _Glad it wasn't me._ Stepping out a few minutes later, he quickly ran some gel through his hair, styling it as usual, then got dressed and headed to the kitchen to get some breakfast.

Onaha smiled as he entered. "Good morning!"

"Morning Onaha. Lovely day!" Virgil smiled back and poured himself a cup of coffee.

She stopped for a minute and stared at him. "Yes it is indeed." She said finally.

Scott was sitting at the table, a cup of coffee in front of him. He scowled, not looking up. "Yeah, wonderful."

"So, what did he do?" Virgil asked, sitting down in front of his brother. Scott merely scowled again. "C'mon bro. Spill it." Scott mumbled something Virgil couldn't hear. "Speak up, not all of us have super hearing."

"He put fake mice in my shower."

Virgil looked baffled for a moment, then burst out laughing. Scott looked up, frowning, then the frown turned to a smile as he gazed at his brother.

Finally, Virgil stopped laughing and noticed his brother's smile. "See, even you have to admit, it's kind of funny. Lighten up."

Scott, still grinning, shook his head. "You obviously haven't looked in a mirror this morning have you?"

Now it was Virgil's turn to frown. "Yes I have, I just got out of the shower."

"Look again."

Virgil frowned for a moment, then walked over to look at his reflection in the toaster. "The little creep! It's green!"

"He probably thought it would compliment Thunderbird 2." Scott deadpanned.

Virgil glared at his oldest brother. "He couldn't have done this alone."

Scott shook his head. "Nope. Looks like the two of them have kissed and made up."

"Terrific…" Virgil slumped down on the table. The he looked up with an evil grin on his face. "Want to go after them together?"

Scott's grin matched his brother's. "I'd love to."


	12. Chapter 12

Don't own 'em, except for the ones I made up, so please don't sue!

* * *

John looked up and groaned as he saw Christa walk up to the main desk of the Emergency Room. "How did _she_ find out?" He asked no one in particular.

The nurse attending him followed his gaze. "Your next of kin?" She asked as she finished bandaging his arm.

"Kind of. Just not sure who called her." He replied.

"Do you carry a cell phone?" John nodded. "That's how. They dialed the last number called when you were brought in unconscious. It's standard policy." She told him, adjusting the icepack on his hand.

"Terrific." He muttered, then pasted a smile on his face as Christa marched over to him. "Hi babe."

"Don't babe me. Can I see his chart?" Christa asked, flashing her hospital ID. The nurse handed it to her.

"Keep the ice on that hand. I'll be back in a few minutes Mr. Tracy." The nurse told him, walking away.

"I'm not going anywhere." John sighed. "Well, what's the prognosis?"

Christa glared at him. "A bar fight? You got into a bar fight in the North End? How stupid are you?"

John frowned. "Back off." He growled. "This isn't the place."

She glared back and continued reading his chart. "Chest contusions with a possible fracture, they're still waiting on the X-rays. Dammit John!"

"Christa…"

"Don't! Don't say anything! I'm going to go push those X-rays through." She pointed a finger at him, her indigo eyes bright with anger. "Don't you dare move do you hear me?" Without waiting for an answer, she marched off.

"Like I have any choice." John sighed.

"Excuse me, Mr. Tracy?" John looked up as the police officer walked towards him. "I'm Sergeant Mike Evans. Can I talk to you a minute?"

John nodded warily. "Am I under arrest?"

"No sir. The bar's owner and several of the patrons said you were attacked first and only defending yourself."

John sighed. "That's something."

"Plus, we ran your ID, and you've got no priors, not to mention the fact of who you are. Jeff Tracy's son."

"Jeff Tracy's son." John said it at the same time.

The policeman smiled. "Get that alot do you?" Then he sobered. "Mr. Tracy, do you intend to press charges?"

Christa had appeared again. "Of course he does."

John held up his hand, then winced. "Christa. No Sergeant. I think I'd just like to forget this whole thing ever happened."

The officer looked skeptical. "Are you sure sir?"

John nodded. "Will you be talking to the owner?"

"Yes, we've got to go back there and finish things up."

John, wincing again, pulled out his wallet and handed the officer a business card. "Please extend my apologies, and give him this. Tell him not to report this to his insurance, just send all the bills to that address. I'll take care of it."

The officer looked down at the card. "That's very generous of you sir."

"Least I could do. And please, it's John." He held out his good hand.

Sergeant Evans smiled. "Mike. Take care of yourself."

"I will thanks."

The officer started to walk off, the paused. "Oh and John? With a name like Tracy, stick to a bar in Southy." He grinned and with a last wave, left.

John slumped forward a little, wincing and bringing his hand to his ribs. "Well, did you see the X-rays?"

She nodded. "Yes. You have a hairline fracture of your eighth rib. With your previous injuries, we need to keep a close watch for the next twenty-four hours to make sure you don't develop a pulmonary contusion. They're getting ready to admit you now."

John shook his head. "No. No way. I have no idea what you just said, but I'm not staying. I'm going home." He got to his feet, and stood for a moment as the room began to spin.

"Sure you are." Christa held his arm to steady him. "Did I mention the head injury? They want to run a CAT scan."

"I'm not staying." John said again.

"John, it's just overnight, for observation."

"No. I want to go home." John looked at her, pleading. "Christa, please I can't stay here."

Christa softened at the look in his blue eyes. "All right, let me see what I can do."

A half hour later, John was seated in the passenger seat of his Jeep as Christa deftly steered them through the busy streets. Neither spoke in the fifteen minutes it took to drive back to the brownstone. Christa pulled up in front. "Go. I'll park the car and be in shortly."

John nodded and carefully stepped back out into the rain and made his way inside. He shrugged off his ruined jacket, and glaring at the torn sleeve, hung it on the rack and sat down on the couch, his head in his hands. He heard the door open and Christa's footsteps echoing down the hall. He waited for her to explode at him, but surprisingly, none came. He glanced up. Christa had sat down on the armchair across from the couch, a grim look on her face. "Hi." He smiled. Her expression didn't change. John sighed. "You heard the cop, I didn't start it."

"But you didn't walk away either did you?" Christa got up and paced the room. "You walk out of here, not telling me where you're going and then I get a phone call from the ER saying you were unconscious! What was I supposed to think!"

"I needed some air. I'm not used to having someone hovering over me all the time." John retorted.

"You've got four brothers for God's sake and you tell me _I'm_ hovering!"

"That's not the same thing. You're my girlfriend, not my mother."

Christa shot him a look full of venom. "Well forgive me for caring." She said coldly and started from the room. The phone buzzed and she turned back. "By the way, your father's been calling all day. Guess you forgot about him too." She marched up the stairs.

John swore to himself and went into the office. "What?" He said into the video phone.

"_Well hello to you too. You said you'd call."_ Jeff told his son.

"I've been busy. Sorry." John said shortly. He sat down in the chair, belatedly remembering his ribs and winced.

Jeff took in his son's ragged appearance, the darkening bruise on one cheek, the bandage on his knuckles, and the torn and bloody shirt. _"John, what happened?"_ He asked concerned.

John shook his head. "It's nothing."

"_That doesn't look like nothing. What happened?"_

"I'm fine Dad OK. No worse than usual. Look, this is kind of a bad time. I have to go."

"_John wait! I—_ _"_

John cut the connection and went in search of Christa. He found her upstairs in his room, sitting on the window seat. "Christa?" He called out softly. She shifted, but didn't turn to look at him. He walked over to sit down next to her. "Hey…" He turned her head to look at him, and saw that she was crying. "Oh baby, don't do that." He pulled her into his arms, ignoring the pain that rippled through his chest.

He held her close as she sobbed, running his hands over her smooth cap of dark hair. "Christa, honey I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

She looked up at him, her face streaked with tears. "I was scared John, so scared. You were so sick last night, then when the ER called…" She choked back a sob and he pulled her to him again.

John rested his head on top of hers. "I was an idiot Christa. You were right, I didn't try to stop the fight. I went looking for one." He sighed.

Christa pulled back, wiping at the tears on her face. "Why won't you talk to me?"

He shook his head. "I can't!" He got up and paced the room. "My…work is top secret. I'm not supposed to tell anyone."

"Do you work for the government?"

John nodded, then shook his head. "Yes, no…sometimes."

Christa dropped her hands at her sides. "I can't help you if you won't let me John." She said helplessly.

He ran a trembling hand through his hair. "It wasn't exactly a plane crash." He said quietly a few minutes later.

She looked at him, puzzled. "What do you mean?"

He sighed wearily. "My injuries didn't come from a plane crash. A group of… terrorists attacked Thun…the facility that I worked in. I got caught in the explosion. I was alone, with no way to contact help. The parts I told you, about it taking two hours to get to me, and four to get me out. That was true." He trembled at the memory.

"Oh John…"

He went on, not seeming to hear her. "Then, just when I felt safe, he escaped and tried again." His voice was cold, expressionless. "He…they…kidnapped some members of our team. I went to try and find them."

"Alone?"

John shook his head. "No, I joined the World Police Forces."

Christa's eyes opened wide in shock. "They let you do that?"

He looked at her, his expression unreadable. "It's amazing what the Tracy fortune can buy into." He turned back to stare out at the rain.

"John? Then what happened?" She asked when the silence had gone on to long.

He jumped, having forgotten she was there. "We found them. They were waiting for us." He closed his eyes. "They're not called terrorists for nothing." He closed his eyes. "He…They get…inside your head. Fuck with your mind." His body started to tremble. "You have no idea what he's…what they're capable of."

Christa stood very, very still, somehow sensing there was much more to what happened than John was telling her.

He went on as if she wasn't in the room, reliving the whole horrific episode. "They sent a thug to stop us. He shot my partner, and beat me nearly senseless, but we managed to stop him. Then it all went to hell from there. The leader, he made our commander choose. Choose which operative he wanted to live. He was going to kill the other. Luckily, one of the other officers that had gone missing, returned and took the guy out. If he hadn't come when he did then I…he…" John choked back a sob, and his whole body shook with unsuppressed emotion.

Sudden comprehension dawned on Christa, and her eyes widened in horror. "No, she whispered. "Oh John no!" She walked over and touched his hand. He was cold as ice. "John, don't. Don't do this to yourself."

He went on, not seeming to hear her. "I dream about it. Every night. I hear his voice, see his eyes, even when I'm not sleeping. Sometimes I don't even know if what I'm hearing and thinking is real." He finally turned to her, and the anguish in his eyes nearly broke her heart. "I can't do this anymore Christa. I can't live like this, wondering who's lying in wait around every corner. It's easier to just go numb. Then I don't have to think or feel." He dropped to his knees, tears running down his face.

Christa sat down and took him in her arms, gently stroking his hair. "John, honey you're right, you can't live like that. Maybe you should talk to a professional. Someone who could help you work through this."

He shook his head. "You don't understand. I can't tell anyone. It's all classified. I never should have even told you."

"Your family then? I mean, they must know what happened?'

"No, they…they don't understand." His voice choked on a sob again. "I'm alone. All alone."

Christa clasped him tightly against her. "No you're not John! I'm here, I'll never leave you."

He looked up at her, hope filling his blue eyes. "Promise?"

"I promise."

* * *

Scott lay on his bed, idly massaging his sore shoulder. It should have felt better by now, but it still ached. He feared he had really screwed it up again and the thought of more surgery terrified him. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore and went to the bathroom, opening his painkillers. Only two pills fell into his palm. _I couldn't have used them all. I must have dropped them or something._ He shook his head in confusion and quickly filled a glass of water, noticing how much his hands were shaking. He wiped sweat off his forehead, and quickly swallowed the pills. _I hope I'm not coming down with something. That's all I need at this point._ He sighed and went in search of Virgil.

He found his brother in his studio, painting. He stood in the doorway for a few moments, watching his brother work. It never ceased to amaze Scott how Virgil could take what he saw and put it down on canvas. Scott couldn't even draw a passable stick person. He watched as Virgil stepped back and reached for something under a stack of rags.

"You shouldn't be smoking those things. Trying to kill yourself?"

Virgil whirled in surprised, dropping the pack of cigarettes. "Scott! You scared the crap out of me." He looked down and then back up at Scott. "You knew?"

"The doc at the hospital told me you had a decent buildup of nicotine in your lungs. How long you been at this?" Scott asked, walking into the room.

Virgil shrugged. "Since college. I usually only need one once in a while. The craving gets worse during times of stress."

Despite himself Scott had to grin. "So you must be up to a carton a day by now." Scott quipped. He stared at his brother. "When did you start wearing a hat?"

Virgil blushed. "I just felt like it." He brought his hand up self-consciously to the Kansas City Royals cap he had on his head.

Scott laughed. "It didn't come out?"

Virgil scowled. "No, it didn't." He pushed the cap down tighter on his head. "And when I get my hands on the little brat, I'm going to drown him, then figure out a good place to hide his body where it can't be found."

"Alan helped too."

"Alan's smaller, his body can be chopped up easier."

Scott burst out laughing, accidentally jarring his shoulder. He winced.

"Hey, you OK?" Virgil asked with concern.

Scott nodded. "Yeah, just sore. You got any more of those painkillers?"

"You're out of them already?" Virgil asked in surprise.

"No, I lost half of them. Went right down the drain when I tried to open it one handed the other day. Why on earth do we need child-proof caps on them anyway? Half the time I need Alan to open the bottle for me!"

Virgil laughed. "I never thought of that. Habit I guess." He rummaged in his pocket a minute, then handed Scott a set of keys. "Here's the key to the med locker. Just take a few and give me the keys back when you're done."

"Thanks Virg." Scott waved and he made his way down to the infirmary. He unlocked the med locker and gazed inside at the bottles.

"Looking for something Scott?"

Scott turned. "Hey Steve. Virgil gave me the key. I need more of those painkillers."

Steve frowned. "You should have had plenty."

"I know. But I'd like to see you try and open a childproof cap one handed and keep them from spilling down the drain."

Steve laughed. "Never thought of that. Here, let me get those for you." He reached around Scott and took out a large bottle. He poured the pills onto a tray and counted them out, then placed them in another bottle. "Here you go. Pop off cap, should be a bit easier." He handed Scott two of the pills, and the bottle.

With an inward sigh of relief, Scott grinned. "Thanks Steve, see you around." He put the pills in his pants pocket, and glancing at his watch, noticed it was nearly dinner time. He made his way down to the kitchen. "Hey Onaha, need any help?"

The Malaysian woman smiled. "No thank-you, and you should be resting that arm. Kyrano told me it was still bothering you."

"Some." He sat down at the table. Alan, Fermat and Tin-Tin arrived shortly, and Alan made sure to sit on the opposite side of Scott. Scott glared. "Don't think that's going to save you Sprout."

Alan grinned. "No idea what you're talking about bro."

Scott scowled. "Just don't let Virgil get a hold of you. He mentioned something about you being small enough for him to chop into little pieces."

Alan swallowed audibly, and his friends laughed. Jeff and Brains walked in, followed quickly by Gordon. Gordon took one look at Scott, grinned and sat down next to Fermat. Virgil was next, still wearing his Royals cap.

Jeff frowned at him. "Virgil, hats off at the table."

Virgil shook his head. "I'd rather not Dad."

"Virgil. Hat off, now." Virgil scowled and with a glare at his younger brothers, took the cap off. Jeff nodded. "Much better. Now Brains, about—" He stopped and stared up at his middle child. "Virgil?"

"Ask them." He snarled, pointing to Alan and Gordon.

Jeff arched an eyebrow at his two youngest sons. They stared back, both with innocent expressions on their faces. Jeff shook his head. "I don't think I want to know."

Onaha and Kyrano appeared at that moment, and served dinner. Soon, everyone was eating and talking. During a lull in the conversation, Jeff looked over at Tin-Tin. "Tin-Tin, everything all right?"

The girl looked puzzled. "Fine, Mr. Tracy, why?"

"I heard your scream this morning and—" He was cut off as Gordon choked and started coughing, sending milk snorting out his nose. Alan pounded on his back, trying to help. "Gordon!" Jeff called out alarmed.

"Let him choke." Scott said bitterly.

Jeff looked from Scott and Virgil's angry glares to Alan and Gordon's self satisfied expressions. He tried unsuccessfully to hide a smile. "I see."

"V-V-Virgil? I hate to mention this, but I analyzed the sh-sh-shampoo you gave me. I'm sorry, there's n-n-nothing you can do. I'm afraid it's p-p-permanent." Brains told him.

"You could cut it." Gordon said innocently.

"You little…" Virgil shot up out of his chair as both Gordon and Alan bolted from theirs. "I'll kill you both!" He rushed after them, Scott following, only a little more slowly.

"We'd better go help Alan." Tin-Tin and Fermat quickly ran after the brothers.

Jeff smiled at Brains, Onaha, and Kyrano. "Looks like things are getting back to normal." They all laughed as they heard a roar and a loud splash from outside. Jeff picked up his glass and saluted his friends. "It's about time."


	13. Chapter 13

Thanks to everyone who's reading and reviewing! Or, just reading and enjoying. Again, I don't own the Thunderbirds, wish I did...

* * *

John stood in the shower let the hot water wash over him. He leaned with one hand against the wall, and the other wrapped around his chest. He ached all over, body and soul. Finally, when his skin rivaled that of a boiled lobster, he stepped out and wrapped a towel around his waist. He paused and scowled at his reflection in the mirror. His chest was a myriad of shades of black and blue, the slice on his left arm nearly matched the scar on his right, and his right cheek had the beginnings of a lovely shiner. He went into the bedroom and was pulling on his pants when Christa called out to him.

"John? How are—"

"Jesus Christa! Stop doing that!" He burst into a coughing fit and sat down on the bed, his legs shaking. "I thought you had gone to work?"

She smiled and shook her head. "I took a few days off."

John sighed. "Christa, you don't—" He held up a hand to stem her protest. "Let me finish. You don't have to do that for me, but I'm glad you did. I'm glad you're here." His blue eyes bored into hers.

She walked over to stand next to him, and lightly ran her fingers through his damp hair. "I'm glad too. Lie back."

John grinned. "Really?" He shifted backwards and lay on his back on the bed.

"Don't get your hopes up champ." Christa pulled her stethoscope out of her bag and listened closely to John's chest. "Breathe…In…Out…In…Out…Good." She pulled it out of her ears and ran her fingers along his chest.

"Hey that tickles…Ouch! Dammit Chris!" John flinched as she hit his sore ribs.

She glared at him. "First off, don't _ever_ call me that again. The name is **Christa**. Second, you seem fine, no complications which is a relief all things considered. Third—"

John grinned. "There's a third?"

She ignored him. "Third, you're not going anywhere or doing anything today. I want you resting, understand me?" Her tone booked no argument.

John snapped off a salute. "Ma'am, yes ma'am."

She swatted him lightly. "Brat." She sat down next to him on the edge of the bed. "How are you feeling this morning?"

John's shoulders slumped. "You want the truth? Terrible. Everything hurts and I've got at headache and the chills." He replied wearily.

Christa frowned and touched her hand to his forehead. "You've still got a fever. Didn't they give you any antibiotics at the ER?"

"They gave me something. I guess I forgot about it with…everything. The bottle is downstairs in my coat pocket." He started to sit up and coughed again. "Dammit!" He rasped, gasping for breath.

"Easy John." Christa helped him to a sitting position and his breathing eased. "You're not doing anything today. In fact, I don't want you leaving this bed."

John twinkled his eyes at her. "Really? I think maybe you should join me, just to make sure I stay put."

She smiled back. "Yeah, you think so?"

"Sure do."

She leaned forward and kissed him deeply. "I love you. I'm going to hop in the shower. Don't go too far." With another kiss, she left the room.

John watched her go, and when he heard the water start, he went downstairs into the kitchen. He quickly made himself a mug of cocoa, and wandered into the office. He sat down in front of the desk, and glanced up at the clock. Doing some quick mental juggling, he figured it was just after dawn. He knew his father would be up and taking a deep breath, dialed the island.

"_Hello?"_

"Hey Dad."

Jeff's eyes lit up in surprise. _"John? Son, it's good to hear from you. Is…is everything alright?"_ He asked hesitantly.

John smiled tiredly. "I'm fine Dad. Sorry about yesterday, I was kind of in the middle of something."

"_That something wouldn't be how you got that black eye now is it?"_

"Can't fool the old man."

"_That's right, and don't you forget it."_

"I…I guess I owe you an explanation." John fidgeted nervously in his chair.

"_Yes, I'd say that you did."_ Jeff's tone was carefully neutral, but John could sense the anger underneath. _"So John, are you going to tell me what happened?"_

John shrugged. "Nothing much. I just wanted to check in. Let you know that whatever you might have heard, I'm fine."

Jeff raised his eyebrows. _"And what am I going to hear?"_

"I got into a bit of a…predicament yesterday." John answered cagily.

"_Do I want to know what kind of predicament?"_ Jeff asked warily.

John shrugged again. "It was sort of a bar fight."

Jeff nodded thoughtfully. _"I assume you didn't start it."_

John shook his head. "No sir. But I did finish it."

Jeff took in the bruise on his son's cheek. _"How does the other guy look?"_

"Which one?" John grinned, then started coughing again. When the fit stopped he let out a low groan and rubbed his temples with his hands. "It's just a cold Dad." He said in answer to his father's unasked question. "But one of the bastards hit me hard enough to crack a rib. Don't fret, I went to the ER and had it looked at. They also gave me antibiotics for the cold."

Jeff sighed. _"Do you want me…do you want me to send one of your brothers out there for a few days?"_

John smiled. "No thanks Dad. Christa's going to take some time off from work and stay with me."

"_Christa…She the one I spoke to the other night?"_ John nodded. _"She seemed like a nice girl."_

"She is." John looked down for a minute. "She's kind of been staying with me for the past few weeks." He said quietly, his face pink and avoiding his father's eyes.

Jeff smiled at his son's discomfiture. _"John, you're a grown man. You don't have to justify your actions to me. Well, not much anyway."_

John laughed. "Thanks Dad." He sighed. "I saw part of the rescue on TV. Are you…Is everyone alright?" He asked hesitantly, not meeting his father's eyes.

Jeff nodded. _"Virgil and I got caught when the roof came down. We both got a few burns and swallowed a little too much smoke. Spent a few days in the hospital, just to make sure."_

"And your back?"

Jeff frowned. _"Who told you about my back?"_

"A little bird named Scott. Plus, I can see you're in pain." John finally looked up.

"_I'm fine John."_ Jeff smiled.

John smiled back. "So, what else is new?"

"_Well, to start with, Gordon and Alan have made up."_

"Uh-oh. Scott or Virgil?"

"_Both actually. They put fake mice in Scott's shower."_ Jeff grinned. _"And they put dye in Virgil's hair gel. Permanent dye."_

John grimaced. "What color?"

"_Let's just say your brother now matches his Thunderbird."_

John groaned. "You're kidding."

"_Wish I was."_

"Bet that didn't go over too well." John said, knowing his middle brother's fetish with his hair.

"_You'd be right."_

Then John chuckled softly. "Mice huh?"

Jeff nodded. _"I could hear the scream from halfway across the island."_ They both laughed. _"They've been hiding out for almost a day now. Virgil did catch up with Alan and tried to toss him into the pool, but Gordon intervened and Virgil went in instead."_

"I hope you got pictures."

"_Oh don't worry, I'll email them to you."_ Jeff promised.

John was quiet a few moments. "How…How are things with Thunderbird 5?"

"_Not good. We've finished all the structural repairs but can't seem to stabilize the power. Every transponder we install blows in two minutes. Brains is starting to freak out."_ Jeff answered.

"Brains, freak out? It must be serious." John frowned in thought, then shook his head. "Dad, can I ask you something?"

"_Anything John."_

John took a shuddering breath. "How did you know Mom was the one?"

Jeff grew quiet, and his eyes grew thoughtful. _"I guess I just knew. From the moment I met her, somehow I knew she and I were meant to be together. I know it sounds crazy, but that's what happened."_

John nodded. "It makes perfect sense." He said quietly.

"_Does she make you happy John?"_

John looked up, startled at the question. "Yes, she does. Happier than I ever thought I could be. She makes me forget…things." He answered quietly, his eyes taking on a faraway look.

Jeff smiled. _"Then hold on to her."_

John shook off his ghosts and smiled back. "I plan on it."

Jeff grew thoughtful for a moment. _"What else is going on son?"_

"I don't know what you mean Dad."

"_John."_

John shook his head. "I'm not sure." He said quietly. "I've been having…nightmares, that's all."

"_That was no nightmare."_

John gulped. "Yes it was."

Jeff shook his head. _"John, I can't help you if you won't let me."_

"You sound like Christa." John sighed. "Look Dad, it's OK. I was just going through a rough patch. You don't have to worry about me."

"_It's my job to worry about you."_ Jeff shook his head. _"John, I've tried to be patient, let you have your space, but frankly after this bar incident, I'm concerned. There's someone I think you should talk to. He'll be discreet, he's one of my agents."_

John shook his head and held up his hand. "No Dad, no shrinks. I'll be fine."

"_Getting drunk and starting a bar fight isn't fine John."_

"I told you I didn't start it. Look, I don't want to fight about this OK? I told you I'd call and let you know what was going on and I did. I had the bar owner send the damage bill to Tracy Enterprises. Take the money out of my private account."

Jeff sighed in defeat, dropping the subject. _"Very well. John, please…I do care about you. Don't ever doubt that."_

"I know." He glanced up as he heard the water turn off upstairs. "I have to go Dad. I just wanted to say hi."

"_Take it easy son. Call if you need anything."_

"I will. Hey Dad?" John looked up at Jeff. "Have Brains send me his specs on TB 5. I'll take a look. Maybe I can figure it out."

Jeff tried to keep the surprise out of his voice. _"FAB John. Talk to you soon."_

"Bye Dad." The screen went dark. John leaned back in his chair, his forehead furrowed in thought. _Transponders keep blowing…that's what happened to me too. I wonder if the main power grid is compromised. It would make sense. Especially if…_

"John?"

"I'm in here babe." John looked up as Christa walked in. She wore nothing but one of his button up shirts, and he felt his throat go dry. "Christa…" He said huskily.

She smiled seductively. "See something you like."

He got up and walked over to her, running his hands over her face, down her arms, along her back. "I love you." He whispered as he crushed her to him.

She was breathless when he released her. "I thought I told you to stay in bed."

"Then you'd better get me back there." He bent his lips to hers again, this time easing her head back, deepening the kiss.

She pulled back, her indigo eyes dark. "What are we waiting for?" She asked huskily as she took his hand and led him up the stairs.

* * *

"Yee-hah!" Gordon hit the water with a tremendous splash, thoroughly soaking Scott, who was lounging nearby in the sun.

"Dammit Gordon!" Scott leapt to his feet, wincing at the pain in his shoulder.

Gordon surfaced and shook the water out of his eyes. "Sorry Scott. I was aiming for Alan here." He grinned at his younger brother.

"Hey!" Alan retorted indignantly. He immediately lunged at Gordon, and soon the two were each trying to drown the other, causing water to fly everywhere.

Scott scowled and shaking the water off himself, marched into the house. He bumped into Virgil on the way and swore under his breath as his bad shoulder was knocked about. "Can't anyone watch where they're going in this house!" He stormed off down the hallway.

Virgil watched, mystified at his eldest brother's behavior. He shook his head and went outside to the edge of the pool. "Hey! Now what'd you two do to Scott?" He called out.

Gordon surfaced and swam to the edge of the pool. Virgil warily took a few steps back, out of reach. "Scared Kermit?" Gordon grinned.

Virgil glared. "Watch it fish-boy. What'd you do to Scott?" He asked again.

Gordon shrugged. "Nothing. He may have gotten a little wet when I jumped in…"

Alan had joined them at the pool's edge. "He just stormed off inside. Seemed kinda grumpy to me."

"He's always grumpy lately." Gordon muttered.

"Can you blame him?" Virgil said accusingly.

The younger boys shrugged. "It was just a joke." Alan said.

"We were just trying to lighten things up around here." Gordon added. "It's not like somebody died or anything."

Virgil sighed. "I know. He's just taking John's leaving really hard." He said quietly.

Gordon scowled and ducked under the water, surfacing halfway across the pool. He began doing laps, seemingly ignoring his brothers. Alan watched for a moment. "Hey Virgil?"

"Yeah Sprout."

Alan sighed. "Do you think…I mean…" He sighed. "Do you think John still cares about us?" He asked, his blue eyes filled with some emotion Virgil couldn't read.

Virgil sat down and lowered his feet into the water. He was quiet a few moments. "Yes Alan, John still cares about us. I think part of the problem is that he cares too much."

"How can you care about some one too much?"

Virgil sighed. "We tend to…forget about John sometimes." He held up his hand to keep Alan quiet. "It's true and you know it. He's so far away, and even when he comes down, he's so quiet and keeps mostly to himself. Well, since all this started, we've been almost smothering him. He's not used to this much attention, and frankly, he hates it."

Alan nodded thoughtfully. "John doesn't let people get close to him, does he? I mean, I know he loves me, and he always makes time for me when I talk to him, but he seems kinda standoffish sometimes, know what I mean?"

Virgil nodded. "Yeah he does. I think Scott's the only one whoever got through John's shell and even that is only rarely. Something happened when they were up there on Thunderbird 5. And then again down in the mine with Dad and the Hood. Scott won't talk about it, and with John gone…" Virgil shrugged. "To tell you the truth Sprout, I'm at a loss at what to do."

Alan sighed. "Did Dad really tell John he was incompetent?"

"Alan, you have to understand, there were alot of emotions flying around." Virgil's eyes looked off into the distance, remembering. "Dad was so freaked out about you, Fermat and Penny missing. Then finding out it was the Hood and thinking John and Scott were dead…" Virgil shook his head and shuddered.

"Did John really freeze up there?" Alan nodded skyward.

"Yes. I'm not sure of all the details, again, Scott's not telling, but yes, he froze. And Hood hit them. We picked up the debris trail and couldn't raise them. The computers all read negative on the life signs." His hands clenched into fists and his voice turned cold. "We should have gone up there. But a rescue came in and we decided to go take care of business before checking on our own."

Alan looked stunned. "You…you left them up there?"

Virgil nodded. "Yes, and we can't even blame Dad for this one. Gordon and I pushed him to go. We just wanted things to seem normal. That maybe when we got back everything would be OK."

"It was though. I mean, Tin-Tin told me how they picked up John and Scott and how they escaped in the pod. So, why did Dad go all ballistic on him?"

"Again, there was alot happening Sprout. Dad needed someone to lash out at. I mean, we all have each other to lean on. Who does Dad have?"

Alan was thoughtful. "I guess you're right. But he still shouldn't have said that."

"I agree. This goes alot deeper than this one incident. You heard John before he left. There's alot of resentment there that I think has been building up a long time. What happened with the Hood was just a catalyst. John _had_ to leave, I can see that now. I'm not happy about it, and I think if he had stayed, we could have helped him work through whatever's bothering him. But, that's not John's style. He's by himself so much that he tends to forget about us too."

Alan nodded. "It just seems so weird, not having him to talk to. We talk alot, like when I'm at Wharton. Sometimes he calls just to say hi."

Virgil looked surprised. "Really? Huh, didn't know that." He grew thoughtful. "I think he sees alot of himself in you. There's no doubt that you two look like Mom, and you both have similar interests. Not to mention the bond of being the two brothers who get sent away all the time."

"I wish Dad would let me stay here and be home schooled like Gordon."

"After this last mess, I'd be more surprised if he didn't."

They both grew quiet for a few minutes, the only sounds being Gordon still doing his laps. "Virgil, I'm sorry about your hair. We really didn't know it was permanent." Alan said softly.

Virgil had to laugh at Alan's remorseful expression. "Sure you didn't. Don't sweat it just yet Sprout. We'll get you back when you least expect it."

Alan laughed. "In your dreams Picasso." Then he sobered again. "Thanks for talking to me like this Virg."

Virgil smiled affectionately at his youngest brother. "You handled yourself great out there Alan. We tend to forget you're growing up. We want you to stay ten forever."

"Terrific."

Virgil pushed his head under. "Brat."

Alan surfaced spluttering and laughing at the same time. "I dare you to come in here and try that again!"

"Do I really look that stupid? Don't answer that." Virgil got to his feet. "I'm going to go find Scotty and see what his problem is." He started into the house.

"I think his shoulder's really bothering him. He pops those pills of his all the time." Alan called out, swimming back towards the center of the pool.

Virgil froze and turned back. "What did you say?"

"Huh?"

"Get back here!" Virgil waited until Alan swam back to the edge. Gordon saw them and came over.

"What's going on?" Gordon asked.

Virgil ignored the question. "Alan, what do you mean he keeps popping pills?"

Alan shrugged. "It's no big deal. I saw the bottle. It's just the pain stuff you and Steve gave him."

Virgil swore under his breath and without another word to his brothers, turned and hurried into the house.

"What was that all about?" Gordon asked.

"Beats me." Alan answered.

Gordon lay back in the water. "This whole family's gone nuts as far as I'm concerned. It's pretty scary when I'm thinking you and Fermat are the normal ones around here."

Alan responded by pouncing on his brother, catching him off guard and dunking him. Gordon came up spluttering, his brown eyes full of mischief. "This means war."

Alan grinned ferally. "Bring it on."

* * *

Scott leaned, one handed on the sink in his bathroom. Though his arm was no longer immobilized with the sling, it still pained him. He pulled his painkillers out of his pocket and poured them into his hand. Silently counting them, he frowned. _How can I be almost out of them already? I know I haven't taken that many…have I?_ He shook his head and looked in the mirror. He was pale, with dark circles under his eyes. He brought his hand up to brush the hair off his forehead, and was surprised to see how badly it was shaking.

_What is wrong with me?_ Scott took a shuddering breath and looked down at the pills in his hand. _So I take a few painkillers, it's not like it's an illegal drug or anything. And at t least I'm not wallowing at the bottom of a whiskey bottle like John._ The thought of his brother made him scowl, and he quickly swallowed two of his pills. He put the bottle back in his pocket, and went to lie down on his bed.

"Scott?" There was a muffled knock from Virgil outside his door.

Scott ignored it and closed his eyes, pretending to be asleep.

"Scott? You in there?" Virgil called again.

Scott still didn't answer, and after a few moments, Virgil gave up and walked away. Scott sighed and closing his eyes, this time falling into a real sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

As I've said before, I don't own 'em, just the ones I made up! Enjoy!

* * *

"I just don't get it! There's got to be a logical reason for the transponders shorting out, I just don't see it!" John frowned as he peered down at the computer screen. He punched in a series of codes, then sat back and watched as the computer ran through his data.

"**Processing information."**

"Yeah, no kidding." John muttered. "Just get on with it."

"**Fatal error detected. Shutting down Thunderbird Five."**

"Dammit!" John pounded the desk in frustration. He got to his feet and paced the length of the office, muttering to himself. "The transponders aren't holding. They're being overcharged somehow, causing them to blow. I ran the check on the internal power system and it all came back clear. So what is causing the overload?" John sat down at the desk again and glared at the screen. "Why won't you work!"

He sighed and spent a few minutes typing in a new series of commands. "Try this you worthless hunk of junk." He pounded in the last key. "Ha!"

"**Processing information."**

John merely stared at the screen.

"**Transponders holding."**

John sat up, his gaze fixed firmly on the screen in front of him. "Come on…"

"**Power to Thunderbird Five has been re-set. You are now online."**

"Yes!" John shouted. He put in a call to the island. "Brains, you getting this?"

"_J-John! You managed to restore the p-p-power to TB 5?"_

"Looks like it Brains. Turns out that the—"

"**Fatal error detected. Shutting down Thunderbird Five."**

John whirled back to his computer. "God-dammit!"

Brains sighed. _"So much for t-t-that."_

"I don't get it Brains. Something is overloading the whole system." John was baffled. Thunderbird 5 was his baby, he'd practically designed the whole computer mainframe by himself. "There's no logical reason why this keeps happening!"

"_I'm just as con-con-con-perplexed as you are John."_ Brains shook his head and peered at his own computer.

"Did you run a diagnostics on the entire system? Sub-categories too?" John asked.

Brains nodded. _"F-First thing I tried."_

"Damn." John started thoughtfully at the screen.

"_It's almost like s-s- some kind of…outside interference…"_ Brains mused.

John's head snapped up. "Are the perimeter cameras still working?"

"_Y-Yes, why?"_

John didn't answer, but hastily pulled up another screen. "Panning left….up a little….There! Brains, can you see this?"

"_What is that?"_

John peered at the tiny blinking box attached to the power cables on the outside of Thunderbird 5. "If I was to guess, I'd say it's a power modulator of some kind. Probably the reason we keep blowing the system."

Brains nodded. _"Hood must have a-a-attached it to the missile."_ He bent over his own computer. _"I've never s-s-seen anything like it. It could be some k-k-kind of homing device."_

"Or he just didn't want us back up and operational." John mused.

"_P-P-Probably both. How do w-w-we get rid of it?"_

"Some one's going to have to go and pry it off." John shook his head. "Damn."

"_Do you w-w-want me to talk to J-J-J-your father?"_

John nodded. "Sure. I mean, you've got all the data there. Have him call me if he has any questions."

"_FAB John. T-Talk to you s-s-soon."_ Brains's face disappeared from the screen.

John stared at the blank screen, his thoughts in turmoil. _I should be up there helping. It's **my** 'bird. Or it was anyway._ He sighed. _I'm interested in what that thing turns out to be. And if it was actually the Hood who put it there. And if it was him, does that mean he wasn't trying to kill us in the first place? _He got up and paced the office again, his left hand idly rubbing his left side. _He's toying with us…with me. Like a cat with a mouse. Well, this is one mouse who's got teeth._

He was still working a few hours later when Christa walked in. "Hi there."

John looked up in surprise. "What time is it?"

"A little after seven."

John shook his head. "Huh, I guess I lost track of time."

She walked over to the desk. "Have you been working all day? I thought I told you to take it easy." Her eyes scanned his paperwork. "What are you working on?"

John hastily shut down the computer and shoved his notes into a desk drawer. "It's nothing. Just some stuff for my Dad. I've been here at the desk most of the day." He wrapped his arms around her waist as she sat on the desk. "How was your day?"

"Not bad. Only three traumas. A fairly quiet day in the inner city." She replied, bending over to kiss him.

"Hmmmm….." He held her close. "Love ya."

She smiled and ran her fingers through his platinum hair. "You've got more color today. Feeling better?"

"Yep." He leaded back in the chair. "Better enough that I'm sick of staying in the house. It's stopped raining, want to go out for dinner?"

"Sure! Just let me change."

A short time later, they were walking through the Common. "What are you in the mood for?" Christa asked.

"How about Italian? I know this great little dive bar in the North End." John grinned.

She swatted him lightly. "Brat. There's a nice little Malaysian place over in Chinatown. Want to go?"

"Sure. The people who work for us, the Belagant's, come from Malaysia. I kinda miss Onaha's cooking."

Christa laughed. "You need to put a few pounds on you. You're too thin!" She teased.

John grumbled under his breath but took her hand as they strolled into Chinatown. The rain had stopped and people were taking advantage of it, as the sidewalks were crowded. Soon they reached the restaurant and were able to get a small booth in the back.

John glanced at the menu. "Let me order."

Christa shrugged and shut hers. "OK, but nothing too spicy."

John just grinned and turned to the waitress, firing off an order in rapid Malay. The girl looked and him in surprise, then smiled and answered back. She then turned and hurried off to the kitchen, returning a moment later with a plate of long crispy looking sticks. Smiling again at John, she went back to the kitchen.

Christa arched her eyebrow up at John. "You speak Malaysian?"

He shrugged. "A little."

"That was more than a little." She watched as a blush crept along his face. "Why are you blushing?"

He shrugged again. "I…like languages. I speak a few of them."

"Like what?"

"Just…a few."

"John, how many?"

He looked up at her. "Eight, counting English."

Christa's indigo eyes opened wide. "You speak _eight_ languages? What are they?"

"French, German, Russian, Spanish, Malay, Mandarin Chinese, and Japanese." He said quietly. "And a little Greek, but not enough to be considered fluent."

Christa leaned back in her chair. "Wow." He looked up sharply at her. "No, I'm serious. That's pretty incredible. Considering I can barely speak English."

"I noticed when you 'pahked' my 'cah' the other day." John grinned at her.

"Brat." She timidly poked at the dish in front of her. "What is this exactly?"

John picked up one of the sticks and dunked it in the sauce. "_Keropok Lekor_. Try it, it's good."

She cautiously took one. "What is it made of?"

John shook his head. "If I tell you, you won't eat it." His eyes twinkled. "Unless you're chicken."

She frowned at him and bravely bit into her appetizer. "Well?" John asked.

"Not bad." She took another bite. "Quite good actually."

"Told you." He grabbed another one. "Its fish, ground into a paste, then mixed with spices."

Her hand froze, halfway to her mouth. "Fish paste?"

"Yep."

She shuddered and put it back on the plate. "I think I've had enough."

"Wimp."

"That's right." She stared at him a minute and grinned.

"What?" He asked.

"Eight languages huh? Brainy and hot. I am one lucky gal." Christa smiled seductively at him, the burst out laughing as he blushed again. "I love you." She told him as she leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips.

John rolled his eyes, but grinned back. "Love you too."

They sat back and leisurely enjoyed their dinner, talking quietly and just taking pleasure in being together. When they had finished, both decided it was too early to head home, and hand in hand, they walked down the street. It was a warm night, in the mid-seventies. They made their way down to Faneuil Hall, all lit up for the tourists, and John paused at the flower shop and bought a pink rose. He handed it to Christa, making her indigo eyes twinkle.

"You're a hopeless romantic John Tracy." Christa said as she kissed him on the lips.

"One of my many virtues." John said, gazing down at her. Suddenly, he stiffened up, his eyes turning cold and wary.

"What is it?" Asked Christa, following his gaze.

John glanced around. "Let's go home." He took her hand firmly in his and started off, walking so fast he was nearly dragging Christa as she struggled to keep up.

"John wait!" She pulled her hand out of his grasp and stopped. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just want to go home." John's eyes darted to and fro.

Christa planted her hands on her hips. "What is it John? What are you so afraid of?"

"I'm not afraid." John snapped, walking forward again.

_Liar…_Christa sighed and hurried after him. They walked along in silence, John looking behind him every once in a while. "John, there's no one there." Christa said quietly as they entered the gates to Boston Common.

"There was." John replied curtly.

Christa reached forward and placed her hand on his arm. "John, stop." He paused. "Talk to me."

John shook his head. "It's nothing."

"You don't have a panic attack like this over nothing." Christa met his gaze fearlessly. "Now talk to me."

"Not here…" He glanced around, his blue eyes wide with fear. "He'll find us."

"Who'll find us John?"

John shook his head again and looked away. "I can't…Christa I just want to go home."

The simple pleading of his request nearly broke her heart. "All right." She took his hand and they started off again. They had almost reached the far gate leading to the brownstone when a figure stepped out from the bushes. John started and instinctively pushed Christa behind him. The man stepped into view and John breathed an inward sigh of relief.

"What do you want?" John demanded.

"Just hand over your wallet and you'll be fine." The man growled.

"I don't think so." John's tone was icy.

"John just give it to him." Christa whispered behind him.

"Listen to her pal and no one gets hurt." The man reached under his jacket and pulled out a lethal looking knife. Christa gasped and pressed closer to John. "Now, hand over your wallet."

"Whatever you say." John started to reach into his jacket. The thug moved closer and John struck.

John's fist connected solidly with the man's face, staggering him backwards. Before the would-be robber could react, John followed up with a kick, knocking the knife to the ground. The man darted forward fists flying wildly. John pushed Christa away and met the man with fists of his own. They fought for a few minutes, then John scored a lucky punch and the man sprawled to the ground.

John grabbed him by the collar and hauled him to his feet, slamming him up against a tree. "Still want my wallet?" John growled. He slammed the man against the tree again. The man yelped in pain. "Think its _fun_ to prey on people?"

"John stop!" Christa pleaded.

This time John's fist connected with the man's midsection and he doubled over in pain. "This is easier than actually working for a living?"

"John don't! You'll kill him!" Christa tried to grab John's arm but he shook her off.

"This scum doesn't deserve any mercy." His voice and eyes were cold and utterly emotionless. John hit the man again, this time in the face. The man moaned and blood dripped down from his nose and lips.

"John stop this! You'll kill him!" Christa said again as pushed herself in between them. "Please John, stop!"

John let go of the man, and he sagged to his knees. John glanced around and spying the knife on the ground, grabbed it and hauled the thug to his feet again. He waved the knife under the man's nose and his eyes widened in fear. "Don't…don't kill me…Please!"

"I'm not like you. Now get out of here, and remember this next time you try and rob someone." John gave the man a shove and he fell. The man stumbled to his feet and without a backward glance, fled across the park.

John watched him go, breathing heavily, his eyes not quite sane. "J-John?" Christa called hesitantly.

The sound of her voice quivering snapped John back to reality. He turned and took her in his arms. "Are you alright?"

She nodded, clinging tightly to him. "Let's just go home."

They started forward, John keeping one arm wrapped around her, the other hand holding the knife he had taken from their attacker.

"What are you going to do with that?" Christa asked.

John paused and looked around. Then he smiled and marched towards the curb. He held the knife over the sewer grate and let go. It fell, landing with a splash. "That takes care of that." He turned back to Christa. Her face was pale and her eyes darted around in fear. "C'mon honey." He led her down the sidewalk and up the stairs into the house.

Once inside, John steered her to the couch. "Sit for a minute." He walked over to the liquor cabinet and poured two drinks. Walking back, he sat down next to her and handed her a glass. "Here, drink this."

Christa eyed the glass and shook her head. "No." She got to her feet and wrapping her arms around herself, paced the living room.

John downed his whiskey in one swallow. "Honey, you need to relax. Sit down."

She whirled on him. "Relax? You want me to relax? We could have been killed!"

"It wasn't that bad Christa."

"Wasn't that bad! He had a knife John!"

"Operative word here is 'had.'"

"It's not funny John! You should have just given him what he wanted! But no, you had to be the big hero!" Tears ran down Christa's cheeks.

John got up and poured himself another drink. "So, letting him get away to do this to others was the right thing to do?" John's tone was eerily calm.

"That's not what I meant." Christa told him.

He turned and met her gaze. "Then what did you mean?" He asked, downing his drink again.

She turned and hugged herself again. "I don't know…It all happened so fast." She sighed then turned back to him. "Who were you running from? Before this happened?"

He avoided her eyes. "No one."

"Don't lie to me John."

"Drop it Christa. It's nothing."

"That wasn't nothing. You had a full blown panic attack. And by hiding at the bottom of your glass, you're avoiding dealing with it." She said to him.

"Back off. You have no idea what I'm going through." John shot back.

"I would if you'd just talk to me!" She cried. "But no, you withdraw back into yourself." She watched as he poured himself another shot of whiskey and she scowled at him. "That's your answer to everything isn't it? Just have another drink and it will all go away!"

John cursed and threw the glass across the room, where it hit the wall and shattered. "I don't want to talk about it." He growled, his eyes glittering dangerously.

"That's pretty obvious." Christa refused to back down.

John turned away from her, his body shaking. "Just leave me alone."

"No."

He whirled around. "Don't you get it! I want you to leave! Just go!"

Christa shook her head and folded her arms across her chest. "No. Not until we finish this."

"It is finished." He sat down on the couch with his head in his hands.

"I don't think so." Her tone softened. "John, I love you, but I can't help you unless you let me in."

John didn't look up but shook his head. "I can't! He knows I'm here."

"Who knows?"

His body trembled and his breath was ragged. "He's here." He said again, this time looking up.

The anguish in his blue eyes nearly broke Christa's heart. "Oh John…" She knelt down in front of him and drew him close, holding him tightly against her chest and ran her fingers through his hair.

John leaned against her, clenching his eyes shut. He wrapped his arm around her, nearly crushing her. "I can't take this anymore Christa…I can't!"

"Who did you see John?" She asked him, more gently this time.

He pulled back and shook his head. "Him. The guy who did this to me."

Christa's eyes opened wide with shock. "He wasn't caught? He got away?"

John sighed and put his head in his hands again. "No, he's in jail, but…He can still hurt me. Hurt you."

Christa shivered. "We need to call the police. The FBI, someone!"

"NO!" John took a shuddering breath. "No. They wouldn't believe me."

"Your family then?" She started towards the phone, but John grabbed her arm.

"No, I can't tell them."

She frowned. "John, if you're in some sort of trouble, wouldn't you think they'd like to know?"

He smiled, a sad, thin, little smile. "No, they wouldn't." He sighed. "My family and I aren't exactly on the best of terms at the moment."

"Your father seemed fine when…that time…"

John shook his head. "That was an extenuating circumstance." He sighed again. "They…It wouldn't matter to them. Trust me." His voice was thick with emotion. Christa's eyes filled with tears as she drew him close once again. He rested his head on her shoulder. "I'm sorry Christa, I'm so sorry. Please don't leave. Don't leave me alone." He said brokenly.

"Never John. Never."


	15. Chapter 15

I'll say it again...Don't own 'em! Just the ones I made up! Enjoy!

* * *

Virgil scowled as he counted the pills left in the med-locker. Then counted them again. His scowl deepened as he compared his count to the inventory log. He punched a button on the speaker phone at the desk. "Steve? Have you given out any of the Vicodin lately?" He tried to keep his voice casual.

"_Not since I saw Scott a few days ago, why?"_ Steve asked.

Virgil closed his eyes. "No reason, I'm just doing inventory and making up a grocery list. Thanks."

"_No prob."_

Virgil sighed as he hung up. _Now Scotty, time to find out what's going on._ Virgil made his way back to the pool terrace and glanced around. Gordon was back to doing laps and the younger kids had left. Scott was nowhere to be seen. Virgil took a deep breath and pressed a button on his communicator. "Hey Scotty, where are you?" He tried to keep his voice casual.

"_In the kitchen. Onaha made cookies."_

"Chocolate chip?"

"_Oh yeah."_

"I'll be right there."

"_Actually, I'm headed down to the gym."_ There was a strange edge to Scott's voice.

"Hmm…Good idea, I should go workout before I eat the cookies. Makes room for more. Meet you there." Virgil cut off Scott's protest and hurried to the gym. He went inside and saw Scott swallowing something and then swiftly shutting his locker door.

"Hey Virg. What's up?" Scott asked quickly. A little too quickly.

Virgil eyed his eldest brother critically. Scott was pale, with a faint sheen of sweat across his forehead. He held his injured arm tight against his chest. Virgil frowned. "You OK?"

Scott nodded and avoided his brother's eyes. "I'm fine." He said shortly. "I...

ah…I guess I don't feel like working out after all."

"Scott, I think Steve should take a look at that shoulder." Virgil said evenly.

"It's fine." Scott snapped.

"Then why are you still taking pain meds?" Virgil asked quietly.

Scott's head snapped up. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I was just up in the infirmary taking inventory. Seems like we've gone through quite a lot of Vicodin in the past few weeks." His hazel eyes bored into his brother's grey ones. "I want the med-locker key back Scott."

"I—I don't have it." Scott hedged.

"Yes you do."

"Are you saying I took the meds?" Scott demanded.

"I didn't say that."

"You sure as hell implied it." Scott started to push by his brother.

"Give me the key Scott, or I go to Dad." Virgil's tone was like steel.

"Fuck you Virgil!" Scott shoved his brother with his good arm.

Virgil easily deflected the move. "Knock it off Scott. I'm just trying to help you."

"Leave me alone!"

Virgil stepped in front of Scott, blocking the door. "I've already lost one brother to an addiction. I'm not going to sit idly by and lose another one."

"You're a fine one to talk. How many cigarettes have _you_ had today Virgil?" Scott shot back.

Virgil shook his head. "There's a big difference between a few cigarettes and overdosing on pain meds."

"I'm not overdosing on anything! They're prescription drugs. You can't get screwed up on prescription drugs!" Scott yelled.

"That's crap and you know it!" Virgil shouted back.

"I don't have to stay here and listen to this." Scott started to push by Virgil again, but his younger brother stood firm. Scott snarled and threw a punch with his good hand.

Luckily for Virgil, Scott wasn't a southpaw and the punch merely grazed his cheek. Virgil brought his own fists up and knocked Scott backwards. "Don't Scott. I don't want to hurt you."

Scott merely snarled again and threw himself at his brother. Virgil again deflected Scott's blows. "Scott knock it off! I don't want to hurt you!"

"It's not me you should be worried about!" Scott retorted. His fist connected solidly with Virgil's face and Virgil staggered backwards into the lockers.

"**What is going on in here!"**

Both turned as Jeff walked into the room. "Either of you want to go first?" He asked, glaring at both his sons.

"It's nothing Dad." Virgil muttered, rubbing his jaw.

Jeff merely folded his arms across his chest and stared at them both. "Scott?"

"Just a difference of opinion." Scott answered, not meeting his father's eyes.

"Oh really." Jeff stated.

"Look Dad, it was nothing." Virgil told him.

"Didn't look like that to me." Jeff frowned at them both. "Don't you think we have enough problems without the two of you going at each other's throats?"

Both boys looked down at their feet. "Sorry Dad." Virgil said.

"Sorry." Scott muttered.

Jeff stared at them both. "Now, want to tell me what this 'difference of opinion' was?"

Before either could answer, the alarm sounded. Scott bolted from the room, with his father and brother at his heels. Before they entered the Command-Control center, Virgil pulled his father to a stop.

"You can't let Scott go on this rescue."

Jeff frowned. "Why not? Is his shoulder still bothering him?"

Virgil shook his head. "Some, but that's not why." He sighed. "Look Dad, I don't have time to get into this right now. Just don't let Scott go."

Jeff shook his head. "Virgil…"

"I'll talk to you later." Virgil opened the door and stepped inside. A few moments later, they were joined by Gordon, Alan, Tin-Tin and Fermat.

"What is it Brains?" Jeff asked.

"E-E-Earthquake in Turkey. The locals have re-re-re-asked us to respond and help." Brains replied.

Jeff gazed thoughtfully down at the screen. He looked up to find Virgil's hazel eyes locked firmly on him. "All right…Fermat, you stay here and man Base. Virgil, you, Gordon and Tin-Tin get to Thunderbird 2, I'll have Steve meet you there. Scott, you take Thunderbird 1…" Out of Scott's line of vision, Virgil shook his head at his father. Jeff took a deep breath. "Scott, you'll be acting as co-pilot. Alan will fly and you'll man Mobile Control."

"What!" Scott exploded. "Thunderbird 1 is mine! **I'm** her pilot!"

Jeff shook his head. "Not this time. And if you want to split hairs, Thunderbird 1 belongs to me. Unless you have a few million stashed away somewhere that you'd like to give me."

Gordon choked on a laugh and his eldest brother glared. Scott turned back to his father. "I'm fully capable of flying her father. I don't need a babysitter."

"Hey! I'm not a babysitter." Alan yelped.

Jeff held up a hand. "Enough." The room quieted. "All right Scott. You tell me you can fly, prove it. Raise your right arm."

The order took Scott by surprise. "What?"

"You heard me. Raise your right arm. High, above your head." Jeff met his son's gaze unflinchingly.

Scott merely scowled and turned on his heel, marching over to his alcove. A few seconds later the door closed and he was gone. Gordon shot Alan a cocky grin. "Good luck Sprout." He winked then he too disappeared into his alcove. Alan followed a heartbeat later, Tin-Tin right behind him.

Virgil started towards his, only to be stopped by his father. "Virgil. Keep an eye on things out there."

"I will." Virgil nodded.

"And be prepared to explain all this when you get back." Jeff said sternly.

"Yes sir." Virgil also vanished behind his portrait.

Jeff sighed and looked over at Brains and smiled thinly as the house shook from the roar of the departing rockets. "Thunderbirds are go."

* * *

"_Choose Jeff. Which son do you want to live?" The Hood asked malevolently._

_Jeff shook his head. "I won't."_

"_Then I kill them both."_

_A searing pain tore through John's head. Beside him, Scott slumped to the ground with a moan._

"_Stop! Leave them alone!" Jeff yelled._

_Hood smiled evilly. "Then choose."_

_Jeff bowed his head. "Scott. I want Scott." _

"_Very well."_

"_Dad no!" John screamed as his head exploded in pain. He looked up at his father. "Dad…why?"_

_Jeff merely shrugged. "I'm sorry John. Good-bye."_

_Darkness…_

_John looked around. He was surrounded by a grey mist. "Hello?" He took a few steps forward. "Dad? Scott? Hello?" He called out again._

"_You are quite alone John."_

_John whirled. "Where are you?"_

"_But you're used to that aren't you, spending all that time up on Thunderbird 5."_

"_Show yourself!" John peered through the mists._

"_Who are you talking to John?"_

"_Dammit Hood! I know you're here!" _

"_But where is here John?" The mist swirled in front of him. Then it solidified and the Hood stepped forward._

_John backed up in fear. "Leave me…" His voice trailed off._

"_Alone?" Hood laughed, an evil sound that grated on John's nerves. "John, you have no idea how amusing you are." _

"_What do you want with me?" John demanded, swallowing his fear._

"_What makes you think I want anything to do with **you**?"_

_John frowned. This was not the answer he was expecting. "They why? Why me?"_

_Hood smiled charmingly. "Why John, I thought you'd enjoy having a friend."_

"_I have enough friends."_

_Hood laughed again. "Really now, then where are they?" He turned in a circle, gesturing with his hands. "I don't see anyone."_

_John turned. "Just go away." _

"_Like your family did?" Hood placed a hand on John's shoulder and turned the young man until John faced him. Hood's voice grew soft and compassionate. "They don't care about you John, not really." _

"_Yes they do." John tried to put some force behind his words._

"_Then why did they let you go without a fight?" Hood watched the confusion appear in John's ice-blue eyes. "Did they try and stop you from leaving?"_

"_Yes. Dad…my father wanted me to stay." John pulled himself out of Hood's grasp._

_Hood let him go. "Did he really? Or was he just saying that? Trying to do what a good father was supposed to do."_

_John turned. "What…what do you mean?"_

_Hood shook his head. "You tell me John. How hard did your father try to persuade you to stay? And how often has he called to see how you were doing?" Hood watched the emotions flash across John's face. Confusion, betrayal, realization… "I am correct am I not?"_

_John turned away again, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. "So what if you are. I can take care of myself." His voice wasn't quite steady._

"_Of course you can." Hood walked around him. "And you have your new friend, what is her name again? Ah yes, Christa."_

_John's head snapped up and his blue eyes flashed dangerously. "Leave her out of this." He snarled._

_Hood held up his hands. "Out of what John?"_

"_Out of whatever little game you're playing."_

"_Game? What game?" He faced John once again. "Come, come John. I'm not the one playing games. You are." Hood's red eyes glittered. "You're deceiving yourself, thinking they care. Even Christa. Did she thank you for saving her life tonight? No, she criticized you for the event in the first place. Is that how someone who cares behaves?" Hood went on without waiting for John to reply. "And your family, how many times have they tried to get in touch with you, just to say hello? They didn't even bother to call when your precious father was injured in a rescue. Your brother, Gordon was it? I believe he even hung up on you when you tried to call yourself. Is that the actions of a family who cares John?"_

_John's shoulders slumped. "No." He whispered._

"_Then why do you persist in thinking that they are concerned about you?"_

_John merely shook his head. "I…I…"_

"_Yes John, only you." Hood's image began to fade into the mist._

"_Only you…alone…"_

* * *

John bolted awake, his chest heaving. He winced and idly rubbed his left side. Christa stirred next to him.

"John?" She called out sleepily. "Is everything alright?"

John took a shuddering breath and laid back down, taking her in his arms. "Fine, everything's fine." She mumbled something incoherent and fell back to sleep.

John laid there, his thoughts in turmoil, staring up at the ceiling until dawn.


	16. Chapter 16

This one is for all of you who complained about my lack of cliffhangers. Enjoy!

* * *

Virgil arced Thunderbird 2 around and set the giant ship down a short distance away from Thunderbird 1. Almost before the ship had come to a stop, Gordon was unbuckling from his seat and heading out to the cargo bay. Virgil waved at Alan through the cock-pit windows and then headed outside.

The small village must have been beautiful once. Now it was a mass of broken buildings and debris from the effects of the earthquake. People wandered around, some aimlessly, seeming to be in shock, others trying to get some sort of recovery effort started.

Spying the others over near Thunderbird 1, Virgil hurried over. "Here's what's going on." Scott spread a large map on the table. "The quake caused major damage. Its epicenter is believed to be in this general area. Brains is still running scans to pinpoint the exact location." He pointed to a section on the map. "The main road in is totally destroyed. Rescue crews have to go the long way, it's nearly two hours out of the way."

"So we're it?" Alan asked.

Scott nodded. "We're it. Gordon, take the Thunderizer. Start moving some of this debris so we can get to the survivors."

Gordon nodded. "FAB."

"Virgil, get to the Firefly, see if we can shift some of this rubble. From what I gather, this was a school."

Virgil's eyes grew wide with concern. "Crap." He muttered, looking out over the area.

"Alan, you and Tin-Tin take the Mole and start digging out underneath these main buildings." Scott pointed to the map. "Steve, I think you should get a temporary field hospital started. I think we're the only ones here at the moment with any kind of emergency experience." Steve nodded in reply. Scott then gazed at the map again before looking up at them all. "Without Thunderbird 5, we need to really keep on our toes. Brains and Fermat will be monitoring from Base, but there is a significant time lag in information. Keep your communicators on at all times, is that understood?" Scott's voice matched the steely glare in his eyes. They all nodded. "Then move out."

They scattered, each to their respective assignments. Inside TB 2's cargo bay, Virgil paused and looked back out at his oldest brother. Scott showed no signs of the emotional rollercoaster he had been on before they left. While that could be because of the responsibility of the rescue, Virgil felt otherwise. He ducked into sick-bay for a moment, then hurried back to unload the Firefly.

Gordon meanwhile, had moved the Thunderizer out and headed towards the worst of the debris. The locals seemed to sense he was there to help, and cheered.

Alan and Tin-Tin climbed into the Mole and started up. "Tin-Tin, check with Scott. Tell him we're going in and have him clear the area." She didn't reply. "Tin-Tin?" Alan turned to look at her. They young woman sat very still, staring vacantly out the window at nothing. Alan shook her lightly. "Tin-Tin!"

She blinked and turned to him, her coffee eyes wide. "Alan…"

"What is it?" He asked, gripping her hand tightly.

"John…He…Something's happened."

Alan's blue eyes widened in fear. "Is he alright?"

"I don't know." She shook her head. "He's not hurt, I know that much."

Alan frowned. "But you don't know what's going on?"

She shook her head. "No. And we…we can't worry about John right now." She looked up at him, her eyes full of compassion. "We have a job to do."

"You're right." Alan sighed. "He called once, if he's in that much trouble, he'll do it again."

She smiled and leaning over, kissed him softly. "Yes, he will."

Alan smiled back. "Let's go."

* * *

Scott was wrong with his estimate. It took the local authorities nearly five hours to reach them. By that time, most of the casualties had been assessed and were being treated in the makeshift hospital tent Steve had set up near the town's center.

A native, covered in dust and blood chattered incoherently at Scott. Scott smiled and pointed in the direction of the hospital tent. The man bowed and limped off. He sighed. "Brains, any luck on the translators yet?"

"_N-N-No Scott. I'm sorry. The main s-system is still frozen up on T-Thunderbird 5. I'm working on a new sys-sys-program, but it's going to take some time."_

Scott swore under his breath and for the hundredth time, mentally cursed John. _We wouldn't be having half these problems if we could just talk to some of them._ "Thanks anyway Brains."

"_What's the current situation Scott?"_ Jeff asked.

"We think we've managed to find all of the survivors. Steve and Virgil have been taking care of the injuries. Gordon, Alan and Tin-Tin are assisting with the search and rescue." _And I'm standing here doing nothing._

"_Good. The local emergency services should be there within the hour."_ Jeff told him.

"FAB Dad. Op 1 out." Scott wiped a shaking hand across his forehead. He had a headache, and could feel the throbbing of his shoulder in time with his pulse. Taking a deep breath, he looked around.

This area of the countryside seemed to have been hit hardest. Most if not all of the buildings had been destroyed. Scott took a shuddering breath and winced at the sharp pain in his shoulder. He glanced over to the hospital tent and spying his brother's green uniform, scowled._ If he thinks I'm asking** him** for any help, he's got another thing coming._ Glancing down at his equipment, he tried to concentrate on the task at hand.

"Scott?"

Scott jumped. "Gordon, what's up?"

Gordon frowned at his eldest brother. Scott was pale, and a faint sheen of sweat covered his forehead. His hands shook at the computer. "You OK?"

Scott nodded. "Just anxious to get this done so we can get home and in the pool."

Gordon grinned. "Can't blame you there Scotty. Where do you want me? I've finished excavating the far end of town. All the survivors are over with Steve and Virgil. And the dead…" He shuddered. "I sent Alan and Tin-Tin to secure the Thunderizer while I took care of them."

Scott's grey eyes filled with compassion. That was one part of the job they all hated. No matter how much they tried, they just couldn't save everyone. Scott sighed. "I know Gordon." Scott placed his good hand on Gordon's arm and smiled thinly. "Look, go make one last sweep of the school. Make sure we've got everyone out."

"FAB Scott." Gordon jogged off towards the building.

Scott stared down at the computer screen for a few minutes. Suddenly his stomach cramped painfully and he looked over at Triage again. _The hell with this._ Putting the computer on stand-by, he hurried over to Thunderbird 2. He quickly made his way to the med-locker. Finding it locked, he opened the cupboard where they kept the key. It wasn't there. Scott stood staring at the empty hook, then frantically tore through the cupboard looking for it. Not finding it, he moved onto the next, then the next until he had thoroughly searched them all. Breathing heavily, he stared once again at the locker, then scowling, exited the giant green ship and headed to Thunderbird 1.

Alan intercepted him half-way across the field. "Hey Scott! Scott wait!"

"What Alan?" Scott demanded shortly.

Alan took a step back at his brother's tone. "You alright?"

Scott nodded. "What do you want Sprout?" He asked, trying to keep his temper in check.

"Tin-Tin and I secured the Thunderizer and the Mole. What next?"

Scott too a shuddering breath. "Take the Firefly and go demolish that building before the aftershocks bring it down on someone."

Alan's eyes lit up. "Really? FAB Scott!" They young man raced off to the large bulldozer shaped vehicle. Within moments, he had it moving off to where Scott had indicated.

Scott didn't stick around to watch Alan leave, but instead hurried into his 'bird. He hurried to where the med-kit was kept. It was gone, leaving nothing but the empty brackets where it was supposed to be housed. Swearing loudly, he grabbed the nearest object, which happened to be a portable medical scanner. It shattered with a resounding crash as it hit the wall.

He stood there for a few minutes, his body quivering. He ran a hand through his sweat soaked hair, and sat down on the edge of the cot. He was feeling very nauseous at this point and his head was hurting enough to be sending flashes of light behind his eyes. He groaned and put his head in his hands.

"_What the hell was that?"_

Scott's head snapped up and he stared down at his communicator. "Gordon?"

"_Scott! I think we're being hit with an aftershock. The whole place is shaking."_

Scott quickly rushed out the door and headed towards Mobile Control. "Gords, I'm not registering anything."

"_Dammit Scott! The whole place feels like it's about to fall on me!"_

Scott frowned down at the screens in front of him. "Gordon, I don't know what's going on, but the screens are clear on my end."

"_I don't give a fuck what the screens say! This whole place is quaking like a virgin on her wedding night!"_ Gordon's voice held an edge of panic to it.

"Hang on Gords…" Scott looked up as Tin-Tin came running over.

"Scott, what's happening?" She asked, her coffee eyes wide.

Scott shook his head. "I'm not sure. Gordon is reporting an aftershock, but nothing is reading on the scanners…Oh God!" The blood drained from his face. "Alan stop! Gordon's in there! Alan can you hear me!"

"_Scott? What is it?" _Alan sounded confused.

"Gordon's in there somewhere! Stop the demolition!" Scott shouted into the microphone.

"_Gordon? What's he doing in—" _Alan's voice was cut off by a scream from Gordon.

Scott and Tin-Tin watched in horror as the building containing Alan and Gordon collapsed with a thunderous roar.

* * *

John sighed in contentment as he lay face down on the blanket and closed his eyes. It was a beautiful summer day at the beach, and the sound of the waves was lulling John to relax totally for the first time in ages.

"Don't go to sleep." Christa warned.

"Why not?" John mumbled back.

"You'll fry in this sun. At least put some sun block on." John merely grunted in reply. "I mean it John, you'll get a heck of a sunburn on a day like this."

John cracked one eye open and smiled devilishly. "Then you better put some on me."

Christa laughed and dug the bottle of lotion out of her bag. She smiled to herself and poured the liquid onto John's back. He yelped in surprise as the cold lotion hit his hot skin. Christa merely laughed again and began rubbing the lotion into his back. She straddled him in order to reach his shoulders and leaned in close and whispered into his ear. "You know, it's a good thing this is a public beach or I'd do more than rub sun block on you."

John blushed red. "Christa…What am I going to do with you?"

"I thought I just told you we couldn't do that here." She laughed. "Now, roll over so I can get your other side."

John's blush grew deeper. "I don't think that's a good idea right now."

Christa looked puzzled for a moment, then started to giggle. The giggle turned into a chuckle and soon both of them were laughing as tears ran down their faces. "I love you." She said as she kissed him lightly on the lips.

John merely smiled and lay back, once again closing his eyes. "Love you too." He said softly.

They were quiet for a few minutes. "Do you want to go swimming?" Christa asked him finally.

"Nope."

"Why not? It's beautiful out. I'll bet the water is nice."

John glared up at her. "Nice? _Nice!_ Are you kidding me? That ocean is probably no warmer than 60 degrees! Where I come from that isn't considered 'nice', it's considered insane."

"Wimp." Christa grinned.

John closed his eyes and refused to take the bait. "Yup."

"So you're telling me you're going to just lie here all day?"

"Yup."

She sighed. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine."

"No chest pain?"

"Nope."

"Headache?"

"Nope."

"John…"

John looked up at her. "Look Christa, I just want to lie here and do nothing. Just bask in the sun for a while and relax. Not think about anyone or anything for a change OK?" His voice came out harsher than he intended and he sighed. "It's been three months today since my lab was attacked. I just want to be here with you and not think about any of it." He said quietly.

Christa smiled. "OK then. Sorry I pushed."

John closed his eyes. "Just don't let it happen again." He teased.

Christa rolled her eyes and pulled a paperback out of her bag. She settled down next to John and began to read. John tucked one hand in hers and dozed off.

"Help! Someone please help me!"

Both John and Christa's heads snapped up. "What was that?" John asked, his eyes scanning the beach. Before she could reply, the shout came again.

"My son! Help!"

A short distance down the beach, a woman was pointing out to sea. Far out in the water, John and Christa could see a group of people foundering in the water. A man started past John, and he grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Wait." John commanded.

The man paused. "There's kids out there! What are we waiting for?" He tried to pull free.

John's ice blue eyes scanned the water. "See that wave action? That's a rip-tide. It'll pull anyone who goes in it out in a heart beat."

By now a group had gathered around John. Christa had gone to comfort the woman, but looked over in John's direction. His mind whirled. "OK, anyone got a cell phone?" One woman nodded. "Call the Coast Guard and explain the situation. Some one get the rest of those people out of the water." Two young men ran towards the water, shouting and beckoning. Immediately the water started to empty.

John looked at the group around him. "Anyone here got experience in water rescues?"

Two people nodded. "I'm life-guard certified." One young woman answered.

"Former Navy SEAL." Another older man replied.

John nodded. "Good. We'll handle the rescue. The rest of you stay put. Rip-tides are only dangerous if you don't know what you're doing." They nodded. "Find some floats, boogie boards, anything like that." People scattered.

Christa hurried over. "You're not thinking of going out there?"

"No, I'm not thinking about it. I'm going."

"John you can't! Just because you grew up on an island doesn't qualify you to dive headlong into a rip current!"

John pulled his arm out of her grasp, his eyes still on the kids out at sea. "Yes I can. It's what I've been trained to do."

"What? Trained? John, what are you talking about?" Christa frowned in puzzlement.

_Shit, shit, SHIT!_ "Look, can we discuss this later?" John rushed forward into the water. When he was knee deep, he turned to the two people next to him. The young woman handed him a Styrofoam boogie board. "Thanks. I'm John."

"Lisa." She replied.

"Walter." The Navy man told them.

"Nice to meet you. OK, rip-currents run horizontal to shore. They're usually pretty narrow, so when you get to the kids, swim parallel to the beach. With any luck, we'll swim out of it." John told them.

They nodded and the three of them dove into the waves. The icy water stung like needles into his skin. Almost instantly, John felt the current tugging at him. "Don't fight it!" John yelled. "Let it carry you out!" A few minutes later, John found himself far from the beach. Spying the kids, he quickly swam over to them. "Hey there! Everyone alright?" John asked, shoving his board into the arms of the nearest boy.

"Th-Th-Thanks!" The boy's lips were blue with cold.

Lisa had a child in her arms, and had given another her board. Walter had two boys, one under each arm. "Is this everyone?" Lisa asked.

The boy next to John nodded. "Y-Y-Yes."

"Then how about we head in?" Walter turned on his back, and swam north, away from the beach. Lisa followed close behind him, pushing the other boy on the boogie board.

"All set?" John asked. The boy nodded, and John quickly pulled him close, wrapping one arm around the child's chest. Together they made there way through the water. Soon, the boy's weight and the cold water began to take its toll on John and he started to tire. He tried to look forward, but Lisa and Walter had far outdistanced him. "Al…almost there…" He panted.

Soon, he felt the current ease off and he headed into shore. By the time he hit the breaker line, his arms and legs felt like lead, and his lungs felt as if they were on fire. _You're sadly out of shape Johnny-boy…_ He felt someone pulling the boy from his grip, and two strong arms grabbed him about the shoulders and half dragged, half carried him to the beach.

John collapsed on the sand, his breath coming in ragged gasps. Christa pushed her way through the crowd and dropped to his side. "John!"

"Hey…babe…." John panted.

"Don't you babe me." She snapped, taking his wrist in her hands. Paramedics appeared behind her. "Pulse is steady but racing, reps ragged and uneven. He's got a cracked rib which may be part of the breathing problem."

John glared up at her. "You don't have…to talk about me…like I'm not here."

The paramedic laughed and took over from Christa. He pressed a stethoscope to John's chest and listened intently.

John pushed him away and sat up. "I'm fine. How are the kids?"

"A little cold, but they're all fine." The paramedic answered. He turned to Christa. "There doesn't seem to be anything wrong, but I'd like to take him in for a thorough once over."

John bolted to his feet. "No! No way. I'm fine." He took a deep breath and winced, bending over to rest his hands on his knees.

"Sure you are." Christa folded her arms across her chest and glared at him.

"Back off Christa." John growled, his eyes turning cold.

Christa refused to back down. "I want you to go get looked at."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes!"

"Go to hell Christa." John straightened up and marched off, leaving the others standing awkwardly staring after him.

Christa's indigo eyes flashed fire. She nodded her thanks to the paramedics and hurried after John.

John had stalked over to the blanket, and started throwing his things in his bag. People hovered around him yelling out questions but he ignored them. Christa once again pushed her way through the crowd. "That's it? You're leaving?"

John ignored her and finished packing up his things. "If you want a ride home, you'd better come now. Otherwise it's a long walk back to Boston." Without another word, John threw his bad over his shoulder and stormed off towards the parking lot.

Christa watched for a moment, then grabbing her bag and the blanket, ran after him. "John wait!" He didn't turn, but continued until he reached the Jeep. Christa marched up to him. "What the hell was that all about?" She demanded.

"I don't need any damned hospital." John snapped.

"Fine. But this goes deeper than that." Christa took a deep breath. "That was probably one of the dumbest things I've ever seen. Why did you go after those kids? The rescue personnel were on their way. You put yourself, those two people with you and the kids themselves in danger."

"I knew what I was doing." John growled as he unlocked the doors and threw his bag inside.

"Yes, it appears you did." She folded her arms across her chest. "Explain to me why an astrophysicist needs water rescue training."

John twitched. "That's none of your concern." He avoided her eyes.

Christa's eyebrows raised in astonishment. "None of my concern? Well excuse me for caring about you!"

"You're not my mother Christa, stop acting like it." John snapped angrily.

Christa took a few steps back at his tone. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I think I made myself perfectly clear."

"You arrogant son of a…" She marched over and stood toe to toe with him, her small frame barely reaching her shoulders. The fury in her voice made her seem larger however, as she poked John in the chest. "I know I am **not **your mother and I don't appreciate that remark. I am merely looking out for you, something that you're apparently not capable of doing."

"I can look after myself just fine thank you."

"Yeah, you've done a great job so far. Let's see, the plane crash, the World Police raid, jogging, a bar fight and a mugging. You're a pro John! Keep up the good work!"

John scowled and got into the Jeep. He waited a heartbeat then started the engine. Christa stood unmoving in front of it. "You getting in or not?" John asked.

She glared a moment longer, then climbed inside. Neither spoke as John threw the Jeep in gear and tore out of the parking lot.


	17. Chapter 17

Again, I don't own the Thunderbirds, just the characters I made up. Please do not use without my permission. Warning, there is some coarse language in this chapter. Younger readers please take notice.

Thanks to everyone who helped with all the medical details! You know who you are!

* * *

Virgil looked up as Tin-Tin rushed towards him. "Tin-Tin, what's wrong?"

"Virgil hurry! It's Alan and Gordon!" She barely got the words out of her mouth when Virgil was running towards Mobile Command.

"Scott! What's going on!" He demanded.

Scott turned, his face pale and his body shaking. "Virg…Alan and Gordon…They…They're…the school…."

Virgil gave Scott a good shake. "Snap out of it Scott! Where are they? What happened?"

Scott took a deep breath. "Alan went to demolish the school building with the Firefly. Gordon was in there. The whole place just came down on top of them."

Virgil stared at the fallen building. "Have you tried to raise them?"

"No…"

Virgil whirled on his brother. "Dammit Scott! What are you waiting for? You know the procedure!" Without another word, Virgil sprinted off towards the school. Tin-Tin followed close at his heels. "Alan, Gordon, can you hear me?" He said into his communicator.

"_V-Virgil?"_

"Alan! Are you alright?" Virgil asked, picking his way through the debris.

"_I…I think so…"_

"Hang on, we're almost there." Virgil paused and scanned the area. His eyes lit upon the familiar yellow of the Firefly. "Alan!" Scrambling over the debris, Virgil and Tin-Tin hurried to the giant machine.

"I see him!" Tin-Tin pointed, and together they shifted some of the rubble to find Alan, dust and dirt covered, but apparently unhurt. "Alan!" She threw her arms around him, holding him close.

Alan took a shuddering breath and clung to her tightly, burying his face in her dark hair.

Virgil chuckled to himself. "I take it you're OK then Sprout."

Alan looked up and nodded. Then the smile faded from his face. "Gordon, where's Gordon?"

Virgil placed a steadying hand on his youngest brother's shoulder. "Easy Alan, we'll find him. Scott, we've got Alan, anything on Gordon?"

"_Picking up a heat signature about fifteen yards from your present position."_

"FAB. Alan, you sure you're alright?" Alan nodded. "Then let's go find him." Together they made their way through the rubble. "Gordon? Gordon where are you?" Virgil called out.

They all froze as they heard a low moan. "Gordon!" Virgil hurried in the direction of the sound. He spied the tell-tale green and grey uniform half buried under a pile of wreckage. "Gordon?" Virgil peered down at his brother.

Gordon's face was tight with pain. "V-Virgil…"

"Easy bro, we'll get you out." Virgil carefully shifted some of the beams.

"Virgil…I…I can't feel my legs." Gordon's brown eyes were wide with fear.

Virgil paused and stared down at Gordon for a moment. "OK Gordon, don't panic." He tried to keep the dread out of his voice as he turned to his youngest brother. "Alan, I want you to go get Steve. Have him bring a back-board and the med-kit. He's got the kit on him. We're also going to need something to pry these beams off him." Alan merely stared uncomprehendingly at his brother. **"ALAN!"**

Alan jumped. "Back-board, med-kit, pry bar, got it. Hang on Gords, I'll be right back!" He turned and hurried as fast as he could through the demolished building.

"Tin-Tin, can you squeeze down to him?" Virgil asked.

The young Malaysian girl nodded and crept through the beams until she reached Gordon's side. She carefully felt around his head, and took his pulse. She glanced up at Virgil, her coffee eyes wide. "He doesn't seem to have a concussion, pulse is weak and thready."

Virgil nodded in acknowledgement as he began trying to move the beams off his brother. Gordon moaned again. "Easy Gords. We'll have you out in a minute."

A few moments later, Alan arrived with Steve in tow. They carried the back-board and Steve had the med-kit slung over his shoulder. "What happened?"

"Not sure yet. We'll worry about it when we get him out of here." Virgil started rummaging through the med-kit. Pulling out a bottle and syringe, he carefully made his way down to Gordon. "OK pal, just relax, this will take the edge off so we can move you." Gordon nodded slightly, his eyes and jaw clenched tight with pain. Virgil took a deep breath and pulling up the sleeve on his brother's uniform, swiftly plunged the needle into his arm.

Gordon winced, then moments later his body relaxed. "What did you give him?" Steve called out.

"A doctored up morphine-mix. It's standard procedure when his back goes out on him." Virgil answered. He watched his brother until Gordon nodded and his breathing steadied out. "OK, pass me the back-board." Alan and Steve lowered it down, and after bracing Gordon's neck in a c-collar, slowly eased the board underneath him. "Still with us Gordo?"

Gordon opened his eyes. "Still…here…"

"Don't move. We're going to get some of this stuff off of you, then get you home OK?" Virgil smiled encouragingly.

"FAB…Virg…"

Together, Alan, Virgil, and Steve moved most of the wreckage off Gordon. Tin-Tin stayed up by Gordon's head, talking quietly to him. Finally they had enough cleared away and were able to carry Gordon out of the building. As they set him down on the ground, Scott came rushing over.

"Gordon! What happened?"

Virgil glanced up quickly. "I was hoping you could tell me." He turned his attention back to Gordon. "How you doing Gords?"

Gordon tried to smile. "I'm OK Gus." He clenched his eyes shut and moaned.

"Sure you are…Steve, I'm going to need another few cc's of morphine." Virgil called out.

"Got it." Steve began rummaging around in his pack. "What's up with his back?"

"He was in a hydrofoil accident a few years ago. Broke his back. They said he'd never walk again." Virgil smiled down at Gordon. "But not only did he come back walking, he won swimming gold in the Olympics." Suddenly Gordon's eyes snapped open. "What is it?"

"Virgil! I can feel your hand on my leg! Oh God, I can feel my legs!" The words came out in a sob.

Virgil felt the tension leave his body. "That's great Gordon! Just relax, we'll have you home in a jiffy." He took the syringe from Steve and gently gave his brother another injection. Gordon relaxed further, and closed his eyes.

Alan knelt down at Gordon's side and took his hand. "I'm so sorry Gordon, I didn't know!"

Virgil looked up at him. "Didn't know what?"

"That he was in there. Scott told me to demolish the building." Alan voice was thick with emotion.

Virgil turned to Scott. "You sent Alan in there without checking Gordon's position?"

Gordon's eyes fluttered open in surprise. "Scott told me to go in and…make sure we had gotten everyone out…" His face was a mask of puzzlement.

Virgil took a deep breath. "Scott?"

Scott brought a shaking hand up to his head. "I don't…"

"Where were you Scott?" Virgil's voice was calm, but there was a touch of anger lurking underneath.

Scott narrowed his eyes at Virgil's tone. "I was here, doing my job."

"Alan, where was he when he told you to know down the building?" Virgil met his eldest brother's gaze unflinchingly.

Alan looked from one brother to the other. "He-He was coming out of Thunderbird 2 and heading over to One."

Virgil went red with anger. "Steve, get Gordon to Thunderbird 2. Keep him on the backboard. I'll be there shortly. Alan, you and Tin-Tin go help him." His voice was deadly calm. Alan nodded and together they moved Gordon off towards Thunderbird 2. As soon as they were out of earshot, Virgil whirled on Scott. "What were you doing coming out of TB 2? Looking for this?" He held up the key to the med locker.

Scott started, but before he could say anything, Virgil went on. "Then when you couldn't get your fix there you decided to head over to TB 1. How'd that work for you Scott?"

Scott's grey eyes turned cold. "You had no right to take that key, or the med-kit from One either."

"Oh really Scott? And why is that?" Virgil marched up to his eldest brother. "You might be able to hide it from the others, but not from me. You're a junkie Scott. And I'm not going to be the one who hooks you up."

Scott shoved Virgil away. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Like hell you don't! Gordon could have _died _Scott! And Alan right along with him! All because you needed a fix!"

"Fuck you Virgil!" Scott turned away, and started marching towards his rocket.

"Oh no you don't." Virgil grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. Scott yelped in pain. "So, your shoulder is still bothering you. I thought you had it checked. Looks like you're a liar as well as a junkie."

Scott reacted instantly and swung with his good arm. Unfortunately for Virgil, Scott's left was a good as his right, and his fist connected with Virgil's jaw, sending him sprawling to the ground. Virgil leapt to his feet and snarling, attacked with a punch of his own. Scott staggered backwards, blood flowing from his nose.

"You son of a bitch. I'll kill you!" Scott shouted.

"Yeah, then you'll never get your drugs! I changed the locks on the med locker at home too! Now what are you going to do junkie? Hard to score when you live on a desert island!" Virgil taunted.

Scott attacked again, only this time Virgil was ready and easily deflected his brother's fists. With a quick jab to Scott's gut, Virgil followed up to his jaw, sending his eldest brother to the ground. Virgil marched over and glared down at him. "I suggest you stay there for the time being Scott. I'll take you out if I have to."

Alan came rushing forward. "Virgil! Scott! What's going on?"

"None of your business Alan." Scott snapped.

Virgil's hazel eyes flashed fire. "Don't you _dare_ speak to him like that. In fact, don't you speak to him at all." Virgil glanced over at Alan. "**You** will be piloting Thunderbird 1 home. Take Tin-Tin as a co-pilot if you need one."

"I'm his damn co-pilot." Scott seethed.

Virgil turned back to Scott. "No, you're not. In fact, I'm relinquishing your command. Consider yourself relieved of duty."

Scott got to his feet, his face furious. "You can't do that."

Virgil snorted. "Oh yes I can. I'm the medical officer. Technically, **_I_** rank **_you_**."

"I don't have to stand here and listen to this bullshit."

"No you don't. But I'm telling you now." Virgil marched over and stood toe-to-toe with his older brother. "You say one word to Alan, one word at all, and you deal with me, got it?" Scott merely glared. "And when we get back, Dad hears about this, **all **of it." Virgil's voice was like steel.

Scott scowled in response and stormed off to Thunderbird 1.

"V-Virgil?" Alan stuttered.

Virgil took a deep breath and turned to his youngest brother. "What is it Alan?"

"It was my fault…With Gordon…If I had just—"

Virgil interrupted him. "Stop right there Alan. **None** of this was your fault, do you hear me?" Alan nodded hesitantly. "I mean it Alan. Scott is the one to blame. He is Mobile Control. It's **his** responsibility to keep track of his team, not yours. And I don't want you to listen to a word he says in there. Just ignore him." Virgil's tone softened. "Look Sprout, Scott isn't himself right now. Just concentrate on getting us home, I'll take care of things when we get there OK?"

Alan nodded. "But Virgil? I…I haven't landed TB 1 in her silo. Just in simulation."

Virgil smiled. "I've seen the sims. You'll do fine Sprout. Take Tin-Tin with you. And don't listen to Scott."

Alan nodded again. "Will you tell Gordon…"

Virgil placed his hands on Alan's shoulders. "There's nothing to tell him Alan. Now, get going. I'm going to pack up the rest of our stuff and then we'll take off." He pulled his brother into a quick hug. "It'll be OK Sprout."

Alan clung to him for a moment before pulling away. "I'll go get the Firefly loaded if you'll break down Mobile Control."

Virgil frowned. "You sure kiddo?"

Alan smiled. "I got her into that mess, I can get her out."

Despite himself, Virgil had to laugh. "Go for it Alan. Good luck!"

It took Alan a half-hour of maneuvering to free the Firefly from the wreckage. In the end, both Virgil and Tin-Tin had to manually move debris until the giant machine was able to get out on its own.

While Alan was securing it, Virgil sent a message back to Tracy Island, warning them about Gordon's condition. He avoided his father's questions as to Scott's whereabouts, telling Jeff only that they were all getting ready to take off.

Alan held Thunderbird 1 to an easy pace, waiting for Virgil to keep up. Virgil knew he was nervous about landing in the silo, and having Scott aboard and not in the greatest of moods, was not helping the situation. Virgil called repeatedly and Alan assured him that Scott hadn't said a word.

Finally the island was insight. Virgil watched as Alan positioned the giant rocked over the pool, and then circled around to land himself. He was just coming down the ramp when Scott hurried past. Virgil grabbed his brother's arm and held tight. "Oh no you don't. You're not going anywhere."

Scott struggled for a moment, then froze as Jeff marched in. "What's going on?" He demanded.

"Watch him. Don't let him leave." Virgil ordered, his tone unnaturally harsh. Without waiting for his father to answer, he hurried back up the ramp to help Steve push Gordon out in the stretcher.

By the time they got down from TB 2, Alan and Tin-Tin had joined them. Alan was pale, but seemed composed. Tin-Tin held one of his hands tightly in hers.

Jeff hurried over. "Gordon! What happened?"

"Ask him." Virgil hissed, nodding in Scott's direction.

Jeff turned a puzzled eye to Scott, who scowled in reply. "I think we need to debrief. My office, all of you."

Virgil shook his head. "I'll be there in a few. I want to get Gordon settled." Without a backwards glance, he and Steve hurried with Gordon to the infirmary. Brains was on hand to meet them. Together, they carefully moved Gordon off the back board and onto one of the diagnostic beds. They quickly scanned the young aquanaut and Virgil breathed a sigh of relief when the scans came back clean.

"Looks like some major bruising. No permanent damage." Steve told them both.

Virgil brushed his hand across his sleeping brother's forehead. "Thank-God." He whispered.

"I-I-I'll get his usual medicine ready for when he wa-wa-regains consciousness." Brains told them.

"Thanks Brains. Will you fill in Steve on Gords history? I need to get to the debriefing." Virgil started from the room, then turned. "And if Scott comes for painkillers, he gets nothing. Not even aspirin."

Steve nodded and turned back to Gordon. Virgil cast one last look at his brother then made his way upstairs. He paused outside the door to his father's office. He could hear Scott talking.

"…Virgil's just blowing this whole thing out of proportion." He heard Scott say.

Virgil took a deep breath and marched into the room. Jeff was seated behind his desk, Alan and Tin-Tin were on one couch and Scott was sprawled on the other. Virgil shot a withering glance at his eldest brother. "You seem calmer, got a hidden stash hidden between here and the silo?"

Scott's face turned red and in a heartbeat was on his feet, fists flying. One connected solidly with Virgil's face, sending him staggering backwards. Virgil recovered quickly, snarling, wiped the trickle of blood from his lip and advanced on Scott.

"**ENOUGH!**"

Both froze and looked over at their father. Jeff limped forward to stand between his two sons. "What is going on here?" Neither answered. "I asked you a question." Jeff turned to Virgil. "Virgil? Let's start with Gordon."

With one last look of loathing at his brother, Virgil turned to Jeff. "It's his back. We did some scans and they came back clean. Lots of bruising, some swelling, but no real damage. He should be up in a few hours. He'll be stiff for a while though."

"What about…" Alan gulped. "When he said he couldn't feel his legs." He asked quietly.

Jeff whirled. "What?"

Virgil paced the room. "It's nothing Dad. He was pinned under a couple of big beams and lost some feeling for a bit. He's fine now. We have him on morphine for the pain as usual."

Jeff shook his head in confusion. "Why didn't I hear about this at the accident scene?"

Scott sat back down and folded his arms across his chest. "Yes Virgil. You were in charge, why didn't you notify Base?"

"Virgil? You were in charge? Scott, what happened to you? You better not have tried anything with that shoulder." Jeff faced his sons, an angry glint in his brown eyes. "Someone better start explaining things, now."

"This is your show Virgil, go ahead." Scott said contemptuously.

Virgil shot his brother an angry glance. "Be glad to Scott." He turned to Jeff. "I took over command from Scott."

Jeff sat down stiffly. "I assume you had a good reason."

"He almost got Gordon and Alan killed."

Scott leapt to his feet again. "I did no such thing! If you hadn't butted your big nose in, I had everything under control!" Scott shouted.

"Really Scott? Was this before or after you went looking for your drugs?" Virgil shot back.

Scott swung at his brother again, only this time Virgil anticipated the attack and hit first. Scott yelped as Virgil's fist hit him squarely in the eye. Virgil then followed up with an uppercut to Scott's jaw, sending his brother sprawling to the floor. "Had enough junkie?" Virgil snapped.

"Virgil! Get away from your brother!" Jeff marched over to his middle son. "I want an explanation for this behavior. Now."

Virgil took a steadying breath and met his father's gaze unflinchingly. "We're missing meds. Vicodin to be exact. And the med-locker key. I had given it to Scott when he _claimed_ he had dropped his pills down the drain."

"What makes you think Scott didn't do just that?" Jeff asked.

"He hasn't returned the key. At the rescue, he sent Gordon in to clear a building while he went looking for a fix. I removed the med-kit from Thunderbird 1 and the key from Two. I had a feeling Scott was going to go look for them." Virgil replied.

"So what if I did! I had a headache! I had been standing at Mobile Control for over four hours! With the head-set on, trying to listen to Brains translate so we could talk to the natives! You try it and see what happens!" Scott shot back.

Jeff held his hand up. "Boys." They quieted down. "Then what happened?"

"While Gordon was still inside, Scott sent Alan in with the Firefly to demolish the building." Virgil answered.

Jeff turned to Alan. "Did Scott order you to do that?"

Alan nodded. "Yes sir."

"Did you check first, to make sure the area was clear?"

Alan turned red and looked down at his feet. "No sir…" He mumbled.

"No way!" Virgil marched over to stand at Alan's side. "There's no way I'm letting you pin this on him. Scott is the field commander, it's _his_ responsibility, not Alan's."

Jeff shook his head. "That's true. However, you know it's your job to confirm those orders."

Virgil merely glared. "Fine then. Don't believe me." He shook his head in disgust. "Take the word of our resident drug addict over me." Virgil started towards the door. "Alan, I'll be in my studio if you want to talk." At the door, Virgil paused again and looked back at his father. "No wonder John left." And he was gone.

Alan shifted uncomfortably. "Dad…"

Jeff smiled. "Relax son. You two go get cleaned up. We'll talk later." Alan and Tin-Tin left the room. Jeff then turned to Scott. "Was anything your brother said true Scott?"

Scott shook his head. "Dad I swear, I was just going for something for my head. I figured Gordon would be out by then. We had already found everyone, he was just doing a last check. I really thought Alan would have checked first."

"He's young Scott. Still not sure of everything." Jeff sighed. "How did everything else go?"

Scott quickly filled his father in on the rescue details. "Other than the aforementioned drama, it was pretty cut and dried." He yawned. "Look Dad, I'm beat and I've still got that headache. I'm going to grab a shower. Talk to you later." Scott got to his feet and with a wave, disappeared out the door.

Jeff sighed and rubbing his sore back, went to check on Gordon. He went down to the infirmary and paused at his son's bedside. Gordon was sleeping, and Jeff brushed a lock of hair from his forehead. Gordon's eyelids fluttered.

"Dad?"

Jeff smiled. "Hey Gordon. How're you feeling?"

Gordon shifted a little and winced. "Not too bad." He shifted again. "And not too good either."

Jeff grimaced in sympathy. "Get some rest son." Gordon nodded and closed his eyes. Jeff watched his son fall into a drug induced sleep. _I should call John. Let him know what's happened._ He did some quick mental figuring and noting the time difference, went back to his office to call his second son.


	18. Chapter 18

Sorry for the delay in posting! Now that it's the busy season at work, I don't have as much free time as I used to! Thanks to everyone who's reading! Enjoy. Have a great day.

* * *

John dropped Christa off at her apartment without either of them saying a word. He watched as she went inside, then he sped off with tires squealing. He got to the brownstone and headed for the shower. After toweling off, he went downstairs to the living room. He glanced at the answering machine and noticed there were over a dozen messages. Ignoring them, he went to the liquor cabinet and without bothering to get a glass, took a long pull straight from the bottle.

The phone rang and ignoring it, wandered into the kitchen, bottle in hand. Finding nothing of interest, he headed upstairs. Passing the office, he heard the phone ring again, the video phone this time. Scowling he decided to answer. "What?"

"_John?"_

John sat down behind the desk. "Who'd you think would answer?"

Jeff frowned. _"John…you're drunk."_

"Not yet, but I'm working on it." John took a long pull from his whiskey bottle. "Now, is there a specific reason you called, or just checking up on your prodigal son?"

"_Watch your tone with me John Glenn Tracy."_

John took another drink. "What ever you say _Father._" Jeff narrowed his eyes at his son's tone. John ignored the look. "So, what **did **you want?"

"_Your brother…Gordon got hurt during a rescue. It's his back."_ Jeff told him.

John shrugged. "And this concerns me how?"

"_I thought you would want to know."_

"You thought wrong." John set the now empty whiskey bottle on the desk. "Look Dad, was there something else? I've got things to do."

Jeff glared, his face turning red. _"I don't know what's bothering you John, but you will not speak to me like that."_

John snorted. "Oh please. Cut the caring father crap Dad. You've got four other sons you can take care of, you don't have to bother pretending with me."

"_I don't know what happened to put you in this mood, but you will NOT take it out on me."_ Jeff's tone held more than a touch of anger.

"Oh yeah Dad? What are you going to do? Ground me? Send me to my room?" John snorted. "Wait, I've got it. How about you let a madman kill me because you'd rather my older brother live instead!" John's voice had risen to a shout.

"_That's enough John."_

"Enough? I've barely gotten started." John peered into the screen. "You sent me away again Dad."

"_No **I** didn't. You chose to leave."_

"But you didn't try and stop me did you? Why Dad? What's wrong with me that you don't want me around?" John's voice cracked.

Jeff shook his head. _"John what have I ever done to make you believe that?"_

"You sent me to Thunderbird 5. Alone."

"_We've been through that John. You're an astronaut."_

"And who made me that way!" John got up and paced the room. "When did you ever ask me what **I** wanted to do with my life?"

"_You wanted to touch the stars since you were three years old. I never pushed any of you boys into anything. I helped you achieve your own hopes and dreams. Maybe if you got your head out of the bottle, you could see that for yourself."_ Jeff frowned. _"I'm hanging up before one of us says something we'll both regret. I'll let you know if there's any change with your brother."_ Jeff cut the connection.

John swore and threw the bottle across the room where it shattered with a resounding crash. He threw himself down on the chair and put his head in his hands.

* * *

Night had fallen as Jeff stared down at the paperwork in front of him. _At times like this, I wonder if it's worth all the headache._ He sighed and signed his name to another form. Finally, he sat back, idly rubbing the back of his neck. He yawned. _Think it's time to call it a night._ He got stiffly to his feet, wincing a bit at the twinge in his back. _Definitely time for bed._ He started toward the door then paused. _Better check the news, just in case._ He sat down on the couch and picking up the remote, turned on the TV.

After John left the island nearly two months ago, Jeff had made it a habit to watch the Boston news, just to keep a weather eye on things. A commercial was on at the moment, so Jeff picked up a report off the table and was skimming through it when the newscaster caught his ear.

"…_certain drowning from a riptide. Sources say three people went in after the boys and pulled them to safety. When questioned, witnesses say a man who only identified himself as John, no last name, organized the rescue. Authorities say the boys will recover with no ill effects as will their heroic rescuers. And John, if you're out there, thanks buddy. Now to Jerry with sports…"_

Jeff switched off the TV and stared at the blank screen. _Could that have been **my** John? Was that what put him in such a mood? But why? It's obvious the boys lived…why the bad temper?_ Jeff got once again to his feet and paced the room restlessly, all thoughts of sleep forgotten.

He made his way down to the infirmary to check on Gordon. His red-haired son was sleeping soundly, the pain lines on his face eased from the medication. He was still standing there a few minutes later when Steve walked into the room.

"Jeff! You startled me." Steve bent over Gordon and quickly took his pulse. Then he adjusted the blanket over Gordon's chest. Gordon let out a low moan, but didn't awaken.

"How is he?" Jeff asked quietly.

Steve motioned, and they moved across the room. "He's in good shape considering. I read his medical file. Incredible. He shouldn't even be alive, let alone walking and doing what he does."

Jeff glanced back at his son and smiled proudly. "He's got the heart of a lion, my Gordon."

"You can say that again. Anyway, I took another series of X-rays, just in case and everything looks fine. I'd say he'll be up and around in a few days. Back in the pool by the middle of next week."

"Probably sooner knowing Gordon." Jeff sat down stiffly in a chair.

Steve frowned. "Back still bothering you?"

"A little. It's been a stressful day." Jeff answered.

"Want something for the pain?"

"No thanks." Jeff was quiet a moment. "Steve, can I ask you a question?"

"Shoot."

"I'm assuming you heard what happened between Virgil and Scott today."

Steve sat down in another chair. "Hard not to."

"Is Virgil right? Does Scott have a problem?" Jeff asked.

Steve sighed and grew thoughtful for a few minutes. "Virgil's correct about one thing, we do have drugs missing from the locker." He held up a hand to stem Jeff's outburst. "However, you're all pretty free with that sort of thing around here. Half the time the kit isn't even locked, or if it is, you all know where the key is. Alan's been poking in there since the fire, popping ibuprofen like it's candy."

Jeff frowned. "Why?"

"He pulled a muscle in his knee. You haven't noticed the limp?" Steve asked, surprised.

"Obviously not." Jeff sighed. "Go on."

"Anyway, I wasn't too worried about the situation, Brains told me it's always been this way. But two days ago, Virgil questioned the pill loss and then changed the locks. He, Brains and myself are the only ones who have the combination." Steve met Jeff's gaze fearlessly. "And that's the way it's going to stay."

Jeff nodded in agreement. "So you **do** think Scott has a problem."

Steve shrugged. "There's something going on there, I just don't know what." Steve sighed. "Scott's the only one I _haven't_ been able to get close to. Virgil, Gordon, even Alan have all become if not friends, then close acquaintances. Scott, he's a tough nut to crack."

"Really?" Jeff frowned. "I would have said that except for Gordon, Scott's the most outgoing of my boys. Interesting…"

"You want my opinion? I think he's in more pain from that shoulder than he wants us to know. It's been nearly two months since the…incident. He won't let Virgil or me within ten feet of him, and Kyrano mentioned that he was complaining after the fire."

Jeff got to his feet and slowly paced the room. "Why didn't you tell me?" He asked finally.

"I guess I assumed you knew. And I'm the new guy around here. You've been a team-unit your entire lives, I'm the new bug in the system. Gotta see how I work out before I get trusted with anything." Steve replied. "Look Jeff, it doesn't bother me. It's a normal reaction. From everything I'm hearing however, Scott is _not_ acting normal. I really want to take a look at him. A good look. Without any of you around, not even Virgil."

Jeff smiled wryly. "I don't think keeping Virgil away will be a problem. Getting Scott here is another story." Jeff held out his hand, and Steve clasped it warmly. "Thanks Steve. I'll get Scott down here even if I have to hog-tie him to do it."

"Now_ that_, I'd like to see." Steve grinned. "Get some rest Jeff. You can talk to Gordon in the morning."

Jeff nodded and left, heading upstairs. He paused in front of Alan's room, and quietly opened the door. Alan lay in his customary sprawl, the blanket strewn about him in a tangled mess. Jeff made himself a mental note to ask Alan about his knee in the morning, then closed the door and moved down the hallway.

Scott's room was next. His eldest son was dead asleep, propped up in a sitting position, his right arm resting across his chest. Jeff sighed as he watched his son's chest move up and down. He shut the door and moved on to Virgil.

When he peered into Virgil's room, he wasn't too surprised to find the bed empty. Know his middle son's usual haunt, Jeff made his way to the studio. Quietly opening the door, he stepped inside, surprised to find it dark. He heard a noise out on the balcony, and carefully stepping around the stacks of canvases, went to join his son.

He found Virgil at the far end of the terrace, looking out over the ocean. The moon had risen and was reflecting across the waves. "You're up late." Jeff commented.

Virgil shrugged. "Couldn't sleep." He gazed upwards. "Hard to believe she's still up there."

Jeff followed his gaze. "I was thinking we could go up in a few days. John and Brains think they know what the problem is."

Virgil nodded. "That's good. It wasn't pretty at the rescue today, with the translation delays and stuff." He reached down and pulled a beer out of a small cooler at his feet. "Want one?"

"Sure. Thanks." Jeff took the bottle and taking a pull, made a face. "Yuck. I don't know how you three drink this stuff." He shuddered.

"Guinness is an acquired taste."

"Guess I haven't acquired it yet." Jeff frowned as Virgil took another deep swallow.

Virgil caught the look. "I'm not John Dad. I've been nursing this one for a while now. There's only one more in the cooler."

"Sorry son." They stood quietly, looking out over the waves.

"I talked to Steve." Jeff said, a few minutes later.

"About?"

"Scott."

"I see." Virgil nodded thoughtfully. "And what did the esteemed Dr. Macleod have to say?"

"That there's something wrong with your brother, but he's not sure what. He thinks it's his shoulder, that it's still bothering him." Jeff answered.

"I could have told you that." Virgil reached for his pocket and pulled out his cigarettes. Lighting one, he took a long drag and ignored his father's black look. "I'm a grown man Dad. I only smoke when I'm stressed. And right now, I'm stressed."

"I don't have to like it."

"No, you don't. But at this point, I think me having a few cigarettes is the least of our problems." He inhaled and blew out the smoke. "What's really on your mind Dad?"

Jeff raised an eyebrow at Virgil. "What do you mean?"

Virgil shrugged. "You came out here looking for some one to talk to. You're pretty obvious you know."

"Oh am I?"

"Yep. So, what's up?"

Jeff sighed. "I talked to John. I thought he should know about Gordon."

Virgil nodded. "Yeah, he should." He glanced at his father's morose expression. "I take it the conversation didn't go well?"

"You can say that again." Jeff sighed. "He was drunk again."

Virgil shook his head. "You can't help him Dad, not until he helps himself."

"I know. But that's not all. He got real ugly with me. Threw more accusations about me sending him away, how I wanted Scott more than him, that sort of thing." Jeff leaned against the railing. "I got tired of being his scapegoat and threw back a few shots of my own."

"Good. It's about time he heard how angry you are. I guess Gordon lit into him already once too." He took another pull from his cigarette.

Jeff nodded. "Scott told me." He sighed again. "When I was watching the news tonight, they mentioned a rip-tide rescue off of Cape Cod. Five kids got swept out. John handled it. He got them to shore."

Virgil looked up in surprise. "What! Are you sure it was him?"

"Pretty sure. They mentioned that a man named John, no last name, organized the whole thing. What I don't understand is that if he helped save those kids, what in God's name put him in such a foul mood?" Jeff shook his head wearily.

"Have you looked at the date today Dad?" Virgil asked, staring out at the horizon.

Jeff looked up, surprised at the question. "No, why?"

"It's been three months today since Hood first attacked the station." Virgil replied quietly.

Jeff started. "My God, I never thought of that. Damn…" He said softly.

Virgil shrugged and crushed out his cigarette on the railing. "I didn't realize it until Alan told me. Guess I just want to forget it ever happened."

"Don't we all." They stood quietly for a few minutes. "When did you talk to Alan?"

Virgil finished his beer and dropped the empty bottle into the cooler. "He stopped by a little while ago. He's pretty freaked out about what happened."

"I should talk to him."

Virgil shook his head. "Wait a bit Dad. He's pretty upset. He thinks he screwed up and he's the reason Gordon got hurt." He glanced over at his father.

"It wasn't his fault." Jeff said softly.

Virgil tried to keep the triumph out of his voice. "That's what I told him."

Jeff turned to stare out at the ocean again. "Virgil, I'm sorry." He said quietly.

Virgil looked up at his father. "Sorry? For what?"

"For everything. If I had just done one last sweep of that diamond mine, I would have found Hood, and none of this would have ever happened." Jeff sighed wearily. "I've lost so much, John, Penny…I wonder if it's all been worth it."

Virgil frowned. This wasn't what he expected from his father. "Dad, if there's one thing you've always drilled into our heads is that we can't save everyone. How many times have you said that?"

Jeff nodded. "I know…"

"And that's what Ireminded Alan too."

Jeff looked up at his son. "When did you talk to Alan?"

"He stopped by a little while ago. He's pretty upset Dad." Virgil turned to his father. "I assured him that he did the right thing, and that the accident **wasn't** his fault." There was a hint of challenge to his voice.

Jeff nodded. "No, it wasn't his fault. I'll talk to him in the morning. How's his knee?"

"Better. He told you?"

Jeff shook his head. "Seems like all my sons have secrets from me." He said softly.

"Dad…" Virgil sighed and silence settled over them. "Dad, what happened with you and Penny?" He asked a few minutes later.

Jeff stared out over the ocean. "I asked her to marry me."

Virgil's hazel eyes lit up. "That's great!"

"She said no."

"Dad…I'm sorry." He placed a comforting hand on Jeff's shoulder.

"She told me she couldn't, she was my agent, and that there were things she had to do where she couldn't be married in order to accomplish." Jeff sighed. "I was angry and walked out."

"Have you tried calling her?"

Jeff nodded. "She won't answer. I want…I _need_ to fix things but I don't know how."

"John would know." Virgil said quietly.

"Yes, he probably would." Jeff grew quiet again. "Virgil, I want to ask you something and I want you to answer me truthfully. Do you regret me bringing you to live here, having you work for International Rescue?"

Now it was Virgil's turn to grow still. "I think 'regret' is too strong a word." He said at last. "I mean yeah, sometimes I wish we had stayed in Kansas, that I would have had a 'normal' upbringing. It would have been nice to go to my senior prom, to graduate with my class, to go on a date once in a while…" He turned and smiled softly at his father. "But then I get to save this little girl from a fire, and the rest of that just doesn't seem important anymore."

Jeff's throat was tight with emotion as he pulled his son into a hug. "Virgil…" He said hoarsely.

Virgil pulled back and smiled softly. "It's how we all feel Dad. Even John. He's talked to me about it."

"When?"

Virgil shrugged. "About a year ago. After a particularly harrowing rescue. And I'll bet he's done the same for the others." He sighed. "Think we should go to Boston and get him?"

Jeff shook his head. "Much as I want to, I think that would be a bad idea. He's making a new life there Virgil. He seems pretty serious about this Christa."

Virgil turned back out to look over the balcony. "I kinda figured that." He grew quiet again. "Dad, do you believe me about Scott now? That he has a problem."

"I don't know what to believe at this point son. There is something wrong with Scott, I'm just not sure what. And neither is Steve. He wants to examine your brother. See if he can figure out what's going on."

"I _know_ what's going on." Virgil muttered.

"Virgil enough."

"Dad, look—"

Jeff interrupted him. "Son, you've barely stepped foot into the infirmary since the incident with John. What's really bothering you?"

Virgil's shoulders slumped. "I don't know…I guess I'm afraid of screwing up again." He said quietly.

"You didn't screw up Virgil." Jeff said firmly.

"Yes, I did. If I had just noticed John's condition in the first place, all this would never have happened."

"And if John hadn't been such an idiot and told us how much he had been hurt, we probably wouldn't be having this conversation at all." Jeff turned and looked deep into his son's amber eyes. "You handled more that day than I ever thought any of us would have had to. You stepped up and took command, giving Alan the support and confidence he needed to get his job done. All the while saving John's life. If anyone is to blame it's Hood. So I don't want to hear anymore about you screwing up understand?" Jeff's tone booked no argument.

Virgil gulped and nodded. "Yes sir."

"Good." Jeff turned and looked back over the sea. "What a beautiful night. Seems like I never get the chance to just look around anymore."

"You work too hard Dad."

"I know. It's what's keeping me sane at the moment."

Virgil glanced at his father. It never occurred to him that he too was suffering the aftereffects of all that had happened. "Dad?"

Jeff smiled thinly. "It's OK Virgil. I'm handling it."

"If you say so." He was quiet for a few minutes. "Dad? I…I want to apologize for my behavior lately."

"Oh?"

Virgil blushed. "I've been a little…stressed. My…language hasn't been all that polite, and I'm sorry."

Jeff hid his smile. "I've been meaning to talk to you about that. Alan and I remarked that we didn't realize you knew that many swear words."

Virgil chuckled softly. "Yeah, I guess I have been kinda crass. I'm sorry." He sighed. "And I guess I could have handle Scott better."

Jeff arched an eyebrow at his son. "You think?"

Virgil shrugged. "My temper's been kinda thin too I guess."

"We've all been under alot of pressure Virgil."

"Yeah but, I shouldn't have hit him."

Jeff smiled. "You five have been solving problems with your fists since the day you were born. I don't expect it to stop now."

Virgil sighed. "Still…I'm sorry for everything Dad."

Jeff draped an arm across his son's shoulders. "Apology accepted. Now, it's getting late and I want to get up to TB 5 within a day or two, so get some rest."

"As long as you go to bed too." Virgil stated firmly.

"I'll be right behind you."

"Dad, are you going to tell John? Even planet side, we could use his help."

Jeff shrugged. "I was going to but…"

"Why don't you let me do it? I'm the only one he's not pissed off at for the moment. I'll send him an email and see what happens." Virgil paused at the doorway and grinned. "Besides, the Royals are starting a three game series against the Sox. Night Dad." With a jaunty wave, Virgil left his father staring out over the sea.


	19. Chapter 19

I don't own Thunderbirds or it's characters, just the ones I invented! Enjoy!

* * *

John glared down at the message in his email inbox.

**Hey there Cap'n Canary!**

**How are things in Beantown? Heard you got yourself a girl. Is she hot? When do we see pictures? And how'd _you_ manage to snag her anyway!**

**All's well here in paradise. Gordon's doing better, he was actually stumbling around a bit this morning, and complaining about not being able to go in the pool. Anywho, Dad, Alan and I are headed up to TB 5 in a day or two to try and finish up the repairs. We could sure use your expertise. In fact, I'm begging you, please, _please_, don't leave me alone with Dad, Alan and Brains! I may go rather noisily insane!**

**Seriously, we could use the help. Take care John.**

**Virgil**

**P.S. Royals-8 Red Sox-2. Sad, John, just sad. When are you going to get yourself a real team? **

"I'll give him a real team." John muttered darkly as he typed back a reply.

**Hey Mozart,**

**Real team my ass. We _let_ you win. Can't embarrass you in front of the home fans after all. Wait until today's game, you'll see.**

**Sure, I'll see what I can do to help out from my end. I have a few theories, but no promises though. Just one thing, please don't let Alan blow her up.**

**Heard you were trying something new with your hair. Are you really _that_ in love with your 'bird? And, when do I get pictures?**

**John**

John laughed as he hit send then leaned back in his chair, thinking. _If I was right about the power modulator, then fixing her should be a snap._ _And if I'm wrong…_He suppressed a shudder, _well, let's just hope I'm not._

He got to his feet and walked downstairs to the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of juice. He glanced outside. It was a beautiful day, sunny and warm. He sighed and picked up his cell phone, automatically starting to dial Christa's number. Pausing, he scowled and hung up before it connected and shoved the phone into his pocket. Grabbing his keys, he marched out the door.

When John returned a few hours later, he was whistling and there was a smile on his face. He tossed a small bag on the hall table and glanced at the answering machine. His smile faded as he saw there were no messages. He pulled a beer out of the refrigerator and went up to the roof terrace. He leaned against the railing, sipping his drink and watching the traffic below him.

* * *

"_Easy V-Virgil, you should be almost on t-t-top of it."_ Brains called out over the radio.

Virgil cautiously floated over to the main power coupling. "Dad? I'm here."

"Right behind you son." Jeff made his way to his son's side. "How you doing?"

Virgil grimaced, knowing his father couldn't see him behind the tempered glass of the helmet. "I'll be better once we get this over with." He peered down at the machinery. "Are you sure this is the place John? I don't see anything."

"_I'm sure. The box is attached to one of the main cables." _John replied.

"Hold on, let me take a look." Jeff eased himself down under the edge of the space station. "I can see the…whatever it is." He stretched his hand out, then pulled back shaking his head. "I can't reach it, I'm too big. Virgil, you're going to have to go in there."

"Terrific." Virgil waited for his father to move out of the way before he edged his way down. "OK sunshine, talk me through this."

"_Call me 'sunshine' once more, and I let you figure it out yourself." _John shot back.

Virgil laughed. "Sorry brother-mine, I bow to your superior expertise."

"_You can kiss my feet later to make up for it. Now let's get a move on."_

Jeff smiled at his son's banter. It almost seemed like old times. He wondered how long it would last. He got his answer a moment later.

"You seem like you're in a hurry Johnny, big date tonight?" Virgil quipped.

John's voice instantly turned cold. _"My private life is none of your concern."_

Virgil frowned at his elder brother's tone. "Sorry John, I was just kidding around."

There was a pause before John spoke again, all business. _"OK Vigil, tell me exactly what wires the box is attached to."_

Virgil sighed and peered down at the box. "It seems to be stuck to the input/output lines."

"_Hmmm…"_ Virgil could hear John tapping away at the keyboard. _"Hold on a sec."_

"What if I were to just pry—"

"**_NO!"_** Both Brains and John shouted at the same time, startling Virgil. He let go of Thunderbird 5 and started floating upwards. Jeff grabbed his son's arm and pulled him back.

"Easy Virgil, I've got you." Jeff told him.

Virgil nodded his thanks. "Some one want to explain what the ruckus was all about?" He asked shortly.

"_There's a ch-ch-chance it could be a b-b-explosive device."_ Brains answered.

"A bomb? This thing is a damn bomb! Are you kidding me?" Virgil instantly backed away, swallowing the nausea that rose up in his throat.

"_Now V-V-Virgil, if we do this properly, we can g-g-get it done without detonating the device."_

"Easy for you to say, I'm the one out here with this thing." Virgil muttered under his breath.

"I'm right behind you son. We'll do it together." Jeff squeezed his son's shoulder in encouragement.

Virgil nodded and turned back to the device. "OK, so what _do_ I do?"

"_Back off a bit so I can see it again."_ John answered. Virgil adjusted the camera attached to his helmet. _"Thanks. Now carefully pry the cover off."_

"Carefully he says…" Virgil could feel the sweat beading up on his forehead. He pulled at the edge of the device until its silver cover came off. He barely glanced after it as it floated past. "It's off."

John was quiet a few seconds. _"Hmmm…It's not as bad as I thought it would be."_

"So this means I'm _not_ going to be blown to kingdom come?"

"_I didn't say that."_

Jeff cut into the conversation. "John, can we please turn out attention back to the task at hand?"

"_Sorry Dad. Virgil, see that green wire? That's the ground. Don't touch it. It's keeping the unit stable."_

"Green, don't touch. Got it."

"_That red one is another story. That's a 'hot' wire."_

"What's a hot wire?"

"_Usually th-th-that's the main explosive w-w-wire."_ Brains responded.

"_Don't touch that one either."_ John added.

"So if I can't touch the green wire, or the red wire, what can I do?" Virgil's tone held a hint of irritation in it.

"Easy Virgil." Jeff said.

Virgil took a shuddering breath. "I'm fine."

"_See the blue wire? Cut it."_ John told him.

Virgil swallowed thickly. "Just like that? Cut it?"

"_Yes. Trust me Virgil."_

"Here goes nothing." Virgil said a silent prayer to himself, and taking a deep breath, cut the wire. He clenched his eyes shut and waited for something to happen. When nothing did, he cautiously opened his eyes and sighed. "Well, that worked."

"_Told you."_ John responded. _"Now, before you get too cocky, tell me what else you see."_

Virgil carefully pushed aside the remaining wires. "It looks like there's another smaller box inside this one."

"_Shit."_

"John." Jeff said instantly.

"_Sorry Dad. Brains?"_

"_If I h-h-had to hazard a guess, I would say that's the b-b-explosive."_ The scientist replied.

Virgil recoiled. "And I have to disarm it before we can get it off Five?"

"_Yes."_ Both John and Brains answered.

"Great." Virgil sighed. "Well, since it seems I have no choice, now what?"

"_How many wires lead into the box? I can't see it."_ John asked.

Virgil bent down closer. "Looks like three. They're all the same color."

"_Sh—crap."_

"I heard that." Jeff interceded.

They could both hear John sigh. _"Brains, any ideas?"_

"_Thinking John."_

"Could you guys think a little faster please?" Virgil swallowed back the bile in his throat.

"_Sorry Virg. OK, let's forget the bomb for a minute and get back to the other wires. Cut the black one."_

"You sure?"

"_I'm sure. Cut it."_

Virgil didn't hesitate and cleanly snapped the wire in two. "John! It's moving! The damn box is moving!" Virgil back-pedaled as fast as he could, colliding into his father.

"_VIRGIL!" _John shouted. _"Relax! You merely cut the magnetic couplings. See if it comes off."_

Virgil took a shuddering breath as he and his father stared at the box. "Nothing's happening Johnny."

"Wait. Look." Jeff pointed towards the box. It seemed to have moved. Virgil tapped it gently with his finger and it floated off Thunderbird 5 and hovered near them.

"OK John, it's off. Now what do I do with it?" Virgil asked.

"_Let it go."_

"_J-J-John, you can't do that. What if it connects s-s-somewhere else?"_ Brains said.

"_So? As long as it's away from my…from Thunderbird 5 I don't really give a damn. Let some one else deal with it."_ John's tone was icy cold.

"John, that's enough. Virgil, put it in here." Jeff held a small canister in his hands. Virgil carefully placed the box inside. "We're headed back in John. Talk to you then."

"_FAB Dad."_ John cut his connection.

"Come on Virgil, we're done here." Together Jeff and Virgil made their way to the airlock. Once inside, they waited a moment for the gravity to adjust, then went into the main living area of the station

Alan was there waiting for them. "Hey, thought you guys were never coming in." He grinned at his brother, but his smile faded at Virgil's reply.

"Just help me get this helmet off me before I throw up on your feet."

Alan quickly unfastened the helmet and Virgil rushed to the bathroom, not bothering to take off the rest of his uniform. Alan turned and helped his father out of the bulky helmet and spacesuit. He winced at the sounds coming from the bathroom. "I used to think Gordon and Scott were just kidding around about Virg."

Jeff shook his head. "Nope. That's why he never pulls an extended stay up here." He looked over as Virgil, looking decidedly green, came back in. "Everything alright son?"

Virgil smiled thinly. "Just peachy Dad."

"Let's get this to Brains and see what's going on." Jeff led the way to the main control room. Brains was sitting at the computer, typing in commands. "How's it going Brains?"

The scientist didn't look up. "Working on it Mr-Mr-Jeff. John, t-t-try it again." A moment later, the station lit up like a Christmas tree.

"_How's that?"_

"P-Power is holding John."

There was a pause. _"And now?"_ John's face appeared on the view screen.

"Hello John." Jeff stepped forward.

"_Hey Dad. You're in. Virgil done puking yet?"_

"Shut up canary boy." Virgil snapped.

John grinned. _"Guess that answers that question. Everything looks clear on my end Brains."_

"_Looks good down here too."_ Scott replied from Tracy Island.

"We have green a-a-across the boards. Power is stable and h-h-holding." Brains turned to Jeff. "Thunderbird 5 is back in business."

Virgil winced as Alan let out a whoop of excitement. "Don't get too excited there pal, we've still got a bomb on board."

Alan sobered immediately and glanced at the box on the counter. "What do we do with it?"

"We'll take it down to the island and dispose of it." Jeff told him. "Scott, what kind of power readings are you getting?"

"_According to Fermat here, you guys are running at 98.6 percent."_

"_Not bad…Brains, try adjusting the amps from the life support."_ John said.

"Working on it n-n-now." Brains punched in a few commands to the computer.

"**Thunderbird 5 is online. Welcome back John."**

Everyone laughed at John's blush on the vid-screen. _"Thanks 5. Brains, run a compete diagnostic. Make sure that thing left no traces of itself."_

"Good id-id-thought. It should take thirty-six hours or so to com-com-finish the test." Brains told them.

His stomach churning again, Virgil turned to his father. "Please don't tell me we're staying here until everything is up and running?"

Jeff tore his gaze from the computer to see Virgil's stricken expression. "I was going to, but I can see you're ready to leave. Alan, let's pack up. Brains, you'll be OK for a day or two?"

The scientist nodded. "I'll be fine M-M-M-Jeff."

"Dad?"

Jeff turned. Alan stood, his weight shifting from one foot to the other. "Could I…I mean, I can stay and help."

Jeff tired to keep the surprise out of his voice. "You want to stay?"

Alan nodded. "If Brains doesn't mind." He shrugged. "There's plenty to do. I'm not the programmer Brains, John and Fermat are, but I can do other stuff to help. Please Dad?"

Jeff glanced at Brains who smiled and nodded. "Fine Alan. We'll come get you both in a couple of days."

Alan's face lit up with happiness. "Thanks Dad!"

"It's not all fun and games Alan. I expect you to do whatever Brains asks you too." Jeff said sternly.

"I will Dad."

Jeff smiled. "FAB Alan. Scott, John, we're heading out. Good luck."

"_See you in a couple of hours Dad."_ Scott signed off.

"_I'll give Brains a hand from this end. Maybe we can wrap this up sooner than later."_ John told them.

"Don't hurry on my account! I don't want to have to leave early!" Alan protested.

Virgil rolled his eyes. "You're insane Alan. Certifiably insane." Then he grinned. "Have fun and good luck." He glanced to make sure their father was out of earshot and beckoned his brother closer. "Don't forget to call Tin-Tin later for a good night kiss." He winked.

Alan's face reddened and his hands clenched into fists at his side. "I don't know what you're talking about." He said shortly.

"Sure you don't. See ya Sprout." Virgil ruffled Alan's hair and with a wave to Brains, he and Jeff made their way to Thunderbird 3.

Soon the giant red ship broke away from the space station and headed towards Earth.

They flew in silence, the only noise being the constant whir of the computers. "Virgil? You're pretty quiet. You still feeling sick?" Jeff asked when the silence had gone on too long.

Virgil started. "What? No, I'm OK Dad."

"Want me to drive?"

Virgil sighed, then surprised his father by nodding. "Yeah, take her." He lifted his hands off the controls.

Jeff glanced at his middle son in puzzlement. Virgil had his eyes closed and was pinching the bridge of his nose as if he had a headache. "Virgil?"

"I wish I had a cigarette." He smiled ruefully at his father's stern expression. "Just kidding Dad." He sighed. "What are you going to do about Scott?"

"Virgil, we've been through this. Steve is going—"

"Yeah, yeah, Steve's going to take a look at him. Well, has he?" Jeff avoided his son's glance. Virgil stared at his father. "He hasn't because Scott won't go, right?"

Jeff nodded slowly. "Your brother is insisting that he's fine."

"He's _not_ fine." Virgil stated flatly, folding his arms across his chest.

"Steve told me he changed the locks on the med-cabinet." Jeff said, changing the subject.

"Yes, I did. And he and I are the only ones who have the combination."

Jeff nodded again. "I think that's a good idea."

Virgil looked at his father in surprise. "You do?"

"I think you're right. There _is_ something wrong with Scott. But I don't think it's as bad as you seem to think it is however." Jeff frowned a little. "Back in Sydney, after the incident with the Hood, the doctor told me that the surgery had been tricky. There were alot of bone fragments to put back together. He thought he had managed to repair the damage, but wanted Scott to see a specialist at a later date. When your brother appeared to be having no problems, I guess it just sort of slipped my mind." Jeff sighed. "I just want this whole thing to be over and let us get back to the way we were."

Virgil looked up quickly, hearing the distress in his father's voice. _He's suffering too. Why didn't I see that before?_ "Dad?"

Jeff shook his head. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"This has been hard on all of us Dad. Remember a couple months ago, when you thought we should see a shrink? Maybe…maybe we should."

"I have been." Jeff replied quietly.

Virgil's eyes widened in surprise. "What? Who…When?"

"Over the vid. The same person I wanted us all to see. He still thinks that would be a good idea by the way."

Virgil grew quiet again. "Does he know about…us?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Virgil digested that information for a moment. "Then, you told him what happened? And about John?"

"Yes." Jeff said again. "And I told him about Penny…and your mother."

Virgil gaped openly at his father. If it was one thing they _never_ talked about, it was Lucille Tracy. "Y-You talked about Mom?"

Jeff nodded. "Yes." He didn't seem inclined to say any more so Virgil dropped the subject and they flew the rest of the way home in silence.


	20. Chapter 20

Many thanks to Bluegrass for her help with parts of this chapter. Hope you're all still enjoying this.

* * *

Scott sighed in relief as he watched Thunderbird 3 undock from the space station. _Unless they push it, they should be here in about three hours._ He yawned and got to his feet, stretching carefully. "You all set here Fermat?"

The young man barely looked up from the computer he was working on. "I'll be f-f-OK Scott. Just working on re-establishing the m-m-main power links."

"I'll leave you to it then." With a wave, Scott left and headed outside to the terrace, stopping a moment to grab a bottle of water from the kitchen. He gingerly sat down on a chaise, and closed his eyes.

Gordon was doing better, doing a round of physical therapy at the moment. Steve had assured them all that there would be no lasting effects from the accident. _Though to hear Virgil talk, I sent both Alan and Gordon in there on purpose. Grounded…_

His shoulder sent a wave of pain and sat up gasping. "Dammit!" Carefully massaging the affected area, he sighed. _Bloody thing still hurts. You'd think it would be better by now. Bet John's ribs aren't bothering him anymore._ He scowled at the thought of his brother. _So I take a few painkillers once in a while. At least I'm not drinking myself senseless every night._ He stumbled to his feet and headed inside, intending to look for something to help with the pain. _Med-locker is locked all of a sudden, and Virgil turned Steve against me so I can't ask **him** for anything either. Son of a bitch this hurts…_He was just passing his father's office when the proximity alarm went off.

Bolting inside, he quickly scanned the computer screen. Kyrano came rushing in a moment later.

"Who is it?" The man asked.

Scott shook his head. "Not sure yet. Tracy Island to unidentified craft. You are trespassing in private airspace, please change your course immediately. Do you copy?"

There was no answer. Scott looked up at Kyrano and tried again. "Unknown craft, do you copy?"

There was sill no answer. Scott felt a chill despite the tropical warmth. He pressed a button on the desk, and a screen popped up on the computer.

"**The system is now armed."**

Scott looked up a Kyrano again and took a deep breath, his finger on the button. "This is Tracy Island, identify yourself at once or we will be forced to take extreme measures."

The radio crackled and a familiar sounding British accent came across the airwaves. _"Now Scott dear, is that any way to speak to me?"_

Scott sat back in relief, a grin spreading across his face. "Penny, it's been a long time." He watched as the pink Lear jet came into view. "Go ahead and have Parker land on the strip. We're not anticipating anything for a while."

"_Very good. I shall see you shortly."_

"FAB Penny." Scott quickly disarmed the defense system and sighed, watching the jet circle around to the runway. "Well, isn't this going to be an interesting reunion." Kyrano placed a comforting hand on Scott's good shoulder. Scott took a shuddering breath. "I don't know how much longer I can do this Kyrano. We should be coming together for each other, not drifting father apart. John should be _here_, not gallivanting around Boston. Dammit! Can't he see how much we need him? How much **I **need him?" He put his head in his hands.

"Scott." Scott looked up at Kyrano in surprise. The man never called them by their first names. "You have borne your brother's burdens for many days. But now it is time to look inside yourself. You cannot bear another man's pain, until you first deal with your own." Kyrano observed with his usual serene insight.

Scott shook his head. "I can't…" He said hoarsely. "I just can't."

Kyrano forced Scott to look up at him. "It is not a weakness to understand your own pain. Pain, whether it is physical or emotional, it must be dealt with for the healing to begin. Sometimes, our pain can be so great that we cannot deal with it on our own. It is not weakness to ask for help, but rather it is a strength. Mister Scott, this a strength I know you posses if you will only allow yourself to see it."

Scott shook his head and looked away. "Kyrano…"

The elderly manservant went on as if he hadn't heard. "And as for John, you cannot live another man's life for him, each man must walk his own path. You must start with yours." He continued with his sagely wisdom.

Scott sighed and his gaze went to the mural on the wall, showing his father and brothers, all standing around the pool. Behind it, he knew, were the alcoves leading to the Thunderbird silos. "We've made it through so much together. I guess I thought that nothing could ever tear us apart."

Kyrano followed his gaze. "Think of your family like this island. There are many tracks through the jungle. They may separate for a while, they may criss-cross, or they may come together, but eventually Mister Scott, all tracks lead back to this house. So, think of yourself and your brothers like these tracks, and do not worry where they start on their journey but where they will end."

Scott smiled. "Thanks Kyrano."

"None are needed. Your family is my family. When one is hurting, we all are. And that is something the animal that calls himself my brother will never understand." He squeezed Scott's shoulder one last time, and with a bow, left the room.

Scott pondered what the Malaysian man had said, so deep in thought he never heard Penny enter the room.

She stood in the doorway, shocked at the sight before her. Scott was always one of the neatest men she had ever known, other than Virgil. But now he had changed. His hair was longer than she had ever seen him wear it, falling almost to the nape of his neck. He wore a faded pair of denim cut-offs, and his shirt was loose and unbuttoned, showing how thin he had gotten. But all that wasn't what bothered her the most. It was his face. His skin was pale, and bore the stubble of someone who hadn't shaved in a few days. There were deep, dark circles under his eyes, and lines of what she guessed where pain, etched on his forehead.

"Scott?" She called out softly.

He started and turned. "Penny…"

There was such heartbreak in his voice that she swiftly crossed the room and took him in her arms. He resisted at first, then relaxed in her grip. "God…I've missed you." He said hoarsely.

She smiled and softly stroked his hair. "Scott, what a lovely thing to say."

Scott looked up at her and smiled. "Still into pink I see."

She laughed. "You devil, is there any other color?" She glanced warily around the office.

"He's not here."

She turned back, her eyes guarded. "Oh?"

"Dad and Virgil were up on Five, trying to get her back online. They're on their way back home now."

Penny frowned. "It's still not working? I would have thought John would have his 'bird up and running by now."

Scott sighed. "John's not here. He left almost two months ago."

Penny was stunned. "Left? Left where?"

Scott shook his head. "He's living in Boston. Quit IR, quit us, quit everything." There was more than a touch of bitterness in his voice.

"Oh Scott…I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "Don't be. He made his choice. The rest of us just have to learn to live with it." Scott's grey eyes flashed with emotion.

"Scott, what happened?"

He shook his head and got to his feet, wincing. "Nothing. You may want to go down to the infirmary and see Gordon. There was an accident during our last rescue and he threw his back out."

Penny frowned, sensing there was more to the story than Scott was letting on. "I shall do that."

Scott paused at the door and turning back, smiled wryly. "It is good to see you Pen."

"It's good to be seen. Please do not tell your father I'm here. I'd like to tell him myself."

Scott nodded. "FAB." Then he was gone.

Penny glanced around Jeff's office for a few moments, then followed Scott out the door.

* * *

John hit one last key on his computer and sighed. "That's all I can do Brains."

"_I-I-I think I can finish up. Thanks for your hel-hel-assistance John."_

"No problem. Let me know if there's anything else I can do."

"_FAB John."_

Alan's face appeared on the screen and John smiled. "Hey Sprout."

"_John! This place is great! Can I check out the zero-g room?"_ Alan's blue eyes were bright with excitement.

John laughed. "Be my guest, just don't throw up all over it."

Alan made a face. _"My name's not Virgil."_

"That's for sure. I've got to run Alan. Take care of my—of Thunderbird 5."

"_FAB. Talk to you soon!"_ Alan closed the channel and John sat back in his chair, staring at the empty screen. He sighed. _It's been three days. You'd think she would have called._ He got to his feet and made his way downstairs. He walked into the living room and started towards the liquor cabinet. He pulled out a bottle of whiskey, then paused staring at it, his father's voice echoing in his head.

"_**You're drunk."**_

Very deliberately, John placed the bottle on the counter and took a step back.

"_Not thirsty John?"_

John started and he looked around the empty room. "You're not here."

"_But I am here John. Here, inside you."_

John shook his head. "No, you're not. You're in London, in prison."

"_My body yes, but my mind is free."_

"I don't have to listen to you." John started from the room.

"_You enjoy being alone don't you John."_

John froze at the door. "Please, just stop. Please."

"_But John, I'm the only one who cares about you. Has your precious Christa called to see how you are faring? No. And your family? You're good enough to fix Thunderbird 5, yet have they thanked you?"_

John closed his eyes and his fists clenched at his sides. "No." He whispered.

"_Yet I am here. Here to help you."_

"Help me how?"

"_I can be your friend John."_

"You tried to kill me."

"_That was before. Are we not all entitled to a few mistakes? I am only human after all."_

John snorted as he walked back to the bar. "Yeah right. Murder is always forgivable." He swallowed a large shot of whiskey.

"_I am truly sorry John."_

"Sure you are."

"_I am here now am I not? Begging your forgiveness. Has your family done that? Has Gordon apologized for the things he said to you?"_

John closed his eyes against the memories.

"_**Maybe if you had a set of balls on you and had fired at the missile, we wouldn't have thought you were dead in the first place." Gordon retorted hotly.**_

_**John's eyes narrowed angrily. "That's right, this was my fault. As the resident 'liability' it's not really a surprise the way I acted, now isn't it?" **_

"_**He's been moping around for two weeks now and I'm sick of it! Grow up!" Gordon snapped. "All this drama because Blondie here is too afraid to go back to his Thunderbird."**_

"Gordon's a jerk." John said, taking another drink.

"_And Scott, has he come to your defense?"_

John sighed. "No."

"_**You've been checking up on me?" John's voice was deadly calm. "How? Through my communicator or Steve?"**_

"_**John it's not like that!"**_

"_**What is it then Scott? You and Dad think I need a babysitter? That I'm not capable of taking care of myself?"**_

"_**Maybe if you weren't drinking yourself into an early grave we wouldn't have to check on you!" Scott retorted hotly.**_

John put his head in his hands, the bottle falling to the floor. "Please…stop…"

"_And Christa?"_

"**_You arrogant son of a…" She marched over and stood toe to toe with him, her small frame barely reaching his shoulders. The fury in her voice made her seem larger however, as she poked John in the chest. "I know I am not your mother and I don't appreciate that remark. I am merely looking out for you, something that you're apparently not capable of doing."_**

"_**I can look after myself just fine thank you."**_

"_**Yeah, you've done a great job so far. Let's see, the plane crash, the World Police raid, jogging, a bar fight and a mugging. You're a pro John! Keep up the good work!"**_

John moaned. "No….She loves me. She was just worried about me…"

"_As your father was worried about you? Did he not go on a rescue instead of looking to see if you were alive? Or did he not want to believe Scott was dead. Did **your** welfare really matter to him?"_

"I…"

"_John, I am sorry for my past actions. Please, I beg you, forgive me."_


	21. Chapter 21

Once again, I don't own the Thunderbirds or their characters, just the ones I made up. Enjoy!

* * *

Virgil took a shuddering breath as Thunderbird 3's engines stopped. "Home… Thank God!"

Jeff smiled. "How I managed to have a son that gets space-sick is beyond me."

Virgil glared at his father. "Love you too Dad."

Jeff chuckled. "C'mon son, let's see what Onaha has for dinner." Together they rode down the elevator. "I think I'm going to hit the shower first."

Virgil nodded in agreement. "Good idea. Onaha hates it when we come to dinner in our uniforms." They talked quietly as they walked down the hallway towards their bedrooms.

Jeff paused in front of Gordon's door. "I think I'll check on your brother. See you in a little while."

Virgil waved. "Tell him I'll see him after I shower."

"Will do." Jeff was turning to knock when the door opened, startling him. "Scott?"

Virgil whirled, his eyes first going to his brother's face, then to the bottle of pills in his hand. Before anyone could react, Virgil shot across the hall, and grabbing Scott, slammed him against the wall. "Stealing your drugs now Scott?"

"Get off my back!" Scott tried to push Virgil away, but his brother refused to budge.

"Give me the pills." Virgil growled, his face inches from Scott. "Don't make me take them from you."

"Try it and you'll lose an arm!" Scott retorted hotly.

"That's enough, both of you." Jeff marched in and separated both his sons. "Scott, hand me the bottle. Now."

Reluctantly, Scott handed the bottle to his father. Jeff glanced down at it and clenched his teeth. They were indeed painkillers and the name on the bottle said "Gordon". He looked up at Scott. "The infirmary. Let's go." He gripped Scott's left arm firmly, and they marched down the hallway.

Steve and Gordon looked up in surprise as Jeff all but dragged Scott into the room, Virgil following close at their heels. "Jeff? What's going on?" Steve asked.

"Scott's here for his physical." Jeff shoved his eldest son forward.

Scott sent his father an icy glare. "I don't need any damned check up."

"Oh no? Then explain to us all why you were stealing your brother's painkillers?"

Scott went white. "I wasn't stealing anything."

"What's this then?" Jeff held up the bottle. "Park your ass down on that table. You're not leaving until we get to the bottom of this."

Scott shrugged free of his father's grip. "No."

Jeff met his son's icy glare fearlessly. "You will sit down and have yourself looked over by Steve, or I pack you on the jet and take you to the mainland. You **will** be examined, where, is up to you."

"Fine. But only Steve. I'm not performing for an audience." Scott snarled. Jeff nodded and Virgil and Gordon slipped out of the room. "You too Dad."

Jeff frowned for a moment. "I'll be outside when you're finished." He said to Steve, then followed his sons out the door.

He found Virgil and Gordon in the lounge, Virgil standing outside on the balcony, hands folded across his chest, staring stonily out at the horizon. Gordon was lying on the couch, his legs propped up under a pillow. "Hey Dad." He said wearily.

Jeff sat down on the chair next to him. "How are you feeling Gordon?"

"Actually, not too bad considering." Then his face fell. "Steve won't let me in the pool yet though. Closest I get is the hot tub."

There was such melancholy in Gordon's voice that Jeff was hard pressed not to laugh. "Just a few more days son."

Gordon sighed. "I know." He was silent a few minutes. "Dad? Was Scott really coming out of my room? With my meds?" Jeff nodded in reply. "Damn."

"Gordon."

Gordon shifted and sat up, wincing a bit. "That's not good Dad."

"I know." Jeff glanced up at Virgil, who hadn't moved. "Virgil was right. Scott has a problem."

Gordon's eyes took on a faraway look. "I know what he's going through." He said softly.

Jeff looked at his son in surprise. "What?"

Gordon closed his eyes. "After my…accident, I became addicted to morphine. Why do you think I stayed an extra two weeks in the hospital?"

Jeff was stunned. This was all new information to him. "Gordon, I…I never knew."

"You weren't supposed to." Gordon looked up at his father, his brown eyes filled with emotion.

"Why? We could have helped you?"

Gordon shook his head and looked down at his feet. "I didn't want you to know. I didn't want you to see how weak I was." He whispered.

Jeff's heart broke. "Gordon…" He carefully took his son in his arms. Gordon resisted a moment, then leaned into his father's embrace.

"Dad?" Jeff looked up into Virgil's concerned features.

"Virgil, Gordon was, ah…" Jeff stammered.

"He knows." Gordon said, sitting up stiffly and brushing his hand across his eyes.

Virgil looked puzzled for a moment, then his eyes widened. "Your morphine thing." Gordon nodded. Virgil knelt down in front of his younger brother and placed a comforting hand on his arm. "It's OK Gords. We won't let it happen again." He told him softly.

Gordon smiled tentatively. "I know." He got stiffly to his feet and limped across the room. Jeff and Virgil watched him for a few minutes, before he turned back to them. "But this isn't about me, it's about Scott. Don't be too rough on him."

Virgil shook his head. "He could have killed you and Alan, Gordon."

"I know that, but it's not all his fault." He took a shuddering breath. "You have no idea how hard it is…How much you _need_ it." He closed his eyes tight. "You'll do almost anything to get the drugs, just to feel normal again. I'm terrified every time my back goes out, that I'll have that need again." He shook the memories away. "So don't be too hard on Scott. Yeah he screwed up. But I'm OK, more or less. He's not."

Before Jeff or Virgil could reply, the intercom beeped. Jeff quickly answered it. "Steve?"

"_Jeff, you better get down here."_

Jeff looked up at his sons. "Go!" Gordon told him. "Fill me in later." Jeff and Virgil hurried from the room.

Steve looked up from the computer as they burst into the room. "Where's Scott?" Jeff demanded looking around.

"I gave him a mild sedative for the pain and sent him to bed. These are Scott's x-rays. Here Virgil, take a look at this." Steve turned the screen so Virgil could look.

Virgil peered down at the screen. "Fuck." He sat limply down in a chair, never tearing his eyes from the computer.

Without missing a beat, Jeff lightly cuffed his middle son on the head. "Language Virgil. What is it?"

Steve pointed to the screen. "Here's where the docs in Sydney repaired the original damage. They did a pretty good job. Too bad Scott's such a terrible patient and didn't keep the arm immobilized." He shook his head. "I wish I could have seen him before the damage progressed this far. I would have been able to do something." Steve sighed helplessly.

Jeff frowned. "I don't understand. What exactly is wrong?"

Virgil tore his gaze from the screen and looked up at his father. "It looks like Scott needs a total shoulder replacement."

"What? Are you sure?"

Both Virgil and Steve nodded. "Fuck." Jeff echoed Virgil's earlier statement. "So, explain this to me."

"See here? There's extensive damage to the clavicle and humerus. He needs to see a specialist."

"You can't do it?"

"No way. I'm fine as a meatball surgeon, but this is way out of my league." Steve looked down at the screen again. "Damn him! If he had just let me see him a month ago!" He got up and paced the room.

"Have you said anything to him?" Jeff asked.

"Yes. He seemed unconcerned about the whole thing. I told him that before we did anything, I wanted to run some more tests."

"He agreed to that?" Virgil asked, surprised.

Steve shrugged. "He was pretty tight-lipped the whole time."

"What about the drugs?" Jeff asked.

Steve sighed. "I'm afraid Virgil was right. Scott's got a problem."

Virgil swallowed the "_I told you!_" on the tip of his tongue. "What do we do about it?" He asked instead.

"There isn't much we can do. I've locked up everything, even the aspirin. I'll be personally administering Gordon's meds. He can contact me at any hour, day or night if he needs something. I'm not risking Scott getting into something he can't handle."

Jeff sighed. _Things just keep getting worse and worse. John, Gordon, Scott, what's next? _He ran his hand through his hair. "So, what do we do?"

"I have a colleague in Boston who's a top orthopedic surgeon. I'll fire off an email to her, with Scott's x-rays and see what she says." Steve held up a hand to stem off Jeff and Virgil's inevitable protests. "I can't fix this. And if we don't take care of it sooner rather than later, he's going to lose total use of the arm. Look, Rosie's the best there is. I won't tell her anything other than the barest medical facts. She won't ask questions."

Jeff frowned thoughtfully for a moment. "Fine. See if we can get him to Boston as soon as possible. If you have to, use the Tracy name as incentive." He turned and marched out of the room, leaving the two men staring after him.

"Wow! Dad _never_ uses his name as influence. Ever." Virgil looked over at Steve. "What do we do about the drugs?"

"He's definitely hooked. But there's nothing I can do. **He** has to be the one who wants help." Steve told him.

Virgil nodded. "So until that happens?"

"I told him to come to me if he's in pain. I'll give him carefully regulated doses. Hopefully we can get him to kick this habit _before_ we send him to Boston."

"Doubt that will happen." Virgil muttered.

Steve nodded in agreement then changed the subject. "So, I hear Alan stayed up on Five?"

"Yeah. Personally I don't think he's ready."

"You guys don't give Alan enough credit." Steve said quietly, turning back to his computer.

"Virgil looked up in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"Alan, he's a good kid and the rest of you don't give him enough credit." Steve turned back to Virgil. "He's been working alongside Fermat and Brains for days, trying to solve the power problem on Five. Granted, he's not the whiz they are, but he does all right." Steve looked Virgil square in the eye. "I read the files on the first…incident. Alan handled himself like a pro. If it wasn't for him, Fermat and Tin-Tin, you'd all be dead."

Virgil nodded, shivering involuntarily at the memory. "I know."

"And this last time." Steve smiled. "Let me tell you, when Thunderbird 1 landed at Hanscom, I was shocked to see a sixteen year old piloting that rocket."

Virgil smiled. "Yeah, he did great didn't he?" Then he sat back down and sighed. "You're right. We always treat Alan like he's a nine year old kid."

"That's one thing he's not."

"I guess with John gone and in all probability not coming back, we need to start thinking of Alan as a real member of this team."

"Yeah, you do."

Virgil got up. "Thanks Steve. You've given me alot to think about. I'm going to hit the shower and grab a bite to eat." He waved as he left the room.


	22. Chapter 22

Insert usual disclaimer here. Sorry this has been late. Up to my armpits in alligators at work. Enjoy!

* * *

"**DING-DONG!"**

John looked up from where he was watching the ball game on TV. "Who could that be?" He got up and opened the door.

A delivery man stood there, clipboard in hand. "John Tracy?"

"Yes?"

"Delivery for you sir. Can you sign here?" It came out "he-ah".

John took the board and hastily signed his name. "What is it anyway?"

The man shrugged. "No idea, but you've got about ten boxes. Ernie! Bring 'em in!"

John stepped back and watched in surprise as the two men unloaded nearly a dozen large boxes in the front hallway. After they had left, he knelt down and examined them. They were plain cardboard boxes, with no return address. John did however, recognize his father's writing on the label. "Weird." He tore open the box.

His curiosity turned to confusion as he pulled out a framed picture of his family. "What the…?" He dug deeper into the box, this time pulling out a small science fair trophy. "This is my stuff from home." Puzzled, he ripped open another box, this one containing his books from the island, and yet another with his clothes. He quickly opened the remaining boxes, stunned to find all his belongings. "What is going on?"

John hurried to the phone and dialed the island.

"_We're sorry, the number you have dialed is no longer in service."_

"What?" John frowned at the phone and dialed again.

"_We're sorry, the num—"_

John slammed down the phone and went into the office. Powering up the computer he quickly hailed Tracy Island. "Hello? Dad? Anyone?" The screen remained blank. "What the hell is this?" He punched a button under the desk and a hand scanner appeared. Taking a deep breath, he pressed his hand to the scanner.

**"_Access denied."_**

"What?" He pressed his hand to it again.

**"_Access denied."_**

"How can access be denied, I wrote the fucking protocol!" He punched in a series of commands. "Op Five to Tracy Island, come in Tracy Island."

**"_Access denied."_**

John slammed his hands on the keyboard. "Dammit! What is going on?" He grabbed the phone again. "Operator, can you please connect me with this number?" He rattled off the number to the island.

"_One moment please…I'm sorry sir, but that is not a working number."_

John swore and smashed the phone down on its cradle. He got up and paced the room, muttering under his breath. "What happened that I can't get through? And why send my stuff?"

"_They don't want you John."_

"Don't you start."

"_I am not starting anything. Merely stating the obvious."_

"I'm not listening to you." John said as he marched down the stairs to the living room.

"_And no one is listening to you, are they John?"_

"Fuck you."

"_Tsk tsk…And I thought we were friends."_

John poured himself a generous shot of whiskey and swallowed it in one gulp. "Keep on thinking that."

"_Now John…"_

John hurled the glass against the wall. "Just leave me alone!"

"_As you wish…"_

John sat up, gasping for breath, his heart pounding in his chest. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and glanced at the clock. _4:30am. Guess I'm done sleeping for the night._ He threw the covers off and walked into the bathroom, splashing water on his face then staring at his haggard reflection in the mirror. _A dream, it was just a dream._

"_Or was it John?"_

John ignored the voice and marched downstairs to the office. He settled himself into the chair and taking a deep breath, dialed the island.

"_Hello?"_

John breathed a sigh of relief that was very nearly a sob. "Dad…"

On the screen Jeff frowned. John was pale with dark circles under his eyes. For the first time in years, Jeff saw stubble on his son's chin. Hearing the near panic in his son's voice, Jeff frowned. _"John, what's wrong?"_

John forced a smile. "Nothing Dad. I…I just wanted to see how Alan was doing up on Five."

Jeff glanced at the clock and did a quick mental calculation, noting it was before dawn on the east coast. _"Your brother's fine. How about you?"_

John sighed and ran a hand over his head. "I'm OK Dad. Just…wanted to check in."

"_John."_

John put his face in his hands. "I…I had a nightmare." He said quietly.

"_What was it about? Tell me son."_

John looked back up at the screen, his eyes so full of anguish that Jeff was hard pressed not to jump up and fly straight to Boston. "You…I…" John shook his head. "It doesn't matter."

"_It does to me."_

John smiled tentatively. "Thanks Dad."

"_Don't know what you're thanking me for, but you're welcome."_ Jeff smiled back._ "I'm only trying to help you John."_

"You have helped Dad, just by letting me leave, waiting until I got my head back on straight again."

"_And is it?"_ Jeff asked, getting a chuckle from John. _"John letting you leave here was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I'm still not entirely convinced it was the right thing."_

"It was Dad. I needed to get away. I wasn't any good to anyone back home, least of all myself."

"_It still doesn't make it any easier."_

"I know Dad." John replied softly. He yawned and stretched, wincing only a little. "I'm going to try and go back to sleep. I'll talk to you later."

"_FAB John." _Jeff was reaching to sign off when John's voice stopped him.

"Dad…I love you."

Jeff's heart nearly stopped and he stared at his son. _"I love you too son."_

John closed the channel and sat back in his chair. He felt as if a huge weight had lifted from his shoulders. He closed his eyes and soon fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

Jeff sat in his desk chair, his eyes wandering from the mural on the wall, to his late wife's picture on his desk.

"Lucy, God I wish you were here. You probably know more than me what's been going on. I've nearly lost John, I'm on my way to losing Scott." He put his head in his hands. "I don't know what to do any more Luce…" His voice trailed off.

"Perhaps I can help?"

Jeff's head snapped up as a figure detached itself from the shadows. "Hello Jeff."

"Penny?" Jeff stared in stunned surprise before rising to his feet and walking over to her. "When did you get here?" He resisted the urge to take her in his arms.

"A few hours ago. Scott told me you were working up on Thunderbird 5. Is she repaired?" Penny edged by Jeff to sit down on the couch.

Jeff followed, sitting across from her. "More or less. We've had some problems getting the computers back online, but John figured it out." He filled her in on what had been going on with the station, and how John had discovered the bomb.

Penny's eyes grew wide. "A bomb? Where is it now?"

"Down in the containment chamber. Brains will detonate it when he gets back."

Penny frowned. "Hood was behind this?"

Jeff nodded. "I'll bet my savings account he's been planning this since we caught him at the Bank of London."

"I'd have to say you were correct." Penny glanced up. "Jeff? Scott told me about John. What happened?"

Jeff sighed and put his face in his hands. "He left Pen. Told us he didn't want to be part of International Rescue, or this family any more."

"Oh Jeff!"

"It gets worse. He's being controlled."

"Controlled? By whom?"

Jeff shook his head. "By Hood. If you believe Tin-Tin anyway."

"I don't understand." Penny shook her head. "Wait…that must be why Scott called me…"

Jeff frowned. "When did Scott call you?"

"A few weeks ago. Something happened, he wouldn't go into detail, but wanted me to personally check on Hood's whereabouts." She frowned. "Now that I think of it, Scott did mention that he thought John was being controlled somehow."

"I hadn't realized Scott talked to you."

Penny caught the hint of annoyance in Jeff's tone and ignored it. "Yes, nearly all of the boys have contacted me over the past few months. I am still part of this organization am I not?" Then her tone softened and she placed a gentle hand on Jeff's arm. "This is what I meant Jeff. I have to be your agent first. How can that happen if I'm your wife?"

Jeff sighed wearily. "I know. But there has to be some way to get around it!" He looked up into her golden eyes. "I love you." He said simply.

She trembled. "I love you."

"But that doesn't change anything." Jeff got to his feet and paced the room. "What else did Scott tell you?"

Penny shook her head. "Nothing. Only that you were trying to get Five back online and that John had left."

"That about sums it up."

"Do you think he's gone for good? I mean, this is John we're talking about."

Jeff shook his head. "I really think he is Pen. He's got a girlfriend, one he seems pretty serious about. She's a nurse apparently."

Penny's hazel eyes opened wide. "Did he tell her about…"

"I don't think so. At least, he's never mentioned it, and I think if John had told her, he'd have said something to me. I hope he would anyway. He seems…happy. How can I begrudge him that just because I want him home?" He said softly.

"Jeff? I…I heard you two talking earlier." Jeff turned to see Penny blushing furiously. "I didn't mean to. I was waiting to talk to you when John called." She looked up. "It's obvious that John does still care. _He_ called _you_ for reassurance, didn't he?"

Jeff thought for a moment. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Penny smiled. "I'm always right."

Jeff smiled back, then it faded. "There's more."

"About John?"

He shook his head. "No, Scott."

"Scott?"

Jeff walked outside to the balcony and stood staring out as the sunset. "Scott's…in trouble."

Penny walked over to stand next to him. "In trouble how?"

"His shoulder has never healed. He needs a total shoulder replacement."

"Oh no!"

"There's more." Jeff sighed. "Seems he has a drug problem as well." He said quietly.

"Drugs?" Penny was stunned.

"Prescription drugs. Seems he's been hooked for a while now." Jeff filled her in on all that had happened then he leaned forward on the railing. "Dammit Penny, Gordon could have been killed!"

"And Scott won't admit he has a problem?" Penny asked.

"Not even when he had his brother's medicine in his hands." Jeff rested his head on the railing. "I don't know what to do anymore…"

Penny placed a tentative hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry Jeff." She said softly.

Jeff straightened and surprising her, took her tightly into his arms. "I've missed you, so much." He whispered hoarsely into her hair.

"I've missed you too." She looked up at him, her golden brown eyes full of tears.

He pulled her close again. "Things haven't been right without you."

"I know." She nestled close into him. "Things haven't been right with me either. Until now."

"I'm glad you're here." He whispered huskily.

"Oh Jeff!" The tears she had been trying desperately to hold back, finally broke free and she sobbed into Jeff's chest. He held her close, just breathing in the scent of her. Finally she pulled back, wiping at her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"There's nothing for you to be sorry for." He told her, gently running his hand under her chin, tilting her head up so she had to look at her. "I shouldn't have left the way I did. I was angry, I wanted to hurt you."

"You succeeded."

"I'm sorry." He pulled her close again.

"We need to stop saying that." She looked up at him. "I do love you Jeff, that never changed. I was surprised by your proposal, then hurt and confused when you left." She pulled back and walked a few steps away. "I want to be you wife Jeff. I want to lie down with you every night, and wake up next to you every morning, but I can't! I can't be your wife and your agent at the same time." She held up a hand to stem off his protests. "And you know I'm far too valuable as an agent to just quit. Please Jeff, try and understand."

Jeff ran a hand over his head and sighed. "I do understand Penny. I've had a bit of time to think about it. While I won't deny that you hurt me when you said no, after I calmed down and thought about it, I realized you were right. But then John left, and Scott started, and Gordon got hurt, and we had Five to repair…" His voice trailed off. "It's all so overwhelming."

Penny took his hand. "You haven't lost John, and you haven't lost me. And you're not going to loss Scott." She stood on her toes and placed a soft kiss on his lips. "I love you Jeff. And I'm not leaving until we get this mess straightened out."

Jeff smiled. "You haven't been on the receiving end of either Scott _or_ John."

She arched a perfect eyebrow at him. "You think I'm afraid of them?"

"I am."

Penny laughed at Jeff's wry expression. "Oh Jeff, I have missed you. I've missed all of you."

Jeff led her to the couch and pulled her down to him. "We've missed you too." He held her close as together they watched the sun set across the sea.

* * *

Alan paced nervously on the bridge of Thunderbird 5. He glanced down at his watch for what seemed like the hundredth time. _It's almost midnight. Why hasn't she called?_

He sighed and flopped down in the chair, his gaze drawn to the Earth outside. So mesmerized by the scene in front of him, that he nearly missed the flashing light on the computer. Pressing the button, he took a deep breath. "Thunderbird 5."

"_Alan?"_

Alan broke into a huge grin. "Hey Tin-Tin. You're late, everything OK down there?"

"_Depends on your version of OK. Lady Penelope is here."_

Alan's blue eyes widened in surprise. "Really? How'd Dad take it?"

Tin-Tin smiled. _"Pretty well I'd say since they were alone in his office for almost three hours. Which is why I was late. Had to let them leave then make sure everyone was in bed."_

Alan laughed. "Go Dad! Seriously, are they…"

"_They're just talking Alan. Lady P. went to her own room."_

"Well, that's good I guess." Alan wasn't sure if he was disappointed or relieved.

"_How are you doing up there?"_

"Great!" He looked up out the windows again and sighed. "This place is so cool Tin-Tin. There's so much to do and see! And the stars…They're amazing. I don't know how John can stand being back on Earth." A small whimper from Tin-Tin captured his attention again, and the smile faded from his face. "What's wrong?"

"_He…my uncle…"_

Alan went cold. "Tell me Tin-Tin."

"_He's been very, very quiet. I don't think he's hurting John, not exactly. But John's been thinking loudly again."_

Alan frowned. "About what?"

Tin-Tin shook her head. _"I can't tell. But he's really worked up about something."_ She sighed. _"And there's more…"_

"With John?"

"_No, Scott."_

"What happened to Scott!" Alan yelped, then looked back towards the sleeping quarters. When Brains didn't appear, he turned back to the computer. "Tin-Tin?"

"_He was caught by your Dad and Virgil, coming out of Gordon's room. With Gordon's meds."_

"No…"

"_Mr. Tracy took him to the infirmary and Steve told them that Scott needs a shoulder replacement or he's going to lose the use of his arm."_

"Damn…" Alan whispered. "Is Steve doing it?"

"_I don't think so. He wants Scott to see a friend of his who's a surgeon in Boston. Scott disappeared somewhere. Your Dad can't find him."_

Alan's forehead furrowed in concentration. "He's hiding on the library roof."

Tin-Tin's coffee eyes widened in surprise. _"How do you know that?"_

Alan shrugged. "All my brother's have their own hiding places. John goes to the top of the cliff, Virgil locks himself in the studio, and Gordon goes to the beach at the far end of the island. Dad just goes into his office and sulks."

"_And you have your cave." _Tin-Tin smiled mischievously.

Alan glared at her. "Brat." She laughed and after a moment he joined in. "I miss you." He said softly a few minutes later.

"_You've only been gone less than a day!"_ She teased.

"Are you saying you don't miss me?" Alan shot back.

Tin-Tin blushed and looked away from the screen. _"I didn't say that…"_ She said softly.

"Then what did you say?" Alan asked.

She looked up. _"I miss you too Alan."_ She placed her hand on the screen.

Alan pressed his hand to hers. "See you in a couple days Tin-Tin."

"_Good night Alan."_ She smiled one last time, then her image faded.

Alan sighed and took one last look at the stars before heading to his bed.


	23. Chapter 23

OK, being brain-dead as I have been lately, I totally forgot to thank Lucy for her help in the last chapter. Lucy! Thanks!

Again, don't own 'em so please don't sue. Enjoy!

* * *

John shifted the package of flowers in his arms as he stared up at the apartment building in front of him. Taking a deep breath, he walked up the stairs and pressed the buzzer.

Nothing happened.

He pressed it again.

Still nothing.

"C'mon Christa, answer the door." John pressed the buzzer once more, then leaned his forehead against the wall and sighed.

"Excuse me."

John's head snapped up and he turned. A small elderly lady carrying two bags of groceries, smiled up at him. "If you're looking for Christa, she won't be home for a few more hours yet. She told me she was working late today."

John sighed. "Thank-you. Can I leave these for her?" He indicated the flowers.

The woman smiled. "You must be John."

John frowned in puzzlement. "Yes ma'am."

"Christa often speaks of you. I'm Elsie Shapiro. Why don't you come in and wait for her."

"I wouldn't want to be a bother." John told her, shaking his head.

"You'd be no bother. Come." She shuffled past him and struggled to hold her bags and find her key.

"Here, let me take those." John quickly took the bags from her and she smiled gratefully and opened the door. He followed her inside and up the stairs. He'd been to Christa's apartment a few times, and knew she shared the building with two other people.

Mrs. Shapiro led John to her door and he waited as she opened. "Well dear, are you coming in?"

John smiled and stepped inside. The apartment was furnished much the way he had imagined it would be, with large overstuffed couches and lace doilies. He bit back a chuckle as he followed Mrs. Shapiro into the kitchen.

"Thank-you dear, you can put them on the table." She bustled around the kitchen, putting her groceries away. "Would you like something to eat John?"

"No thank-you ma'am. I wouldn't want to be any trouble." He smiled. "I'll just leave these at Christa's door and be on my way."

"You will do no such thing. Sit yourself down and wait for her."

"Really Mrs. Shapiro, I can just come back later."

"Nonsense, you're too thin. Sit." She said firmly, waiting until John had seated himself at the table. "Good. Christa has been moping around for nearly a week now. You stay here and have a talk with her." Mrs. Shapiro opened the cupboard and began tossing ingredients into a bowl. "I'll make up some nice molasses cookies while we wait for her."

"Ma'am, you don't have to do that, I'm fine." John tried protesting once more, but she shot him a steely glare and turned back to her cooking. A few moments later, she had the cookies on a pan and went over to the oven.

"Oh dear."

John looked up. "What's wrong?"

"My oven again. It's been acting up for over a month now, and I've told the super, but…" Her voice trailed off and she sighed wistfully.

John got to his feet. "Let me take a look." He started peeling off his jacket.

"No no, I couldn't let you. Your shirt will—"

But John had pushed her gently aside and was peering into the stove. "Do you have any tools?"

"Yes, but…" She shook her head and went into the other room, returning a few minutes later with a pink toolbox. John arched an eyebrow and she smiled. "My son gave it to me. Every woman needs their own tools." She told him.

"Of course they do." He pulled the racks out of the oven and bent inside.

* * *

Christa made her way wearily up the stairs towards her apartment. _What a day…_ Hearing voices, she paused in front of Mrs. Shapiro's door and knocked.

The door opened a few moments later and Mrs. Shapiro's face beamed up at her. "Ah, there you are dear. Come in, come in."

Christa followed her into the kitchen. "Is everything all right? I heard you talking to some—John!"

"Hey Christa." John smiled softly up at her. He was seated at the table, a plate of cookies and a half empty glass of milk in front of him. His normally perfect hair was unkempt and his shirt was streaked with dirt.

"What happened to you?" Christa demanded, taking in his appearance.

"There was a slight problem with the stove." John winked at Mrs. Shapiro, making the elderly lady giggle.

"John was a love and fixed my stove." She frowned fondly at him. "At the cost of his shirt though."

John waved a hand. "I told you not to worry about it. It'll wash out."

"It will not. That's oven grease and God knows what else."

John rolled his eyes. "She's been going on for an hour now." John grinned as Mrs. Shapiro cuffed him lightly on the head.

"Go on you two. I'm sure you don't want to be stuck here with an old lady for company." She pushed them both towards the door. "Wait! John you forgot your package." She handed him the box of flowers.

John smiled and handed her the box, placing a kiss on her wrinkled cheek. "You keep them. In thanks for the cookies." She stammered out something and John shut the door.

He took a deep breath and turned to Christa. "Hi."

She glared and letting out a "Humph," turned on her heel and marched up the last flight of stairs. John followed. She unlocked her door, leaving it open so he went in, shutting the door behind him.

John watched as Christa stomped around the apartment, putting her things away, not even glancing in his direction. After nearly ten minutes of this, John's own temper began to rise. "Look Christa, I came over here to apologize, but if you're not even going to look at me, I don't know why I'm wasting my time." He snapped.

She whirled, her indigo eyes flashing angrily. "What do you want me to say John? You're the one who's avoided me for a week!"

"And if you'd give me a minute, I'd apologize for it!" John shot back.

They both glared at each other. Then Christa folded her hands across her chest. "Fine. Apologize then."

John raked a hand over his hair and paced the room. "Dammit I'm trying!" He sighed. "I'm sorry. I acted like an ass on the beach. You were only trying to help and I bit your head off. I'm sorry."

She shrugged. "OK, you're sorry."

John's head snapped up and his blue eyes darkened in anger. "What more do you want from me Christa?"

"I want an explanation!" She marched angrily across the room, poking him in the chest. "You claim to be an astrophysicist, yet you know how to pull off a water rescue like that? And what kind of work do you do exactly that your lab is attacked by terrorists? Not to mention there is absolutely no way, _no god-damned way,_ the World Police would have let you join a raid, money or no money. Who are you John Tracy! Who are you really?"

John's temper flared. "You want to know who I am? Fine! I'm a member of International Rescue. My lab wasn't attacked, my space station was. I was beaten, tortured and nearly died. The madman that did all this has some sort of ESP and has been screwing with my mind ever since! He's locked up, but there hasn't been a jail yet that can hold him and once he's out, he's going to come after me!" His eyes flashed dangerously. "There, is that what you wanted to hear?"

Christa glared right back at him. "Please, could you at least come up with a better story than that?"

John closed his eyes and clenched his fists at his side. "Forget it. Just forget it. I don't know why I even bothered." He turned and leaned his hands on the windowsill, breathing heavily, his body shuddering.

Christa watched him, her anger slowly melting away. She walked over and placed a hand on his shoulder. "John?"

"Just leave me alone."

"No."

"I went to the clinic." He said softly a few minutes later.

"What?"

He turned to look up at her, his blue eyes filled with an emotion she couldn't read. "I went to the clinic and had them take a look at me. Just to make sure." He turned back to stare outside. "The doc said I was fine, but he said taking a swim in an undertow probably wasn't the smartest thing I could have done."

"Kind of like jogging with a pneumothorax?" She grinned at him, getting a small smile in return.

"Yeah, kind of like that." He straightened and pulled her against him. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

She wrapped his arms around his waist and held him tightly. "I'm sorry too. You did know what you were doing." She looked up at him, her eyes twinkling devilishly. "Come to think of it, you did almost look like one of those International Rescue guys!" She teased. John stiffened and she went on. "You know, all take charge and go save the day kind of thing." She pulled his head down. "Very sexy." She said huskily, kissing him.

John relaxed into her embrace. "Missed you babe." He said a few minutes later.

"I missed you too." She smiled. "So those flowers you gave to Mrs. Shapiro, were those supposed to be for me?"

He grinned. "Yep. Had to suck up somehow."

"Then you'd better go get me more."

John laughed and reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out a slim box. "Will this work instead?"

She wore a puzzled expression as she took the box and opened it. Then her eyes widened in surprise. "Oh John…" John took the chain and carefully fastened it around her neck. She held the deep blue sapphire in her hands, and looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "John…This is beautiful. Thank-you."

He turned to look at her. "No Christa, thank-you." He bent down and kissed her.

She held him tight. "I love you John."

He let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "I love you too." He said huskily, his voice tight with emotion.

Christa smiled up at him. "Tell you what, why don't you stay here tonight? I'll cook dinner and we can catch up."

The tension eased from John's shoulders. "That sounds great." He watched as she sauntered into the kitchen.

_See, she does love me. Take that you bastard._

* * *

Scott crept softly through the silent house. It was very late, or very early depending on your point of view, and he was in a foul mood. He idly rubbed his shoulder as he cursed to himself. _Damn Virgil. So I take a few meds…it hurts dammit! And now I have to report to the infirmary every time I need a fucking aspirin._ He found his way to the kitchen, opening the cupboards looking for the bottle of ibuprofen Onaha kept there.

"They're not there."

Scott jumped and whirled around. Gordon flicked on the small light over the table. "Evening Scotty."

"Jeez Gordon! You scared the crap out of me." Scott frowned at his brother. "Why are you up? You OK?"

Gordon got himself some water from the fridge and stiffly eased himself down in a chair. "I could ask you the same question. You've been avoiding me Scott."

Scott tensed. "I have not."

Gordon shrugged and took a swallow from his water bottle. "Oh yeah, then why haven't you been to see me since the accident?"

"I've just been busy."

"Yeah, I heard. Stealing now Scott? I thought you were above that sort of thing." Gordon eyed his eldest brother balefully.

Scott's face turned an angry red. "Shut up Gordon. You don't know what you're talking about." He started to march from the room when Gordon's voice stopped him cold.

"It consumes you. The need. No matter how much you take the pain never really goes away does it?"

Scott turned. "Gordon?"

Gordon shrugged and took another drink. "For me, it was morphine. It was hard to get and harder still to get off of."

Scott sat down across from his brother. "When?"

"After my hydrofoil accident. I spent an extra two weeks in the hospital coming off the drugs."

Scott was stunned. "Gordon, I never knew."

"No one did. Only Virgil." He idly made circles on the table with his water bottle. "It's not something I'm ashamed of, but it's not something I'm proud of either."

Scott was thoughtful a moment. "That's why you refuse the hard stuff when you're hurting…"

Gordon nodded. "I never want to become that dependent on anything again. It terrifies me that it could happen." He said quietly.

"Damn Gords…"

Gordon finally looked up, his coffee brown eyes locking on his brother's grey ones. "It doesn't make you less of a person to ask for help Scott."

Scott shifted uncomfortably, unable to tear his gaze away from Gordon's. "I...I can't…"

Gordon reached out and took Scott's hand. "Yes Scott, you can. Let us…let **me** help you."

Scott got up and nervously paced the room. He finally came to a stop staring out across the patio to the pool. "You'd help me? After what I did to you?" He asked hoarsely.

Gordon walked over to his brother's side. "If I can forgive you, don't you think it's time you forgave yourself?"

Scott took a shuddering breath and clenched his eyes shut. "Gordon…" He turned and faced his younger brother, his eyes haunted. "Please…help me…"


	24. Chapter 24

Surprise! I got a day off, so here's a new chap. Enjoy! Again, I don't own the TB's just the characters I made up.

* * *

John whistled as he stirred the sauce on the stove. He had jazz playing in the background, and the bluesy notes suited the rainy weather outside. He glanced up at the clock and smiled. _Christa got off work twenty minutes ago, she should be here soon._ He lowered the flame under the sauce and took a peek at the chicken in the oven.

"_Maybe she won't show up after all."_

"Shut up."

"_Now John—"_

"I said shut up." John tried to drown out the voice in his head by turning the music up louder. He walked over to the bar and poured himself a shot of whiskey, then sat on the couch, idly leafing through a sheaf of papers.

"**DING-DONG!"**

John's head snapped up and he turned down the music, listening intently.

"**DING-DONG!"**

John smiled and walked over to the door. "What happened babe, forget your key?" He asked as he opened the door.

"Hey there brother mine."

John stood stunned. "Scott?"

Scott grinned tiredly up at his brother. "In the flesh so to speak."

"I…how…What are you doing here?"

Scott chuckled. "Sounding like Brains there John. If you let me come in, I'll explain everything."

John shook off his shock and stepped aside. "What? Oh sure, come in."

"Thanks bro." Scott shook the water out of his hair. "Dad's right behind me. He's getting the luggage out of the car."

"Dad's here too!"

"It's kind of a long story."

John felt his temper building and he folded his arms across his chest. "I'm dying to hear it."

Jeff opened the door at that moment and took in the sight before him. Scott stood, grinning sheepishly, while John glared, his blue eyes bright with anger. "Hello John."

John turned and nodded. "Dad. Scott here, was about to tell my why you two have suddenly appeared on my doorstep." He said shortly.

Jeff narrowed his eyes at his second son. "Last I checked, it was _my_ doorstep."

John took a deep breath. "Fine." He stormed off towards the kitchen.

Jeff raised an eyebrow at Scott who shrugged. Well, isn't this going to be a fun stay." Scott muttered, walking up the stairs.

Jeff sighed and went into the kitchen. John was stirring something on the stove, muttering under his breath. "John, I'm sorry for the intrusion, it just never occurred to me to call a hotel."

John jumped, his eyes darting wildly around the room. Jeff frowned. "Are you alright?"

John turned back to the stove. "I'm fine." He said shortly. "You startled me that's all. Not used to having anyone around."

Jeff leaned against the counter. "I'll make a few calls and find a hotel."

"Great." He replied, not looking up.

Jeff sighed. _What happened to the John of a week ago that called me for help?_ "John look—"

Before he could continue, they heard the front door open. "Hey honey! Something smells great!" Christa sauntered into the room, shaking the rain out of her black hair. "What are you making? Oh, hello." She paused looking at Jeff.

Jeff smiled. "Hello."

"Wait, you're John's father. We spoke on the phone once…" She smiled and held out her hand. "I'm Christa Lynch."

Jeff took her hand and grasped it warmly. "Jeff Tracy."

"So Mr. Tracy, what brings you to Boston?" Christa asked.

John turned and folded his arms across his chest. "Yes, I'd be interested in hearing that myself."

Christa shot him a quizzical look. "John? Is something wrong?"

John let his breath out in a huff and turned back to the stove. "It's nothing." He snapped.

Christa raised an eyebrow at Jeff who shrugged. She started towards John when Scott came back in the room. "Hey Blondie! I found nylons hanging in the bathroom. There something you want to tell me?"

"Actually, they belong to me." Christa glared at him.

Scott started then broke into an easy grin. "Hey there. You must be Christa."

She smiled back. "Yes I am." She eyed him critically. "And you must be…hmm, it's either Scott or Virgil. I'm guessing Scott."

"You guessed correctly." His grey eyes twinkled at her. "So, you're the girl who got my little brother's head out of the stars."

Christa laughed. "Well, we did go to the planetarium on our second date."

Scott walked over and draped his arm across John's shoulders. "Bro, we _so_ need to talk."

John merely shrugged himself free. "Trying to cook here." He tossed some pasta into a pot of boiling water.

Scott glanced at his father who shook his head. "John, don't go to any trouble. We'll get something at the hotel." Jeff told him.

"Hotel? Why are you going to a hotel? There's plenty of room here, right John?" Christa smiled at John.

John took a deep breath. "Sure. Plenty of room." He said through clenched teeth.

Christa frowned at him. "We'll just go wash up, it was a long flight." Jeff started from the room, grabbing Scott by the good elbow and pulling him along. "Let's go Scott."

Christa waited until they were out of earshot before turning to John. "Want to explain to me what that was all about?"

"What?"

"Don't you 'What?' me. That little scene with your family? You were downright rude." Christa told him.

John finally looked at her. "Yeah? Good." He sighed. "Look Christa, I've told you. Things are…strained between us. I'm just surprised to see them here OK?"

"You could be a little nicer. You don't even know why they're here."

"I don't particularly care."

"John."

John sighed. "Fine. They can stay." He muttered.

Christa stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank-you. Now, what's for dinner?"

"Chicken parmigiana. I hope there's enough." John said, pouring a glass of wine for himself and Christa.

"They'll be plenty." Christa placed two more settings at the table.

"Plenty what?" Asked Scott as he came back in.

"Dinner. John doesn't think we'll have enough. But he eats like a bird anyway." Christa winked at John who rolled his eyes. Scott burst out laughing.

Jeff walked in at that point. "Eats like a bird? Are you talking about John?"

John groaned. "Yeah, let them stay here, great idea." He muttered under his breath. "OK, I'm not a waitress. Serve yourselves."

Jeff grabbed two plates. "Scott sit and rest, I'll get yours."

John took a good look at his brother and for the first time, noticed how stiffly Scott was moving. "What's wrong?"

"My shoulder." Scott sat down as Jeff put a plate in front of him.

Christa frowned. "John told me you fell and cracked your collarbone or something. What happened?" She sat down across from him.

Scott met John's eyes behind Christa. John shook his head and Scott sighed. "I was doing some work on the roof at home and slipped off some scaffolding. I need to see a specialist about it."

John sat down and stared at his brother. "It hasn't healed?"

Scott shook his head. "Not really." He looked down at his plate.

"Who are you seeing?" Christa asked.

Jeff joined them. "Some one named Rosemary Vickers."

"Rosie? She's the best. You'll love her." Christa told Scott.

"Of course he'll love her. She's got legs doesn't she?" John muttered, breaking the tension around the table.

The meal continued with everyone, except John, talking and laughing. John merely picked at his meal, finally getting up and leaving his nearly full plate on the counter, and marched from the room. A few moments later they heard the front door slam.

Jeff looked over at Christa, who sighed. "He'll be back in a little while." She said softly as she got up and started clearing the table.

Jeff shot a look at Scott and nodded towards the door. Scott sighed. "Thanks for dinner. If you both don't mind, I'm going to lie down for a while. I'll take one of the spare rooms."

Christa frowned at him in concern. "Are you in pain? I have some stuff in my bag if you need it."

A fleeting emotion flashed across Scott's face. "No thanks, I'll be fine." Without another word, he slipped out of the room.

When he had left, Christa looked up at Jeff. "What else is wrong with him? What didn't he tell us?" Jeff looked up started. "Please, I'm not blind."

Jeff started loading the dishwasher. "He's addicted to painkillers. Vicodin especially." He sighed. "We're hoping we can kill two birds with one stone while we're here."

"Mr. Tracy? Scott has to **want** to stop the drugs. Otherwise…"

"I know. And the name is Jeff."

She smiled. "I'll try." She glanced out at the rain outside and sighed. "Mr. Tracy…Jeff? Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. What's on your mind Christa?"

She busied herself at the stove a moment, then sat down at the table, looking down at her folded hands. "It's John…"

Jeff sat down across from her. "What about him?"

"He told me that there's some…tension between all of you."

"You could say that." Jeff sighed. "Did he tell you why?"

She shook her head. "No. He said that things were strained, but that's it." She sighed. "He's talked a little about his accident. How his lab was attacked by terrorists and that they kidnapped some of his colleagues. But then he gives me some story about using his name and money to go on the World Police raid to get them back!" She got up and paced the room. "He's lying to me! I know he is! He's plagued by these horrible nightmares and panic attacks and then there's the drinking…" She sighed. "I love him, really I do, but…" She looked up at him, her indigo eyes brimming with tears. "I just don't know what to do anymore."

Jeff got up and took her in his arms. "Oh honey." She trembled, crying silently and he gently rubbed his hands over her hair. She was so tiny, that she barely came up to his shoulders.

Christa pulled away, wiping at her eyes. "I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for."

"I just met you and I'm dumping all this in your lap." She took a steadying breath. "It just gets a little overwhelming sometimes. Every time I think I have John figured out, he throws me a curveball."

Jeff smiled. "I know exactly how you feel." Then his smile faded. "He's still drinking?"

She held up an empty wine bottle. "You and I each had a glass, Scott didn't have any."

Jeff closed his eyes. "Damn…" He looked up at her again and weighed his words carefully. "I don't know exactly what went on that day. I was only there for the aftermath. He was attacked, and did go after his attackers. What happened then, he won't talk about. I've tried to be patient, but getting John to open up is like trying to talk to a brick wall sometimes. The only one who's ever really gotten through to him is Scott."

"Maybe he can help."

Jeff shook his head. "Scott has his own demons to deal with. I've left John alone, hoping he'd turn to me when he was ready, and he has to an extent but…"

"But he's still holding something back." She finished.

"Exactly." Jeff looked solemnly into her eyes. "Don't let him drive you away Christa."

"Is that what he did to you?"

Jeff nodded. "In a way. He convinced himself that we don't care and he isn't needed and left."

Christa's eyes widened in surprise. "He never told me he left you! I thought…"

"That I sent him away." He shook his head. "He was hurt, physically and emotionally. I'd never to that to a stranger, let alone my son."

"Mr. Tracy—Jeff, I'm so sorry."

Jeff shrugged. "I'm hoping that being here with Scott can make him see that we do still care."

Christa smiled and took his hand. "We'll work on him together."

* * *

John staggered up the front steps and unlocked the door. Stepping inside he waited until the foyer stopped spinning and glanced up at the clock. _2:30…Terrific._ He pulled off his sodden jacket and after fighting with the coat hanger for a moment, just dropped it on the floor.

He stumbled to the stairs and after staring at them a minute, decided to sleep on the downstairs couch instead._ Not that I couldn't get up there if I really wanted to._ He made his way into the living room and flopped down on the couch.

"Late night there John-boy?"

John yelped in surprise as the lamp next to the couch turned on. "Scott? Why are you still up?"

"Wrong time zone. What about you?" Scott asked, settling himself gingerly back in his chair.

"I don't have to explain my actions to you." John snapped.

Scott met his brother's gaze levelly. "No, but you do have someone you _should_ have talked to."

John groaned and put his face in his hands. "Shit."

"You're lucky bro. She's not here."

John's head snapped up. "Where is she?"

Scott shifted again, idly rubbing his shoulder. "She got called into work. Some kind of accident on 95."

"Shit." John said again. He got to his feet, and paused as the room spun around him.

"Dammit John!" Scott bolted to his feet and placed a steadying hand on his brother's arm. "How much have you had?"

"None of your business." He pulled his arm free and started towards the door, reeling unsteadily.

"Where do you think you're going?" Scott asked, once again steadying his brother.

"To bed, where do you think?"

Scott snorted. "Like you can make it up the stairs at this point. Hell, Fermat could knock you over one handed." He steered John back to the couch, wrinkling his nose at the alcohol stench emanating from his brother. "Plant it Blondie."

Knowing it was useless to argue, John sagged back on the couch. "Was she pissed?" He asked a few minutes later.

Scott sat down across from his brother. "Actually, she acted like this was an everyday occurrence. Is that true John?"

John glared. "No."

"John."

"Look Scott, it's none of your damned business if I have a few drinks!"

"You've had more than a few there bud."

"And how many pills have you popped today?" John had the satisfaction of seeing Scott go pale. "Just because I don't live at home anymore, doesn't mean I'm out of the loop. Alan's been the only one who's bothered to keep in touch with me the past few months."

Scott willed himself to stay calm. "Maybe you should have tried harder to keep in touch with us."

"Fuck you Scott." John got to his feet again, this time lurching over to the bar.

Scott frowned. "Don't you think you've had enough?"

John ignored him and took a long pull of whiskey straight from the bottle. Scott shook his head in disgust and left the room without another word.

John watched him leave out of the corner of his eye, then sat back down on the couch.

"_The nerve of him."_

"Don't start. I'm not in the mood."

"_No, you are a bit irate this evening, aren't you John."_

"I said knock it off." He took another drink.

"_But John, is it me you're angry at? **They** are the ones who showed up on your doorstep without so much as a by your leave."_

John nodded. "Yeah…"

"_And now Mr. 'Holier than thou' Scott Tracy lectures you? So you had a bit to drink. You **are** a grown man. Responsible for your own actions."_

"At least I'm not popping painkillers like they're candy." He muttered, placing the bottle on the coffee table.

"_He nearly got your brothers killed."_

John started. "What? When? How?"

"_Scott caused the accident with Gordon and Alan. Did not your father tell you?"_

John started to do a slow burn. "No, he only said Gords had been hurt on a rescue."

"_Well, I suppose this is just one more thing they did not want you to know about. Sleep well John."_

John gave a groan and settled back onto the couch, closing his eyes and giving in to oblivion.

Scott paused in the hallway, listening to his brother's one sided conversation. He thought at first John was talking to Christa, but as he went on, Scott felt a chill run through him. _The Hood, it has to be._ He glanced back into the room, and seeing that John had fallen asleep, _or passed out,_ he sighed and made his way to his own bed.


	25. Chapter 25

I don't own the Thunderbirds, alas, but I do own the characters I made up. Thanks and happy reading!

And a big thank-you for my own "Dr. Vickers!" ;)

**_

* * *

Morning,_**

**_Had to run out to a meeting, but coffee's in the pot, help yourselves. I'm going to swing by the grocery store, so if you want anything special, let me know. Otherwise you're stuck with my cooking._**

**_Good luck at the doctor's Scott. Talk to you later._**

**_John_**

Scott sighed and passed the note to his father. "I don't get it Dad. Last night he hated the sight of us and now he's wanting to know what we want for dinner!"

Jeff frowned. "Maybe John just needed time to get used to the idea of us being here."

Scott snorted as he poured himself a cup of coffee. "Yeah right. He and his new friend Glen." At Jeff's raised eyebrow, Scott went on. "Glenfiddich. John came in pretty toasted last night. Couldn't even make it up the stairs. Frankly, I can't believe he's out and about already this morning. Figured he'd have a helluva hangover."

"You should have come and got me."

"I handled him." Scott looked down at his cup. "He was talking and I don't think it was to himself." He added quietly.

"You really think Hood is behind this?" Jeff asked skeptically.

Scott nodded. "I know it's hard to believe Dad. But trust me. Hood is screwing with John's mind. You saw…"

Jeff's mind wandered back to Christa's frantic call a few weeks ago and he sighed. "You may be right." He shook his head. "But there's nothing I can do for John at the moment. And you're stalling. Let's go."

Sighing, Scott followed his father out the door where a car was waiting. "Mass General." Jeff told the driver and they merged into traffic. Jeff glanced over at his eldest. "Scott, don't be nervous. You're going to be fine."

"Yeah, easy for you to say. You're not the one about to be turned into the Bionic Man." Scott replied sullenly.

Jeff bit back a chuckle. "Scott, it won't be that bad."

"When Alan and Gordon get a hold of this, I'll never have peace again."

This time Jeff couldn't contain his laugh. "I'll have a talk with them."

Scott groaned. "That'll only make them sneakier." He sighed. "I'm scared Dad. What if they screw up? What if they can't fix it and I can't…" His voice trailed off.

"Scott." Jeff waited until his son looked up at him. "Whatever happens, we'll deal with it OK? You're not in this alone."

Scott smiled tentatively. "Thanks Dad." His gaze shifted as they pulled up in front of the hospital. They both got out, and stared at the building in front of them. Scott took a deep breath. "Here goes nothing." He opened the door and they stepped inside.

They paused to ask directions at the information kiosk, then went upstairs to Dr. Vickers' office. The secretary looked up as they entered.

"Scott Tracy, here to see Dr. Vickers."

She smiled. "Have a seat Mr. Tracy, it will just be a few minutes."

Scott thanked her, and sat down, picking up a magazine and leafing idly through it. Jeff watched him, but his thoughts wandered back to John. _Could it be true? Hood showed no sign of being that powerful back in London. But Scott, Tin-Tin and even Kyrano all agree._ He sighed. _But what do I do about it? How do I fight a madman that reads minds?_

"Mr. Tracy?" Both Scott and Jeff's heads snapped up. "Dr. Vickers will see you now."

Jeff got to his feet and started after the nurse. Scott took a deep breath and followed them. Rosemary Vickers was a tall woman, with shoulder length brown hair and deep coffee eyes. She smiled warmly as they walked into the room. "Hello."

Jeff took her outstretched hand. "Dr. Vickers, I'm Jeff Tracy, and this is my son, Scott."

Scott nodded and seated himself gingerly in a chair. "Hey…"

Dr. Vickers sat down at her desk and opened a file. "So, Steve MacLeod sent you to me."

Jeff nodded. "It was under Steve's recommendation that Scott needs a shoulder replacement. He told us you were the one to do it."

"Hmmmm…." Her brown eyes scanned the papers in front of her, then she pulled up a screen on her computer. "Well Scott, that's some damage you've got there. Looks like it was fixed at one point, want to tell me how the more recent damage was incurred?"

Scott shifted uncomfortably. "No ma'am, I'm afraid I can't tell you that."

She frowned for a moment, then leaned back in her chair, folding her hands in her lap. "So Scott, if you can't tell me, why are you here then?"

Scott sighed. "I was hurt during an…incident at work. The rest of the damage is all my fault. I was supposed to be taking it easy and doing therapy, but I'll admit, I'm not the world's best patient."

"You can say that again." Jeff muttered under his breath.

Rosie hid a smile. "And why then should I fix you? You've admitted that you don't take care of yourself. Shoulder replacement is a long, hard road. If you aren't going to do what you need to, I'm not going to waste my time."

Scott gulped. "Yes ma'am."

Jeff leaned forward. "Perhaps you could tell us what the surgery and recovery will entail."

Rosie nodded and pulled another screen up on her computer. "This is your shoulder Scott. As you can see, there has been extensive damage to the humerus, clavicle, and scapula; your upper arm and shoulder blade. We'll be replacing the damaged ends here…and here…" She pointed to the screen. "And inserting a rod here, in your upper arm. The joint will also be rebuilt using a titanium based artificial joint."

Scott gulped. "Titanium? That's the only way?"

She nodded. "If you ever want to have the use of your arm again." Scott paled and sat back in his chair. "Rehab starts the day after surgery. We'll begin slowly working the arm, each day increasing the weight and range of motion until we determine the full extent of recovery." She looked up at both of them. "I'll want you close by so I can check your progress, daily at first, then two or three days a week. Do you have a place to stay? And some one who could help you?"

Scott glanced at his father. "Yes, we have a house here in the city. And I'll stay as long as Scott needs me." Jeff answered.

"Good." She turned back to Scott. "I won't lie to you Scott. You have extensive damage here. I'm not a miracle worker, I'll do my best, but it's going to involve a lot of work on your part. Even then you still may not get total mobility back. Still want to go through with this?"

Scott got up and paced the room. Finally he stopped and turned to face Dr. Vickers. "Yes ma'am, I want to do this."

She glanced down at the file again. "Steve also mentioned that you have some sort of drug problem?"

Jeff spoke up. "It's not drugs Doctor, it's painkillers."

Rosie turned her eyes to Jeff. "Drugs are drugs Mr. Tracy. Doesn't matter what kind of pretty name you try and dress them up with."

Jeff frowned at her tone, but said nothing else. She turned back to Scott. "Well?"

Scott stopped to stare out the window overlooking Storrow Drive. "I want the surgery and I want off the drugs." He clenched his fists and took a deep breath. "I want my life back."

Jeff heard the despair in his son's voice and his heart went out to him. He got up and walked over to Scott's side, placing a comforting hand on his good shoulder. Rosie smiled. "Then I guess Steve was right when he sent you to me. I expect you to be in the hospital for about two weeks. Usually it's a two to four day stay for the surgery, but adding the drug rehab will take a few days more. You won't be alone through this Scott. I'll be next to you every step of the way."

"As will I." Jeff added.

Scott gave his father a look full of gratitude. "Thanks Dad." He said quietly. Then he squared his shoulders and turned back towards the doctor. "When can we do this?"

She glanced down at her computer again. "Hmm…How does Thursday sound?"

Scott gulped. "This Thursday? Like in two days from now?"

Rosie nodded. "No time like the present."

He took a shuddering breath. "Then Thursday it is. Thank-you Dr. Vickers."

"Rosie." She stood and shook his hand. "See you then."

* * *

John whistled as he walked in the door of the brownstone. He loosened his tie and tossed his briefcase on the table and wandered into the kitchen. He spied the note on the table and grabbing a bottle of water, read it. 

**_John-Boy,_**

**_Don't worry about dinner. Dad and I will grab something and bring it home. Please…don't cook! I've been on the other side of your culinary experiences too many times. See you later._**

**_Scott_**

John chuckled to himself at his elder brother's attempt at humor. "Good, if they're bringing home take out, then I don't have to cook." He tossed the note in the trash, and grabbing his briefcase, went up to the office.

It was sometime later when he heard the door open. "John? You home?"

"Up here Scott!" John called back. A moment later, Scott walked into the office. "Hey, how'd the doctor's go?"

Scott shrugged and sat down, propping his feet on the desk. Ignoring his brother's angry glare, he sighed. "OK I guess. Surgery is on Thursday."

John's eyes opened wide. "_This_ Thursday?" Scott nodded. "Wow, that's fast."

"Yeah." Scott took a swig from John's water bottle, earning himself another glare. "Good thing though. Doesn't give me time to think about it and change my mind."

John laid down his pen and leaned back in his chair. "What happened Scott?"

Scott sighed again. "Things just…got out of control. You left and I tried to hold things together. But I'm not you." He held his hand up to stem John's protests. "I'm not blaming or criticizing you. You asked."

John took a deep breath. "Yeah, I did. But how did my leaving screw up your shoulder?"

"That part was all me. I overdid. Figured I could do everything and found out the hard way that I can't." He took his feet down and got to his feet, pacing the room. He turned to look at his brother. "John, are you happy? Really happy?"

John smiled softly. "Yeah Scott, I am." He sighed. "I had a job interview today."

Scott looked up at him in surprise. "You what?"

John shrugged. "I had a job interview. Can't live off my trust fund forever you know." He smiled thinly.

"Where?"

"MIT. There's an opening in their astro-research department."

Scott's heart pounded in his chest. "So, did you get the job?" John looked up at his brother and nodded. Scott took a deep breath. "John…"

"I can't do it Scott. I can't go back…there." He gestured upwards. "I thought I could. That I'd take a few weeks, sort things out and come back home." He shook his head. "I hadn't counted on Christa."

Scott sighed. "You think she's the one?"

John nodded. "I love her Scott." He said simply.

Scott smiled. "Then go for it Blondie."

A huge weight lifted off John's chest. "Thanks Scott."

"John? I…the doctor wants me close for therapy. Can I…" His voice trailed off.

"Sure. Stay here, you and Dad. Sorry I was such a jerk last night. I just wasn't expecting you. A call would have been nice."

"I guess Dad and I never thought about it. We've been dropping in here since I was ten."

"Yeah, you're right." John got up and started towards the door. "I have to go meet Christa. I have some major making up to do."

Scott grinned. "Good thing you have that trust fund after all."

John laughed. "Guess you're right. We'll be back for dinner."

"Later John." Scott sighed and rested his forehead against the window, his thoughts in turmoil. He started in surprise when he felt John slip his arm around his waist, resting his head on Scott's back, and giving him a quick hug.

"I'm glad you're here Scott." John said quietly and was gone.

* * *

John stood by the hospital elevator, waiting for Christa. He held a package of pink roses in his arms, hoping they would save his life. He smiled at a few of the nurses leaving then he spied Christa and his smile faded. 

She looked over and narrowed her eyes at him, then finished her conversation before walking over to him. "I'm surprised to see _you_ here." She said shortly.

_Uh-oh. I'm in more trouble than I thought._ John forced a grin. "Hey. Thought I'd give you a ride home."

She arched an eyebrow at him. "You heading over to Park Drive?"

John sighed. "Christa, can we talk about this in the car?"

She "hmmphed" in reply but followed John down to the Jeep. John handed her the flowers and she gave him a icy stare in return. He sighed and started the car.

"I'm sorry." He said finally, when the silence had gone on too long.

"OK, you're sorry." She replied without looking at him.

"Christa please…"

She turned, her indigo eyes dark with anger. "What John? I'm tired of this bullshit! Every time something doesn't go your way, you go drown your sorrows in a bottle!" She shot at him.

"That's not true."

"Yes John, it is!" She let out a frustrated sigh. "It's become your norm. After a nightmare, talking to your family, if we have an argument. John, can't you see what you're doing to yourself?"

John pulled the Jeep up in front of the house and rested his head on the steering wheel. "I know, I've been an idiot. And I have no excuse other than the fact that it's easier than facing the truth sometimes. It's like something…or someone is pushing me. Talking to me in my head." He looked over at her. "I'm trying Christa."

"Could have fooled me last night."

His blue eyes flashed in anger. "What more do you want from me?"

"I want you to stop drinking so much John!"

John's hands clenched around the steering wheel. "Last night was an accident. Scott and my father surprised me that's all. I didn't even think. I figured I'd just go for a walk and clear my head. I didn't mean to end up in a bar."

"You say that every time John."

John shook his head in frustration. "Look, I said I was sorry, that I won't let it happen again."

"I want to believe you." She paused. "I had a nice chat with your father last night."

He looked sharply at her. "What about?"

"You of course. John he's worried about you."

John looked back out the windshield. "He's just saying that."

"No, he's not. You didn't hear him last night. He's here because of Scott's surgery, but I think he was glad for the excuse to see you."

John shook his head. "No, Scott always came first."

She sighed. "I think you're wrong John. He loves you and you're driving him away. You're driving us all away." She placed a hand on his arm and her tone softened. "I love you John, but this is killing me, watching you like this."

"Yeah well, it's no picnic for me either." He muttered. Then he sighed and took his hand in hers. "I'm sorry Christa. Please…" His voice cracked with emotion.

"John, we're just trying to help you."

"I know."

"Then let us."

John sighed and clenched his eyes shut. "I…I'll try."

"That's all I can ask." She smiled softly. "So, did you get me another necklace?" She asked, trying to ease the tension.

He chuckled. "No, just the roses this time."

"Well, I guess I'll have to think about it then."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "I thought you didn't care about material gifts?"

She smiled impishly. "I lied."

John rolled his eyes and laughed. "C'mon, let's see what Dad and Scott brought home for dinner."

"Anything's better than _your_ cooking." Christa teased.

"Hey, my pasta was fine last night."

"You just keep telling yourself that honey." She patted his cheek.

Together they walked into the house.


	26. Chapter 26

Please insert usual disclaimers here. Have a nice day.

* * *

Jeff stood in the doorway, watching his second son.

John was seated at the desk, busily typing away on the computer. He chewed on a pen cap, a habit Jeff loathed, occasionally muttering under his breath. Jeff wasn't sure, but thought it sounded like Russian.

He continued watching as John glanced from the computer to scribble something on the note pad next to him. Finally he tossed his pen across the desk and glared moodily at the computer screen.

Jeff stepped into the room. "Problems son?"

John looked up in surprise. "Dad, I didn't hear you come in." He sighed and tossed the mangled pen cap into the trash.

"What are you working on?" Jeff asked, glancing down at John's notes. _I was right, Russian._ He shook his head and chuckled.

"What?"

Jeff looked up to see a puzzled expression on John's face. "Just wondering how you can think in another language."

John laughed. "Blame my Russian teacher who beat it into me…literally!" Then his smile faded. "Any news on Scott?"

Jeff shook his head. "Not since we dropped him off this morning." Earlier in the day, Jeff had taken Scott to the hospital for his surgery. Rosie had them that the procedure would take at least two to three hours, with recovery being nearly that long. Scott had assured his father that he would be fine, and not to sit around waiting. Rosie promised to call as soon as they were through.

John sighed and glanced at his watch. "I'd have thought we'd have heard something by now."

Jeff nodded and leaned against the desk. "So, you going to tell me what you're working on or do I have to use my rather rusty language skills to figure it out?"

John chuckled. "Nothing much, just finishing up some research I had started before…" His voice trailed off. He shook off the memories. "I'm starving, want a sandwich?" He asked, turning off the computer.

Jeff sighed in defeat. "Sure." They made their way down to the kitchen. John turned on the small TV on the counter then began rummaging in the refrigerator while Jeff got out glasses and plates.

They quickly put together a few sandwiches and sat down at the table. "I talked to Virgil this morning. He and Gordon picked up Brains and Alan last night."

John looked up. "Gordon? He must be feeling better then." He said carefully.

"He is. Steve said he was back to swimming lengths in the pool, slower than usual, but he is back at it."

"Maybe the chlorine will soak into his brain. At this point, it could only be an improvement." John muttered softly to himself.

Jeff frowned at him. "You know, this little feud of yours has gone on long enough, don't you think?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." John mumbled, not looking up, but concentrating on his lunch.

"John."

"What?"

Jeff sighed. "The problem is, you and Gordon are too much alike."

Now John's head snapped up. "We're _what?_" He asked with surprise.

Jeff calmly took another bite of his sandwich. "You two are nearly identical, personality wise. You're both loyal, dependable, have a terrific sense of humor, and..." Jeff's brown eyes bored into John's blue ones. "You're both more stubborn than a pack of mules." He took another bite. "Face it John, Gordon is just a noisier version of you."

"He is not."

"He is too."

"Dad..."

"John." Jeff got up and put his dishes in the sink.

"He started it." John folded his arms across his chest.

"And I expect you to finish it."

John glared at his father and muttered something under his breath. "And speak English if you're going to curse at me." Jeff added, lightly swatting his son on the head.

John sighed and rubbed a hand over his head. "I didn't—"

"_...the Hood."_

Both their heads snapped up to stare at the television, and Jeff quickly turned up the volume.

"_His real name being Trangh Belagant, he attempted to rob the Bank of London in April. He escaped from custody a few weeks later and was apprehended by the Thunderbirds in Malaysia a few days later. The Hood, as he prefers to be called, is scheduled to be arraigned in three weeks."_

John got up and paced the length of the kitchen, before coming to a stop leaning his hands on the counter, his head hanging down, his body trembling. Jeff walked over and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "John, it's going to be alright."

John shook his head. "Sometimes I don't think things will ever be alright again." He said softly.

"Son, he can't hurt you."

John shook his head. "Yes Dad, he can."

"Not if you don't let him."

"You don't understand Dad. He's in my head. Half the time I don't know what's real and what's not!" John's hands clenched into fists. "He twists my thoughts and memories around to the point that the stuff he says sounds...right!"

Jeff stood very still, afraid that if he said or did anything, John would close up again. John straightened and looked up at his father, his blue eyes dark with emotion. "Dad..."

Before he could continue, the phone rang. Jeff groaned inwardly._ Great timing. _He picked up the phone. "Hello?...We'll be there shortly...Thank-you." He turned to John. "That was the hospital. Scott is out of surgery and in recovery. They expect him to wake in the next hour or so."

John forced a smile. "Then let's get going."

Jeff caught his son's arm as he walked past. "John wait. Scott will be a while in coming out of it. Finish your thoughts."

John shook his head. "It's nothing Dad. C'mon, Scott's waiting." Jeff sighed and followed John out to the Jeep. Fifteen minutes later, they were walking through the hallway of the hospital.

Dr. Vickers looked up as they approached the nurse's station. "Scott's surgery went well. The damage wasn't actually as bad as I had feared. Provided he does what he's instructed, I expect a full recovery."

Jeff let out a sigh of relief. "Can we see him?"

Rosie nodded. "He's just coming out of it, and we have him on painkillers, so expect him to be a little out of it." She caught Jeff's look. "He has to be on them for at least a week. After that, we'll start weaning him off. I haven't lost a patient to addiction yet Mr. Tracy. And I don't intend to let that happen with Scott."

"Thank-you Doctor." Jeff replied.

She smiled. "Anytime. Now, go in and see him."

Jeff and John walked into the room. Scott was lying on the bed, IV tubes running into his left arm. There was an oxygen tube in his nose and his right shoulder was heavily bandaged.

Jeff leaned over his son. "Scott? Scott can you hear me?"

Scott's eyelids fluttered. "D-Dad?" He whispered hoarsely.

"I'm here son. How are you feeling?"

"Like...shit..."

"Language Scott." Jeff smiled.

John stepped forward. "Hey there bro."

"John..." Scott's eyes closed.

"Scott? You still there?" John asked frowning.

Scott's eyes fluttered. "Hurts..." He rasped, his eyes closing again.

Jeff stepped up to the bed. "Scott?" He called urgently. His only reply was a low moan. John automatically stepped back, his heart beating painfully in his chest.

The nurse quickly stepped forward and checked Scott's vitals. "He's fine. It's just the anesthetic wearing off."

Jeff let out a sigh of relief. "We'll go grab something to eat, then be back. Coming John?" Jeff turned. "John?"

He was gone.

* * *

John parked the Jeep in front of the house, and hurried up the steps. His hands were shaking so badly that it took three tries for him to get the door unlocked. Once inside, he started immediately towards the liquor cabinet. He poured himself a generous shot of whiskey, and swallowed it in one fast gulp. As he poured himself another, he stopped and caught his reflection in the mirror.

His eyes were bright in his pale face, and the hand holding the drink shook.

_Christa was right. I am a drunk. _

John slammed the glass down, the alcohol spilling over the side. He took a shuddering breath and tore the collar open on his shirt. "Scott's fine...it was routine surgery...he's fine."

He dropped to his knees as the memories rushed over him.

_Scott was slumped on his knees on the floor, his left hand clutching his right shoulder, which in turn was soaked with blood. _

_Hood laughed again and motioned for Mullion to step forward. "I shall enjoy breaking the rest of your body. Then when I'm finished with you, I'll have a bit of fun with your brother. By the time I'm through, he'll be begging me to kill him." Mullion sneered._

"No...Scott..." John clutched his temples as the memories continued.

"_Scott! Don't do this! Stay with me!"_

_Jeff broke into a run, John, Penny and Gordon following at his heels. They arrived at the door to the medical bay together. "Virgil, what's going on?" _

_Virgil was standing next to Scott, working furiously. Scott was hooked up to the scanner, which was emitting a dull tone. His face was deathly white, and he lay unmoving. "I'm losing him! His heart keeps stopping!"_

_Jeff rushed forward, taking Scott's hand in his own. "Scott! Scott wake up!"_

"Scott...Scott...Please don't die...This is all my fault." John choked back a sob. "All my fault..."

* * *

It was late on Tracy Island. The sun was nearly set, but the lights of the villa were warm and bright.

Tin-Tin's head snapped up from where she was sitting by the pool. "John!"

Alan and Fermat both stopped their game of water volleyball. "Tin-Tin?" Alan swam over and placed a hand on her knee. "Tin-Tin, what's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Alan! We need to find your father!" She looked around in confusion.

Alan glanced at Fermat. "Tin-Tin! He's in Boston, with Scott, remember?" Alan said softly.

She frowned. "Then we need to call him. Hurry!" She got to her feet and ran inside the villa.

"Tin-Tin, wait!" Alan pulled himself out of the pool and without stopping for a towel, followed on her heels. Rushing down the hallway, he ran smack into Virgil.

"Hey! Easy there Sprout!" Virgil frowned. "You're not supposed to be running in the house, let alone doing it dripping wet."

Alan shrugged off his brother's grip. "Did Tin-Tin come through here?"

"I don't—" Whatever else Virgil was about to say was cut off as Alan raced down the hallway.

Fermat appeared in the same condition. "Virgil did A-A-A—"

"He went that way." Virgil pointed down the hallway.

"Th-thanks!" Fermat ran after Alan.

Virgil sighed. "Somehow, I don't think this is good news." He hurried after them.

He finally caught up with Alan in their father's office. Tin-Tin was sitting on the floor, her hands pressed against her head, Fermat gripping her shoulder. Alan was frantically pressing buttons on the phone.

"Somebody want to explain what the heck is going on here?" Virgil demanded.

Alan glanced up briefly. "It's John." He then turned his attention back to the phone. "Dad!"

"_Alan, is everything alright?"_

"No Dad! Where are you? Where's John?"

"_I'm at the hospital with Scott. John's disappeared."_

Alan glanced towards Tin-Tin. She looked up, her eyes golden. "He's at the brownstone."

Alan turned back to the phone. "Dad, he's gone back to the house. You have to hurry!"

"_FAB son."_ Jeff quickly signed off, and Alan dropped to Tin-Tin's side.

Virgil folded his arms across his chest. "Ahem."

They all looked up. Virgil stood glaring at them. Alan grinned sheepishly. "Hey Virgil. I found her."

"I can see that. Want to tell me what that was all about?"

"John."

Virgil walked over and helped Tin-Tin to her feet, then led her over to the couch. "Talk to me honey. What happened to John?"

She shook her head to clear it. "It wasn't my un...the Hood."

Now it was Alan's turn to frown. "It wasn't? Then what?"

She looked up at him. "I'm not sure exactly. But I could..._hear_ John. He's very, very upset about." She shook her head. "It has something to do with Scott."

"Scott!" Alan yelped.

"Chill Sprout." Virgil turned back to Tin-Tin. "Do you know what happened?"

Tin-Tin shook her head. "No, just that John is in terrible pain. Not physical pain, but emotional."

"And you're sure the Hood has nothing to do with this?" She nodded. "Alright then, all of you off to bed, it's late." Virgil held his hand up to stem off Alan's protests. "I'll let you know as soon as I hear something Alan."

Alan glared at his brother. "You'd better."

"I promise. Now scat, all of you." Virgil watched as they left the room, then sitting himself in his father's chair, prepared himself for a long wait.


	27. Chapter 27

As usual, I don't own 'em so please don't sue. Enjoy!

* * *

Jeff tore up the front steps, hesitating briefly beside the open door to the brownstone. Not even wanting to contemplate what that might mean, he rushed inside. "John! JOHN!"

A low moan alerted his attention and he spun towards the living room. "John!"

John was crouched on his knees, his arms wrapped around himself, rocking back and forth. "No...my fault..."

Jeff knelt down next to his son. "John?" He called softly.

John didn't reply, but continued his rocking, his eyes clenched tightly shut.

"Son? Talk to me." Jeff placed his hand on John's shoulder.

John struck like a snake, his fist connecting solidly with his father's face. Jeff fell back, blood trickling from his lip, staring up at his son in surprise.

"Where is he? What have you done with him?" John growled, his fists still clenched.

"Who? What are you talking about?"

"My brother dammit! What have you done with him?"

He advanced forward, and Jeff scrambled to get out of the way. "John, stop! It's me, your father!"

"Liar!" John swung again, only this time Jeff was anticipating the move and swung his leg, catching John about the knees. John went down hard, but quickly recovered.

Both men scrambled to their feet and circled each other warily. "I'll kill you if you've hurt him." John snarled, his eyes not quite sane. He swung again and Jeff narrowly avoided the punch.

"John! Stop!" He ducked as John swung again.

"Where's Scott? What have you done to my brother?" John advanced on Jeff, his face grim. "I'll kill you..."

Jeff blocked John's next punch and instinctively sent one of his own flying. John went sailing into the coffee table, the wood cracking under his weight.

Jeff looked to where his son lay sprawled across the broken pieces of the table then glanced down at his own clenched fists and took a shuddering breath. _Dear God! What have I done?_ He dropped to his knees next to John. "Son? I'm sorry...I'm so, so sorry!"

"Dad? What?" John's eyes cleared and he shook his head. "Dad!" The last came out in a sob as John threw himself into his father's arms.

Jeff held his son awkwardly until the strain on his back was too much. "John? I need to get up son." John pulled back a little and Jeff got stiffly to his feet. He gingerly sat down on the couch and a moment later, John was back in his arms, sobbing as if his heart would break.

Feeling helpless, Jeff could only hold his son as he let loose all his pent up emotions.

"Shouldn't have told you...all my fault..." John kept repeating over and over.

"Told me what John?" Jeff asked softly.

John shook his head. "Scott...my fault..." He said brokenly.

Jeff frowned in puzzlement and ran his hand over John's head, murmuring soothingly. After what seemed like hours, Jeff felt John start to pull away. He watched in silence as John sat on the edge of the couch, his head in his hands, his body still trembling with emotion.

"John?" Jeff called quietly a few minutes later.

"I'm sorry." John whispered.

"Sorry for what son?"

John shook his head. "I can't...it's all my fault..." He took a shuddering breath and got to his feet, pacing the length of the room, coming to stop in front of the large bay window. "If I had never sent that mayday, you wouldn't have come and Hood never would have gotten us." He said hoarsely, staring out at nothing.

_Dammit, Virgil was right... _"John, that's not true." Jeff got up and walked to his son's side. "Why do you doubt that I would have come? You were hurt. No matter what had hit you, meteor, missile or even a UFO, **I would have been there**. And before you say it, your brothers felt the same way. Scott didn't even try for the pilot's seat and do you know why?" John shook his head. "So he could be out first. He had no other thoughts than to get to **you**." Jeff sighed. "John, I've left you alone hoping you'd find the peace you need and now I'm wondering if I was wrong to do that. What _really_ happened up there?"

John continued staring out the widow. Long minutes went by. "I didn't think you heard me..." He whispered finally. "I was working on some...research when the proximity alarm went off." He closed his eyes, shuddering against the memories.

"_**RED ALERT!"**_

_John jumped up from where he was working and rushed to the main controls. "What the—"_

"_**Warning—Impact imminent."**_

_Something was aiming straight for the space station, its impact probability increasing by the second. He stood staring at the screen until he realized what was happening _

"_Thunderbird 5 to Tracy Island! Mayday! MAYDAY!"_

_The explosion ripped through the command center, sending him sailing across the station. He hit the back wall of the bulkhead and everything went dark._

"When I came to, the first thing I was aware of was the pain." John said, his voice quiet. "My back, my head, my shoulder...There was smoke and fire everywhere. I tried to get up before I realized I had broken ribs on top of everything else." He took a deep breath. "I finally got my brain working and figured out it hadn't been a meteor, but a missile. I tried to raise you, to tell you to stay back, but there was nothing. No reply at all either from the Island or Thunderbird 3."

"We were being jammed." Jeff told him. "We never got anything after your initial mayday."

"I didn't know that at the time." John sighed. "I knew I had to do something or I would lose what little power I had left. I made it to the console and tried to do some repairs, but I was too dizzy and only ended up burning my hands. God, it hurt to breathe and my back..." He took a shuddering breath. "I must have blacked out again, because next thing I knew, there was Thunderbird 3 in my windows. Then, the alarms started again..."

"_I'm losing all power...Repeat, I'm losing all power..."_

"_Hang on John, we're coming in."_

"You have no idea what I felt when I heard your voice. Relief that I wasn't alone..." John looked up at his father, his blue eyes filled with emotion. "Fear that I had called you to your deaths."

Jeff placed his hand on John's arm. "I would have come John, no matter what. You could have been being attacked by an army and I still would have come." Jeff told him, his brown eyes boring into his son's. "What happened today John?"

John turned back to the window. "Seeing Scott lying there, it brought back seeing him in the mine. After Mullion shot him..." He clenched his eyes shut. "I'm sorry Dad." He whispered.

"Stop saying that John. You have nothing to be sorry for." Jeff paced the room. "Dammit John! Don't you think I have the same fears! I was terrified when we saw the station. I couldn't believe we'd find you alive. And as to the mine incident, none of us expected it to turn out the way it did. I almost lost all of you that day. It was one of the worst days of my life." Now it was Jeff's turn to shudder. "How do you think I felt seeing you on the bed in the infirmary, fighting for your life?"

John smiled softly. "I'm a Tracy. We're tough."

Jeff chuckled. "That we are."

John's smile faded. "But the Hood..."

"He's a mad-man John. The authorities will see that he is brought to justice this time. That he won't ever hurt anyone again."

"If only I could believe that." John walked back over to the bar and stared down at the whiskey bottle. "He's in my head Dad. He tells me things...things that start to make sense..."

"He's lying."

John shook his head. "That's the scary part, he's not." He looked up at his father. "I hear him all the time Dad. He won't leave me alone." He sat back down on the couch and put his head in his hands. "I can't do this anymore Dad. I just want it to stop...Or by God I'll find some way to _make _it stop."

The utter conviction in John's voice sent a chill up Jeff's spine. "John, don't talk that way."

Before John could reply, they heard the front door open. "Hello? Anyone home?"

"In here babe." John sighed. "Dad, don't mention this to her. I've told her a highly edited version of events. I don't need our stories crossing."

"Maybe you should just tell her the truth."

John's eyes widened in surprise as Christa breezed into the room. "Hey honey." She leaned over from behind the sofa and placed a soft kiss on the top of John's head. "Hi Mr. T."

Jeff rolled his eyes, but laughed. "Hello Christa."

"I looked in on Scott. Rosie says things are looking good." She walked around to the front of the couch. "I figured you two would be there—John! What's wrong!"

John looked up at her, his face pale and tear streaked. "It's nothing Christa. Just reliving some bad memories."

She sat down and looked closely at him. "About your attack?"

John nodded. "Yeah some. Seeing Scott today brought back some things I'd rather forget."

"Oh honey..." She pulled him close and met Jeff's eyes. He tried to smile encouragingly. "Why don't I go start supper, while you two finish talking." Christa told them.

John pulled away and shook his head. "No, I think I'll just go lay down a bit." He got to his feet and made his way out of the room.

Once John was out of earshot, Christa turned to Jeff. "What happened?" She demanded.

Jeff held his hands up. "You heard him. He had a hard time seeing his brother."

"Bullshit!" Christa folded her arms across her chest. "Are you going to start lying to me too?"

"Christa..."

"Don't say it! Don't say you're not lying because I know—" A crash from upstairs made them both look up.

"John!" Jeff bolted from the room, Christa at his heels.

John was on his knees on the first stair landing, his hands pressed against his head.

"John!" Jeff called again as he raced up the stairs. He knelt by his son. "What's wrong?"

John looked up with pain filled eyes. "Headache...migraine...God..." His voice trailed off.

Christa pushed by Jeff and placed on hand on John's forehead and the other at his wrist. "Pulse is a little high. Let's get you up to bed."

"Good idea." Jeff helped John to his feet. He swayed unsteadily for a moment, then nodded. Jeff helped his son up the stairs to his room.

John collapsed down on the bed, pressing his hands to his eyes. "Christa, do you have anything for this?"

Christa frowned in concern. "Is it that bad honey?"

John nodded then wined. "Yeah...it's that bad."

"Stay here while I get my bag." She hurried from the room.

Jeff sat down on the bed next to his son. "Is it a headache or..."

John cracked his eyes open. "Headache. He's usually more subtle than this. I think it's just from the stress."

"You sure?"

John nodded and eased himself to a sitting position, resting his head in his hands. "Jesus, how does anyone live through these things..." He moaned.

Jeff placed his hand on John's neck and rubbed lightly. "Your mother used to get them when...you're not pregnant are you?" Jeff grinned.

John looked up at his father and laughed, then grimaced. "Don't make me laugh..."

"Sorry son."

Christa came back in, her bag in hand. She set it on the night stand and rummaged through it. "Hmmm...I have migraine meds, but only in injection form."

John's head snapped up. "Injection?"

Christa nodded. "Sorry John."

He groaned. "I guess if that's what I have to do."

"Roll up your sleeve." Holding the syringe between her teeth, she wiped John's arm with an alcohol swap then plunged the needle into him.

John yelped in surprise. "Warn a guy next time will you!" John grumbled. He let out another wince as she withdrew the needle and held a gauze pad over the wound.

"Just sit a minute." She ordered him when he tried to get up.

"Christa, if you don't let me get up I'm going to throw up on your feet." John stumbled to his feet and rushed to the bathroom. A moment later they could hear the sounds of him being violently ill.

Jeff frowned. "Is he alright? Should we call a doctor?"

Christa shook her head. "No, it's a typical migraine symptom. I'll keep a close watch on him. If he's not feeling better in a few hours, then we'll call someone." She sighed. "I am concerned however that he asked for meds. I've never met anyone with such an aversion to medicine before."

"John's my stubborn one. He wouldn't take a band-aid if he were bleeding to death." He chuckled. "You should have seen him when he had his tonsils out. His mother and I had to crush the medicine and put it in his drink. And this when he was all of ten years old." Jeff smiled fondly at the memory.

"So this is nothing new then?"

Jeff shook his head. "No nothing new." They both looked up as the bathroom door opened. "Feeling any better son?"

John was deathly pale, his eyes glassy. He had stripped down to a pair of shorts and held the door frame for support. "I think I want to die." He muttered as he collapsed down on the bed with a groan. He pulled the covers up over his head and lay still.

Christa sat down on the edge of the bed. "Want me to stay here with you?"

"No." Came the muffled reply.

Jeff laughed softly. "Get some rest son."

"I would if you people would get out and let me."

Christa bit back a laugh of her own. "I'll be back later to check on you."

"Bye."

Jeff turned to Christa and smiled. "Isn't he a wonderful patient?"

"When are you two going to get out and let me die?"

Together Jeff and Christa left John in his misery. They went downstairs to the kitchen. "I'm starving, want a sandwich?" Christa asked.

"That would be wonderful." Jeff got out glasses and poured them each a drink as Christa made them a couple of sandwiches. They sat down and started eating in silence. Finally Christa looked up at Jeff. "If you want to go back to the hospital, Scott should be more with it by now. I can stay here with John."

Jeff nodded thoughtfully. "I may just do that." He sighed. "I feel like I'm being pulled in two different directions."

Christa placed a hand on his arm. "Go see Scott. John will be out of it for a couple of hours at least. I'll call you if anything changes, I promise."

Jeff squeezed her hand. "Thank-you Christa. I can see why John is in love with you."

She blushed and looked down. "I love him right back."

"I'm glad. He needs someone strong to stand by him. I have a feeling his opening up to me tonight was just the beginning."

Christa looked up, a fierce determination in her indigo eyes. "I'm not going anywhere sir."

Jeff smiled. "Good. I'll be back later."

Christa cleaned up the few dishes in the sink and made her way back upstairs. John seemed to be asleep and hadn't appeared to have moved since they had left him. "John?" She called softly.

"Mmmmm?"

She sat down next to him. "How are you feeling?"

John peeled the blankets off his head and blinked owlishly up at her. "Like shit." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "The medicine seems to be working though. At least I can see only one of you now."

Christa frowned. "You were seeing double?" She took something out of her bag. "Lay back and relax. Look past me to the stars on the ceiling." He did and she shone a small penlight into his eyes. After a moment, she shut it off and took his pulse. "Anything else wrong?"

John eased himself to a sitting position. "No, not really."

"No or not really?"

"Christa..."

"OK, just checking to make sure this is only a headache."

"It is." He got to is feet and after waiting for the dizziness to pass, walked into the bathroom. She heard him get sick again and sighed.

"John?" She called out, going into the bathroom. He was sitting on the edge of the tub, his head in his hands. "It's a side effect of the meds John. Let's get you back to bed." She helped him to his feet and they made their way back to the bedroom.

Once again John collapsed with a moan, only this time he went instantly to sleep without saying another word. Christa tucked the blankets around him and settled herself down on the window seat to wait until he awoke.


	28. Chapter 28

Sorry for the delay! That real life stuff again. As usual, I don't own them. If I did...well, we won't go there. Enjoy!

* * *

Tin-Tin crept quietly through the house. It was a little after dawn and it was doubtful that anyone other than herself would be up. Virgil seldom rose before nine, and Alan was the same. Gordon was a possibility, but with his back, she suspected he too was still in bed. And with Scott, Jeff and John gone..._I never thought the island could be this quiet. Even** with** Gordon around._

She paused on the terrace overlooking the pool and gazed out over the sea. She was so lost in the scenery that the sound of footsteps behind her startled her and she whirled, fists clenched.

"Relax my daughter." Kyrano smiled.

Tin-Tin's fists unclenched and she broke into a smile. "Good morning Dad. You just surprised me."

He beckoned her over to one of the patio tables and they sat down. "You are troubled Tin-Tin. Your mother and I can sense it."

She sighed. "There's been alot happening."

"You are very brave my daughter."

Tin-Tin's head snapped up. "What?"

"You are very brave taking on my brother...Trangh, the way you have." He smiled. "I am proud of you Tin-Tin."

Tin-Tin blushed and fidgeted with her hands. "John is my family. I had to help him." She looked up at her father. "Dad? Can he...the Hood...Can he hurt me like he is John?"

Kyrano shook his head. "No. You are protected."

She frowned in confusion. "Protected? How?"

Now it was Kyrano's turn to look away. "By me."

"By you?"

Kyrano sighed. "I too have...power."

Tin-Tin's coffee eyes opened wide. "What?"

Kyrano nodded at his daughter. "I am an empath. I can sense feelings, but only if the person is close."

Tin-Tin nodded in understanding. "That's how you always know the right things to say!"

Kyrano laughed. "Yes, I suppose it is." Then he sobered. "But never would I use this for my own purposes. That would be wrong."

"But how does that protect me from the Hood?" Tin-Tin asked.

"Because you are mine." Kyrano said simply.

Tin-Tin grew quiet. "I haven't told them everything." She said a few minutes later. "About what he's planning." Kyrano frowned and she continued. "He is going to kill John."

Kyrano leaned forward. "How?" He demanded.

She shook her head. "I don't know. But he's going to kill him. To hurt Mr. Tracy." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "And I don't know how to stop him."

"You are stronger than you believe Tin-Tin. And so is Mr. John. Together you can beat him. And do you know why?" Tin-Tin shook her head. "Love. Trangh doesn't know the meaning of love. To him, power is everything. And that is why he will fail."

Tin-Tin shook her head. "I don't know if I can...he's so strong."

"And so are you."

"Not like he is"

"Tin-Tin, you have to believe in yourself. He has no power over you. He has no true power over John. He is merely using John's own doubts against him."

She looked up at her father, tears pooling in her eyes. "He hurts John. And John's pain hurts me."

Kyrano took her into his arms. "Daughter, you can do this. You are like a river. Ever flowing, ever changing. Calm and serene on the surface, but turbulent underneath." He tilted her chin up to look deep into her eyes. "Remember, even the stillest waters can erode the strongest stone."

Tin-Tin smiled and hugged her father close. "Thanks Dad."

He chuckled. "Master Alan is looking for you. Tell him what you have told me. You are stronger together than you are apart." He smiled again and made his way back to the house.

Tin-Tin looked up as Alan came out of the bushes by the side of the pool. "Tin-Tin..."

"Alan, I need to talk to you." She smiled and beckoned him to sit down next to her.

* * *

Scott trembled with exertion as he manipulated the pulley with his right arm. He held it for a few seconds, then let the weight fall with a crash. "Dammit!" He cursed, breathing heavily.

The physical therapist smiled. "Great job Scott."

Scott snorted. "Yeah, right."

"Seriously! You've lifted almost five pounds. Most patients take three or four days to work up to that." Her tone sobered. "But don't overdo. You don't want to damage that shoulder further. Take it slow. You're doing fine. I'll be back later this afternoon."

Scott merely scowled as she left and idly rubbed his shoulder. The door opened again and he looked up to see his father and brother walk in. "Hey, was wondering if you were going to show up today." Scott's smile faded as he stared closely at his family. John had a shiner under his left eye, and Jeff was nursing a fat lip. "What the hell happened to you two?" He demanded.

John shrugged in his father's direction. "He hit me."

Jeff gave his second eldest a bland glare. "You hit me first."

Scott stared in disbelief as they both grinned at each other. John even laughed. "Someone want to explain all this?" Scott grumbled.

Just as Jeff was about to speak, the door opened again and Dr. Vickers walked in. "Good morning Tracy's. Scott, Heather tells me you did well this morning."

Scott sighed. "If you call lifting five pounds a couple of times _well_..." He muttered.

Rosie frowned at him. "Are you calling her a liar?" She marched over and looked Scott square in the eye. "I told you before that this was going to be a long, hard road. Attitude is half the battle. And right now, your piss-poor one is going to be your downfall." Her tone was icy.

Scott turned red and dropped his gaze. Rosie took a step back and glanced down at his chart in her hands. "Well, the good news is that the damage wasn't as bad as we originally thought from the X-rays. If you keep up with the therapy," She glared at him briefly. "I expect a ninety-five percent recovery use rate. Which, let me tell you, is fantastic. Normally it's only around eighty percent. Now, how much pain are you in?"

Scott shrugged. Or tried to, the ache in his shoulder causing him to grimace. "Some I guess. It's not too bad."

"Scott. I promise you I'm not going to pump you up on painkillers. I'm monitoring your meds very, very carefully. I haven't lost a patient to addiction yet, and I don't intend to start with you." Her voice softened. "Scott, pain _will_ hinder your progress. Trust me. I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

Scott finally looked up and smiled thinly. "Thanks Doc." He said softly.

"You're welcome." She turned and smiled at Jeff and John. "I'll see you tomorrow." With that, she marched out of the room.

John watched her go, then turned and raised an eyebrow at his brother. "That's your doctor?" Scott nodded. "Jesus, she's terrifying."

"That she is." Jeff agreed. He turned back to Scott. "So, how are you feeling today son?"

"Not too bad I guess." Scott shifted himself on the bed. "But forget about me. I ask again, what the hell happened?"

John ran a hand through his hair. "Let's just say I had a rough night, and Dad happened to be in the way." He said quietly, staring down at the floor.

Scott started to reply but Jeff frowned and shook his head. Scott sighed and changed the subject. "I managed to lift five pounds for about ten minutes day. Big freaking deal. I used to be able to bench press half my weight!"

Jeff sat down in the chair next to the bed. "But that was before. Take it slow son. Rosie was right."

"I know. It's just so damned frustrating."

John sat down on the edge of the bed. "Yeah, but look at the perks you're getting."

Scott shot his brother a dirty look. "Perks? What the hel...heck kind of perks do you think I'm getting in here?"

John broke into an easy grin. "Well, the daily sponge baths for one."

Scott laughed. "Well that's true."

Jeff groaned. "I don't think I want to hear this."

"Although, I wonder how much the nurses _really_ enjoy it." John winked.

"Oh the nurses enjoy it just fine. Trust me." Scott replied wiggling his eyebrows.

Scott and John laughed at their father's expression. "What's the matter Dad, don't want to hear about Scotty's sex life?" John teased.

Jeff groaned again and put his face in his hands. "I'm not listening to this."

"C'mon Dad, you really think John and Christa are upstairs lying chaste in John's bed?" Scott quipped.

"We are chaste in my bed. It's yours you should worry about." John shot back.

Scott stared at his younger brother for a moment, before he burst out laughing, then winced. "Damn...Don't make me laugh Johnny."

John just grinned, his blue eyes twinkling. Jeff let out a sigh of relief. _This_ was the son he knew, not the empty shell that had been walking around for the past few months.

John eased back, pulling one leg up on the bed. "So, Scotty, anything **I** can do for you?"

Scott shook his head, then looked up. "Food! The food here sucks! Think you could smuggle me in a pizza?"

To both Jeff and Scott's surprise, John paled. "I'll...I'll see what I can do." He glanced down at his watch. "Gotta run. Talk to you later bro." With a nod at his father, John quickly left the room.

"What the heck did I say?" Scott asked, puzzled.

Jeff frowned after John. "I have no idea." He sighed.

"He was laughing and joking just a minute ago?" Scott frowned. "Dad? What happened last night?"

Jeff turned back to Scott. "He had a…episode."

Scott shifted to a more comfortable position on the bed. "What kind of episode?"

"Seeing you yesterday brought him back to the attack on Five."

"Shit..."

"Scott."

Scott sighed. "I wish he'd just talk to someone!"

"He did." Jeff paced the short length of the room. "I walked in as he was reliving your ambush in the mine." He ran his hand through his hair. "He didn't know where he was, he thought I had done something to you. He swung a few times, connected once." Jeff fingered his lip. "And I'm ashamed to say I hit back. I didn't even think, I just reacted. Seeing him, laying there on the floor..." Jeff suppressed a shudder.

Scott shifted again, trying to get comfortable. "Then what?"

"He talked about the initial attack on Five. Let out some of his fears. God, you were right Scott, I never should have let him go back." Jeff leaned against the window sill and clenched his eyes shut. "And I should have made him stay, not let him come here alone."

Scott got to his feet, and after swaying unsteadily for a moment, walked over to his father. "Dad don't. None of this was your fault. It was Hood's."

"Some of it was. I should be able to see what's going on with my own family."

"Yeah, and if wishes were horses, beggars would ride." Scott grinned sheepishly at his father's expression. "Grandma used to say it."

Jeff smiled softly. "That she did."

"So, he get you with his fist, or his roundhouse kick?" Scott grinned.

"Fist. But he tried the leg thing." Jeff rubbed his back in remembrance. "Who taught him that little trick anyway?"

"Kyrano I think. John's always been so much...slighter than the rest of us, so he taught him a few moves." He winced as he massaged his shoulder.

"I guess the hell he did." Jeff sighed. "He got another headache last night."

Scott's head snapped up. "Hood?"

Jeff shook his head. "John claims no. That it was just a migraine."

"John doesn't get migraines."

"I know." Jeff sighed. "It was bad enough that he asked Christa for something to help."

Scott looked up, his pain momentarily forgotten. "What? John asked for meds? You're kidding?"

"I wish I was."

Scott fidgeted again and idly rubbed his shoulder. "Damn this hurts." He muttered.

Jeff frowned. "Want me to get the doctor?"

Scott shook his head. "No, I want to get through this on my own Dad." He slowly paced the room. "Has John said anything else?"

Jeff shook his head. "No, but it was nice to see the two of you acting almost..."

"Normal?"

"Scott..." Jeff said, a touch of rebuke in his voice.

"What Dad? Like John's been himself the past few months? Today I felt like I got my brother back. I'll do anything I can to make sure he stays." Scott grimaced as he flexed his shoulder.

"We all would."

Scott sighed. "I was thinking...maybe Virg and the others could come when I get out. We haven't all been together since...Well it would be nice to have everybody here."

"I'll check with John. I don't want it to look like we're all ganging up on him."

Scott glared at his father. "We wouldn't be 'ganging up on him.' We're family for God's sake!" He took a shuddering breath, sill massaging his shoulder.

"Why don't you let me get—"

"I hate feeling this way!" Scott exploded suddenly.

"Scott..." Jeff started.

"I just want everything to go back to normal Dad! John, me, EVERYTHING!" The last word came out a shout and the nurse came rushing in.

"Scott! You shouldn't be out of bed! Come now, back you go." She easily steered him back to the bed. "Lie down, that's it." She held his wrist and took his pulse. "I'm going to get you something for the pain." Scott started to shake his head. "Scott, just enough to take the edge off, I promise. I'll be right back." She hurried from the room.

Jeff sat down next to his son. Scott had gone pale and his face was bathed in sweat. "Dad, I can't do this..." He whispered hoarsely.

"Yes you can Scott." Jeff told him firmly. Scott started to shake his head. "Scott, listen to me. You're going to be fine. You—**We're** going to get through this, understand?"

Scott looked deep into his father's brown eyes and saw the conviction there. "Thanks Dad." The nurse came back in and quickly administered the painkiller. Scott winced at the needle, then a few moments later breathed a sigh of relief. The nurse waited a minute longer, the smiling at Jeff, left the room.

Jeff watched as Scott relaxed and closed his eyes. He picked up his son's hand in his own and watched as he slept.

* * *

John made his way through the crowded corridors of the hospital, finally breathing a sigh of relief when he reached the outside. The sun was beating down and instead of hailing a cab, he started walking in the direction of the brownstone. His thoughts were in turmoil as he finally reached the house and marched inside.

He automatically started towards the bar, then paused. Taking a deep breath, he turned instead and walked to the kitchen. He pulled out a bottle of water and sat down at the table, his head in his hands.

"_I could sure use a pizza! Know a place that delivers?"_

"_Thirty minutes or it's free right?"_

John forced the memories from his mind. "Get a grip John. Nothing can hurt you here." He muttered to himself, getting up and starting for the stairs.

"_I beg to differ John."_

The pain dropped him to his knees. "No..."

"_I would have thought the headache last night was a little reminder."_

"That was just a migraine."

"_John, I had forgotten how amusing you are."_

John forced himself to his feet. "You're not here. You can't hurt me!"

"_Oh really?"_

John dropped to his knees again as blood began pouring from his nose. He took a shuddering breath and once again, struggled to his feet. "You're not here!"

"_Are you being stubborn John? Don't force me to hurt you."_

John clenched his teeth. "You **can't** hurt me!" He growled.

"_Oh really?"_

John bit back a scream as his head nearly exploded in pain. His jaw tightened in anger. "**You're. Not. Here.**" He forced himself up the stairs, and peeling off his clothes stepped into the shower.

"_You won't be rid of me that easily John."_ Weaker this time.

"Oh yes I will." John turned the water on full and plunged into it, the hot water cascading over his head and rinsing the blood from his face. "I have family. I don't need you." He felt the pressure in his head ease and the pain slowly ebbed. He took a shuddering breath and turning off the water, stepped out, wrapping a towel around himself. He picked up his bloodstained clothes and scowled. "You son of a bitch. That was a new shirt." He shoved the ruined shirt in the trash before his family could see it and question him about it.

John pulled on a clean set of clothes and paused to stand in the middle of the room. His head was blissfully quiet and he let out a sigh of relief. "And stay gone." John grabbed his car keys and set out to find Christa.

* * *

Across the Atlantic, in a high security jail cell, Hood opened his eyes. "Well, well, my little mouse has grown teeth. I shall have to be more subtle." He let out an evil laugh that echoed down the hallway. 


	29. Chapter 29

Insert usual disclaimers here. Thanks to all who's reading! Hope you're still enjoying it. Thanks to everyone who lets me bounce my plot bunnies off of them!

Warning: Some language in this chapter. Younger readers take note.

* * *

Gordon crept softly through the quiet house. Everyone was asleep and he idly wondered why he wasn't in bed. _Because you idiot, admit it. You missed him too._

He sighed and made his way down the stairs. The flight from the island to Boston had been long even with the powerfully souped up engines of Tracy One. He and Virgil had shared piloting duties, along with telling Alan to "sit down and shut up, he wasn't flying." Alan had finally thrown himself in the back seat of the plane and sat sulking for the rest of the trip.

Gordon had to admit he was glad. The little twerp got on even _his_ nerves sometimes.

He sighed again. It had surprised all of them when Jeff had called, asking them to come to Boston. He would have bet his trust fund that John didn't want to see them, but their father assured them otherwise. And when John took Gordon aside and whispered that he wanted to talk privately, Gordon just couldn't say no. Add the fact that his father caught the whole exchange...

So now here he was, wandering around in the dark, hoping he wouldn't trip and kill himself in the unfamiliar surroundings. He heard a faint noise coming from the kitchen and made his way there.

Gordon peered into the darkened room. "John? You wanted to talk to me?"

"Yeah Gords. I do." Came John's disembodied voice.

Gordon stumbled into something. "Why the hell are you sitting in the dark? Forget to pay the electricity bill?"

"What can I say, I'm used to the dark."

Finally Gordon found the light switch and flipped it. A pale yellow light bathed the kitchen. John was seated at the table, a beer in front of him, his other hand in his lap. Gordon sat down across from him. "So, what did you want to talk about?"

John shrugged and took a long pull from his beer. "Stuff."

"What kind of stuff?"

John took another drink. "You and me kind of stuff."

They sat in silence for a long while. "Well?" Gordon asked finally.

"Well what?"

Gordon rolled his eyes. "Look canary boy, you're the one who wanted to talk. If I'm going to have to drag it out of you, why bother." He got to his feet and started towards the door. "Call me when you decide what you want."

Gordon was halfway to the door when John seemed to materialize in front of him. "I know what I want Gordon." He said in an oddly emotionless voice.

Gordon frowned. "John? What are you—" His voice was cut off with a gasp of pain. Gordon stumbled backwards, crashing into the table. He stared down at the blood blossoming through his shirt then looked up at John, fear in his eyes. "John...why?..." His eyes rolled up in his head and he passed out.

John held the blood covered knife in his hand and smiled.

* * *

Gordon sat bolt upright in bed, his heart beating erratically. He tore the blankets off his chest and peered down at himself.

_A nightmare...it was a fucking nightmare. _

He glanced at his clock and saw that it was a little after 4:00am.

He took a shuddering breath and grabbing his swim trunks, marched outside. He paused by the pool, and knowing no one as there at this early hour, pulled off his pajama pants and slipped into his trunks. He took a deep breath and dove into the water.

He was nearly halfway across the pool when he broke the surface and began cutting through the water with a powerful stride. He continued doing laps until a stitch started in his side. He made his way to the edge of the pool, and hoisted himself out to sit on the edge, his body quivering with exhaustion, his thoughts in turmoil.

"Gordon?"

Gordon's head snapped up as Alan stepped out onto the terrace. "Alan, you scared the crap out of me."

Alan padded up to sit down next to his brother. "You're up early, couldn't sleep?"

Gordon shuddered with the memory of the dream. "You might say that." He glanced over at his younger brother. "You?"

Alan shrugged. "I've been thinking..."

"About?"

"John."

Gordon shivered again. "What about John?"

His voice came out higher than normal and Alan frowned. "What's bothering you Gordon?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing my ass."

Gordon looked up sharply at his brother. "Dad hears you talking like that and you're toast."

Alan snorted. "First off, he's like a million miles away, second, I'm not afraid of the old man."

Gordon raised an eyebrow. "Oh no? What about the time—"

"Shut up Gordon." They both grew quiet. "Tin-Tin and I had a talk the other day." Alan said a few minutes later.

"Oh? Trouble in paradise?" Gordon batted his eyes at his brother.

Alan scowled. "No." He snapped. "She told me...she said Hood is going to try and kill John."

Gordon started in surprise. "What!"

Alan nodded. "She can...hear his thoughts sometimes. Hood wants John dead to get back at Dad."

"Fuck." Gordon got to his feet and started towards the house.

Alan scrambled after him. "Gord wait! Where are you going?"

"I've had it with this Al. We have to do something."

"Yeah? Like what?"

"I don't know!" Gordon stopped and banged his head against the wall. "What the hell _can _we do Alan?"

Alan leaned with his back against the wall next to his brother. "I don't know Gords. Guess we just have to wait and see what happens."

"I'm tired of waiting." Gordon growled. He looked over at his brother, still keeping his forehead on the wall. "Does Dad know about this?"

Alan shook his head. "No. We're going to tell him next time he calls. If John's out of earshot that is. I don't think he needs to hear he has a death threat hanging over him."

Gordon chuckled. "You're right there Sprout." He sighed once more, then straightened. "C'mon, let's see what we can scrounge from the kitchen before the others get up."

Alan brightened. "Great idea!" He bolted down the hallway.

Gordon watched him go, then pushing his nightmare to the back of his head, followed his little brother through the house.

* * *

John stared in confusion at the blood on his hands and clothes. Then he noticed the eight-inch butcher knife in his hands. _What the hell is going on?_

He had just started down the stairs when he heard the scream.

"Virgil get in here! Some one call 911!"

John bolted down the stairs, taking them two at a time and flew into the kitchen. The sight in front of him was horrifying.

Gordon lay on the floor in a puddle of blood. It pooled out from a deep wound in his chest. Virgil was franticly checking him over while Alan stood, unmoving next to him.

Jeff was on the phone, presumably calling for help.

"What happened?" John demanded.

"We found him like this. Some one must have broken in." Scott looked up and froze, his face losing all color. "John, what the fuck did you do?"

John looked down at the knife he still held tightly in his hand. He gasped in shock and dropped the knife to the floor. "No! I...I...It wasn't..."

Now everyone was staring at John, all except Virgil who was still working on Gordon. Jeff shook his attention back to the phone. "Yes, the door's unlocked. Hurry!" He turned back to the boys. "An ambulance is on its way."

Virgil looked up, his tawny eyes filled with tears. "Don't bother. He's dead."

* * *

John bolted upright, his breath coming in ragged gasps. He stared down at his shaking hands, his mind still caught in the nightmare.

Beside him, Christa stirred. "John?" She called sleepily.

He concentrated on breathing evenly. "It's OK, go back to sleep."

She cracked one eye open. "What time is it?"

"A little after six. Go back to sleep."

She mumbled something incoherent and rolled over. John got out of bed and pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He quietly made his way down to the kitchen. He set a mug of cocoa in the microwave and grabbed a bagel. While he was cutting it, he looked at the knife in his hands and dropped both knife and bagel with a clatter.

"John? You're up early."

John whirled at the sound of his father's voice. "Dad! You startled me." He turned back to the counter, his heart pounding in his chest. He picked up the discarded bagel, and with shaking hands, finished cutting it, trying hard to avoid his fingers.

"Sorry son." Jeff poured himself a cup of coffee from the pot. "What are you up to today?" No answer. "John?"

John started. "Huh? Oh, I—I'm not sure yet."

Jeff frowned. John seemed unusually distracted and on edge this morning. "Son? Everything alright?"

John looked up and smiled. "Yeah Dad, everything's fine. Just not awake yet." He popped the bagel in the toaster.

Jeff heard the quaver in John's voice but decided not to push the issue. He didn't want to drive his son away now that he was actually opening up. "Christa off today?" He asked, changing the subject.

"Yes...no. No, she goes in this afternoon." John shook the fog from his head. "You going to see Scott?" John asked as he passed his father the bagel.

"Later this morning." Jeff sat down and peered at the blackened bread in front of him. "John, how can you screw up a bagel?" He quipped.

John glanced down and grinned sheepishly. "It's a gift?" They both laughed and John got out a box of cereal and two bowls.

They ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes. "Scott suggested that we have everyone come out when he gets out of the hospital. I thought—"

"NO!" Jeff looked up in startlement. John forced his voice to sound normal. "No. I...I'm not ready to deal with everyone just yet."

Jeff nodded, not quite convinced that was the real reason. "OK, another time then." He got to his feet and stretched. "I'm headed up to the office to do some paperwork before I head to the hospital. Thanks for breakfast." He said wryly.

John laughed. "Wait until you see what's for lunch!"

"I'd rather not." With a wave, Jeff headed upstairs.

John waited until he knew his father was out of earshot, then hurried to the vid- phone in the living room. Glancing around quickly, he dialed the island.

"_Hello?"_

"Virgil."

Virgil broke into a wide grin. _"John! How are things? Called to cry over your beloved Red Sox?"_

John ignored him. "Virg, where's Gordon?"

Virgil frowned. _"Down in the pool, where else?"_

"Are you sure? Is he alright?"

"_Yeah, he's fine. I was just down there with him. He's currently trying to drown Alan."_ Virgil peered closely at his brother. _"John, what is it?"_

John breathed a sigh of relief and put his face in his hands. "Nothing...It's nothing."

_Talk to me bro."_

John looked up and smiled. "Just forget it Virg. And there's no need to mention to anyone that I called, OK?"

"_John..."_

"Look Virgil, I'll explain later."

"_Yeah, sure you will."_ Virgil didn't sound convinced, but sighed. _"How's Scott?"_

"Doing well. The docs said the damage wasn't as bad as they thought. They're expecting a full recovery." John answered.

"_That's great!"_

"Yeah, it is." John ran a weary hand over his head.

"_How are you feeling?"_

John shrugged. "Fine. Ribs are just about healed. They don't even bother me anymore."

"_Good. They probably would have healed faster if you could stay out of the rip tides."_

John's head snapped up. "How did you know about that?"

"_My spies are everywhere John."_ Virgil grinned. _"Caught it on the news. Nice job by the way."_

John blushed. "Thanks." He muttered quietly, then sighed. "Virg, I have to go. Talk to you later."

"_Sure bro. Say hi to Dad and Scott."_

"FAB." John cut the connection. He leaned back on the couch. _A dream, it was just a damn dream. He can't hurt them. He can't hurt you._

"_Are you sure about that John?"_

"Shut up. I'm not listening to you."

"_Then who are you talking to?"_

John ignored the voice and went into the kitchen. He scribbled a note and left it on the table, then marched out the door without another word.

* * *

Scott stared glumly down at his breakfast tray. The eggs were a runny congealed mass on the plate and the toast had the consistency of cardboard. He tried a sip of coffee and nearly gagged. Pushing the tray away, he stared morosely at the ceiling.

So lost in gloom, he didn't hear the door open. "What's the matter rocket scientist, not hungry?"

Scott looked over to find John standing in the doorway, a brown paper bag in his hands. "Please tell me that's something to eat..."

John grinned lazily. "Maybe it is...maybe it isn't. What's it worth to you?"

"You'll find out, once I get my hands on you." Scott growled.

John merely continued to grin as he peered into the bag. "Let's see what we've got..." He pulled out a cup and smelled, closing his eyes in mock ecstasy. "Mmmm...smells like Jamaican Blue Mountain."

"You son of a bitch, give me that!" Scott leaned forward as far as his injured shoulder would let him and snatched the cup from his brother's hand. He breathed in the scent before taking a sip and sighed. "Thank God..."

John laughed and sat down in the chair next to the bed. "There's more." He rummaged in the bag and came up with an egg and sausage croissant and a half a dozen blueberry muffins. He also pulled out another cup for himself.

Scott wolfed down the breakfast sandwich with relish, than started on the muffins. John snagged one for himself and they sat in comfortable silence.

"Damn I needed that...Thanks Johnny." Scott let out a sigh of contentment.

"No problem Scott."

Scott shifted to a more comfortable position on the bed. "Physical therapy starts in about an hour."

"Want me to leave?"

"Nah." Scott sighed. "I hate being this weak."

John snorted. "You had a shoulder replacement Scott. You're not going to bounce back in a day. It's going to take time." He flashed his brother a smile. "Relax 'Rafa', you'll be back playing Centre Court in no time."

Scott glared. "I can beat your backhand any day weenie-boy."

John narrowed his eyes at his brother. "Is that a challenge?"

"No it's a promise."

Both burst out laughing. "I've missed you Johnny." Scott said, trying to catch his breath.

"I've missed you guys too." John sobered. "Well most of you anyway."

"John..."

John got up and paced the room, one hand on the back of his neck. He came to a stop, staring out the window. "Scott, can I talk to you? And have none of it get back to Dad or the others I mean?"

"Sure John, what's up?"

John was quiet a long time, his gaze never leaving the window. "I think I might be going insane." He said, his voice almost a whisper. "I see things, hear things, things that aren't really there. Things that _can't_ be there." His eyes closed. "I don't know what's real and what's not. I have hours...days that I can't account for! I have no idea where I've been, what I've done. And it's not because I'm drunk." He shook his head. "The drinking helps. At least if I'm too drunk to stand, I'm too drunk to go anywhere...hurt anyone..." His voice trailed off.

"Hurt someone?" Scott frowned in concern. "What are you talking about?"

John sighed. "I get these feelings...urges. I don't know where they come from. I just lash out at whoever's nearest, like that mugger..."

"What mugger?"

He shrugged. "About a month ago, Christa and I were coming back from dinner and some guy jumped us and demanded our wallets. I beat the shit out of him Scott. I would have killed him if Christa wouldn't have stopped me." He paused. "Scary thing is, I enjoyed it."

Scott felt a chill run through him. John's voice was eerily robotic with no trace of his earlier warmth or humor. Not knowing how to respond, he waited for his brother to continue.

"I don't want that to happen to anyone else. I'm thinking about checking myself into a hospital before I hurt someone...or myself."

"Jesus John!" Scott struggled to his feet and walked over to his brother. "Don't talk that way!" He started to place his hand on John's arm.

John jumped back, throwing his hands up in warning. "Don't! Don't touch me!" His eyes were wide with fear. "You don't understand! I killed him Scott. I killed him and I was glad."

Scott shook his head in confusion. "What are you talking about? Killed who?"

John turned away, clenching his eyes shut and leaning on the windowsill. "Gordon. I killed Gordon. I killed my little brother."

"You didn't kill Gordon! For Christ's sake John, I got off the phone with him not an hour ago! What the hell is going on?" Scott demanded.

John grew quiet again. When he finally spoke, his voice was once again cold and emotionless. "I've looked into it you know. I even found a place that sounds perfect. McLean Hospital in Belmont. They specialize in chemical dependency and psychotic disorders. Sounds like just the place for me, don't you think?"

Scott shook his head. "Stop! Stop this! This is crazy John!"

John turned, a small, sad smile on his face. "Crazy, that's me." He turned back to the window. "Ironic isn't it, that Gordon had it right from the beginning. I **am** a liability. To our organization, to our family, to myself." He shrugged. "Sometimes I think we'd all be better off if I just ended it. No more worries all around."

Scott grew cold, his body trembling. "John no..." He said hoarsely. "Don't say that."

John looked up at his brother, an unreadable expression in his eyes. "I feel like I have no choice Scott. That it's the only way to make him stop."

_The hell with this!_ Scott gritted his teeth and gripped his brother by both shoulders, forcing John to look up at him. "You listen to me John Glen Tracy. Stop talking that way! You are **NOT** a liability and you are **NOT** crazy! Dammit John! It's been awful not having you around, what kind of whole would you leave in this family if you killed yourself?" Scott's grey eyes bored into John's blue ones. "I thought you were smarter than that John. Or at least, not so selfish."

John face turned red with shame he tried to look away. Scott grabbed his chin and forced him to look back. "So I don't want to hear anymore of that kind of talk, do you hear me?" Scott growled, his tone broking no argument.

John's eyes filled with tears. "I won't...I'm sorry Scott...I'm so sorry..."

"Promise me!"

"I promise! I won't do it!" Tears began leaking out of his eyes. "God Scott..."

Scott pulled John close, wincing in pain, but ignoring it. He ran his good hand through John's hair. "I don't know what I'd do without you bro." He said hoarsely.

"You won't..." John's voice was muffled against Scott's chest. "I'm sorry..."

Scott pushed him back and stared deep into his eyes. "I'm going to hold you to that promise John." He said firmly.

John nodded and pulled away, wiping at his tears with the hem of his shirt. "I don't know what got into me Scott." He said quietly a few minutes later. "I know I've been acting like an ass but..." He looked up with haunted eyes. "I'm glad you're here..." He whispered.

Scott eased himself back down on the bed. "I am too bro." He winced again. "Must be just about time for my meds."

John frowned. "How does it feel today?"

Scott shrugged. "OK, all things considered. Rosie says if I make it through the rehab, I can go home sometime next week."

John sat down next to his brother. "You OK with that? The rehab?"

Scott nodded. "I have to be. I want my life back John."

"I know the feeling."

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Scott spoke up. "So, tell me about you and Christa."

John shrugged. "What's to tell?"

"John."

"I've never felt this way about anyone Scott. She's amazing."

"And she's good in bed too huh?"

John blushed to his hair. "You'll never know."

Scott chuckled at the expression on his brother's face. "As long as you're happy pal."

"I'm trying to be. She helps." John said simply. Then he sighed and stretched. "I'm going to head out and snag a nap. Didn't get much sleep last night."

"Yeah, I noticed you looked like shit." Scott grinned.

"Stay away from the mirrors there yourself Sleeping Ugly." John clasped his brother's hand warmly. "Thanks Scott."

Scott smiled. "Anytime Johnny. Get some rest."

"You too." With one last wave, John left.

Scott's smile faded and he dropped his head in his hands. _Dammit that was too close! Hood has really done a number on him._ He laid his head back and stared up at the ceiling, sighing. _I just hope it's not too late._


	30. Chapter 30

Sorry for the delay, real life getting in the way again. Thanks to all who read and/or reviewed!

Again, I don't own these characters, just the ones I made up. Please do not use without permission.

* * *

Jeff watched his son out of the corner of his eye as they drove towards the hospital. Something had happened since that morning they had talked in the kitchen. While John seemed more open, laughing and chatting with everyone, Jeff could see that it was a mask. John had withdrawn even more into himself. He was constantly jumpy, muttering to himself, and checked the answering machine the second he walked in the door. Jeff asked him about it a few times, but John merely brushed him off, saying it was nothing._ I thought that after the other night, things would be better. Maybe Scott can get through to him. If I can get Scott to talk to anyone at this point. Rosie told me yesterday that things could start to get ugly._

"Hello? Earth to Dad?"

Jeff snapped out of his reverie. "What?"

John laughed. "I've been talking to you for the past two minutes! Where were you?"

"Just thinking about your brother. It's been two days since he's had meds." Jeff mused.

"Yeah. I did some research online. He's at rock bottom at this point. Today ought to be real interesting..."

Jeff glanced up at his son's tone. "Are you sure you want to go?"

John maneuvered his jeep into a parking space. "Sure, it's Scott. What's to be afraid of?"

Jeff chuckled. "You're right. C'mon, let's go."

Together they made their way inside. To their surprise, Christa met them when they stepped out of the elevator. "Hey, what are you doing up here?" John asked her.

Christa took a deep breath. "Scott."

John looked closely at her and saw her face was pale and her eyes were bright with tears. "What happened?" He asked hoarsely.

She shook her head. "It's not what you think." She led them both to a small waiting room. "They called me up a little while ago."

"Why? What happened?" Jeff demanded, echoing John.

"He started getting really angry. Apparently he didn't get the breakfast he ordered, and flew off the handle. The anger's normal at this stage, but when he wouldn't calm down, Rosie called me up thinking a familiar face would help."

Jeff got to his feet. "I'd better get in there." He hurried out the door.

John waited until his father had left, then turned back to Christa. "What did he say to you?" He growled.

Christa shook her head. "John it wasn't _him_. It's the—"

"What did he say?"

She looked down at her feet. "That I don't really care about you. I'm just after your..." Her voice trailed off.

John leapt to his feet, his blue eyes blazing in fury. "I'll kill him. I'll fucking kill him."

"John don't!" Christa grabbed his arm before he could get to the door. "Scott's looking for a target. Someone to blame for his condition, other than himself." She smiled up at him. "Besides, I'm not after your money. I only use you for your body." She pressed herself against him and pulled his lips down to hers.

John broke the kiss some moments later. "Where can we find a closet around here?" He asked, burying his face in her neck.

She laughed and deftly slipped out of his grip. "Later." She winked. "Want to go out for dinner tonight? Just the two of us? Nothing against your father, but I miss being alone with you."

"It's a deal." He pulled her close and kissed her again. "Hurry and finish your shift." He said, his voice thick.

Christa smiled. "Got you a bit churned up did I?" She held a hand up as he grabbed for her again. "Uh-ah. Wait until we get home." She placed a chaste kiss on his cheek. "Love you."

"I love you too." John smiled as he watched her walk out the door. Then he squared his shoulders and made his way to his brother's room. He paused at the door, hearing the yelling inside. He arched an eyebrow at a nurse.

"Good luck." She muttered as she continued by.

"Thanks." John opened the door and stepped into the battle zone.

Scott stood on one side of the room, his arm in a black sling and an angry glower on his face. Jeff stood on the opposite and John nearly laughed out loud at the nearly identical expression on his father.

Scott turned his icy glare on his brother. "Ah, here's the heir to the kingdom now."

John bit back the retort that sprang to his lips. "Good morning to you too Scotty."

"Don't 'Good morning' me. There's nothing good about it!" Scott snapped.

"Watch your tone." Jeff said warningly.

"Why Dad? You put me here! I'm in pain dammit and **you** made it so they won't give me anything!"

"I didn't put you here Scott, you asked for the treatment." Jeff responded calmly.

"Bullshit!" Scott angrily paced the room, then he turned and leveled his gaze on John. "This is your fault."

"Mine?" John folded his arms across his chest. "You got yourself hooked on pain meds and it's _my_ fault? This I have to hear."

"If you hadn't been such a wuss about going back to Five, none of this would have happened!" Scott pushed on before John could respond. "Gordon's right! You **are** a liability to us!"

John paled. "I—I—"

"Yes you! You're just too afraid to go back to your job and more afraid to tell our Nazi of a father your father how much you hate it!"

"Scott Carpenter Tracy!" Jeff started.

"Oh fuck you Dad. Like you really care. All you're concerned about is your precious International Rescue."

Jeff marched towards his son. "You can leave the organization any time you want if you're that unhappy. No one's making you stay."

"Oh like Johnny-boy here did?" Scott snorted. "Not that he does anything anyway. Hides away up on Five, afraid to get his hands dirty."

Color flooded back into John's face. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I thought you were the genius of the family?"

"I don't hide up on Five. I do my job."

Scott laughed. "Your job, right. You sit there in front of a computer screen while the rest of your brothers are out there risking their lives. When's the last time you participated in a real live rescue Johnny?"

"I've participated in plenty and you know it." John shot back.

"Helping man Mobile Control doesn't count."

"Why not, that's all you do!"

Jeff stepped in. "That's enough, both of you."

But neither son listened. "Don't you blame me because you were stupid enough to get yourself hooked on drugs!" John shouted.

"Hello pot? Kettle calling! Isn't about time you had another beer John?" Scott sneered. "Or are you going to blame it on the voices in your head again?"

John snarled. "Go to hell!"

"Ooooohhhhh! The Hood is messing with my mind! Woe is me!" Scott taunted.

John threw a punch, catching Scott across the jaw. Scott stumbled backwards and clenched his left fist, ready to retaliate.

"**ENOUGH!"** Silence descended. "You," Jeff pointed to John. "Wait outside." When John didn't respond, Jeff gave him a glare. "John, I said outside." With one last scowl at his brother, John turned on his heel and marched out the door.

Jeff turned to Scott. "Your behavior was totally uncalled for. We are trying to help you. If you don't want that help, fine. But you will not act this way towards your brother and I, is that clear?"

"As a crystal." Scott replied sullenly.

"I'll be back later. I can't say the same for your brother. Get some rest." Jeff turned and left.

Out in the hallway, Jeff leaned against the wall, his head in his hands.

"Jeff?" He looked up to see Rosie frowning at him. "Everything all right?"

Jeff shook his head. "Not really. Scott doesn't seem to be taking this well."

She placed a comforting hand on his arm. "It's the addiction talking, not him. If Scott runs true to course, he just gave you all the reasons he has this problem and none of them are his fault, am I correct?" Jeff nodded. "That's normal. Another two or three days and he should be back to the Scott you knew."

"He says he's in pain." Jeff said softly.

Rosie nodded. "He is. But we are giving him meds, just not the amount his body is craving. We're taking good care of him Jeff. I promise you that."

He smiled at her. "I know you are. It's just hard seeing him like that."

"I know. Why don't you go get some lunch. Come back later, give you both a chance to calm down."

"Good idea. Thanks Rosie."

"None needed Jeff."

He watched her walk off, then went in search of his second son.

* * *

John tore out of the hospital parking lot, narrowly missing a city bus. He squealed onto Storrow Drive, heading towards the airport. A short time later, he was parked along the fence, and sitting on the hood of his jeep, watched as the planes landed and took off.

_I could do that. Just take the jet and take off. Go somewhere where they couldn't find me._ He sighed. _But I can't...I **won't** do that to Christa. I love her too much. My family on the other hand..._

"This just sucks." John said out loud to himself. He rested his head on his knees.

"_I hate to say 'I told you so.'"_

"Not really in the mood here pal."

"_I'm sorry John."_

"Sorry? For what?"

"_I know what you are going through."_

John snorted. "Yeah, right."

"_You see, I too know what it is like to be alienated by my family."_

John's head snapped up, but Hood went on. _"They don't understand you, your wants, your desires. Sometimes, they seem almost...afraid of you. There is no one you can talk to, you feel all alone."_

"I used to be able to talk to Scott. And my father." John said softly, a faraway look in his eyes.

"_As I did with Kyrano. But then, things...changed."_

"What happened between you and Kyrano. He never speaks of you. We didn't even know you existed."

"_We share the same mother, though I am older by a handful of years. My father left when I was a child, I have no memories of him. My mother remarried and had my brother a year later. We were very close when we were young, as close as you and Scott. I was left the diamond mine upon my true father's death, and set out to make my fortune. I invited Kyrano and his young wife to join me."_

"So then what happened?" John asked after Hood had been quiet too long.

"_Things were happy for a while. I found a large untapped vein and soon knew I would never have to want for anything again. I, of course, shared all I had with my brother. Then, it happened."_

"You mean your ignoring the safety protocols and causing the deaths of nearly 150 people? Forgive me for not feeling sorry for you."

"_I did not know it at the time, but the man I had hired as my foreman was stealing from me. He did not implement the supports I had paid for. Instead he used inferior materials that ultimately caused the disaster. But before that, Kyrano and I had had a falling out. He did not believe in the way I was running the mine."_

"The slave labor?"

"_It was not slave labor. I merely encouraged the locals that working for myself would be in their best interests."_

"I'll bet you did."

"_Not in the way that you think John. I merely tried to get them to see that technology was the way of the future. Why use a shovel when a machine could do the same job, better and faster. It was difficult to fight against generations of conformity. My people are set in the traditional ways, while they do not abhor change, they do take their time accepting it. So I was met with much resistance. Then when the mine collapsed...well they were proved correct."_

"Let's assume this sob-story is true. Why'd you come after us then? Why are you tormenting me?"

"_You know of my powers..."_

"Yeah, had a taste of them quite a few times." John said sarcastically.

"_Temper, temper John."_ Hood paused a moment. _"Even now, I am not sure entirely how they work. Sometimes...I feel like there are voices...in my head. Telling me what to do, how to act. I...lose control of my actions, even my thoughts are not my own."_

John felt a chill run through him despite the hot sun. "Go on."

"_It is like someone taking over. There are large spans of time that I have no recollection of. Take the attack on your family for instance."_

"You do _not_ expect me to believe that you had no idea what you were doing?" John snorted. "How stupid do you think I am."

"_On the contrary, I was perfectly aware of what I was doing. Whatever it is that possesses me, let me watch the entire event. It was as if I was a bystander in my own mind."_

"And kidnapping Alan? Torturing my family down in that God-forsaken mine? Then too?"

"_In a manner of speaking, yes. Only this time I felt pushed into doing that. I regret the entire incident and wish it had never happened."_

"And what about what you're still doing to me?"

"_It was not **me** John! This power is overwhelming! You have no idea what it is like to have something inside you that you cannot control or reason with."_

John grew very still. "Maybe I do." He said quietly.

"_I want my life to go back to the way it was. I miss my family though I doubt they feel the same about me."_

John's thoughts went to Gordon, then to Scott's last words. "Yeah..."

"_But I did not mean to burden you with my problems. I only wished you to know you are not alone."_

John's mind went still and he knew Hood had left. He leaned back against the windshield, his thoughts troubled._ I don't want to believe him! But what he says...it makes sense. And what Scott said today, I know part of it was the drugs, but the other part, about me not doing my share, does **everyone** feel that way?_

He sighed. _And Christa says she loves me, but how much of that is out of pity? We haven't had what I'd call a 'normal' relationship._ He shook his head. "No, she loves me, the hell with what Scott thinks." He glanced down at his watch. "And if I hurry, I should be able to pick her up and we can do that dinner."

John quickly slid off the jeep and starting it up, drove back into the city.


	31. Chapter 31

As usual, I only own the characters I made up, please don't use them without my permission. Thanks!

* * *

Scott looked up as his father pulled up in front of the brownstone. "You sure he'll let me in?"

"He let me borrow his jeep to pick you up. That's something." Jeff smiled. "Relax Scott. John is fine."

"Sure he is." Scott muttered. It had been over a week since Scott had blown up at his brother. John hadn't been back to visit, claiming he was busy, but Scott knew better. _Hope I haven't screwed things up even more._ He sighed and waited until his father walked around the jeep and opened the door. He winced as he got out of the jeep, then slowly walked up the steps.

"Dead man walking." Jeff teased.

Scott merely glanced back and glared. "Shut up Dad."

Jeff laughed, but his smile faded as the door opened they saw John standing there, his arms folded across his chest, and an icy look in his blue eyes.

Scott gulped. "H-Hi John."

John nodded. "Scott." He said coldly. They stood there, staring for a long, uncomfortable moment, until John broke into a grin. "You going to stand out there all day, or are you coming in?"

Scott breathed a sigh of relief and they all went into the house. John gave his brother a careful hug. "How you feeling bro?"

"Better now that I'm out of the klink." He returned John's hug. "Scared me John-boy."

"Told you he was fine." Jeff said as he walked by them. "Where's Christa?"

"Upstairs in the shower." John replied, following his father into the kitchen.

"Then why is _your_ hair wet, brother-mine?" Scott ruffled John's hair affectionately as John blushed red.

Jeff put his hands over his ears. "I'm not listening, I'm not listening!"

Christa walked in at that moment. "Not listening to what?"

Scott grinned. "Dad doesn't like knowing we have a sex life."

"You and who? From what I've heard John's the only one of you that has one right now. Unless you count Mr. T himself here. Penny someone, wasn't it John?" Christa breezed past them, totally missing the shell-shocked look on all their faces.

They were saved from further embarrassment, but the ringing of the phone. "I'll get it!" John bolted from the room.

"Why does he keep doing that?" Jeff asked.

Christa shook her head. "I have no idea, but it's starting to drive me a bit nuts."

Scott frowned in puzzlement. "What's going on?"

Jeff sighed. "John's been jumping at the phone for the last two weeks. He won't answer any questions about it, says he's just waiting for a call."

Scott shook his head. "Weird."

John walked back into the room, muttering to himself.

"Son? That the phone call you've been waiting for?" Jeff asked.

"Huh? Oh, no, no it wasn't." John sighed. "Look gang, I've got some work to do, I'll be up on the roof." He gave Christa a quick peck on the cheek and wandered out the door.

"Weird." Scott said again, shaking his head. "Want me to try and talk to him?"

"No!" Both Jeff and Christa said at the same time. Jeff sighed. "Don't Scott, he's just starting to open up again, and after what happened at the hospital last week..." Scott blushed and looked away. Jeff continued. "I think you should just leave it be."

Christa nodded. "I agree."

Scott looked towards where John had walked away, then grinned. "Well, at least we don't have to put up with his cooking tonight."

* * *

John stood leaning on the balcony, and watched the sun glinting off the Hancock Building. He sipped at the beer in his hand and sighed. _I should have heard something by now, good or bad. It's been ten months and the announcement is always made this time of year._ He sighed and took another pull from his bottle. _Just wish I'd hear something..._

* * *

Virgil sighed as he read the latest report on Thunderbird 5. He and Gordon had brought Brains and Fermat up two days ago, and the scientist had just faxed him the current information. He skimmed over the report and sighed. _Well, looks like things are working fine up there. We can go back to our normal rotation as soon as Scott and Dad get back. Or as normal as things can be without John. _

He had spoken to his father earlier in the day. Scott had been out of the hospital nearly a week and Jeff was making plans to go to London to be with Penny during the Hood's arraignment. _I just wish things would just go back to the way they were._

Virgil glanced up at the mural on the wall of his father's office. His eyes rested on each of his brothers in turn, then he sighed again. "_Que sera, sera. _What will be, will be." He flipped on the computer and glanced through the headlines. Skimming through them he froze. "What the..." He back-tracked and stared at the screen, reading the article in its entirety. "Holy shit!" Virgil bolted to his feet flew out the door towards the lounge. "Gordon! Alan! Turn on the TV! You're not going to believe this!"

* * *

John dozed on the couch, the book in his hand resting on his chest. Christa sat at the other end, watching him and smiling to herself.

Scott walked in and shook his head. "He used to do that all the time as a kid. Any idea how many nights I took a book out of his hands?" He smiled fondly at the memory.

At that moment, the phone next to the couch rang. John's eyes snapped open as he jumped up and grabbed it. "Hello?...Yes, this is he...What?...No...Are you kidding me?...No fucking way! Sorry sir...When?...Yes, yes, I'll be there...Thanks!...We will!" John stared down at the phone in his hands.

"John? Who was it?" Scott asked.

John looked up, a dazed look on his face. Suddenly his face lost all color and his knees buckled as he fell back onto the couch.

"John!" Christa was at his side in an instant, taking the phone from his hands and hanging it up, then checking his pulse. "John, what's wrong? Is it a headache again?"

John merely looked up at her, his mouth opening, but no words coming out. Christa looked up at Scott. "Get your father. Now."

Scott nodded and bolted from the room, hollering for Jeff as he left.

"Honey, you're scaring me. Say something." Christa pleaded to John.

Moments later, Jeff and Scott came rushing in. "What happened?" Jeff demanded, kneeling at his son's side.

Christa shook her head. "I'm not sure. He got a phone call then this."

Jeff frowned. "John, answer me."

John blinked a few times then shook his head. "Dad...Christa..."

"Who was on the phone son?"

"My—my professor, from MIT. He...he said..." John stammered.

Scott placed his good hand on his brother's shoulder. "Easy John-boy. What's wrong?"

"Nothing." To their surprise, John broke into a grin, his blue eyes filling with tears. "Nothing's wrong. I won." He said hoarsely.

"Won what?" Christa asked, her face a mask of confusion.

Instead of answering, he got to his feet, lifting Christa in his arms and twirling her around the room. "I won!"

Jeff shot Scott a look of concern. Scott shrugged, just as baffled as everyone else in the room. "John, what did you win?" Jeff asked.

John put Christa down and grabbed Scott next, placing a smacking kiss on his brother's cheek. He then moved to Jeff and did the same. "Get dressed all of you, we're going to The Season's for dinner."

Christa shook her head. "We'll never get reservations there. Not tonight anyway." She frowned. "Are you sure you're alright?"

John merely grinned. "Honey, I've never been better! And when they find out that the new Nobel Prize winner in Physics wants to dine there, bet they'll manage to find us a table."

They all stared at him in stunned silence. The phone rang again and John picked it up. "Hello...Virgil!...Yeah I just got the call!...Thanks!...It's already on the news?" John quickly turned on the television. "No they're right here." He eyed his father and brother with a wide grin. "They're still a bit shell shocked at the moment." John laughed. "Thanks Virg...I'll call you later...Yes, Alan I'll fill you in soon, let me tell Dad first...Bye." He hung up and turned back to his family.

Jeff finally found his voice. "John, what's this about a Nobel Prize?"

John beamed. "I won. Wait here." He rushed from the room, and they could hear him pounding up the stairs.

"Dad? Did you know anything about this?" Scott asked.

Jeff shook his head. "I'm as much in the dark as you are."

Christa merely sat down and started surfing through the channels, trying to find a news station. "This is crazy..."

John returned a moment later. "Here, read this." He thrust a folder into his father's hand.

Jeff opened it and began reading the contents. A few minutes later, he sat down on the couch and placed the folder on the coffee table. "My God...John!"

John grinned. "I called it the Tracy Quasar. It's mine...ours."

"A quasar, I don't understand..." Jeff shook his head.

John sighed. "A quasar is s class of celestial—"

Jeff interrupted him. "I know what a quasar is John. What I don't understand is how you found it."

"And how that snowballed into a Nobel Prize!" Scott added, joining his father on the couch and leafing through the folder.

Christa continued surfing through the TV channels. "Yeah honey, tell us!"

"Well, I first found it while I was on...at work." He glanced from Christa to his father. "Then I confirmed it when I was earthsi—back in the states."

Scott frowned, then he looked up. "Your trips to Hawaii and California!"

John nodded. "Went to the two observatories in Hawaii and Spitzer at Caltech, then finished up at Kitt Peak in Tucson." John grinned. "Sent my data to Andrew Patterson, my old professor at MIT, for verification. He's the one who submitted me. Apparently he's on the committee. I didn't know until a few months ago."

Jeff shook his head. "Why didn't you tell us John?"

"I don't know. I guess in all the excitement, I forgot to mention it."

Christa interrupted them. "Shh! Here it is!"

"_The Swedish Academy of Sciences in Stockholm announced the winner of the Nobel Prize in Physics today. John G. Tracy of the United States was awarded the honor for his discovery of the Tracy Quasar system. Mr. Tracy holds degrees in math, astronomy and physics, and was a former astronaut with NASA. The official ceremony and presentation of the Prize, will take place on December 10th in Stockholm."_

"Told you." John's grin spread from ear to ear. "Now get dressed! I thought I said we were going out!"

Christa jumped up into his arms, tears pouring down her cheeks. "I'm so proud of you!" She pulled his head down and kissed him full on the mouth.

"Ahem." Scott grinned as John looked up blushing. "Want us to leave you two alone?"

"Not now, but definitely later." She placed another kiss on John's lips. "I'll be ready in fifteen minutes." She hurried from the room.

Scott raised an eyebrow at his brother and smirked. "Hey John—"

"Shut up and go get ready Scott." John muttered, still blushing.

Scott laughed and followed Christa out of the room. A moment later they heard him call out. "Hey Lynch! Wanna help me out when you're done? Can't do the damn buttons on my shirt one handed!"

Jeff shook his head. "His shoulder isn't that bad anymore, and if it was, you or I could help him."

"Yeah, but why ask us when there's a pretty girl in the house?" John grinned. A moment later, his smile faded. "Dad, what do you really think?"

Jeff looked up and met his second son's eyes frankly. "What do I think?" He walked over and placed his hands on John's shoulders. "Nobel Prize not withstanding, your discovery is extraordinary. You found a whole new...galaxy! I am so unbelievably proud of you."

John's eyes were bright with tears. "Dad..."

"And you named it for us, not for you. John, how could I not be proud." Jeff pulled him close. "I love you son."

John buried his head against his father's chest. "I love you too Dad." He whispered hoarsely.

When Jeff pulled back a few minutes later, his cheeks were wet with tears. He laughed as he saw John wiping at his own cheeks. "Look at us. Pair of blubbering idiots."

John grinned. "Idiots? You maybe,** I** have a Nobel Prize." He said haughtily.

Jeff laughed. "Brat! C'mon, let's get dressed." He draped an arm across John's shoulders. "You know, that prize comes with a million dollars."

"Yeah, so? Worried I'll spend it all in once place?" John teased.

Jeff's brown eyes twinkled mischievously. "Nope, just reminding you who's paying for dinner."


	32. Chapter 32

OK, I forgot to dedicate that last chapter to my friend L. who wanted "HAPPY!" And thanks to her for her help with this part.

Don't own 'em just the ones I made up. Please don't use without my permission. Thanks! Enjoy!

* * *

John groaned as he rested his head against the shower wall, letting the hot water wash over him. "Why? Why did I drink so much champagne..." He muttered to himself.

When he emerged a half-hour later, he felt only marginally better. He swallowed a couple of aspirin and getting dressed, went downstairs. He found Christa sitting at the table with Scott, while his father was busy at the stove.

Jeff looked up. "Morning son. I'm making breakfast, how do you want your eggs?" He placed a plate in front of Scott.

John took one look at the eggs and bolted from the room. When he returned a few minutes later, his face had a decidedly green tinge to it.

Jeff frowned. "John, you alright?"

John laid his head on the table. "Oh yeah, just peachy." He mumbled.

Scott choked down a laugh. "Have a bit too much of the bubbly brother mine?"

John looked up and glared with bloodshot eyes. "Kiss my ass Scott." He put his head back down on the table.

"John." Jeff said sternly.

"Sorry Dad." John mumbled back.

"Thought you could hold your liquor better than that pal." Scott teased.

John merely groaned. "Scott, enough." Jeff said warningly.

Scott caught his father's glare and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry Dad. Sorry John."

John just groaned again and this time even Christa had to bit her lip against laughing. Jeff put a steaming cup of coffee in front of John. "Here son, I know you don't like it, but it'll help."

John looked up and eyed the mug critically. "Yeah?"

"Trust me son."

John took a tentative sip and shuddered. "How do you drink this on a regular basis?" He took another longer sip this time. "I feel like shit."

"Language John." Jeff said automatically. Scott grinned over at Christa. She just rolled her eyes and shook her head, again trying not to laugh.

John took another sip and grimaced. "I think I'm just going to go back to bed. I have a press conference at three over at MIT."

"Good luck with that." Scott said, taking a bit of his eggs.

John's stomach turned and he pushed away from the table. "God..."

"Oh John, Alan called. He really wants to talk to you." Jeff told him.

John pinched the bridge of his nose. "Please, not now. Just let me die in peace."

Christa chuckled and walked over to John. "C'mon honey, let's get you back to bed."

"Yeah _honey_, get some rest!" Scott called to John.

John glared, and after making sure his father wasn't looking, flipped his middle finger up at his brother. Scott blew John a kiss in return and shaking his head in defeat, John let Christa lead him from the room.

Once upstairs, John collapsed on the bed, pressing his hands against his eyes. "I think it would be easier to die at this point." He mumbled. Christa laughed and went about the room closing the shades. John peeked out at her. "What are you laughing at?"

"You." She sat down next to him and kissed him on the nose. "You overindulged last night, and it's funny."

John rolled over, the motion increasing the throbbing in his head. "It's not funny." He closed his eyes and sighed. "I've...overindulged before and never got _this_ hung over."

"It's the sugar in the champagne. And the carbonation. If you didn't drink enough non-alcoholic stuff, it'll get you every time."

John glared at her. "Thanks for telling me that now."

She laughed again. "You were having too good a time last night for me to spoil it. Besides, I haven't seen you that happy in a long time." She brushed through the hair on his forehead.

"Mmmm...nice..."

She placed a soft kiss on his forehead. "Take some more aspirin and a nap. I'll wake you in a couple of hours."

John's eyes snapped open and he sat up. "Owww...big mistake..." He clutched at his head, then looked up at her. "Wait a sec, what do you mean 'you'll wake me'? You're not working?"

Christa smiled. "My boyfriend just won the Nobel Prize. I think I can take a couple of days off to celebrate with him."

"Thanks babe." He lay back down, shutting his eyes again. "I love you Christa. You have no idea how much." The last came out a mumble as he drifted off to sleep.

Christa continued running her hands through his hair. "I love you too."

* * *

Gordon sat on the rocks and stared out at the horizon, occasionally skipping a stone across the water. The tide was coming in, and he knew he only had a few more minutes before he had to move or he'd be under water. _At this point, I don't even care._ Sighing, he threw another rock.

Alan made his way down the sand dune and plopped down next to his brother. "Hey, some news about John, huh?"

"Yup."

"I mean, we knew he was a genius and all, but a Nobel Prize! Holy shit!"

"Yup."

"And I thought all he did was monitor stuff up there. Guess I was wrong."

"Yup."

"Hope Dad let's us all go to Boston and see him. Wouldn't that be great?"

"Terrific."

Alan eyed his older brother and frowned. "Well, you're certainly talkative today."

"No one asked you to come here." Gordon snapped back.

"What crawled up your butt?" Alan asked, frowning.

"Nothing, just leave me alone." Gordon got up and marched off down the beach.

"What the heck was that all about?" Alan muttered to no one in particular.

"He's feeling guilty."

Alan jumped at the sound of Tin-Tin's voice. He turned and smiled as she emerged from the jungle underbrush. "Hey, what are you doing here?"

She sat down next to him. "I could...hear Gordon, and came to find him."

Alan raised an eyebrow. "You can read his mind too?"

She shook her head. "Not usually, he's just thinking loudly at the moment." They grinned at each other.

A wave broke over Alan's feet and he looked down. "Tide's coming in, we'd better move." He took her hand and they walked up to the top of the sand dune. "I'm really not ready to go back to the house." Alan said quietly.

"I'm not either." They sat down on the sand, and Alan wrapped his arms around Tin-Tin's shoulders, pulling her close.

They sat quietly for a few minutes. "So, what's this about Gords feeling guilty?"

Tin-Tin sighed. "I...I won't tell you. He's allowed to keep his thoughts to himself. I've blocked myself against him."

Alan leaned back and frowned. "What's the difference between him and John? You don't have a problem reading _his_ mind." He snapped.

Tin-Tin sat up, her coffee eyes flashing angrily. "That's different. Gordon isn't being possessed and hurt by a madman. And I never look in on John's private thoughts. Ever! That would make me no better than my uncle." She got to her feet. "And I think this conversation is finished." She started off towards the house.

Alan rolled his eyes and rushed after her. "Tin-Tin wait!" He grabbed her arm.

She pulled it free with a jab to his ribs. "Get your hands off me!"

"Oof!" Alan doubled over. "Please Tin-Tin! I'm sorry! I didn't mean it that way!" Alan walked over to her and stood a few feet away. "Tin-Tin?"

She stood still, her arms wrapped around herself. Tears ran silently down her cheeks.

"Aww Tin-Tin." Alan put an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. She resisted a moment, then leaned into his embrace.

"You don't know what it's like! To have this...power inside you! It never used to be like this, but since the Bank of London..." Her voice trailed off and she sobbed in Alan's arms.

Unsure of what to say, Alan held her close, rubbing her back soothingly. "Tin-Tin, I'm sorry." He said softly. She only held him tighter, as they stood there, watching the tide come in.

* * *

Gordon marched into the house, an angry scowl on his face. He threw himself down on the couch in the lounge and folded his arms across his chest, staring up at the ceiling.

Virgil looked up from where he was playing on the piano. "Hey Gords, what's up?"

"Nothing."

Virgil paused in his playing and glanced over at his younger brother. "Gordon?"

"Why can't you people just leave me alone!" Gordon exploded as he got to his feet and stalked outside to the balcony.

Virgil frowned and a moment later, followed Gordon outside. He found his brother at the far end of the balcony, overlooking the pool. Gordon was leaning on the railing, staring down at the water below.

"Not thinking of taking a dive are you?" Virgil teased, coming over to stand next to him.

"No." He snapped.

They stood quietly for a few minutes. Finally Virgil spoke up. "What's bothering you Gords?"

"Nothing's bothering me." He started to push past, but Virgil stepped back and blocked his way.

"No way bro, talk to me."

Gordon merely shook his head. "Drop it Virgil."

"Not until you tell me what's up."

To his surprise, Gordon's face crumpled. "I hate him Virg! I hate him! He should be _here_! With us!"

A light went on in Virgil's head. _Ah-ha..._ "Gordon, you don't hate him." He said softly.

"Yes, I do!"

Virgil sighed and placed his arm around Gordon's shoulders. "It's OK to feel that way Gordon. I miss John too."

"I don't miss him." Gordon protested, but Virgil could hear the emotion in his voice.

"Gordon..."

He clenched his eyes shut. "Dammit Virg, he won a Nobel Prize! They don't just _give_ those away!"

"No, they don't."

"And why didn't he tell us about this—this quasar he discovered! I mean, he didn't find it yesterday! How long has he known and he never said a word! I'll bet Dad or Scott didn't even know about it!"

Virgil nodded. "You're probably right. But Gordon, do you remember what John said, before he left? _Did_ any of us ever ask him what he does up there?"

Gordon's shoulders slumped. "No." He replied sullenly, then he sighed. "He still should have said something."

"Maybe he tried." Virgil held up a hand to stem off his brother's protest. "And no, I'm not taking his side. I'm trying to see things from John's point of view. And I'm feeling just as guilty as—"

"I'm not feeling guilty about anything! Least of all about John!" Gordon stormed past his brother and disappeared into the house.

Virgil felt in his pocket for a cigarette, and taking a long drag, leaned back against the balcony. "Sure you aren't bro. Sure you aren't."


	33. Chapter 33

Reposted this after I spotted a few errors that somehow got through. Thanks!

Again, I don't own the Thunderbirds...Woe is me.

* * *

John slammed the front door shut and leaned against it, rubbing the bridge of his nose. The phone rang, and he ignored it, instead pulling off his tie and tossing it on the small table in the hallway. _Damn paparazzi. Wish they'd leave me alone. _

"John?" Scott's voice came from upstairs.

"Yeah."

"Can you come up for a sec?"

John sighed. "Give me a minute." He went into the living room and poured himself a generous shot of whiskey. Slamming the alcohol in one swallow, he poured himself another one, then made his way upstairs.

"What's going on Scotty?" John asked, sipping at his drink.

Scott was sitting at the desk, peering intently at the screen. "The guys are out."

"What!" John hurried over to his brother's side. "Alone? What happened?"

"Power outage near LA." Scott answered without looking up.

"From the heat wave?"

Scott nodded. "Yeah. I guess a SE Edison worker was atop one of the towers, trying to fix a transformer when the whole thing blew. He's unconscious, or so they hope, and stuck up there."

John sat on the edge of the desk, peering at the computer screen. "Too windy for the locals?"

"Damn Santa Ana's are playing up. Helicopters can't get close and there're live wires flying all over the place. Virgil and Gordon are on their way in Thunderbird Two, Alan and Tin-Tin are manning base."

"Fermat and Brains back up on Five?" John asked quietly.

"Yep. They're relaying the co-ordinates and weather conditions down to Base and to Thunderbird 2." Scott finally looked up at his brother. Seeing the drink in his hand he frowned, "Bit early for that don't you think?"

John merely took another swallow. "Don't start with me Scott. This is the first one I've had in a while. Damn reporters are following me all over the place." He snapped.

Scott bit back a laugh. "That's what you get for being the youngest person to win a Nobel Prize bro."

"Yeah well, I'm about to give it back." He plopped himself down on the couch and finished his drink.

"Well, the boys seem to be doing fine so far. Dad get off alright?" Scott asked, changing the subject.

John nodded, trying to shake off his guilty feelings. "He should be landing in London..." He glanced down at his watch. "...In about an hour or so."

"Good. Hopefully we'll have this all wrapped up before he finds out."

John smiled. "_We?_ Thought you were still grounded pal."

Scott scowled up at his brother. "I can still direct them."

"Whatever you say Scotty." John grinned.

"Shut up John."

John laughed. "You can take the Thunderbird out of the man, but you can't take the man out of the Thunderbird."

Scott snarled. "If I weren't down an arm..."

"You'd what?" John taunted.

"You don't want to know Johnny boy."

"Oh yeah? Why no—" They both snapped to attention as both Virgil and Alan's voices came across the speakers.

* * *

"_Thunderbird 2 to Base."_

"_Base here, go ahead Two."_

Virgil glanced down at Thunderbird 2's instrument panel. "Our ETA is ten minutes."

"_FAB. Let me know when you reach the accident zone."_ Alan replied, his tone serious.

Virgil had to smile. "Kid's starting to sound more like Dad everyday."

"Could be worse, he could turn into Scott!" Gordon grinned.

"_I heard that."_ Scott's voice sounded unamused.

Virgil and Gordon both laughed. "You were meant to Scotty!" Gordon quipped.

"_How about you two knock off the antics and concentrate on the issue at hand."_ Scott's tone was firm.

Gordon crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue. Virgil choked back a laugh. "FAB Scott. Thunderbird Two out." He keyed the outside communications link to "OFF" and turned to his younger brother. "Man, he has it bad."

"How can he still drive us nuts when he's not even at the rescue!"

Virgil shrugged. "Remember how you felt when you broke your back? Same thing. Scotty's feeling pretty helpless right now."

Gordon sighed at the memories. "Yeah." Then he brightened. "Guess I'll just have to think of a way to cheer him up!"

Virgil rolled his eyes. "Great...we're doomed." A beeping started from Thunderbird 2's console and Virgil instantly snapped to attention. "We're approaching the accident zone. Keep a lookout."

"FAB." Gordon scanned the area, looking right and left out the massive windshield. "There!" He pointed.

Virgil arced the massive ship to the right and headed towards where his brother indicated. "Thunderbird 2 to Base. We have the victim in sight."

"_FAB Thunderbird 2. Watch the wind sheer."_ Alan replied.

Virgil bit back a retort. "Not a problem." He glanced over to see Gordon already out of his chair and hurrying out the door. "Use the rescue platform. Be careful."

"I will." With a jaunty wave, Gordon disappeared.

* * *

Scott and John had switched places. Scott was now pacing the room, and John was parked in front of the monitors, keeping track of his brother's progress.

"Gordon should be deploying the Rescue Platform by now." Scott muttered.

"_I'm deploying the Rescue Platform."_

John laughed. "Relax Scott, they're fine."

"Just wish I was there." Scott fumed.

John didn't reply but turned back to the screen. He glanced over at his empty glass, but quashed the urge to get up and get another. Scott settled down on the couch John had vacated, and idly rubbed his shoulder. John frowned. "You OK?"

Scott nodded. "Yeah, it's achy today. I must have done too much."

"Scott..."

"I'm fine."

"_Dammit Virgil! Can't you hold her any steadier!"_ Gordon's voice cut across the speaker.

"_I'm trying! She won't hold!"_ Virgil's voice held and edge of uncharacteristic panic to it.

"_Easy guys. It'll be OK."_ Alan tried to calm them both.

"_Yeah? Easy for you to say, you're not here!"_ Gordon shot back.

John glanced up at Scott, then quickly stepped aside so his brother could sit in front of the computer. "Stand down all of you." Silence. "Much better. Now Virgil, what's the problem?" Scott asked.

"_The winds are just enough that the Rescue Platform won't stay steady. The wires are jumping all over the place. One already hit the platform and shorted out the console."_ Virgil replied.

John and Scott both glanced up and frowned. John turned back to the computer, his fingers flying across the keyboard. "Brains, can you see what's wrong?"

"_It a-a-appears that the electricity some how sh-sh-corrupted the computer on the platform. Strange...I didn't th-th-think that was possible."_ Brains mused.

"Neither did I." John muttered as he continued to work.

Suddenly Gordon's voice cut in._ "I've got him! Virg, can you pull us up?"_

"_FAB Gordon."_

There were a few moments of terse silence. Scott tapped his fingers impatiently on the desk, while John continued typing. "Virgil? What's going on?"

"_Talk to me Thunderbird Two."_ Alan said at the same time.

John snickered, but didn't look up. Scott merely glared.

"_Cut the stereo you two." _Virgil snapped irritably.

"_J-J-John, what are you seeing on your end?"_ Brains asked.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. You?" John replied.

"_The same."_

"Damn." John muttered.

"John? What is it?" Scott asked.

John shook his head. "My guess is that the guidance processor has been damaged."

"How?"

"Electric surge."

"I thought we were protected against that sort of thing?"

"So did I." John scowled at the screen in front of him.

"_John? I th-th-belive it isn't the guidance processor. The problem appears to be just w-with the platform itself." _Brains told him.

"Hmm..."

"_Guys? Can we get a move on here? This guy needs medical help."_ Gordon cut in.

"We're working on it Gordon." John told him.

"_Well make it fast. You're not the one out here in static central."_

"I'm working as fast as I can. The computer here isn't as fast as I'm used to." John replied.

"_Yeah well, maybe if you were actually around to do your job, we wouldn't have this problem in the first place."_ Gordon snapped.

John froze, the blood draining from his face. "I-I..."

"_But no, let's keep babying our pet astronaut. Not that you ever did anything anyway."_

"Dammit Gordon! Keep your mouth shut!" Scott shouted at his younger brother.

"_Back off Gordon!"_ Alan said, again at the same time.

John pushed away from the desk and fled the room. Scott watched him go with concern, before turning back to the computer. "Nice going genius. You've just alienated your best chance of getting back up on Two."

Gordon didn't reply.

"_Hey, when we're done with all the drama, I think I got it working."_ Virgil said to them.

"_W-What did you d-d-do Virgil?"_ Brains asked.

"_Bypassed the platform's computer and pulled it up from here. We'll come up and get you when we get back so you can take a look at it first hand."_ Virgil replied.

"_FAB V-V-Virgil. Thunderbird Five out."_

Scott waited a moment then spoke. "Virgil, where is Gordon now?" His voice was cold and emotionless.

"_He's securing the victim. Where's John?"_

"He left. I have no idea where." Scott took a deep breath. "When you get back to the island, I want all of you in Dad's office. We're going to discuss this." His tone booked no argument.

There was a short pause. _"FAB Scott. Thunderbird Two out."_

Scott stared at the empty screen for a moment, then got up and went in search of John.

* * *

John leaned on the balcony railing, staring unseeing at the traffic below him. He took a long pull from the bottle at his side, and sighed.

"John?"

"What?"

Scott stepped out onto the terrace. "You OK?"

John took another swallow. "Oh yeah, just peachy."

Scott walked over and stood next to him. "Gordon's an ass. I'm having a word with him when they land."

"Don't bother." Another drink.

Scott shook his head. "He was way out of line. There's no—"

"Oh will you knock it off!" John exploded, startling his older brother. "What Gordon said is the truth. He's the only one in this whole family who's got balls enough to say it!"

Scott threw off his shock. "John, that's not true."

"Bullshit Scott!" John whirled on his brother, his blue eyes bright with anger. "You said the same thing at the hospital. That I was merely a glorified operator, afraid to get my hands dirty!"

Scott paled. "I didn't mean it John." He said quietly.

John snorted. "Yeah, right. Then why'd you say it then Scott? Huh?" He turned back to the street and took another drink. "Looks like Hood was right after all." He muttered.

Scott felt a chill go through him. "John, listen to me! It wasn't how I felt! I was lashing out, trying to hurt someone because I was hurting. You were just a target for my anger. I don't think you're somehow less than the rest of us. Dammit Johnny! You've got the most important job of us all!"

John merely ignored his brother. Scott went on. "Don't let the words of a madman turn you against us. We _need_ you John. In the organization. In the family."

"Whatever." John gazed down. "Terrific. Christa's here." He pulled back and started inside.

"Where are you going? We're not finished here." Scott called out.

"I am. Tell Christa I had to go out. I'll take the back way." Without another glance back, John left.

Scott watched his brother leave, his heart hammering heavily in his chest. The he turned and rested his head on the balcony.

He was still there a few minutes later when Christa came up. She was still dressed in bright pink scrubs. "Hi there! Any idea where...Scott? Are you alright?"

Scott looked up and pasted a smile on his face. "I'm fine. Just a little achy today."

Christa frowned. "Let me take a look." She gently probed his shoulder. "There doesn't seem to be any swelling. You may be overdoing it a bit. Relax tonight."

_Relax, yeah right._ Scott sighed. "Good idea. Let's just grab some take-out for dinner."

Christa smiled. "Anything to avoid John's cooking." Her indigo eyes twinkled mischievously, then she looked around. "Where is he anyway?"

"He ah...he had to go out. Nobel Prize stuff I think."

She frowned at him. "Don't lie to me Scott." Her gaze shifted to the nearly empty whiskey bottle on the railing. "What happened?"

Scott sat down and sighed. "He had a fight with one of our brothers."

"Gordon?" Scott's head snapped up in surprise. Christa shrugged and sat down across from him. "Your father mentioned that they had had a falling out. What was the fight about?"

Scott shook his head. "Just family...stuff. Ask John if you want all the gory details."

Christa narrowed her eyes. "Oh, I will." She smiled. "Now let's go call for dinner. I'm starving."

* * *

John walked along the edge of the Charles, along the Esplanade. It was late afternoon, and the place was swarming with tourists. He found a secluded spot near the Mass Ave bridge and lay down in the grass, closing his eyes.

"_John?"_

"What do you want?"

"_I merely wanted to express my congratulations."_

"Sure you do."

"_That is quite an accomplishment John, a quasar and a Nobel Prize."_

"Yeah well the million bucks isn't too bad either." John heard a faint chuckle in his mind and smiled. "So, what do you want?"

"_I...overheard what Gordon said to you. I am sorry."_

John's eyes snapped open. "What?"

"_He spoke rashly and hurt you. I would take that hurt away if I could."_

John frowned. "Since when are you being nice to me?"

"_Have I not apologized for my past actions? Have I not tried to help you? Remember your headache the other night?"_

John nodded. He'd come home from yet another press conference, his head pounding. He had fallen asleep before he had a chance to take something and when he awoke a few hours later, his headache was gone. "What about it?"

"_I eased your pain. Took it into myself so you could rest."_

John was silent for a few minutes. "What did you do that for?"

"_Because John, that is what friends do."_

John sat very, very still. He stared out at the scullers on the water. "Thank-you." He said softly.

"_You are most welcome. As I told you before, I wish to make amends for my past actions."_ There was a brief pause. _"Now if only I could mend things between you and your brother. I to know what it is like to be at odds with one you love."_

"Yeah, you told me." John plucked a blade of grass and chewed on the end of it, his thoughts in turmoil. "You're serious aren't you? You want us to...put this all behind us? To forgive and forget?"

"_Forgive yes, forget no. If we forget the bad things in our lives, it creates an unreasonable outlook on our future. We need the bad to appreciate the good."_

John smiled. "Yeah, you're related to Kyrano all right." He sighed and rested his head on his knees. "I'm just so confused..."

"_John, my friend, let me help you."_


	34. Chapter 34

Hello all! Thanks to Grumpy for her help with this chapter! It was a doozy.

Again, I don't own the TB's or its characters, just the ones I made up.

WARNING: This chapter contains adult situations and some violence. Younger readers take note.

It was nearly midnight when John got back to the brownstone. He walked unsteadily up the steps and went inside. He paused in the hallway, and waited for the room to stop spinning. _Guess I had more than I thought I did._ When the world had righted itself, he started forward towards the steps. The TV was on in the living room, and he automatically glanced in as he walked by.

What he saw shocked him sober.

Scott was lying on the couch, sleeping, Christa curled up in his arms, her head resting on his chest. Scott was shirtless and John couldn't see what Christa had on since they were both were covered by a blanket.

"What the hell is going on here?" John demanded loudly, startling them both awake.

"John?" Christa mumbled sleepily. "Are you just getting in?" The blanket slipped off her shoulder and he could see she was dressed in a pair of sweats and an old t-shirt of his.

"Obviously, I should have gotten in sooner." He replied coldly, folding his arms across his chest, and glaring pointedly at them both.

Scott sat up wincing and rubbing his shoulder. "Easy bro, this isn't what it looks like."

"_He's lying John."_

John frowned. "Oh no? Want to tell me what it is then?"

"We were watching a movie and fell asleep. That's it." Scott replied evenly.

"Without your shirt on?"

"My shoulder's bothering me. Christa rubbed the kinks out of it."

"_They're both lying."_

"Uh-huh. I'm sure she did."

Christa got to her feet and fearless let met John's icy glare. "Are you accusing us of something?" She asked, her tone as cold as his.

"I don't know. Should I be?" John retorted, his blue eyes bright with anger.

Christa shook her head. "You have got to be kidding me."

"I think I'll just let you two finish this. Later." Scott quickly fled the room.

John and Christa continued to glare at each other. "Well?" John asked finally.

"Well what?" She shot back.

"Why were you and my brother sleeping together?"

"_Sleeping together!_ Don't be such an ass John! We were watching a movie and I fell asleep! Scott must have dozed off shortly after me. We were waiting for **you** to get home!" Christa retorted hotly.

"And I'm supposed to believe that?"

"I don't care what you believe, that's what happened!" She frowned. "Where were you anyway?"

"_You are a grown man John. You do not need to answer to her."_

"I was out." John stated flatly.

"With who? What's her name?" Christa shot at him, her own eyes blazing in fury.

John narrowed his eyes at her. "I wasn't _with_ anyone."

Christa shrugged. "And I'm supposed to just believe you?"

John frowned. "I know what you're trying to do. OK, so nothing happened with you and Scott. Fine. End of discussion." He marched over to the liquor cabinet.

"I don't think so!" Christa hurried over and slammed the door of the cabinet shut before John could grab a bottle.

"Ouch! Hey! What do you think you're doing!" John shook his smarting fingers.

"You're not going to drink yourself out of this. How much have you had tonight?" She demanded.

"That's none of your damn business."

She folded her hands across her chest. "I guess I shouldn't worry about you then."

"_She doesn't really care John."_

"I guess not." John nudged her hand away, not gently, and grabbed a bottle of whiskey.

Christa shook her head as she watched him swallow the alcohol without bothering with a glass. "So, you had a fight with your brother, decided to get drunk because of it, and now you're taking it out on me?"

John looked over at her in surprise. "Who told you I had a fight with my brother?"

"_I'm sure you have been quite the topic of conversation over the past few months John. Here and on the island." _

"Scott did. He told me you and Gordon had an argument and you went out to cool your head." She glared pointedly at the bottle in his hand. "Plus your father mentioned that the two of you had had a falling out of some kind, and hadn't been on speaking terms for a while now."

John shook his head angrily. "Great, Hood was right. Everyone's been talking about me behind my back."

Christa frowned in puzzlement. "What?"

"Nothing." John took a long pull from his bottle. "You really want to know what happened between Gordon and me?"

"Yes, I would."

"Fine. Here it is then." He took another drink. "I took offense to something he said and tossed him off the second floor balcony of our house. There, satisfied?" Christa stared at him in stunned silence. "I thought that would shut you up." He settled himself down on the couch.

Christa finally found her voice. "You tossed your little brother off a balcony! My God John! He could have been killed!"

"No such luck." He took another drink and rolled his eyes at her expression. "There was a pool underneath."

"Still John! What if he had been hurt?"

John merely shrugged. "Like I said, no such luck."

She shook her head. "I don't believe you." She sighed in exasperation. "Are you going to tell me what the fight was about?"

"Nope."

Christa exploded. "Dammit John!" She paced the room, her hands on her hips. Finally she whirled and faced him. He stared blandly at her, and brought the bottle to his lips again. "Forget it! Just forget it!" She turned on her heel and marched out of the room.

John leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes. _Peace and quiet, at last._ His eyes snapped open when he heard the front door slam.

He bolted to her feet and rushed to the hallway. Christa was nowhere to be seen. "Dammit!" Movement outside the window caught his eye and he saw her hurrying down the steps. Muttering under his breath, he pulled the door open and ran out after her. "Christa! Wait!" He quickly caught up with her and grabbed her arm.

"Get your hands off of me!" She struggled to free herself, but John merely tightened his grip.

"Where do you think you're going? It's after one in the morning, and you're barely dressed!"

"I don't care! I'm not staying here with you!" She cried trying break out of his grip. John merely tightened his hold and held her by both shoulders.

"Christa stop! You're not going anywhere tonight! The T has stopped running by this time, what are you going to do, walk back through the Fens?" John sighed. "I'm sorry."

"I don't want your apologies! I'm sick and tired of your apologies!" She struggled out of his arms. "Just leave me alone!"

"_She doesn't really want you John."_

"Shut up!" John shouted.

"I won't shut up!" Christa yelled back.

John shook his head. "Not you! Dammit Christa, get in the house so we can finish this!"

"No! I told you I'm not going in there with you!" She broke free and started running down the sidewalk. John bolted after her and catching her in his arms, threw her over his shoulder. She thrashed around, trying to get free.

"Just calm down. We're going back to the house. If you want to leave that badly, you can call a cab." John told her.

"Put me down or I'll scream!"

"Go ahead." John marched up the steps and plopped her down in the hallway, shutting the door behind him.

She tried to push past him. "I'm not staying here!"

John stood firmly in front of the door. "And I told you how you could leave."

"Fine!" Christa turned on her heels and marched up the stairs.

"_You'd be better off without her John."_

"I'm starting to think that." John sighed. "Better go take care of this."

"_Let me help you."_

John paused. "Help me? How?"

"_Relax, let me into your mind..."_ John closed his eyes. _"That's it. Very good."_

John's eyes snapped open and he hurried up the steps. He found Christa in the office, about to reach for the phone. "Wait!"

She shook her head. "What now John? I can't do this anymore tonight!"

"Well, I'm not letting you leave until we're done here." John said firmly.

"Done? I am done John!" Christa whirled to face him, tears running down her face. "You've done nothing but lie to me since this whole relationship started!"

"I told you before! I can't tell you!" John said angrily.

"You keep saying that John! You offer me bits of your life, but pull back right before you actually tell me anything! I've learned more about you from your brother! I didn't know you graduated from high school at 16! And from MIT only three years later!" She took his hand in hers. "Why John? Why can't you talk to me?"

"_She has been talking to your brother? What else have then done besides talk I wonder..."_

John pulled his hand free. "What else has my dear brother told you?"

"See? This is exactly what I'm talking about!"

John shook his head and brought his hand to the bridge of his nose. "I...I don't..." He slumped into a chair and rested his head in his hands.

Christa waited a few moments, and then knelt down in front of him, taking his face in her hands. "I love you John. But I can't do this anymore. If this is going to work, you need to trust me."

John's eyes were filled with anguish. "Christa..." Suddenly his eyes changed, a red hue coming into them. He pulled free of her and got to his feet. "Why don't you ask my brother what he thinks. I'm sure he has plenty of advice on how to handle me."

Christa's face went pale, the red. "You son of a bitch. Forget the cab, I'm leaving." She hurried out the door.

John rushed after her, grabbing her arm halfway down the stairs. "Don't you run from me!"

"Get your hands off me!" Christa tried to break free.

"No! You're mine!" John's eyes glowed an angry red.

Christa backed away in fear. "John stop! You're scaring me!" She managed to break free and hurried down the steps.

"You won't get away that easily." John followed at her heels, seizing her arm a few steps from the bottom.

"Let me go!" Christa struggled in his grip.

John laughed, a dark eerie sound. "Fine." He let go of her arm and gave her a shove, sending her sprawling down the stairs to land in a heap on the floor.

Christa moaned and opened her eyes. John stood above her on the stairs, looking down with a maniacal gleam to his eyes. She brought her hand up to her lip, and wincing, wiped the blood from it. "I'm leaving." She said, her voice shaking. "Don't come after me, don't call me. I never want to see you again." She got unsteadily to her feet and limped out the door, slamming it shut behind her.

John slumped against the wall, his hands flying to his temples.

"John?"

He looked up to see Scott leaning over the railing. "Scott..."

"I heard shouting, what's going on?" Scott peered down at his brother. "Are you alright? Where's Christa?"

"_See John, it always comes back to her."_

The mask slipped back over John's face and he snarled up at his brother. "Stay away from her." He marched up the stairs making Scott back away. "Do you hear me, she's mine."

Scott held his hands in front of him in defense. "Sure John, whatever you say." With one last snarl, John marched down the stairs. A moment later Scott heard the door slam. "What the hell just happened?" He muttered to no one in particular. With a last shake of his head, he went back to his room.


	35. Chapter 35

Thanks again to all who've read and/or reviewed. Love you guys!

I wish I owned the Thunderbirds but alas...please do not use or post without my permission. Thanks!

Scott grimaced as made himself as comfortable as he could in the office desk chair. He pulled up the giant vid-screen and tapped a few commands into the computer. A moment later, the screen lit up and Virgil's face appeared.

"_Hey Scott, how're you feeling?"_ His younger brother asked.

"Better. Feels almost normal, except when I overdo." Scott replied.

"_Well then, don't overdo!"_

They both laughed. "Where's everybody else?" Scott asked.

Virgil shrugged. _"On their way. Had to have Brains go drag Gordon up here."_

"You had no problems picking him and Fermat up from Five?"

"_Nope. Took Alan with me."_

Scott's eyebrow's shot up. "You took Alan?"

Virgil nodded._ "With the mood Gordon is in, there was no way I was being stuck in a rocket with him for over four hours."_

"What's his problem this time?" Scott shifted in his chair.

"_John. Same as usual."_ Virgil paused and glanced behind him before turning back to the screen. _"You know, you didn't have to come down on him so hard yesterday. He was only saying what he thought."_

"Yeah well, it wasn't the time or the place."

"_Scott, what Gordon said...it's kind of true."_ Virgil said quietly.

"No it's not! Dammit Virgil!" Scott got up and paced the room. "So, if you're both blaming John for not being around, I guess you must be thinking the same about me huh?" Scott snapped, barely holding on to his temper.

"_What? No! Of course not!"_

Scott shrugged angrily. "Why not? I'm not there to do **my** job either."

"_That's different! You didn't just up and leave us!"_ Virgil shot back, his hazel eyes bright with anger.

"No, you all forced me away if I remember correctly." Scott paused as Virgil's face turned bright red. "Ever stop to think that John didn't have a choice either?" Scott asked quietly.

Virgil bowed his head. _"No."_

"There's alot more going on here Virg. Stuff that we haven't even touched the surface of yet."

Virgil ran his hand over his head and sighed. _"I'm sorry Scott. Just feeling overwhelmed at this point. With you three gone, it's up to me to hold this place together."_

Scott smiled. "You're doing fine Virg. Just lay off John. I think he'll come around if we just give him some time."

Virgil looked up._ "Yeah?"_

"Yeah." He replied, not meeting his brother's eyes.

"_Where is John? He's not coming to the debriefing?"_

Scott shook his head. "No, he had some meeting or something about his quasar." Scott hated to lie, and once again he avoided his younger brother's gaze.

Virgil didn't seem to notice as the others all came into the room. Scott watched the monitor and saw them all assemble around the lounge. Brains sat down near Virgil at the desk, Fermat hovering by his side. Gordon moved to the edge of the farthest couch, barely in sight of the camera, while Alan kept shooting him dirty looks. Alan himself was on the main couch, Tin-Tin next to him, their hands clasped. Scott raised an eyebrow at Virgil, who shrugged in reply. _I'll be finding more about this little development, that's for sure._ Scott sighed. "OK, let's get this started. Alan—" A second screen lit up.

"_Mind if I join in?"_ Jeff asked.

Scott quickly got over his startlement. "No Dad, not at all."

"_Good. Don't let me hold you up."_ Jeff sat back in his chair.

"OK, where was I...Alan, you start."

Alan quickly dropped Tin-Tin's hand. _"Brains called down and informed us of the situation in California. We all decided that it was something we could handle. All we needed were two men."_ He shrugged. _"I offered to man base so Virgil and Gordon could head to the accident zone in Thunderbird 2."_

Virgil spoke up. _"It wasn't a big deal. We've handled more with less. We got to the accident zone and found the victim easily enough. Trouble started when Gordon was lowering the Rescue Platform and one of the wires from the pole hit it and shorted out everything. Gords managed to get the victim aboard while Brains, John and I tried to figure out what was wrong."_

Jeff frowned. _"Brains, I thought we were protected against electric surge?"_

"_W-We are."_ The scientist shook his head. _"I don't k-k-know what happened. Virgil and I are still go-go-assessing the data."_

"_Let me know what you find out. Go on Virgil."_

Virgil took a deep breath. _"Anyway, John thought it might be the guidance processor, but it checked out fine."_

"_We're still running tests on it. There a-a-appears to be some corrosion." _Brains interjected.

"_So, then what happened?"_ Jeff asked.

Scott cut in. "In the middle of all this, Gordon decided to add a few choice comments to John." He leveled his steely gaze on his younger brother.

Gordon set his chin defiantly_. "I didn't say anything but the truth and you know it! If he's going to help, then he should be up on Five where he can actually **do** his job instead of hiding out in Boston pretending to be useful!" _

"You just can't keep your big mouth shut can you!" Scott shouted.

"_Ever hear of the word 'Denial' Scott!"_ Gordon hollered back.

"Fuck off Gordon!"

"**_ENOUGH, BOTH OF YOU!" _**Jeff's bellow brought instant silence. _"We are discussing a rescue. Not arguing about you and your brother's issues with each other. And you will both keep a civil tongue in your head is that understood?"_

"Fine." Scott said sullenly, leaning back in his chair. Gordon merely nodded.

"_Then continue. Alan?"_

Alan shot one last glance at Gordon before turning back to the screen. _"SE Edison was finally able to cut the power to the entire grid. The power outage affected the area from Los Angeles to the Mexican border, but once the winds died down, they were able to repair the lines."_

"_Lines plural?"_ Jeff asked.

Alan nodded. _"A bunch went down. There was only one victim, the guy we rescued. The local police and rescue personnel were able to handle the rest."_

"_Which is good since we were in no condition to do more being so short handed."_ Gordon snapped, folding his arms across his chest.

Scott bit his tongue. "Anything else we need to add Alan? Virgil?"

Virgil nodded thoughtfully as Alan shot a deadly glare at Gordon._ "No Dad, that's the gist of it."_

"_What happened to the victim?" _Jeff asked.

"_We dropped him off at UCLA Medical Center. Last I heard, he was going to make a full recovery."_ Virgil told him.

Jeff nodded thoughtfully. _"Good. Anyone have anything more to say? About the rescue."_ He added with a glare at Scott and Gordon.

"_I c-c-can send you the data on Thunderbird 2 as soon as I have it Mr-Mr-Jeff."_

"_Thank-you Brains."_

"_I think that about does it then Dad."_ Virgil said. _"How are things in London?"_

Jeff smiled. _"Things are fine here. Get some rest all of you, I'll check back later."_

"_FAB Dad."_

"_Bye Dad."_

"_Whatever..."_ The screen on the island went dark.

"I guess I'll see you later then Dad." Scott started to cut the connection.

"_Wait a minute Scott. I want to talk to you."_

Scott sighed wearily. "What is it?"

"_I read the transcripts of the rescue."_

"Then you know what Gordon said to John." He settled back in the chair.

"_Yes I do."_ Jeff frowned. _"Where is John?"_

"He went out. Interview stuff again I think." Scott hedged, fidgeting.

"_Scott, where is your brother?"_

"I...I'm not sure."

"_What do you mean you're not sure?"_

Scott rested his head back and rubbed his shoulder. "Something...happened the other night. John went out after the fight with Gordon and got drunk. He came home and caught Christa and I in...a compromising position. He kind of took it the wrong way."

"_Oh Scott, what did you do?"_

Scott glared at his father. "I didn't **do** anything! John wasn't here so Christa and I ordered take-out and put in a movie. My shoulder was bothering me, and she offered to massage the kinks out of it. Then we settled back into the movie and sort of...fell asleep."

"_Together? On the couch?"_ Scott nodded and Jeff shook his head wearily. _"Dammit Scott what were you thinking? You know how fragile John is right now!"_

Scott sat up quickly, hissing in pain. "Nothing happened Dad! We were watching a movie for God's sake!"

"_But you know how he would have taken it!" _Jeff sighed. _"Scott, was John drinking again?" _Scott looked away quickly and didn't answer. _"Scott Carpenter Tracy, answer my question."_ Scott took a deep breath and nodded. _"Damn...So you have no idea where he is?"_

Scott shook his head. "No. Can we track him?"

"_How? He has no communicator and we injected the locator chips in all of you after he left. I haven't had a chance to broach the subject to him."_

"Sorry, I forgot." Scott shifted in his chair again.

"_You know, Gordon wasn't that bad."_ Jeff said quietly a few moments later.

Scott's head snapped up. "You've got to be kidding me? You're on _his_ side?"

"_I'm not on anyone's side. Maybe it's time we let John know how we feel. He's hurting **us** just as much as he thinks we're hurting him."_

"I can't believe you're saying this! You want to drive him even further away? For Christ's sake Dad. The Hood is fucking with his head!"

"_Scott..."_

"Don't tell me you don't believe that?" Scott asked incredulously. "After all that's happened?"

Jeff sighed._ "I don't know what to believe. Part of me wants to, but another part wonders if this is all something brought on by the alcohol."_

Scott shook his head. "John was right, you don't care about him."

Jeff narrowed his eyes at his son. _"Watch what you say." _He sighed. _"Do you really believe that? That I don't care what happens to your brother."_

"No, I guess not." Scott replied sullenly.

"_Then drop it."_

"Yes Sir." Scott winced as he moved his shoulder again.

Jeff caught the movement and looked closely at his eldest son. _"Scott? You alright?"_

"I...I don't know."

"_Son?"_

"It's really bothering me." Scott clenched his eyes shut and lowered his head. "It's hard today Dad. I want to take something...I _need_ to take something..."

"_Scott no! Please son, you can get through this!"_ Jeff sounded almost frantic.

"Dad..."

"_Scott look at me. Look at me!"_ Scott looked up at his father. _"You're stronger than this. You don't need pills to get through the day."_

Scott shook a shuddering breath and straightened up. "You're right. I can do this."

"_That's my boy. Do you want me to come home?"_

He shook his head. "No thanks Dad. I'll be alright."

"_All right then. Call me if you need **anything**."_

"FAB Dad. Thanks." Scott waited until his father's image had faded before he got up and went downstairs. He wandered into the kitchen, trying to find something to get his mind off his shoulder. He paused to glance in the fridge, and finding nothing that interested him, closed the door in frustration. He went back upstairs, and went into the room he had claimed for his own. He sat down in a chair, and idly leafed through a book. After a few minutes of trying to read, he slammed the book shut. He got up, hissing in pain and went into the bathroom. _There must be some aspirin or something mild I can take. _He rummaged through his bathroom cupboard, then sighed and shut the door. He headed out, then paused at the stairs leading to the attic room.

Scott ran his good hand through his hair and taking a deep breath, went up. He walked into the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet. Knowing his brother's aversion to medicine, he had an easy time finding the bottle of painkillers.

With a shaking hand, he took the bottle and stared down at it.

"You gonna take those or just stare at them all day?"

Scott looked up in startlement to see John leaning against the door frame. "How long have you been there?"

John shrugged. "Long enough."

Scott looked back at the bottle. "I want them John."

"So take them."

Scott shook his head. "I can't!"

"Then why are you holding them in your hand." John marched over and took the bottle. He opened it and poured the pills into his brother's hand. "Well?"

Scott began to shake, some of the pills falling to the floor. "I can't!"

"Why not? You want them don't you? So swallow them! What's stopping you Scott?" John pushed.

"Because I can't! I won't do that to myself again! I won't!" Scott shouted, throwing the pills in the sink and leaning heavily on it, his chest heaving.

John smiled. "Good for you Scott. You did it." Scott looked up in confusion as John went on. "You faced it down and you beat it."

"Damn you Johnny. You scared me." Scott smiled softly up at his brother. "I thought you were pushing me."

"I was. Just not the way you thought." He walked out and lay down on his bed, one arm over his face.

Scott followed and sat down on his bed. "What's up John?"

"Nothing."

Scott rolled his eyes. _Like talking to a rock._ "John."

"Drop it Scott. I don't feel like talking."

Scott sat quietly for a few minutes. He knew his younger brother. It was just a matter of waiting him out.

Finally John got up and paced the room, coming to a stop near the window seat. "I lost the other night." He said quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"After Gordon...when I left, I don't remember any of it." John closed his eyes. _Well that's not entirely true, but he doesn't need to know that._

Scott made his way to his brother's side, and placed a hand on his shoulder. "You have to stop John. You're killing yourself."

"I know." John whispered. "But when I try...he's there. He's always there." John looked up, his blue eyes haunted.

"John..." Scott sighed and his father's words came back to him. "Are you sure you're not...imagining it? Alcohol can screw with your brain."

John stiffened. "You don't believe me."

"Of course I believe you."

John snorted. "Bullshit! None of you, Dad, Gordon, Christa, you, you all think I'm delusional don't you?"

"No I don't."

"What then? You think I'm making all this up?" Scott looked away quickly and John shook his head in disbelief. "You do think that. You think I'm doing this for attention. Poor John and his hallucinations."

"John we don't think that at all! We're just trying to help you!" Scott told him.

"Help me? That's rich. You all drove me away!" John shouted.

Scott's temper began to build. "No one drove you away and you know it. You left, plain and simple. Don't pin this on me because you fucked up."

"Go to hell. Some brother you turned out to be." John started towards the door, then paused. "You really want to help me Scott? Then just leave me alone." John marched out of the room, leaving Scott staring after him.

Scott waited a moment, then quickly hurried after his brother. He caught up with him on the second set of stairs and grabbed his arm. "Don't you walk out on me. We're finishing this."

John shrugged off his grip. "I am finished."

Scott gave John a shove against the wall. "Don't think for a minute that my only having one arm means I can't kick your ass."

"Go ahead and try." John snarled, shoving back.

Scott brought his good arm up and pinned John by the neck. "You really want to do this?" He stared deep into his brother's eyes.

"Don't make me hurt you Scott." John said, his voice oddly expressionless.

Scott shivered involuntarily. John's eyes had a cold dead look to them, and for a moment, Scott could have sworn they flashed red. He quickly stepped back, letting John go.

John glared a moment longer, then walked down into the living room, Scott following a short distance behind. John went straight to the liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle. He started to pour it into a glass, but nothing happened. He held the bottle up to the light. _What the hell? How can it be empty? I just bought this a few days ago._ Ignoring his brother, he grabbed another bottle at random. It too was empty. John quickly went through the cabinet, finding all of them empty, then turned to Scott, hatred flashing in his face. "You did this."

Scott folded his hands across his chest and nodded. "Yes, I did. No more booze John. Not on my watch."

"How dare you. Who do you think you are?" John hissed and advanced on his brother.

Scott stepped back, trying not to show fear. For all his bravado on the steps, he knew John could take him down in a heart beat. "What are you going to do John? Beat me up?" He taunted, watching his brother closely.

John froze, his face going pale. He shook his head and brought one hand to his temple. "No I can't! I won't hurt anyone! Not again..." Without another word, John pushed past Scott and fled out the door.

"John wait!" Scott hurried after him, watching his brother run down the sidewalk. He followed for a block, then slowed, his breath gasping as he held tightly to his injured shoulder. He watched as John hailed a cab and soon it disappeared from view. Shaking his head in defeat, Scott slowly made his way back to the brownstone.


	36. Chapter 36

Thanks to everyone who's let me be a sounding board! Tikatu, Grumpy, Convert, love you guys!

Again, don't own 'em so please don't sue.

---------------

John spied the envelope as soon as he walked into his bedroom. Recognizing Christa's handwriting, he frowned and opened it.

_John,_

_I love you. I know that seems like a strange way to start this, but it's true._

_And it's because I love you that I can't do this anymore. I can no longer sit back and watch as you destroy yourself. Which is what's going to happen if you continue down the path you're on. Your drinking has become a problem, if you haven't noticed that, others have. You are slowly drinking yourself into an early grave, and I can't stand to watch you do that._

_There is so much I still don't know about you John, and every time I try and reach out, you pull further and further away. I could understand about the secrecy surrounding your job, if that is indeed true. But my point is, I don't know if it is! There's so many things that you've told me that contradict the other that I don't know what to believe anymore._

_I'm sorry if it feels like I'm deserting you just when you need me the most, but I won't be part of a relationship where the other person isn't willing to try. I'm not strong enough._

_I'm sorry John. Good-bye._

_Christa_

John re-read the note three times before it sank in. The envelope still felt heavy and he turned it upside down. A small house key dropped to the bed. He stared at it a moment before hurrying to the closet and tearing it open. His worst fears were realized as he found only his clothes hanging there. Snarling, he slammed the door shut and marched down the stairs to the living room. He was reaching into the liquor cabinet before he remembered that Scott had dumped its contents two days ago.

Things had been tense around the brownstone the past few days. John and Scott were carefully avoiding each other, a task easier said than done. Scott, still recovering, rarely left the house except for physical therapy, forcing John to either hide upstairs, or spend the day away.

John paced angrily around the living room, finally turning on the TV, and throwing himself down on the couch. He stared moodily up at the ceiling, barely listening to the drone of the newscaster's voice.

Suddenly his head snapped around and he sat up quickly, staring at the screen. As he listened to the newscast, John began to shake uncontrollably.

"No...Oh God, please, no!"

-----------------------

"How's it feel?"

Scott was just finishing up his physical therapy session. "Not bad actually. A little stiff."

The therapist nodded. "That's normal. You're doing great. Keep this up and it looks like you'll regain almost full mobility."

Scott grinned hugely. "That's my goal."

She laughed at his infectious smile. "Mind if I turn on the weather? I'm supposed to go away for the weekend."

"Go ahead." Scott turned back to his weights and was in the middle of a set when something on the TV caught his attention. He spun quickly, dropping the weights with a crash, startling his therapist.

"Scott! What is it?"

Scott merely stared at the screen, color draining from his face. "Oh my God..."

---------------------

Kyrano was busy cooking in the kitchen on Tracy Island. He quickly sliced up the vegetables he had selected for dinner, and put them in the frying pan to cook. He hummed under his breath as he deftly tossed them in the pan.

A sudden crash of breaking glass caught his attention and he turned to see his wife staring at the vid-screen, a plate laying in pieces at her feet. "Onaha, _Isteri_, what is it?"

She could only stare in horror at the screen. Kyrano turned to look, and the frying pan slipped from his suddenly lifeless fingers.

Virgil heard the crash and looked over from where he was sitting across the patio. "Hey Kyrano, everything all right over there?"

"Master Virgil, come quickly." There was a strange edge to Kyrano's voice, and Virgil hurried over.

"What happened? What's wrong?" Virgil demanded.

Kyrano pointed and Virgil followed his gaze to the screen. "Did something...no..." Virgil's knee's buckled and Kyrano grabbed him by the arms to keep him from falling. He eased Virgil to the floor and Onaha knelt by his side.

"Deep breaths Master Virgil...deep breaths..." Kyrano met his wife's gaze with concern.

Virgil tore his gaze from the screen, his hazel eyes wide. "Alan, Gordon...I have to find them...let them know..." He took a shuddering breath.

Onaha placed a hand on his shoulder. "All will be well Virgil." She looked up at her husband. "I will stay with him. Go find our daughter and the others."

Kyrano nodded and without a backward glance, hurried into the villa.

---------------------

Jeff stood on the terrace at Foxley-Heath, and watched as Penny's Rolls Royce spun into the yard. He started down the stairs and was halfway to the bottom when Parker opened the door and Penny looked up at him. Even from this distance, he could see the murder in her blue eyes.

"Pen..." Jeff started.

"They let him go." Her voice dripped ice. "The bastards let him go."

"Come inside." He put his arm around her and led her into the mansion.

Parker suddenly appeared in front of them. "I shall make some tea Milady."

"Thank-you Parker." Penny paced the length of the sitting room. "What a complete and utter farce of a trial."

"What happened?" Jeff asked. "I mean, I saw the outcome on the vid, but how did it happen?"

Penny took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down. She smiled as Parker retuned with the tea tray. "Thank-you Parker. Please join us."

"Yes Milady." He handed her a cup and saucer, then sat down on the couch.

"Pen?" Jeff prompted.

She took a sip, then placed the cup down. "He manipulated them beautifully. If he wasn't such a bastard, he'd make us a good agent."

Parker jumped to his feet. "Milady!"

Penny held up her hand. "Calm yourself Parker. You know what I meant." She sighed. "Jeff, he's free. Trangh Belagant is free." Her voice shook.

Jeff walked over and took her in his arms. "He won't get you again Penny. I promise."

"As do I Milady." Parker said, coming to stand next to them.

"Tell me." Jeff said to her.

She sat down. "It started well enough. The barrister levied the charges against him and his defense started in." She got up and paced the room agitatedly. "They said Belagant's intentions were 'misunderstood.' That he never intended to rob the bank in the first place. He was under a coercion that made him do it."

Jeff snorted. "Coercion my ass. Then what?"

"The he did his...thing with his eyes and suddenly the High Judge and all the Council and jury were dropping the charges. Pronounced him innocent of the whole incident. Next thing I know, he's walking past me, all smug and leaving the building. I had Parker try and follow him but..."

"There was just too much traffic Mister Tracy." Parker shook his head, and cast his eyes down. "I'm sorry sir."

"Parker." The butler looked up at Jeff's tone. "I don't want you ever to apologize to me again, is that understood? It's not your fault that this manic walked away." Jeff paced the room. "I will ask you to do one thing though."

"What is it sir?"

Jeff turned, his brown eyes boring into Parker's. "Use whatever contacts you have with your former...partners. Find out where he's hiding. His two cronies are still in custody, he's going to need someplace to hide. All rats do."

Parker smiled. "I certainly will sir. In fact, if you'll both excuse me." He nodded to them both and quickly left the room.

Jeff then turned back to Penny. "What else aren't you telling me?"

Penny looked up at him. "I never could hide anything from you." She sighed. "He mentioned you." She said quietly.

Jeff nodded thoughtfully. "I figured he would. What did he say?"

"He told them all that you were there as well. When the judge asked why, he said you...you were the head of International Rescue."

Jeff felt his blood run cold. "Did they believe him?"

"At first yes." Penny smiled." But then I mentioned how could you be the head of IR when it was common knowledge you were here in London on business. How did the Thunderbirds pull off the rescue the other day if you were indeed, their leader?"

"That's why you let those reporters take our picture at dinner the other night." Jeff mused. "Nice work Penny."

"Do I get a raise?" Her blue eyes twinkled.

"I'll mention it at the next board meeting." Jeff walked over to the large windows and rested his head against the glass, sighing wearily.

"Jeff?"

"It's John. He and Scott had some sort of argument. John's back to drinking heavily again."

"Oh darling, I'm sorry."

Jeff sighed again, closing his eyes. "I just don't know what to do anymore Pen. Hood did it. He said he was going to destroy my family and he has."

Penelope took his chin and turned his face to her. "He can only destroy you if you let him. And the Jeff Tracy I know would never let that happen." She leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

"God Pen..." Jeff pulled her to him, holding her tightly.

She could feel him trembling in her arms. "It will be all right Jeff. I promise."


	37. Chapter 37

Thanks to Tikatu for sending me that plot bunny, and for her help with that pesky sentence.

Again, I don't own them, so please don't sue!

------------------------------------------

Alan had searched the beach and the house, before he finally came across Tin-Tin sitting on a hammock in the garden.

"Hey." He called out softly.

She looked up and smiled. "Hey."

He walked over and sat down next to her. "You OK?"

Tin-Tin nodded. "I think so." She looked up at him, her brown eyes dark with emotion. "Alan? Do you think he'll come here? Try again?"

Alan sighed. "I wish I could say no, but with Hood, there's no telling _what_ he'll do. I mean, who would have counted on him attacking Thunderbird 5 again." He shook his head. "Do you think he might go after John?" He asked quietly.

She nodded. "Yes."

"Terrific." Alan got up and paced. "Then we need to get to Boston! Warn him! Hell, drag John back _here_ if we have to!"

Tin-Tin got up and placed her hand on his arm. "That's not what I meant." She sighed. "I think he's going to do more of what he has been doing. Trying to influence John, convince him to turn against all of us."

"Then I still say we need John here." Alan stated firmly.

"And how would we get him here Alan? If we try, he'll only run again." She smiled. "He has Scott and he has Christa. Somehow, they'll have to manage to get through to him."

Alan's head dropped and he closed his eyes. "I hope you're right Tin-Tin." He said quietly. "I'm scared Tin, scared of what he might do now."

Tin-Tin slipped her hand in his. "I'm scared too."

Alan took her into his arms and placed a soft kiss on the top of her head. She snuggled in closer to him, and he tilted her head up, and lightly kissed her lips. She responded by pressing herself against him, leaning her head back to deepen the kiss, her tongue playing lightly with his.

Alan grew bolder, holding her tight with one hand, the other beginning to lightly move across her lower back. Still keeping her lips fastened to his, Tin-Tin also let her hands roam.

She let out a soft moan as Alan broke away, and began leaving trailing kisses down her neck. She trembled at the sensations flooding her body. Suddenly Alan pulled back and looked at her, his blue eyes wide. "Tin-Tin..." He said hoarsely. "I'm sorry." He quickly removed his hand from her backside.

She smiled. "It's OK Alan..."

He shook his head. "I don't want to hurt you Tin."

"You won't." She took his hand. "Why don't we head in and see what the others are doing."

Alan nodded. "Gordon's probably in the pool. And Fermat's down with Brains in the lab. And I'm sure Virgil is pounding something out on the piano."

"You're probably right."

They walked towards the villa, hand in hand.

----------------------------------------------------

"_**RING...RING...RING..."**_

Scott groaned and rolled over, grabbing the phone. "What?"

"_Scott, put on the news."_

"Virgil?"

"_Put on the news."_

Scott squinted at the clock. "Dammit Virgil, it's three in the morning."

"_Just put on the news!"_

"OK, OK! Give me a second here..." Scott grumbled, dropping the phone on his bed as he pulled on a pair of pants. He picked up the phone again and headed to the office.

"_Got it on yet?"_

"Will you knock it off? I'm not even awake here." Scott snapped.

"_You will be."_

Scott paused. "What's going on Virgil?"

"_Just put on the news."_

"Stop saying that." Scott sat down in the office and turned on the TV. "OK I'm here. What am I supposed to be looking at?"

"_Just wait."_

Scott's tone took on a hard edge. "Look Virgil, I'm not in the mood for riddles. What am I...Holy shit!"

"_Found it I see."_

"Shut up and let me listen." Scott keyed up the volume and stared at the screen, all sleepiness forgotten.

"_British authorities are perplexed today at the unexplained deaths of two inmates. Known only as 'Transom' and 'Mullion', both were accomplices of Trangh 'The Hood' Belagant, released from all charges earlier this week. _

_Transom was found dead in her high security cell, apparently of natural causes. Mullion was found at roughly the same time, again with no obvious sign of injury. There appears to be no indication of foul play. Autopsies are being carried out, and we will update you as we receive more information._

_Authorities are, at this time, trying to locate Belagant, who disappeared shortly after his release."_

Scott shut off the television and stared at the screen, his mind whirling.

"_Scott? Scott...you still there?"_

"Huh? Oh yeah Virg, just shocked." Scott shook his head. "What the hell do you suppose happened?"

"_Kyrano has a theory..."_ Virgil's voice trailed off.

Scott quickly switched to the video phone and stared hard at his brother. "What theory?" It was more of a demand than a question.

"_He thinks Hood did it."_ Virgil said quietly.

Scott frowned. "How?"

"_You know..." _Virgil made a waving motion with his hand and rolled his eyes. _"His mind voodoo thing."_

Scott sat back in his chair and bit back a smile. "Thought you didn't believe in all that Virg?"

Virgil cast his eyes downward. _"I..."_

"Yes?"

Virgil's head snapped up, his hazel eyes flashing. _"I was wrong, alright? If Hood is capable of this, maybe he **has** been influencing John."_

"Maybe?" Scott's tone was as sharp as glass.

"_Scott..."_

Scott stood and paced the room. "Have you heard from Dad?"

Virgil nodded. _"He called to tell me. I'm surprised you haven't heard from him."_

"Yeah well, he could probably figure out the time difference." Scott said sarcastically.

A red flush crept over Virgil's face. _"Sorry Scott."_

Scott smiled. "Don't worry about it." He sat back down and sighed. "So, now what?"

Virgil shook his head. _"I don't know. Dad'll probably call you later. Fill you and John in on all the details. I guess he and Penny are working on something."_ Virgil looked up. _"Make sure you fill John in before Dad calls."_

Scott quickly looked away. "Sure. No problem." He replied quickly. A little too quickly.

"_What's wrong?"_

"Nothing."

"_Scott, where's John?"_

"I...I'm not sure."

"_What do you mean 'you're not sure'? Did you lose him again!"_

"No I didn't **lose** him. He's a grown man Virgil. I'm not his keeper. Where he goes and what he does is his own business." He snapped.

"_Shit."_ Virgil pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and lit one. _"What happened?"_

Scott frowned. "Still smoking? Thought you were going to quit?"

"_Pot calling the kettle, Scott?"_ Virgil blew a stream of smoke and the two glared at each other. Then Virgil sighed. _"Look we should be working together. Fighting is us doing Hood's work for him."_

"You're right." Scott shook his head. "John's been gone for two days. He bugged out right after they made the announcement about Hood's release."

"_No..."_

"Oh, it gets better." Scott ran a hand through his dark hair. "He and Christa broke up."

"_WHAT!"_

Scott nodded. "I found part of a note she wrote him. Said something that she didn't want to watch him drink himself into an early grave."

Virgil shook his head. _"I can't believe this? I thought they were pretty serious."_

Scott shrugged. "So did John. Guess she couldn't handle it and dumped him."

"_Well, I suppose it's better to find out now then..."_ His head snapped up. _"Do you think John told her about..."_

Scott shook his head. "This is John we're talking about here. He doesn't talk to us, think he was any different with Christa?" He sighed. "I don't know Virg, maybe if he had said something, things would have worked out differently. I really thought she was the one for him. She would have been a terrific asset to the team, that's for sure."

"_Yeah."_ Virgil watched as Scott yawned. _"Go back to bed. I'll see if I can do any digging on my end, see if we can figure out where John is. I'll call you later."_

"FAB Virgil. Good night." Scott waited until his brother had disappeared, then got up and started back to his room.

"_**DING-DONG!"**_

Scott rolled his eyes. "Now what?" He marched down the stairs.

"_**DING-DONG!"**_

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming." He pulled the front door open. "Yes?"

A police officer stood on the step. "Sir? I'm detective Roger Connors. I'm sorry to bother you this late. Do you know this man?" He handed something to Scott.

Scott felt his blood grow cold as he stared down at the ID. "This is my brother...John." He said hoarsely.

The detective nodded. "That's what he said, we just wanted to verify it."

Scott's head snapped up. "He said? You know where he is?"

"Yes sir. We have him in the car." The man turned and waved.

Peering into the pre-dawn twilight, Scott could just make out the cruiser parked near the sidewalk. Two figures emerged from the car, and started up the steps. "John!"

Sure enough, John was stumbling up the steps. He reached the top and pushed by, not even glancing at his brother.

The police officers exchanged a glance. Scott caught it and frowned. "What's going on? Is he being charged with something?"

The officer shook his head. "Not at this time, no. Seems your brother picked a fight with some Yankees fans, down at a bar on Com Ave."

Scott closed his eyes and sighed. "John..."

The man went on. "Jerry and I convinced the owner not to press charges if John was to take care of the damages."

"The Yanks fans cut and run." The other officer added.

Scott nodded wearily. "I'll have our lawyer call first thing in the morning. Consider it taken care of." He held out his hand. "Thank-you."

The men each shook Scott's hand. "You're welcome sir. And I'd try to get your brother into some kind of program. He needs help."

_You can say that again, _Scott thought to himself. "I'll look into it." He waited until the cruiser had left, then went inside in search of his brother.

He found John in the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of water.

Scott watched as John moved around the kitchen, steadfastly ignoring his presence. Finally Scott could stand it no longer. "So John, where've you been for the past couple of days?"

John continued to ignore his brother, instead making himself a sandwich. He pushed past Scott again, and sat down at the table and calmly eating his meal.

Scott counted to ten. Then did it twice more before marching forward. He placed his left hand on John's shoulder and jerked him backwards, almost toppling the chair. "John, I asked you a question."

John glared, his blue eyes flashing fire. "What do you want to hear Scott? That I was out drinking myself senseless?"

"Were you?"

"Yeah, as a matter of fact I was." He arched an eyebrow up. "Happy now?"

"Is this because of Christa?"

John went pale. "How do you know that?"

Scott shrugged. "I found a piece of a note she wrote you. It was on the floor near the fireplace. What happened?"

"You read the note. She dumped me. End of story." John got up and placed his dishes in the sink. "I'm better off without her anyway." He mumbled sullenly.

"You sure about that?"

"Just drop it Scott. It's none of your business." John snapped.

"And I suppose the couple of grand needed to make bar repairs is none of my business either."

"That's right." John started to push by his brother.

Scott waited until John had reached the doorway before he spoke. "Transom and Mullion are dead."

John froze as Scott went on. "They were found dead in their cells this morning without a mark on them. I'll leave it up to your imagination as to how it happened."

John turned, his face deathly white. "No, you're lying. He wouldn't kill them. He said he wasn't going to hurt anyone anymore." He whispered.

Scott frowned. "What?"

"Nothing...nothing." John bolted from the room, and Scott could hear him pounding up the stairs to his room. A few moments later, he heard the bedroom door slam.

Sighing wearily, Scott realized there wasn't much more he could do until after he talked to his father. He shut off the kitchen light and went back to bed.

-----------------------------------------

Jeff rubbed his eyes tiredly as he stared at the video-screen. He didn't even want to know how Penny got the recordings of Hood's trial. As far as he knew, it had all been classified.

He'd run the video nearly a dozen times now, looking for anything that would prove Hood had used his influence on the court. So far he'd come up with nothing. He had already sent the film to Brains, and had considered sending it to John as well, before deciding that was a bad idea.

Jeff sighed and ran the video again, this time zooming in on Hood himself. _It's here, I know it is._

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John agitatedly paced the length of his room. _I can't believe this. Why would he kill them? Why?_ He threw himself down on the window seat, pulling his knees up and resting his hand on them. He then took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"Trangh." Nothing. "I know you're there. I want to talk to you."

"_Hello John. Come to congratulate me on my release?"_

John snorted. "You wish. Why did you kill them?"

"_Kill who John?"_

"Don't play games with me."

"_They were no longer useful to me."_ There was no touch of remorse in his tone.

"I guess I know where I'll end up then, huh?"

"_Now John, when have I ever given you the reason to think that?"_

"Let's see, how about whenever you give me that mind blast thing of yours."

John could almost hear him sigh. _"How many times must I apologize for that John?"_

"Until I believe you." John got up and paced the room again. "How am I supposed to convince the others that you're sorry when you pull something like this?"

"_You are right. I shall have to find a way to repair this."_

"You think?" John sighed. "Sorry, been a bit testy lately."

"_Yes, I know about Christa."_

John shrugged. "She's better off without me."

"_I do not think so John. I would say you are better off without her."_

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see."

"_And your words with Scott...I am sorry you are having trouble with another member of your family. Perhaps I should just leave you, let you sort things out by yourself."_

"No! No...don't go."

"_I do not wish to cause you further pain John."_

"Please, you're the only one who's actually listening to me at this point. I don't know what I would do if you left." He pleaded. "I need you!"

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Far away, hidden deep within the English countryside, the Hood smiled. "Very well John. I shall stay."


	38. Chapter 38

Thanks to everyone who's reading and/or reveiwing. Glad you're still enjoying it.

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"He's good, I'll give him that much." Jeff said to Penny as they sat down to dinner.

"Who is?" Penny asked.

"Hood. He made sure that he was in court when they found Transom and Mullion. There's no way to tie him with their deaths."

"They are issuing the autopsy results tomorrow. Cause of death is believed to have been from a massive stroke. Which, as we both know, is nonsense." Penny told him.

'He killed them. And he's going to kill John if we don't find some way to stop him." There was a slight quiver to Jeff's voice.

Penny looked up at him. Jeff was pushing the food around his plate, not eating anything. "Jeff? Darling, he won't get John. He has too many obstacles to get through, not the least being us." She walked over to him and made him look up at her. "John is strong. He'll handle Hood when the time comes, you'll see."

Jeff shook his head. "I don't think so Penny. Scott told me John and Christa broke up, and John came home drunk again, two days later. Actually, he was escorted home by the police after starting a bar fight."

"Oh Jeff, that's awful." She blue eyes narrowed in thought. "I think I may have to visit John and have a little chat with him."

Jeff smiled. "I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that one. But there's a hurricane building over the north Atlantic at the moment. I don't see us flying anywhere for the next week or so, at least until the weather guys get its path figured out."

"So, you'll be staying a bit longer then?" Penny asked casually.

Jeff looked up at the tone of her voice. "I don't have to stay here. I can get a room in London. In fact, that will probably be easier." He started to get up, but Penny placed a hand on his shoulder.

"I didn't say I wanted you to leave." She said quietly.

"Then what do you want Penny?" Jeff asked, his eyes dark.

"You." She replied simply.

"Pen..."

"Jeff, I never stopped loving you. Even when I hated you, I always loved you." She smiled softly. "I miss you Jeff. I miss the boys, the island, the way things used to be. And, now that we have consummated our relationship, I miss that too."

Jeff blushed red and stammered something she couldn't hear. "What was that dear?" She said coyly.

He got to his feet and walked across the room, running one hand through his hair. "I miss you too Pen." He looked over at her. "I was an idiot to walk out of here that night. I was only thinking of myself, something that I've been accused of quite alot lately." He smiled ruefully.

"Hindsight is always perfect." Penny told him.

Jeff chuckled. "You're absolutely right about that." He held out his hand. "C'mon, let's get more comfortable." He frowned at her grin. "Not _that_ comfortable."

"You can't blame a girl for trying." She teased, as she took his hand and together they made their way to the living room. Jeff started a fire in the fireplace, then poured them both a brandy and they settled down on the couch. "Now, tell me more about this hurricane."

Jeff took a sip of his brandy. "It's not actually a hurricane yet. But the potential is there for it to form. Thing is, there's another one building north of it and the patterns indicate it's going to merge with the other. Could cause alot of problems, so I had Brains stay planet side for now, just in case."

"You've worked out a schedule for Thunderbird Five then?"

"I think so. Brains has been training both Alan and Fermat. While neither of them are ready for a solo stint, both boys will be rotating with the person who's stationed at that time. It's probably going to be Scott, since he's grounded for the foreseeable future."

"You don't think John is coming back?"

Jeff shook his head. "No, I don't."

"He'll come around Jeff."

"No Pen, he won't." Jeff leaned forward and rubbed his eyes tiredly. "John was right in a way, I did...sometimes forget about him."

"Jeff, you didn't forget him!"

"Yes I did dammit! I stuck him up on Five and left him there!" Jeff got to his feet and marched over to the fireplace, staring down into the flames. "It was easy actually. He was always so quiet, sometimes I went days without talking to him." He sighed. "After Lucy died, I retreated into my own world. Scott was gone to the Academy, and John was left to pick up the pieces. He took charge and made sure the others got to school, had meals, clean clothes, everything. Hell Penny, I would find him asleep on the kitchen table most nights. Dozed off doing his homework. I never even realized he had dropped out of school to keep up with it all."

Penny frowned. "Dropped out? I thought he graduated a year early?"

Jeff nodded. "He did. _After_ I went to school and talked to his teachers. They agreed to let him work at home, at his own pace." Jeff smiled. "When he came home and told me he had been accepted into MIT...I've never been so proud. Not even two years later when he got into NASA. He's so damn smart Penny..."

"He takes after his father." Penny walked over and took Jeff's hand.

He smiled at her. "Thanks Pen." His eyes took on a faraway look. "I was so scared...no terrified, when his mayday came in. My worst nightmare, one of my sons had been killed. You have no idea how relieved I was to hear his voice when we got in range."

Jeff shuddered. "Hood could have killed him. It's a miracle he did live. Then the bastard tried again. And once again, I failed to save my sons."

"Jeff, you did save them. True, they came out a bit battered, John and Scott especially, but they're fine."

He shook his head. "I should have seen it, Penny. I should have seen that John wasn't ready to go back. But once again, I buried my head in the sand and pretended everything was alright. And look where that got me? I have five sons who are barely speaking to each other, let alone me; a madman who's on the loose, just waiting for a chance to get me or my sons; and last but not least, I screwed up my chance for happiness with you." He started towards the door. "Forget it. I'll just get a room in London."

"Marry me."

Jeff froze and turned. "What?"

"I said, marry me." Penelope walked over to him. "You do still love me, correct?"

"I—I—You—" Jeff stammered.

"It's a simple 'yes' or 'no' answer Jeff."

Jeff finally found his voice, and narrowed his eyes at her. "I thought you couldn't marry me? Your duties would get in the way." He said, his voice holding a touch of anger in it.

She met his gaze fearlessly. "I've had time to reconsider."

"Oh? What if I don't want to marry you anymore?" Jeff asked, a frown on his face.

Instead of answering, Penny merely pressed herself against him, molding her body to his. Her lips sought his, and he let out a soft moan as he crushed her against him. Finally, he pulled back, his brown eyes dark. "Penny..." He said hoarsely.

"Don't say anything Jeff. Unless it's yes." She pulled him back down to her. When they broke apart, Penny smiled coyly. "Well?"

Jeff grinned. "Yes." He swept her up in his arm. "Yes, yes, yes!" He swung her in a circle. "I love you Penelope." He said, kissing her lightly.

Penny's blue eyes were bright with tears. "I love you Jeff." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Now, why don't you take me to bed so we can celebrate this properly?"

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Scott paced the living room, glancing up at the clock for seemingly the hundredth time. _Midnight...again. Dammit John, where are you? _He sighed and plopped himself down on the couch, rubbing his temples. _I've been covering his ass for three days now. Dad's not going to be put off much longer._ He had just started to doze off when he heard the front door open.

Scott bolted to his feet. "John? Is that you?"

"Who'd you think it would be? The president?" John's voice sounded slurred.

Scott frowned as his brother walked, _staggered is more like it, _into the room. John's appearance was disheveled, and his eyes were bright and glassy. The stench of alcohol almost knocked Scott over. "Where have you been?" Scott demanded without preamble.

"That, brother mine, is none of your business." Then John smiled. "But since you asked so nicely, I'll tell you." He half sat, half fell onto the couch. "I found this terrific place down in..." John frowned. "You know, I'm not sure where it is actually...huh...Anyway, we should go, beer's cheap, women are aplenty. We'd have a great time."

Scott shook his head in disbelief. "I can't believe this...You've been gone for three days and now you stroll in like it's nothing _and_ you want me to go get drunk with you? Have you lost what's left of your mind?"

John's smile faded. "He told me you'd say that. Forget I asked." He got to his feet and started out the door.

Scott stepped in front of him, effectively blocking the way. "Who told you John? Who have you been talking to?"

"Like you care." The light had gone out of John's eyes and he glared sullenly at his brother. "None of you actually give a damn about me."

Scott rolled his eyes. "Are you going to start that old song and dance again? Grow up John, the universe doesn't revolve around you." He snapped.

"No, you'd much rather it revolved around **you**!" John shot back.

Scott refused to back down. "This little 'woe is me' crap is getting old John."

"Fuck you Scott." John snarled, trying to push his way past.

Scott stood his ground firmly. "No way. We're finishing this, one way or another."

"Finish what Scott! I think I've made myself perfectly clear! I don't want any of you any more!"

"That's not you talking John."

"Funny, I seem to be the only one standing here."

"Watch your tone. I'm just looking out for you and you know it."

"Bullshit! None of you care, you're just acting like it to make yourselves feel better!" John shouted.

Scott folded his arms across his chest. "Let me guess, now comes the 'we left you up there to die' part right?" He marched forward until he stood toe to toe with his brother. "Before you start that, let me tell you what it _is_ like to be left to die. When my jet was shot down, I was stuck in the middle of a desert, no food, no water, injured. And in the middle of enemy territory so I couldn't even signal for help. It took my squad over two days to find me and by then I was more dead than alive." His steel grey eyes bore into John's blue ones. "You think I wasn't afraid? You think I wanted to get back in that damn plane? We all have fears John, the best of us just get over them."

"And stop with the 'we don't love you crap' too. Because you know that's not true. If it was, we **would** have left you to die up there." Scott finished.

"_He's lying."_

John shook his head. "Stop. Just let me think."

"_They've all lied to you John. If your father really cared, would he, right now, be in Lady Penelope's arms instead of by your side? He came to see that Scott was tended to, but left you to flounder on your own. Again."_

John pressed his hands to his temples. "No...No..."

Scott frowned. "John?"

"_They have already found a way to replace you on Thunderbird 5. Alan and Fermat I believe. You are not needed anymore John."_

"I...They..." John whirled and headed for the liquor cabinet. Tearing the door open, he pulled out a bottle.

"Whiskey John? Getting drunk again is how you solve your problems?" Scott said, walking over.

"Leave me alone Scott." John growled, turning his back on his brother.

"No John, I won't. You've been left alone long enough." Scott placed his hand on John's shoulder.

"Leave me alone."

"No."

John whirled, his eyes flashing. "You don't get it do you Scott. He doesn't want you."

"He? John what...God no..." Scott paled, taking an involuntary step backwards as John's eyes turned red.

John laughed, an eerie, evil sound. "What's the matter Scott? Not afraid of your brother are you?"

Scott snarled. "I'll never fear my brother. John! Fight him!"

John responded by lashing out with a vicious backhand that sent Scott sprawling to the floor. "What about now, Scott?" John's voice was deeper, more intense and it sent a shudder through Scott. "Are you afraid yet?"

Scott pushed himself to his feet. "John, don't listen to him. You're smarter and stronger than he is!"

John winced, taking a step back and bringing his hands to his head. "Scott..."

"Fight him John!" Scott took hold of his brother's shoulders. "You're not alone John, you never will be!"

"I know, I...Arugh!" He brought his hands up to his head again. When he looked up, his eyes were full of anguish. "Scott please...help me..." He groaned again, dropping to his knees.

Scott knelt next to him. "Always bro, just don't give into him."

"I'm trying...He's...God..." John slumped forward, then sat up again a moment later. His ice blue eyes were once again tinted red. "Nice try Scott. He's mine now, and I don't intend to give him up."

"Bastard, leave him alone. Haven't you done enough?"

John/Hood laughed. "Scott my dear, you haven't seen anything yet." Before Scott could react, John leapt up and had his hands around his brother's throat. "Good bye, _brother_." He tightened his grip.

Scott desperately tried to pull John's hands off his throat. His vision began to dim. _John, please!_ He thought as hard as he could.

Suddenly, John pulled his hands away, shaking his head. "No! I won't hurt him!" He stumbled to his feet.

"_**I** will."_

"NO!"

Scott lay gasping for breath as he watched his brother fighting with himself. "John..." He rasped.

John whirled around at the sound of his brother's voice. "Scott..." He pressed his hands to his temples as blood began dripping from his nose. He looked up at Scott, his eyes haunted. "I can't stop him...Run...RUN!"

Scott scrambled to his feet as a whiskey bottle went soaring past his head. The bottle hit the wall and shattered, sending glass everywhere. "John, stop!" He ducked as another bottle went flying.

"I thought you weren't afraid, Scott." John/Hood laughed menacingly.

Scott turned. "I'm not. You're the one who stoops to cowardly tactics. Taking over someone else's mind and body. Too afraid to risk your own slimy skin?" Scott taunted.

John/Hood frowned angrily. "I'll kill you for that."

"You can try."

John/Hood rushed forward, catching Scott off guard, and landing a solid punch on his chin. Scott reacted instinctively, throwing a punch of his own to send John crashing to the floor.

"S-Scott?"

John's voice came out a whimper and Scott stared at his clenched fist in shock. "John! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" He rushed to his brother's side, missing the infinitesimal shift in his eyes.

John/Hood lashed out with his legs, sending Scott toppling to the coffee table. The table shattered under him, and Scott yelped in pain as his bad shoulder hit the floor. John/Hood picked up a large piece of broken glass, and stood menacingly over his brother. "Time to finish this I think. Imagine your father's pain to discover that his unwanted son has murdered his beloved son." He laughed evilly. "This is even better than I could have expected."

"You won't kill me, and you won't kill my brother." Scott said coldly.

"You keep telling yourself that Scott." He raised the shard above his head. "Good-bye brother dear."

_John, I'm sorry._ Scott kicked his brother's legs out from under him, causing John to fall in a heap. Before John could recover, Scott bolted to his feet, wincing at the pain in his shoulder and from rolling on the broken glass. He circled around the room, coming to stop behind the couch. "You won't kill us." He said, more forcefully this time.

John/Hood's eyes narrowed. "Perhaps I need to change my tactics then."

"What do you mean?" Scott asked warily.

"You'll see." He picked up the shard of glass he had been holding over Scott. "What a lovely impact John's blood will have on the white furnishings in here. How will you ever get the stains out?" He held the glass so tightly that Scott could see blood start to pool between John's fingers.

"No! John don't! Fight him!" Scott screamed.

For a moment John's eyes cleared, but before he could say anything, the Hood took control again. "He's stronger than I gave him credit for." John/Hood mused.

"You bet your ass he is. He's a Tracy." Scott slowly moved towards John.

"Don't come any closer."

"Stop me."

John/Hood smiled malevolently. "All right." He held the sharp glass against his wrist. "Come any closer, and he dies."

Scott froze instantly. "Let him go...please!"

John/Hood laughed. "The mighty Scott Tracy, begging! How wonderful!"

"Just let him go." Scott pleaded. "Take me instead!"

"Now while this is getting interesting, I feel I've worn out my welcome. Thank you for a lovely time. Good-bye Scott!"

Scott could only watch in horror, as John pressed the glass into his skin.


	39. Chapter 39

Many, many thanks to everyone who helped me out with this chapter! Tikatu, Convert, Grumpy, Kate, Bluegrass, you gals are the best!

As usual, I don't own the characters except for the ones I created.

Read and enjoy!

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Tin-Tin hummed to herself as she took her morning walk along the beach. She paused to pick up a brightly colored shell, then tucked it into her bag. She walked along the ocean's edge, enjoying the feel of the water around her ankles.

Suddenly she froze, the bag of shells dropping to the ground. "John..." She whispered, her chocolate eyes taking on a faraway look. She turned and ran back to the villa.

Alan and Gordon were in the pool, and looked up in surprise as she rushed past them. "What's going on?" Gordon asked.

Alan shrugged. "I have no idea. But I think I'll go find out. Later." He hoisted himself out of the pool and hurried after Tin-Tin. He caught up with her quickly. "Tin-Tin? What's wrong?"

She turned, her eyes wild. "My father! I have to find my father!" She broke free of his grasp and continued up the stairs to the second level. "Dad! Dad!" She ran onto the terrace just as Kyrano and Onaha came rushing out.

"Tin-Tin!" Kyrano called as she ran into his arms.

"John! He's killing John!" Her voice held an edge of hysteria to it.

Kyrano nodded. "I know. He has already broken through my protections and knows where Mr. Tracy is." He gripped his daughter's shoulders. "You have to stop him."

She shook her head. "I can't...he's too strong."

"Yes daughter, you can."

"Somebody want to tell me what's going on?" Alan demanded, his hands folded across his chest.

Tin-Tin whirled around. "Alan! It's my uncle! He's killing John!"

Alan paled. "How?"

She shook her head. "He just is!" She turned back to her parents, tears streaming down her cheeks. "What do I do?"

"You stop him." Kyrano told her.

"I don't know how!" Suddenly she froze. "Alan...Alan!" She turned to him. "Do you trust me?"

Alan frowned. "What?"

"Do you trust me!"

"Of course I—" Before he could finish, Tin-Tin had placed one hand on his face, the other around the crystal at her neck, and closed her eyes. "Tin-Tin, what—" He gasped as the memories flooded through him.

Images of his childhood, his first bike ride, a birthday party, school. Then onto later times, moving to the island, the first launch of Thunderbird One, his first view from space, the Hood.

"No..." Alan started to pull away.

"**_He can't hurt you. John needs your help."_** Tin-Tin's voice sounded in his mind.

"Tin-Tin?"

"_**Trust me Alan."**_

The memories stopped whirling until one image burned itself into his awareness.

"_**Yes Alan, that's perfect...remember...remember..."**_

_I peered around the corner into the kitchen. Good, John was still there. Maybe he would talk to me. "Hi Johnny."_

"_Hey Sprout." He smiled. John always smiled. He's the smiliest person I know. He never yells at anybody. Not even when Gordon let all the chickens out and John had to catch them. He just smiled and said, "Want to see who can catch the most?" Not like Scott. Scott's always grumpy when he gets home. I think they teach him to be grumpy at that Air Force school he's going to._

"_Want a cookie Alan?" _

"_Sure!" I climbed up on the chair and watched as John poured me a glass of milk, chocolate, my favorite, and gave me three cookies! I never get three cookies. Gordon always eats them all._

_John smiled again and ruffled my hair, then went back to putting the dishes away. "John? Can I ask you something?"_

"_Sure Sprout." _

"_When is Mommy coming back? She's been gone a long, long time."_

_John stood very still. I began to get scared. He was going to yell at me, just like Virgil does when I ask about Mommy. _

"_I'm sorry John! I shouldn't have said that. Please don't get mad!" I started to get down from the chair, but a strong hand grabbed my arm._

"_Wait Alan." I turned. He was smiling again, but it was a sad smile. "Sit down." I sat. "Alan, Mommy can't come back. She's gone."_

"_But where did she go?"_

_John sighed. "She's an angel now Alan."_

_An angel! Wow! "Does she have a pretty dress?"_

_John nodded. "I'm sure she does."_

"_And wings?"_

"_And wings."_

_I was quiet a moment, thinking. "Johnny? Did I make Mommy leave?"_

_John closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them, it looked like he was going to cry. That's not right. John never cries. Ever. Even when Daddy had to pull that big splinter out of his foot. He didn't even scream. Virgil cries like a baby._

"_Alan, Mommy got in an accident. A bad accident. Her body was so hurt that God decided to take her up to live with Him so she would feel better."_

"_Did God make her an angel?"_

"_Yes."_

"_I didn't make her go away?"_

"_Alan, you didn't do anything."_

_I put my head down on the table. "I miss her Johnny. Sometimes I forget what she used to look like." I couldn't help it and I started to cry. I'm a big six year old boy! I'm not supposed to cry!_

_John picked me up and held me close. "I'll tell you Alan. I won't let you forget her. I promise."_

_I looked up at my big brother. He had tears running down his cheeks. I cuddled closer and he wrapped his arms around me._

_I guess sometimes, even big boys cry._

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John forced his eyes open. "Alan?"

"_**Fight him John! You're stronger than he is!"**_

"I'm trying...I..."

"**_You told me you'd be there, so don't go welching on that promise now."_**

"Alan..."

"_That's enough from you."_

John found himself alone with the Hood again. "Let me go!"

"_I don't think so. You didn't really believe all that nonsense, did you?"_

John's will faltered and once again, the Hood took control.

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Tin-Tin's eyes snapped open and Alan sagged forward. Kyrano caught him around the shoulders and eased him down to the floor. "Relax Master Alan."

Alan looked up at Tin-Tin through bleary eyes. "Did it work?"

She shook her head. "Not yet." She closed her eyes again. "Mr. Tracy...Jeff...hear me.

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Jeff dropped his fork to his plate with a clatter. "Tin-Tin?" He whispered.

Penny frowned. "Jeff? Is something wrong with your breakfast?"

Jeff stared forward, focusing on something Penny couldn't see. "John...John..."

_Funny, no matter how much things change, how much they stay the same. The gymnasium has a new coat of paint, a few new championship banners, but mostly, it looks like it did all throughout my own school years. _

_It doesn't seem that long ago that I was the one up on that podium, wearing that stupid looking cap, waiting to just get out and make my mark in the 'real world'._

_The music starts and I, along with everyone else, turn and watch them walk in. Did we look that young? That eager to get out and start living life?_

_I listen to the same speeches, only now given by different people. Then, the last speaker approaches the podium, the class valedictorian. I sit up a little straighter to get a better view. My God, how grown up he looks. He stands proudly, his royal blue robes making his eyes even brighter. His white blonde hair nearly hidden by the mortarboard. He speaks of the future, of hopes and dreams, of course, he mentions the stars. _

_I'm so damn proud of him._

_Barely seventeen years old and about to graduate from high school, then onto MIT in the fall, one of the youngest students ever accepted._

_When did my John turn into a man?_

_I think it happened the night Lucy died. My boy was forced to face things I hadn't thought he'd have to face until he was much older. He sobbed that night. As if his heart was broken. Of course it was, his mother was dead. _

_I don't think I've seen him cry since. The others have, Scott I'm sure. He was always closer to Scott than any of the rest of us. Except Alan maybe. He adores Alan. Tolerates him when the others are ready to drop him down the well. And Alan worships the ground John walks on._

_I draw my attention back to the front of the gym. He's laughing now, along with the rest of them. Some joke shared between them all, that we old folks don't understand. He raises his hand for silence and you could hear a pin drop. He takes his tassel and moves it over. The place erupts in a cheer that shakes the rafters, and hats fill the air._

_I swallow the lump in my throat as they start back down the aisle. John catches my eye and grins. I smile proudly._

_See that young man? The one with stars in his eyes? The one who's leading them?_

_That's my boy._

------------------------------------------------------------------

"Dad?"

"_**John, I'm here."**_

"Dad, I never knew..."

"_**I know, I should have told you how proud I was. How proud I still am."**_

"I can do this."

"_**Yes, you can. Drive him out. Out of your head. Out of your life."**_

"_Why Jeff, how nice of you to join the party."_

"_**Don't listen to him John."**_

"_Telling him how to live his life again Jeff?"_

"_**He can't hurt you if you don't want him to John."**_

"I...I know that now." John took control of himself and pulled the glass away from his wrist.

"John?" Scott called out.

John looked up and nodded. "I'm trying Scott...I'm trying..." He bit back a moan and clenched his eyes shut. "No! You can't make me do this." His hands shook and involuntarily tightened on the glass again. "Please..."

-------------------------------------------------------

Jeff collapsed, head down on the table. Penny was at his side in an instant. "Jeff? Jeff what's wrong? Parker! A doctor, quickly!"

Jeff tried to sit up, Penny helping lean him back in the chair. "No, no doctor. I'm fine." He said hoarsely.

"Like bloody hell you are." She took in how pale he was. "What happened?"

Jeff brought a hand to his aching head. "It's John. Tin-Tin somehow sent me to him."

"Tin-Tin?"

Jeff nodded and winced as his head exploded in agony. "Look Pen, I think I need to go lay down." He got unsteadily to he feet and swayed as the room spun around him. "Will you call John? Find out what's happening. And the island too."

"Of course. Let's get you to bed." She wrapped one arm around his waist and led him out the door.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Virgil ran through his scales once more and sighed. Deciding he'd had enough practice, he launched into Beethoven. He closed his eyes and lost himself in the music.

"_**Virgil!"**_

His fingers faltered on the keys. "Tin-Tin?" He looked around in confusion. "What's going on?"

"_**John needs you."**_

Virgil shook his head. "I need sleep. I'm hearing things." He had just started playing again, when the memories tore through his head.

"_Make sure you put the heavy ones outside in the shed. Don't put them in the barn."_

_John, mother-henning us again. You'd think I'd never brought hay in before._

_He went on. "I have to get to town and pick up Alan and Gordon. I mean it Virgil. Keep those bales outside. I don't want the barn burning down one night."_

_I sighed. "John, that's a myth. Wet bales don't just catch on fire."_

"_Yes genius, they do. It's called combustion. Look, just do it OK?"_

_I nodded, rolling my eyes. "Yes, John."_

_I watched as he drove off, then turned to my task. "Stupid hay. We don't even have animals anymore, why bale the hay?" I loaded the bales on the pick-up and drove them to the barn. I looked down at my watch. If I hurried, I could get in an extra half-hour of practice before the others got home. Gordon especially. He just can't appreciate good music. That rock crap he listens to is the farthest thing from being music. Nothing but noise._

_I quickly drove over to the barn and tossed the hay up into the loft. My piano was calling._

_Shouting woke me._

"_John, call the fire department! Wake Virgil and have him keep Alan and Gordon in the house."_

"_I'm on it Dad."_

_I heard the front door slam as I rushed out of my room. "What's going on?"_

_John was quickly dialing the phone. "The barn's on fire."_

_I felt a chill run through me. "F-Fire?"_

_John nodded and turned his attention to the phone. I was numb as I watched him rush out the door._

_It seemed like days for the fire to be extinguished. Dad and John came in, covered in soot and grime. Both were coughing, and John had a thin cut on his forehead. Apparently the heat had blown out the windows, and a piece of glass caught John._

_It's all my fault._

_I can hear Dad shouting now. I told the kids to stay in bed and crept down the stairs to see what was going on._

"_Dammit John! How many times have I told you, wet hay doesn't go in the barn!"_

"_I'm sorry Dad." _

"_Sorry isn't going to get us a new building. What if we had stock in there? Did you ever think of that?"_

"_No sir."_

"_You're going to pay for half the damage. We can work it out with your allowance."_

"_Yes sir."_

"_Go to bed, we'll talk in the morning."_

_I hurried up the stairs before John could catch me. Unfortunately I tripped. John came up and helped me to my feet._

"_John, I'm sorry. It was my fault."_

_He shook his head. "No Virgil, I should have checked. I assumed that it was all taken care of." He shrugged again. "I'm beat, see you in the morning."_

_I watched as John went into his room and shut the door._

_I barely slept the rest of the night, waiting for John to tell Dad what had really happened. _

_But he never did._

_John worked his butt off, earning enough money for repairs, then spending a month helping Dad and Mr. Murray from next door, build it up again. All his savings- he'd been saving up for a new telescope- went into that barn. I waited and waited for the day he would come down on me, demanding that I take my share of the blame._

_John never said a word._

----------------------------------------

John gritted his teeth and forced his hand back from his wrist. "You won't do this to me."

"_But I am John."_

Was it John's imagination or was the voice getting weaker. "You won't poison me against my family anymore."

"_Then I suppose I shall just have to kill you."_

Scott could only watch helplessly, as John began to scream.

-------------------------------------------------

Tin-Tin looked up at her father. "It's working. He's getting weaker."

Kyrano nodded. "Good."

Alan smiled wearily. "And John?"

Tin-Tin's eyes unfocused. "He's fighting him."

Just then, Virgil staggered onto the terrace. His face was pale and a thin sheen of sweat covered his forehead. Onaha was at his side in an instant, helping him to a chair. "I think I'm going to be sick." He mumbled.

Onaha quickly pushed his head between his knees. "Breathe easily Virgil...relax." She looked over at her husband. "We need to alert Mr. Brains. He needs to know what is going on."

Kyrano nodded. "Will you be alright?" He asked Tin-Tin and Alan. She nodded and he quickly hurried off. "What's wrong with Virgil?" Alan asked wearily.

"I did to him what I did to you. But he is not as...close to me as you are. It was harder on him."

Virgil looked up, his face still pale. "What the hell is going on?" He demanded angrily.

Onaha answered for the others. "Your brother is in trouble. Tin-Tin is trying to save him."

Virgil's eyes sharpened. "The Hood?" She nodded. "Fuck." Virgil got unsteadily to his feet and swayed as the room spun around him. "Whoa..."

"Sit down, you're not going anywhere." Onaha commanded as she pushed him back down in the chair. "Tin-Tin, is John safe now? Tin-Tin?"

They all turned to look at her. Tin-Tin had her eyes closed and clutched her crystal tightly. "No! Gordon...help him!"

----------------------------------------------------------

Gordon cut through the water like a shark, his strokes powerful and sure. He hit the wall, and dove, turning towards the opposite end of the pool. He was halfway across when a flash of pain shot through his head. His stroke faltered and he foundered to the side of the pool, trying to hoist himself up onto the patio.

The memories swam, unasked for, through his mind. He clenched his eyes shut against them. "No...I don't want to remember...no..."

"_**RED ALERT...RED ALERT...RED ALERT!"**_

_I looked up from where I was talking to Onaha. "What the hell?" Scott was already rushing past me, and I followed at his heels. I ran into Virgil out in the hallway._

"_What's going on?" He demanded, his hair still mussed from sleep. No worms for this bird, if Virgil got up before noon, it would be a miracle._

_I shrugged. "I've got no idea."_

_He shot me a quick grin. "Think Alan blew something up again?"_

_I bit back a smile as we rushed into Dad's office. Brains was already activating the Command and Control switch. I pulled on a shirt and glanced up at Brains as I made my way to my alcove. _

"_How bad Brains?" I heard my Dad ask his voice oddly strained._

"_Thunderbird Five, major damage sustained. Possible strike by a m-m-m-fu-possible strike by a—"_

"_Meteor."_

"_Yep."_

_Dad quickly got into his alcove. "Thunderbirds are go."_

_Thunderbird Five was hit by a meteor? John! I willed the lift to move faster, but it continued at its normal pace. I reached the locker room at the same time as the others and we dressed in silence. As we started down the tube towards Thunderbird Three, I pushed ahead of Scott, getting to the pilot's seat. Virgil sat next to me and Dad took his usual spot between us. Scott didn't say a word as he slipped into one of the two jump seats in the back._

_I began the start up procedure, Virgil doing the same on his side. The one bad thing about TB 3, was that it took two of us to pilot her. _

"_Check retros." Dad ordered._

"_Go." Scott responded a heartbeat later._

_I pressed the final button and braced myself for the g-forces as the giant rocket shot out of the library._

"_Plot the shortest course. I don't care who sees us." Dad told Virgil._

"_FAB Dad."_

"_Scott, keep trying your brother."_

"_Right Dad. Thunderbird Three calling Thunderbird Five...Come in John."_

_I shot a glance at Virgil. I hoped I didn't look as scared as he did. Behind me, I could hear Scott still trying to raise John. I suppressed the fear bubbling up inside me. John couldn't be dead. He couldn't be!_

_Four years ago..._

"_John! I'm going to be late!" I yelled._

_John came down the stairs, pulling on his coat. "Relax Guppy, we have plenty of time."_

"_I need to warm up."_

"_You won't be late." He said again as we headed out to the car. _

_I quickly buckled myself in and we started down the road. "You going to stay and watch?"_

_John smiled. "Don't I always?"_

_I grinned. "You just like looking at the guys in their Speedos." I cracked._

_John didn't bat an eyelash. "Yeah, always looking for someone to fix you up with."_

_We both burst out laughing. That's one thing I loved about John. He was one of the few people who actually got my sense of humor. And on the rare occasion he played a prank, it rivaled mine. Truly, the man was a god._

_I reached over and flipped on the radio, hunting until I found a heavy rock station. I turned it up a notch, and John winced, but didn't ask me to turn it down. He knew I needed to settle my nerves. We drove in silence, me tapping my fingers on the dash in time to the music._

"_This is it huh?"_

_I turned the radio down. "Yeah." I sighed. "John, do you think I can do this?"_

_John didn't answer, but instead pulled over to the side of the road. Great, here it comes. I wasn't good enough and John, being John, was going to let me down gently. I turned and pressed my forehead against the cool glass of the window._

"_Gordon. Gordon look at me." I turned. "Why these doubts?" I shrugged. "Gordon."_

_Damn, he was persistent. "I don't know. I'm the youngest guy on the team, all the others have more experience than I do."_

"_Can any of them swim faster than you?"_

"_No."_

"_Are you lacking in any of the skills you need to get a place?"_

"_No."_

"_Have you tried your hardest, done your best?"_

_I nodded._

"_Do **you** think you can do it?"_

_I paused, then looked up at him. "Yes."_

_John smiled. "Then brother mine, let's go. You have a date with the Olympic qualifying team."_

_I smiled at the memory. John was the one who had taken me to every practice, every meet. Sure, the others were there too, but John never missed a one. He gave me criticism each time too. Good and bad. And even when the bad pissed me off, after I thought about it a bit, I had to admit that he was right._

_He even skipped his chance to walk on the moon in order to see me compete in Paris. How do you thank a guy for that? I tried to give him my gold, but he wouldn't take it. "You earned it Guppy."_

_He can't be dead._

_I pushed Thunderbird Three a little harder. I felt a slight tremor shudder through her, but the diagnostics stayed clear. I could still hear Scott desperately calling for John._

_Two hours._

_It was going to take us two hours to get there, even using the shortest trajectory. I didn't want to think of what had happened. Maybe communications are just out. Maybe there was no meteor, he just dropped a mug of hot chocolate on the computer and shorted out the system._

_Yeah, and Alan's a Thunderbird._

_Suddenly the voice we'd been waiting to hear, blasted across the speakers._

"_I'm losing all power...Repeat I'm losing all power!"_

_I tried not to react to the panic clearly evident in John's voice._

"_Hold on John, we're coming in." How did Dad sound so calm?_

"_Hurry Dad..." John's voice was clearly weaker that time. I pushed TB 3 a bit more. A moment later, the station came into view._

_My first thought was that it had to be a miracle John survived. The outer ring was completely destroyed in one section, and debris floated everywhere. Thank God the docking arm appeared to be undamaged. But we wouldn't know for sure until we got closer._

_I stole a look at my father. He had a grim expression on his face, and he held the arms of his seat in a death grip. He shifted his attention to me and nodded. "Gordon, prepare for docking."_

"_You got it Dad." I turned back to the controls. "Reverse main thrusters on my mark. Three...two...one..."_

"_Easy, watch the roll." Dad warned._

_Virgil's fingers flew across the board. "Roll index angle, minus two degrees."_

_I deftly turned the ship, trying to get close to the station. Usually the computer did all this, I just had to put her in place. Hadn't done a manual docking in a long time._

"_**Initiate docking sequence."**_

_A few more seconds...or was it hours...and a shudder went through the ship. "We're locked on." _

"_Nice work." Dad started unbuckling his safety harness. **"Docking sequence complete."**_

_Scott was already at the door, punching the keys to open the door. "Tunnel hatch secured."_

"_Emergency packs boys." Dad said as he hoisted the pack on his shoulders. Virgil handed one to me and we hurried towards the hatch._

"_**Airlock pressure equalized."**_

_Dad pushed in front of Scott and keyed in the last codes. "We're in. Let's go."_

_The damage to the outside was nothing compared to what met us when we walked into the station. Smoke filled the room and sparks flew across the consoles. The only illumination came from the small fires were burning everywhere. I stared, unable to move at the destruction. We hadn't heard from John since his hail fifteen minutes ago. I prayed that he was still with us._

_A figure staggered out of the shadows. "John!" Dad rushed forward, beckoning to Scott at the same time. "Scott, tackle that fire!"_

_I breathed a huge sigh of relief. _

"_Am I glad to see you guys."_

_My brother was alive._

------------------------------------------------------

John flung the shard of glass across the room. "No, you won't do this. You won't control me."

"_But John, I already do."_

John gritted his teeth. "Never." He growled.

"_Are you so sure about that?"_

"Yes. You lied. You've been lying to me the whole time." John looked up and started fearlessly into Scott's eyes. "My family cares about me. You don't."

Scott smiled. "You tell him John."

"_I grow tired of this."_

"Then get out." John snapped. Suddenly he yelped and brought his hands to his temples. "No..."

"_If I can't get rid of you one way, I'll try another."_

-------------------------------------------------------

Tin-Tin dropped to her knees moaning. Onaha rushed to her side. "Tin-Tin!"

"Is she alright?" Alan rasped.

Tin-Tin looked up, her chocolate eyes wide. "Gordon, someone get to Gordon."

Brains, Fermat, Steve and Kyrano had run in, in time to hear her last line. Brains glanced around, then bolted down the stairs to the pool. Fermat knelt beside his friends.

"A-A-Alan?"

"I'm OK Fermat. Just my head." Alan closed his eyes and leaned heavily against Fermat.

They all started as they heard a loud splash from the pool. Steve hurried down the stairs. Virgil started to follow but was pushed back down by Onaha. "Stay here. They will take care of Gordon."

A few moments later, Gordon appeared at the doorway, supported on either side by Steve and Brains. Virgil pushed up from his chair and hurried to his brother's side. Gordon's eyes were wide with fear. "John, Thunderbird Five's been hit. He's in trouble."

Virgil looked at Brains in confusion. "H-H-He's very disorientated. We had to pull him out of the p-p-water."

Virgil frowned and lightly slapped his brother's cheeks. "Gordon? C'mon Gords, snap out of it!"

Gordon shook his head. "Virg? What happened?" His eyes started to roll back and Brains and Steve lowered him to the ground.

Virgil shook his head and swayed again. Brains quickly helped him down too as Steve checked both their vitals. "Wh-what is happening?" He glanced over at Tin-Tin, who was quickly regaining color.

"We're winning. John is starting to fight back. He now sees Hood for what he truly is." She told them.

Kyrano nodded. "Good. I must call Mr. Tracy. Lady Penelope also needs to know what has happened."

Tin-Tin closed her eyes again. "Keep fighting him John." She whispered. Then her eyes snapped open. She bared her teeth and snarled. "You will not have him!" She gripped the crystal around her neck as her eyes shifted color. The others all stared at her, afraid to disturb her. "Scott...Scott..."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Scott hurried to his brother's side, only to be knocked back by John's fist. He staggered backwards, bringing his hand to his lip. "Damn you, you won't keep me from my brother!"

John/Hood looked up, his eyes once again an evil red. "You all think you can stop me? My little niece may have gotten stronger, but she will fail. John is mine, to use or destroy, as I wish."

"Over my dead body."

"That can be arranged." John/Hood closed his eyes and his body shook. When his eye's opened again, Scott could see they were back to blue, and filled with fear. Fear and something else...

"John?"

"I have to stop him Scott. He's going to kill me and go after..." His eyes clenched shut and he moaned. "Please Scott, help me..." John whispered urgently.

"I don't know how!" Scott said desperately. "John, what do I do?"

"_**Remember Scott. Remember happier times."**_

Scott's head snapped up. "Tin-Tin?"

"_**Think of John, Scott, think of John."**_

"_Where is that little bugger?" _

_I had searched all of John's usual haunts, his room, the den, the kitchen, even the shed roof, where he had his new telescope. That makes what, three now? I mean c'mon how many of the things does one person need?_

_I stopped in the middle of the barn. "JOHN!" I bellowed._

"_What?"_

_I jumped, not expecting him to sound so close. "Where are you?"_

"_Up here!"_

_I looked up. Sure enough, John's head was poking out from the hayloft._

"_What are you doing up there?"_

_John shrugged. "Hiding. Gordon got his allowance today."_

_I suppressed a shudder. Any day Gordon got money, was a day I checked my shorts for itching powder. "Want some company?"_

_John shrugged again and disappeared from view. I took that as a fifteen year olds way of saying 'yes', and climbed up after him. I looked around. John had stacked up a bunch of hay bales and covered them with a blanket. He had stuck a small lamp, I could see the extension cord disappearing in the bales, next to a pile of books and magazines. The inevitable telescope was propped up in the window. I shook my head. "Nice place you got here, John-boy."_

"_Thanks." John stuck his nose back in his book. Sarcasm has always been lost on my little brother._

"_Home schooling working out for you?"_

"_Yup."_

"_You've been keeping your grades up?"_

"_Uh-huh."_

_I sighed. "So, how have things been around here?"_

_John didn't look up. "OK."_

"_Yeah?"_

"_Yeah."_

_I swear, getting this kid to talk was like pulling teeth. I walked over and pushed the book down. "John."_

_He looked up at me and sighed, before looking back down at his book. "Things are fine Scott. You don't have to worry."_

"_I'm the oldest. It's my job to worry." I sat down on the bale next to him. "Heard a rumor that you got your learner's permit."_

"_Yeah."_

"_You going to take me for a ride?"_

"_In what? The old station wagon? Yeah, right. I hate that thing, and Dad won't let me take the SUV without him."_

"_Then how about your new car." I dropped a set of keys in his lap. That got his attention._

"_What? What new car?" He picked up the keys and looked closely at them. His head snapped up. "Wait a sec, these are **yours**!"_

"_Not anymore they're not."_

"_B-But Scott, this is your Pontiac! You've worked your butt off to fix up that car." He shook his head. "I can't take these." He pushed the keys back at me._

"_Sure you can John. Look, I'm off to boot camp, then I have four years of active duty ahead of me. How often am I going to get home? Once a year? Twice if I'm lucky? I'd sleep better at night knowing you were taking care of her."_

_John looked up, his blue eyes wide. God, those eyes. Just like Mom's. You always knew what John was thinking, just by looking into them. I smiled. "C'mon sport, let's go try out your new wheels."_

Scott slumped to his knees, moaning at both the pain in his head and his shoulder.

The sight pushed John to the front of his mind. He got to his feet and marched over to the mirror above the bar. "You won't hurt me or my family any more." He growled.

The air next to him seemed to shimmer and John could see Hood standing next to him. _"You can't stop me now."_

"Yes. I. Can." John stared fearlessly at his enemy. "Get out."

"_I will kill you John."_

"No you won't."

"_It would be like snapping a twig."_

Was it John's imagination, or was Hood getting weaker. "Give it your best shot, asshole. My family cares about me."

"_You believe all that trash my niece has shown you? How do you know she didn't manufacture those memories?"_

"Because I was there." John spun on his heel and walked over to kneel next to Scott. "Scott, are you alright?"

Scott looked up through bleary eyes. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"_Perhaps I should kill Scott as well."_

John ignored the voice and helped his brother to his feet. "Easy Scott." His eyes clenched shut as pain tore through his head. "I won't let you do this!"

"John!" Scott placed a hand on his brother's arm. "Fight him kiddo. Fight him."

"_**You can do this John. Trust me."**_

"Tin-Tin?"

"_Ah, little niece. I'd wondered when you were going to show up."_

"_**I won't let you hurt my family any more."**_

"_And you think your pitiful power will be able to stop me?"_Hood laughed evilly. _"Try and stop me."_

"_**John. Listen only to my voice. Drive him out!"**_

"I—I'm trying..."

"_**Think of your family, reflect on what I've shown you. Stop believing his lies."**_

"Right, my family." John took a deep breath and concentrated as hard as he could. "Get out of my head."

Across the room, Scott stood very still. He was unable to hear anything except for John's voice, but somehow he knew that whatever was going on would make or break his brother.

"_John...I am your friend."_

"You're no friend of mine." John's voice grew stronger.

"_I gave you everything."_

"You turned me against everyone I loved!"

"_I thought that was what you wanted."_ Hood's voice grew weaker.

"You tried to kill me!"

"_I apologized."_

John could barely hear the voice. "I don't accept your apology. **GET OUT OF MY HEAD YOU SON OF A BITCH!**" John shouted, startling Scott.

"_NO!" _A sharp, bright light flashed behind John's eyes and he fell to the floor, moaning in agony.

"**_John! John! You did it! He's gone!"_** John couldn't answer, his head felt like it had exploded. He clutched at his temples, the pain in his head making his stomach churn. **_"You will be safe now. Let Scott help you. I'll talk to you soon."_** John's mind grew quiet and he let out a sigh that was nearly a sob.

Scott knelt down next to his brother. "John?" He called tentatively.

John looked up, tears streaming down his face. "He's gone...it's over."

"Oh John..." Scott clasped his brother close, ignoring his own pain. Scott finally felt John start to pull back and he gazed down into his brother's eyes. "Are you alright?"

John shook his head and winced. "No. I need to lie down...before I pass out." He surveyed the wreck of the living room, smiling wryly. "Guess the couch is out." He struggled to his feet, swaying unsteadily for moment.

"Easy bro." Scott got to his feet, trying to hold back a yelp at the pain in his own head and shoulder.

John frowned. "Scott?"

"It's nothing. Let's get upstairs." Halfway up the stairs, John faltered and would have fallen if Scott hadn't grabbed him. "John?"

"I...I can't...God it hurts..." John whispered.

"C'mon, just a little further...I can't carry you John. You need to get up." Scott gritted his teeth and hauled his brother to his feet. Together they staggered into the bedroom. "You going to clean up first?"

John merely moaned and collapsed on his bed. Scott pulled a blanket up over him and then collapsed on his own bed across the room. The phone started to ring, but Scott didn't have the energy to get up an answer it. John didn't even move.

Finally the ringing stopped and Scott closed his eyes, letting the blackness overtake him.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Tin-Tin dropped to her knees, her breath coming out in a sob. Alan was at her side in an instant. "Tin-Tin?"

She looked up at him, her eyes brimming with tears. "It's over. We did it."

"John?"

"He's safe. He's alive. Hood won't touch him again."

"Thank God." He pulled her into his arms and held her close.

Virgil shared an amused glance with Brains, who grinned in return before turning his attention back to Gordon. "I sug-sug-think you should all go down to the in-in-sickbay so Steve can take a look at you."

"I agree." Steve added, helping Virgil to his feet. "Let's get whoever's mobile down there first. Brains, will you stay with Gordon? I'll be back with the stretcher." Brains nodded and Steve wrapped an arm around Virgil's waist, leading him away. Onaha helped Tin-Tin to her feet, pulling her daughter close.

Fermat reached down and hauled Alan up, holding his friend's arm until Alan steadied himself. "Thanks Fermat." Alan said quietly, closing his eyes as the room spun.

"C-C-Come on. Lean on me." Together they followed Virgil and Steve.

Kyrano walked over and wrapped his arms around his family. "You have done well daughter. I am very proud of you."

Tin-Tin beamed up at him. "Thanks Dad. But I didn't do it alone. We all stopped him."

Kyrano pulled them close again. "That we did. That we did."

---------------------------------------------------------------

Meanwhile, in a remote section of the English countryside, Trangh Belagant, the Hood, screamed in frustration and anger. "No! He's mine! Mine! **MINE!**"


	40. Chapter 40

Here it is, better late than never! The inspiration in this chap came from a certain picture I was sent. Thanks Fayesy!

I don't own the Thunderbirds, so please don't sue!

* * *

Scott woke up and stared at the ceiling in confusion. Then, as his brain started waking up, he remembered the events of last night. _John, the Hood._ He glanced over to his brother's bed. It was empty.

Scott sat up quickly and moaned, his left hand going to his bad shoulder. He slowly eased himself to his feet, and went in search of his brother.

He found John standing in the doorway to the living room, a steaming mug of cocoa in his hands. "Hey." Scott called out quietly.

John looked up and smiled softly. "Hey." He shrugged in the direction of the room. "Hell of a mess I made."

Scott peered over John's shoulder. "Yeah, and how many coffee tables have you replaced since you've been here now? Two? Three?"

John chuckled. "C'mon, this is depressing me." They walked into the kitchen. "Want some breakfast?"

"Not if you're cooking." Scott laughed.

John narrowed his eyes and stuck out his tongue. "I can make cereal. You just add the milk."

"I don't want to take any chances just the same, thanks." Scott walked over and pulled a bowl down from the cupboard. His shoulder spasmed and the bowl fell to the floor and shattered.

"Scott!" John hurried to his brother's side. "What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing." Scott said through clenched teeth.

"Don't lie to me."

Scott took a shuddering breath. "I'm OK."

John steered him to a chair. "Like hell you are. Is it your shoulder? What..." His voice trailed off as the color left his face. "Fuck. I screwed that up too." He bolted from the room.

"John wait!" Scott hurried after his brother. _Please don't leave the house, please don't leave the house..._He had just gotten to the doorway, when the phone rang. Scott groaned. "Great timing." He muttered as he turned and answered. "Yeah?"

"_Scott?"_

"Virg, hi. Look, this isn't a good time OK."

"_Oh really? I have a headache the size of Thunderbird Two, Gordon is conked out down in the infirmary, Alan's not much better, and you tell me this isn't a good time?"_

"That's exactly what I'm telling you. I'll call you later. Bye."

"_Scott wait—"_

Scott hung up the phone and rushed out into the hallway. He paused listening. The faint sound of water running reached his ears. "Gotcha." Scott went back into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. Then he made his way upstairs.

* * *

John let the hot water wash over him. Every inch of his body ached. His head though, his head was strangely quiet. He hadn't realized until now, just how loud his..._correction, Hood's..._thoughts had been.

He stayed under the spray a moment longer, the shut the water off. Stepping out, he wrapped a towel around his waist and paused to look in the mirror. There was a nasty looking bruise darkening one cheek, and his arms, chest and back were covered in tiny cuts. He examined, with interest, the deep cut on his wrist. The gash was deep, but not dangerously so, and he flexed his hand, wincing only a little. _Good, no muscle damage. The bastard._

John looked again in the mirror. There were deep circles under his eyes, and his face looked wan and pale. The shower had done nothing to help his headache either. Sighing he stepped out into his bedroom.

"Thought you were going to stay in there forever."

John yelped. "Jesus Scott! Don't _do_ that!"

Scott grinned from his place on the bed. "Just keeping you on your toes Johnny boy."

"Yeah well, now that you've done that, you can get out of my bedroom so I can get dressed." John snapped back.

Scott raised an eyebrow at his brother's tone. "Funny, I thought it was my bedroom too."

John merely glared. Scott looked calmly back. "Fine, avert your eyes."

"You got something I should worry about there Blondie?"

"Scott..."

"Fine." Scott closed his eyes.

John quickly pulled on a pair of jeans. "Alright, what is so important that you need to camp out in _my_ bedroom while I'm in the shower?"

Scott ignored the 'my' comment. "Just wanted to talk to you. About last night."

"I don't want to talk about it." John turned and started to pull a shirt over his head.

Scott sighed. "John, you have to—what the hell is that?"

John looked up. "Huh?" Then his blue eyes opened wide and he quickly pulled his shirt on. "Nothing, you didn't see anything."

"Like hell I didn't." Scott got up and marched over to his brother. John backed away. "Take off your shirt." Scott commanded.

"Scott, I didn't think I was your type. Virgil maybe, but not me." John smiled charmingly, trying to divert his brother's attention.

"Ha ha. Take it off."

John sighed and pulled his shirt off.

"Turn around." Scott's voice was like steel.

"Scott look, it's my life and if I choose to—"

"A tattoo! John you got a _tattoo!_"

"Yeah, but it's just a little one—"

"It's still a tattoo John! When did you get this?"

"A few weeks ago. Christa and I were at the beach and—"

"You do realize that Dad is going to kill you."

"It's my body and I—"

"I can't believe this, not of you. Alan maybe, even Gordon, but _you? _Got anything else I should know about? Any weird piercings or something like that?"

John glared at his brother. "Can I get a word in edgewise here?

Scott frowned. "Fine. This I've got to hear."

John pulled the shirt back over his head. "As I was saying. We were at the beach one day, and happened to pass a tattoo parlor. She dared me to get one."

"A dare? You permanently marked your body _on a dare?_" Scott was incredulous.

John shook his head. "Give me a little credit, will you. I went inside and looked around. This guy was a real artist. Some of his stuff was just gorgeous. He had art awards and everything. Virgil would have loved it."

"This still doesn't explain why you have a tattoo." Scott growled.

"I'm getting to it!" John took a deep breath. "I got to talking to him, he asked if I had ever considered getting one. I replied no, I was there under duress. So, he asked what my interests were and started sketching out a few designs. No pressure. Well, one caught my eye and...the rest is history."

"Let me see it."

John rolled his eyes and once again, pulled off his shirt. "See, it's not bad."

"Hmmm..." Scott peered closely at his brother's left shoulder blade. The tattoo was a star. _Big surprise there._ But instead of the normal five pointed variety, this one was drawn with intricate Celtic knots. It was shades of blacks and blues and a darker set of six small stars ran over it. "What are these?" Scott asked, lightly touching the smaller stars.

"The constellation Libra. My sign." John pulled his shirt back on and turned to his brother. "Well?"

"I guess it's all right." Scott muttered, turning away.

Feeling as if he had won a victory of sorts, John grinned. "I could take you there if you're interested."

Scott whirled and pointed a finger at his brother. "Don't push your luck kid."

John smiled, but it faded as he watched Scott rotate his shoulder and wince. "Scott? I'm...I'm sorry."

Scott shook his head. "It's not your fault."

"Yeah, it is." John sat down on the edge of the bed. "I destroyed our family Scott."

"No you didn't John."

John looked up at his brother with haunted eyes. "Yes, I did." He sighed. "And before you go ahead and say it was the Hood, that's not entirely true. Sure, he helped, but mostly, it was me."

"How can you say that?" Scott shook his head.

"Alot of the stuff that I did, that I said...I meant it. I wanted to get away from all of you. I wanted a chance at a life."

"That's understandable."

John got to his feet and paced the room. "You don't get it Scott! I wanted to leave! The family, IR, all of it! I just wanted to be alone for a while to figure out what **I** wanted out of life."

Scott was quiet a few moments. "And did you figure it out?"

John stood and stared out the window. "I thought I did." He said softly.

"Christa?"

John nodded. "I love her."

Scott walked over to stand next to his brother. "What happened John?"

John shook his head. "What do you think? I drove her away like I did everyone else."

"Did you ever think that maybe you were wrong? That maybe she wasn't the one you thought she was?" John turned, a frown on his face. Scott went on, "I mean, she didn't stick John. She left when you needed her most."

John shook his head. "No, it was my fault."

"John, look—"

"I pushed her down the stairs, Scott. I slapped her and shoved her down the stairs." Scott looked at his brother in horror. John shrugged. "So, I really can't blame her for leaving, can you?" He sighed and ran a hand tiredly through his hair. "Did you call the doctor?"

Scott nodded. "Yeah, I go see her tomorrow."

"I'll drop you off."

"Thanks." They both grew quiet again. "By the way, Virgil and Dad called. I hung up on Virg, told him I'd call back later, but Dad is waiting to hear from you. He wouldn't take no for an answer."

John grimaced. "Guess I'd better get to it then huh? Wouldn't want the old guy to blow a blood vessel."

Scott laughed. He pulled John into a loose embrace. "Glad to have you back bro."

"Thanks Scott." John clung to his brother for a moment, then pulled back. "Rest that shoulder."

"Yes Sir!" Scott mock saluted, and shaking his head, John left the room.

He made his way down the stairs and sat down in the office. Taking a deep breath, John dialed the number to Foxelyheath. His father answered almost immediately.

"_John?"_

"Hey, Dad. How are you?"

"_Forget me, what the hell happened yesterday?"_

"I...I'm not really sure."

"_Turn on the video John."_

"Dad..."

"_NOW."_ Jeff's tone booked no argument.

John sighed and flipped the switch on the computer. He started at his father's image. Jeff was pale with dark circles under his eyes. His forehead was creased as if he had a headache. "Dad? Are you alright?"

"_I could ask the same of you? What happened?"_

"It was...Hood. He..." John's voice trailed off. "I'm not really sure, to tell you the truth. I remember...memories, but they weren't mine. Well, they were, but I could see them from another point of view." He looked up. "I never knew what you felt Dad."

Jeff sighed. _"I should have told you I was proud of you. That I still am."_

John smiled softly. "Thanks Dad."

"_You're welcome." _Jeff paused. _"Is he...gone?"_

"I think so. It's alot quieter up in the old gray matter anyway."

"_John."_

Now it was John's turn to sigh. "Yeah, I think he is."

"_I guess we've all been underestimating Tin-Tin."_

"That's for sure." John was still a moment. "You...You saw..."

Jeff shook his head. _"No, not everything. Just you at graduation. But I did talk to Virgil. He said that they all went through more or less the same thing, different memories. John, I'm coming out there."_

John's head snapped up. "No Dad, really. I'm fine."

"_I don't care. There's a major storm system brewing over the Atlantic. As soon as there's a flight window, I'm coming."_

"Dad..."

"_No arguments John. I've left you alone long enough."_ Jeff's brown eyes bore into his son's blue ones.

"I guess I'll see you in a few days then." John said morosely.

"_I guess you will. Take care of yourself John."_

"FAB Dad, you too." John signed off and put his still aching head in his hands. _Dad's coming. Terrific. Guess I'd better get started on the living room._

With one last sigh, he got to his feet and made his way downstairs.


	41. Chapter 41

Hello everyone! Sorry for the long delay, but real life got in the way again.

Many, many thanks to everyone who helped me out with this chapter. Tikatue, Grumpy, Convert, Bluegrass! Kyrano would have gotten axed without you!

Again, I don't own them, so please don't sue.

* * *

Virgil stared up at the ceiling in his father's office.

"_**Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring...Ring..."**_

Snarling, he disconnected the call and marched into the kitchen.

"Any luck reaching Mr. John?" Kyrano asked, setting a glass of orange juice in front of Virgil.

"Thanks Kyrano. No. He's not answering." Virgil swallowed half the juice in one gulp. And I know he's there, Dad said he talked to him yesterday."

"Perhaps, Mr. John does not wish to discuss the incident yet."

"I really don't care. This whole thing has gone on long enough." He sighed irritably.

Alan walked in at that moment. "Hey." He said wearily, plopping himself down in the seat next to Virgil. "I just went to see Gordon. He's awake, but really ugly."

"Headache?"

Alan nodded. "Yeah. Steve gave him something for it and said once it kicked in, Gordon would probably be out of it for the rest of the day."

"Good, let him rest." Virgil eyed his younger brother critically. "How are you feeling this morning?"

"Like sh-crap." Alan rubbed his temples. "The headache's almost gone, but I feel like I've been run over by a truck."

Virgil smiled. "Yeah, I feel kinda like that myself."

"Did you get in touch with John?"

Virgil's smile faded. "No, not yet."

Alan glanced up at Kyrano, who nodded encouragingly. "You know Virg, maybe we should just give John a little space for now. Let him sort things out first."

Virgil turned to his younger brother, his hazel eyes flashing fire. "That's been the whole problem all along! 'Just leave him alone, he'll be fine.' Yeah, that worked _really _well now didn't it?" Virgil pushed off from the table and stormed out of the room.

Alan watched him go and sighed. "This sucks Kyrano."

"I agree, it is not pleasant." Kyrano replied.

"Everybody's fighting. I just don't know what to do anymore..." Alan's voice trailed off.

The Malaysian man sat down next to Alan. "There is nothing you can do at this point Alan. You, Virgil, Gordon...you must all let John work things out on his own, in his own way."

Alan sighed. "Yeah, but like Virg said, that hasn't really worked so far."

"You are all under the impression that Hood is entirely behind John's behavior."

Alan looked up in surprise. "Of course he is!"

Kyrano shook his head. "No, Alan he was not."

Alan stared at the man in surprise. "But—but John—"

"Mr. John has many feelings and thoughts that he has buried deep inside himself. Things that have not even begun to reach the surface yet. The John you are all waiting for to return, he is gone Alan."

Alan looked at Kyrano in stunned disbelief. "You mean John...he's not coming back?"

Kyrano shook his head. "You misunderstand what I am saying. Come with me." He led Alan over to the counter, and pulled a piece of fruit out of the bowl. "What is this?"

Alan looked at him as if he had lost his mind. "An orange."

"Very good." Pulling a large knife out of the drawer, Kyrano deftly sliced the orange down the middle, cut it in half, then peeled and quartered it, handing a section to Alan. "Eat it."

"OK..." Mystified, Alan took a bite and chewed. "Yeah, tastes like an orange."

Kyrano ignored the jibe, and took the other half of the orange, placing it on the juicer. He skillfully twisted the fruit until the bottom half of the glass was filled with juice. He handed it to Alan and nodded.

Alan sighed and drank it down. "And that would be orange juice. Kyrano, I fail to see where you're going with this."

Kyrano smiled patiently. "You are correct in that the juice is still an orange. It is, only different."

Alan frowned for a moment. Then he looked up at Kyrano. "Are you saying that John is like this...orange?"

Kyrano nodded sagely. "Yes, in a manner of speaking. He is still John, only not a John that you are all used to seeing."

"So I was right, he's _not_ coming back?" Alan's voice held a touch of desperation to it.

Kyrano shook his head. "Only your brother can answer that question. What I am saying is, give John time. Let him see himself through his own eyes before you judge him." With that, Kyrano smiled and left Alan alone with his thoughts.

* * *

John glanced up as the phone rang again. Seeing it was the island, he sighed. "Sorry Virg. Just not in the mood." He muttered under his breath, as continued with his cleaning in the living room.

* * *

Virgil's fingers wandered across the piano keys, as the somber notes of Chopin filled the room. He finished that piece and started another, this time one of his own making. He closed his eyes and lost himself in the music.

The last notes where still echoing in the room, when a voice startled him.

"That was beautiful, Virgil."

His eyes snapped open. "I didn't hear you come in."

Onaha smiled. "I shouldn't think so. You were elsewhere." She placed her dust rag on the end table and walked over to him. "What is troubling you Virgil?"

Virgil sighed and ran a weary hand over his eyes. "Nothing...everything. I feel like I'm being pulled in ten different directions Onaha. Like I'm a guitar string, strung too tight." He sighed. "John won't answer my calls, Gordon's a mess down in the infirmary, Dad's in London...I just can't take much more of this!" He slumped down on the piano, the keys crashing discordantly.

She placed her hands on his shoulders. "Virgil, _kasih_, no one expects you to do everything." She said softly, as she began to massage his tensed muscles.

Virgil snorted. "Yeah right." He sighed. "I'm sorry Onaha, I didn't mean to come down on you."

"There is no need to apologize." She smiled and continued rubbing him. "Tell me about Gordon."

"He's still out of it downstairs. Steve's not worried. He said he talked to Kyrano and that he said Gordon's memory was the hardest to pull. Gordon didn't want to remember." He frowned. "And when he _has_ woken up, Gord's isn't wanting to talk." He sighed again. "Then there's John. Or, I assume there's John. He won't answer the phone. I must have left a dozen messages!" He shook his head. "I wish Dad was here..."

Onaha's heart bled a little. She hated to see any of 'her' boys in pain, whether it be physical or mental. She had hoped that after the events of the past few days, things would begin to turn back to normal. _Obviously not..._ She ran her fingers through Virgil's hair. "Virgil, you must not take this burden yourself."

"There's no one else here Onaha." He sighed wearily and smiled up at her, his tawny eyes clouded. "Thanks for listening. I'll go try John again."

Onaha watched Virgil leave the room, before picking up the dust cloth and going in search of her husband.

* * *

John sat with his chin resting on his hands, staring at the bottle in front of him on the bar. He poured the whiskey into a glass, the amber liquid glowing in the light from the setting sun. He heard the front door open, but didn't move.

"John? Hey, Johnny, you home?" Scott called out. He wandered into the living room. "You finished painting? It looks..." His voice trailed off as he caught sight of his brother. "John?"

John looked up. "Hi Scott." He turned his gaze back to the bottle. "Do you know how badly I want a drink..._Need_ a drink?" He closed his eyes and visibly shook. "I don't think I can do this Scott. I'm not strong enough."

_Time for a little payback, brother mine. _Scott walked up to the bar and pulled another glass out from the cupboard. "Then why fight it?" He poured a generous amount of whiskey for himself, then clinked his glass against John's. "Bottom's up, John." He raised the glass to his lips, then frowned. "C'mon, what are you waiting for? Drink up!"

John watched in disbelief as Scott swallowed the alcohol, then poured himself another. "Scott, w-what..."

"It's your party, John-boy." Scott shrugged. "What's the matter, I thought you liked this stuff?"

John shook his head and pushed the glass away. "Knock it off Scott. You're not funny."

"Wasn't trying to be." He nodded towards John's glass. "Well, you gonna drink that?"

John eyed the glass and took a shuddering breath. "No. NO." He grabbed the glass and the bottle and marched into the kitchen, Scott at his heels. John walked over to the sink and unceremoniously, dumped the contents of the bottle and his glass down the drain. He then slammed them down on the counter, and stood leaning against it, his head down, his body quivering.

"John?" Scott stepped forward and placed his hand on John's shoulder. "You OK?"

"No." He took a deep breath. "But that's my problem." He looked up at Scott, really seeing him for the first time. "You're back in a sling. What did the doc say?"

Scott shrugged, carefully. "No new damage. Mostly bruising and a few glass splinters. She wanted to know what happened, so I kind of hedged the truth. I should be fine in a couple of days."

John looked down at his feet. "I'm sorry Scott."

"Hey, it wasn't entirely your fault bro." Scott sat down at the table. "So, you didn't take a drink..."

John shook his head. "No, not this time."

"This time?"

John sighed and sat down across from his brother. "God Scott. I don't want a drink, I _need_ one! You have no idea how badly I'm dying for one."

"Yes, John, I do." Scott said quietly.

John looked up at hearing the emotion in his brother's tone. "Damn, I'm sorry, Scott." He sighed. "Just one more thing I've screwed up." He got up and paced the room. "I'm starting to think I should have just let Hood finish what he started." He dropped his head and closed his eyes. "That all of you would have been better off without me."

Scott shook his head. "You really don't get it do you?" John looked up at him in surprise. "Do you have any idea what kind of hole you would leave in this family? What kind of hole you already have left?" Scott walked over to his brother. "Look John, I'm not trying to pull a guilt trip on you, God knows you're beating yourself up enough already. I'm just trying to tell you how much we **do** care. Didn't the other night mean anything to you?"

John clenched his hands into fists. "Of course it did."

"Then why do you still not believe us? Believe me! Dammit John!" Scott exploded. "Forget it, just forget it. Wallow in your self pity. I'm done." He stormed out of the room.

John waited a heartbeat, then followed his brother. Scott had gone back into the living room and was standing in front of the bay window, a stony expression on his face. "I don't know what you want from me, Scott! You all tell me to talk about what's bothering me, then when I do, you blast me for it! Well, fuck you!"

They stood glaring at each other for a few moments, until Scott broke into a smile.

"What?" John demanded.

"You. You're still here."

"Of course I'm still here, where would I go?"

Scott shrugged. "Well, for the past six months you've run off every time one of us tried to talk to you."

"That's not true."

Scott arched an eyebrow. "Isn't it John?"

John leveled his icy gaze on his brother. "So you staged all this to try and get me to talk?"

Scott shook his head. "No. I'm mad as hell at you right now, and if I had two good arms, I'd knock you into next week for even _contemplating_ suicide."

"I was—"

"No, you're going to listen to **me** now. I have had it with your self-depreciating attitude. Yes, you've had a hell of an ordeal, but you know what, the rest of us have too. And before you add the 'you weren't attacked' routine, yes John, we were. Maybe not directly, but we were in the thick of things, right next to you." Scott's eyes flashed in anger. "And you were lucky enough to be unconscious through the worst of it. **I** had to watch Virgil working on you, trying to keep you alive. **I** had to see the worry and guilt on Dad's face that he brought this down on us."

Scott's voice was cold as he went on. "Alan's the one who had to deal with the Hood directly. And he almost died because of it. Dad has to live with that knowledge too."

John took a step back at his brother's tone. He tried again to say something, but Scott kept going.

"As to the Hood messing up your head, yeah, I'll give you that one. But John, did you try, _really_ try to get rid of him? I saw your face when he was talking to you. There were times it seemed like he wasn't bothering you as much as we all thought he was."

A red flush creeped up John's face, and he looked away, not knowing what to say.

Scott merely stared at his brother. "So, before you start the next installment of this pity-party, think about us instead of yourself for a change." Without another word, Scott marched past his brother, leaving John to stare after him in stunned silence.


	42. Chapter 42

Sorry for the long wait, but now that the hubby is back, things should move faster. Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to read and/or review. Enjoy!

As usual, I don't own the Thunderbirds or it's characters, just the ones I made up.

* * *

The blaring of the alarm klaxon woke Virgil from a sound sleep. Rolling off the bed, he quickly pulled on a pair of shorts and a shirt, and bolted out the door.

He ran into both Alan and Gordon out in the hallway. "Whatssup?" Alan asked sleepily.

Gordon shook his head. "Beats me, let's go." They ran down the steps to the office. Fermat had beaten them there, and had already transformed it into the Command Control Center. Steve joined them a few moments later, followed quickly by the Belagant family.

"What do we have, Fermat?" Virgil asked.

The young man looked up from the computer. "D-Dad received a call from a cruise ship. They're caught in a s-s-s-hurricane off of Cape C-Cod."

Brains's image appeared on the screen. The scientist/engineer was currently doing a rotation on board Thunderbird Five. _"There's a s-small ship caught in the hurricane. The captain reported that th-they are taking on w-w-w-H2O."_

Virgil frowned. "Where's the Coast Guard?"

"_Due to the intensity of the s-storm, they are unable to r-r-respond. Most of the ships are still d-d-docked in Fall River."_ Brains paused. _"Are we g-g-going?"_

Virgil sighed. "I don't see how we can."

Alan looked up. "What if we call Scott and John?" He asked quietly.

Gordon's head snapped up, but he didn't say a word, just watched his older brother intently.

Virgil shook his head. "There's no way Scott could fly, not with that shoulder. And as for John..." His voice trailed off.

"_They're w-w-waiting for our answer, Virgil."_ Brains interjected.

Virgil looked up to see everyone staring at him. "Why is everyone looking at me?" He snapped.

Gordon folded his hands across his chest. "Why? Because, Virgil, **you're** the one in charge." There was a touch of anger in his voice.

Virgil turned away, muttering something under his breath. He fisted a hand in his hair and sighed. "And how do you propose we do this?" He asked without turning around.

"I-I-I'll stay and man base." Fermat said instantly.

"And I'll help." Tin-Tin added.

Alan nodded. "That leaves you, me, Gordon and Steve. We can do it."

Virgil turned back, his expression unreadable. "Brains, how many on the ship?"

"_The c-c-captain reports 63 p-passengers and 12 crew."_

Virgil clenched his eyes shut. "Tell them we're coming. And get Scott on the phone, let him know what's going on." He opened his eyes and smiled grimly. "Thunderbirds are go."

* * *

Scott stood in front of the big bay window, watching the storm. The rain was so thick, he could barely make out the park across the street, even with the frequent lightning illuminating everything. _Haven't watched a storm like this in a long time. _Another flash, only this one was accompanied by a thunderclap that shook the house. _I'm surprised John is still upstairs. This is a doozy._

As if on cue, Scott heard the pounding of his brother flying down the stairs. John burst into the living room, just as the lightning flashed again, this time sending the house into darkness. The loud crash that followed it made the windows rattle.

"S-S-Scott?" John called out, his voice catching in his throat.

"Easy bro, it's just the power. Bet that last strike took out a transformer. Even the streetlights are out. We'll just get the generator started." Scott replied easily.

"G-Generator...right." John took a deep breath. Again, thunder boomed and John moved instinctively closer to Scott. "God, I'm a wuss." He muttered to himself.

Scott laughed. "That you are, brother mine!" Scott draped an arm around John's shoulders. "But I'm here to protect you."

"Great, thanks."

Scott laughed again. "You'll be fine. C'mon, let's get to that generator."

"_**DUM-DEE-DEE-DUM."**_

Scott's hand went instantly to his pocket and he pulled out his phone. There was only one reason why it would ring that particular tune. "Op One here, what's the situation?"

John hid a smile. Scott was sounding more like their father everyday. His smile faded as he saw Scott frown.

"No way. Virgil, you cannot respond to this." Scott said firmly. He shook his head. "I said no...Virgil, wait!...Virgil!! Dammit!" Scowling, Scott closed his phone.

"What's wrong?" John asked.

Scott glanced up at John. "Cruise ship in trouble off of Cape Cod. They're going."

"Who's going?" John frowned. Then his head snapped up. "No! They can't do it themselves! Look at it out there!"

Scott nodded. "I think we'd better let Dad know what's going on, and get in on this action ourselves."

John followed Scott out of the room, as thunder once again crashed overhead. _I'm not afraid, I just want to see what's going on._ He flinched as the wind lashed rain against the windows. _Yeah, right..._ "Scott! Wait!"

Scott paused a moment, letting his brother catch up. "Let's get the generator going first." He paused to grab a flashlight from the kitchen, then started down the cellar stairs, John at his heels.

He grinned as John flinched from another thunderclap. "You know, you could just move down here. So the big, bad, thunderstorms can't find you." He teased.

John glared. "Bite me." The he grinned. "Wonder if the mouse traps I put down here have caught anything yet..." He mused.

Scott froze. "What mouse traps?"

John patted Scott's good shoulder. "Don't worry, big guy. I've got your back."

"Very funny." They both stopped in front of the generator.

"You hold the light, I'll get her started." John knelt down and flipped a few switches, then he pulled the choke. Nothing happened. He pulled it again. It started, then stalled. John muttered a few choice words under his breath, then pulled again. This time the engine caught. A moment later, the lights flickered. They died, then came on full, making them both blink in the sudden brightness. "That takes care of that." John said, brushing the dirt off his hands onto his pants.

Scott nodded thoughtfully. "Let's call Virg." He and John walked over to a dark corner of the cellar.

"I'll do it. I changed the pass-codes." John pushed what looked like a knot in the wood, and a hand scanner popped out. He pressed his hand to it.

"_**Fingerprints confirmed. Voice identification required."**_

John sighed. "To infinity, and beyond." He avoided looking at his older brother.

"_**Voice identification recognized. Welcome, John."**_

A cleverly concealed door opened in the wall, and John and Scott stepped inside. The room was a much smaller version of the Command-Control center on Tracy Island. A highly sophisticated computer sat on a desk, and one wall was nothing more than a giant screen. John nudged Scott forward. "I'm not running that thing. Not in this storm."

"Wimp." Scott sat down, then gave his brother a wry look. "To infinity, and beyond?"

"Shut up Scott."

Laughing, Scott turned to the computer and one handed, punched in a few commands. "Brownstone One to Thunderbird Two." The screen lit up and Virgil's face appeared.

"_This is Thunderbird Two."_

"What's your ETA?" Scott asked. Behind him, John groaned.

"_Roughly 48 minutes."_

"Who's with you?" Scott demanded.

"_Myself, Op Four, Mac, and...Op A."_

"Op A?" John mouthed.

Scott bit back a chuckle. "Confirmed, Thunderbird Two. Please stand-by." He turned to John. "There's no way they can pull this off alone. The winds alone will be a challenge, let alone pulling seventy people from a sinking ship."

"What are you saying, Scott?" John asked carefully.

Scott took a deep breath. "We have to go, John."

"No." John shook his head. "No, I can't. Scott, I can't!" He turned away, pacing the length of the short room.

Scott didn't say a word, just watched. Finally, John ran a hand through his hair, fisting it at the back of his neck. "I'm afraid, Scott." He said quietly.

Now Scott got up and walked over to his brother. "John, we're all afraid." John looked up, his face pale. "But you're not alone, John. You'll never be alone." Scott's grey eyes bored into John's blue ones. "I promise."

John swallowed thickly and taking a deep breath, nodded. Scott smiled. "Good man." He turned back to the computer. "Op Two, you'll be making an unscheduled stop to pick us up."

Virgil shook his head. _"Negative, Op One. You are not cleared for duty."_

"Do I have to get the big guy in on this?" Scott asked archly.

There was a short pause. _"And just where am I supposed to pick you up?" _Virgil retorted hotly. _"Never mind, I know just the place. I'll have Base send you the coordinates. Just don't be late. Thunderbird Two, out."_ Virgil's face disappeared from the screen.

John looked over at Scott. "I don't like the sound of that..."

"Me either." Scott sighed. "Better let Dad know what's going on."

"_I already know."_

Both men jumped as their father's image appeared on the screen. "Um...Hi Commander." Scott smiled warily.

Jeff frowned. _"And just what do you two think you're doing?"_

"Going on the mission, sir." Scott replied instantly. He sighed and glanced over at the monitors, assuring himself that the transmission was secure. "Look, Dad, you know they can't do this alone. It's going to take two of them to hold Two steady in these winds, then another two if not three to get the victims off the ship. We **have** to go."

Jeff shifted his gaze to his second son. _"John, what do you have to say?"_

John took a deep breath. "I agree with Scott. They need the help." He said quietly.

"_I see."_ Jeff leaned closer to the screen. _"Scott, under no condition are you to participate physically in this rescue. Man Mobile Control, issue orders, count the rain drops, anything but hands on. Is that understood?" _Jeff's voice was hard as steel.

Scott nodded. "Yes, sir."

"_As for you, John...just be careful, all right?"_

John also nodded. "I will, Dad."

"_Then move out. And keep me informed."_

"FAB." Both answered together, as they watched Jeff's face fade from the screen.

Scott turned to his brother. "Well, that went better than I expected." He frowned at John. "You ready for this?"

"Like I have any choice." John sighed. "Let's go, before I lose my nerve."

* * *

"I can't believe _this_ is where he chose to land." John took a step back as lightning flashed. "He so much as bends even one blade of grass, and I'll kill him."

Scott chuckled as he peered out across the field. "Told you holding stock in the Red Sox would be worth it."

"Right. You knew that one day, we'd have to land Thunderbird 2 in the middle of Fenway Park." John muttered sarcastically. He moved farther back into the dugout as another thunderclap roared around them. "Dammit, where is he?"

Scott laughed again, then looked up as the familiar sound of Thunderbird Two's engines were heard over the storm. They both shielded their eyes as the giant ship slowly lowered to the ground. Before the ramp had fully opened, John and Scott were running through the rain, trying to get aboard.

Once inside, John hit the controls to close up the ramp and was shaking the water from his hair when Alan walked in. "Hey Scott!" He paused. "H-Hi John..."

John looked up and smiled. Alan had shot up inches since he'd seen him last. Alan stood watching his older brother warily, making John cringe inside. "Hi there, Sprout." He called out softly.

Alan smiled tentatively. "You...you look good."

"Thanks."

Scott stepped forward. "What's our ETA to the accident zone?"

Alan rolled his eyes, and John chuckled. "Some things never change." He said, winking at Alan.

Alan laughed, then turned to face a frowning Scott. "Virg says about 10 minutes. Depends on the winds."

"I'd better go up and see him." Scott started forward then turned. "John?"

John looked up. "I'm going to get changed, I'll be there in a few." Scott nodded and disappeared. John made his way to the locker room, and pulled his jumpsuit out of a closet. Pulling it on, he noticed Alan in the doorway. "Something bothering you Sprout?"

Alan shrugged. "Not really." He fumbled in his pocket for something. "Here, Tin-Tin wanted me to give this to you." He handed John a crumpled envelope.

"What's this?"

"I can guess." Alan said cryptically. "I'll see you on the bridge." Alan turned to leave, then spun back and threw himself into his brother's arms. "I'm glad you're back." He whispered hoarsely, then rushed from the room.

John watched him go, an expression of stunned surprise on his face. Then, shaking his head, he sat down on the bench and opened his envelope. A silver chain fell into his hands. Attached to the chain was a small oval stone. The stone was a milky color, swirls of white and grey making it opaque. Puzzled, he pulled out the note.

_**Dear John,**_

_**Please take this and wear it. It is a moonstone. It is said to be able to help the wearer achieve inner balance and promote new beginnings. It is a stone of protection and emotion, both earthly and lunar. My father says it will keep you safe.**_

_**Tin-Tin**_

John turned the stone over in his hand, looking at it. Sighing, he placed the chain around his neck and closed his eyes. He didn't know whether it was psychological or not, but he felt peace settle over him. Smiling, he opened his eyes and made his way to the bridge.

"I don't care what Dad said! He's not here! This is my command!" Virgil's voice carried across the room.

John took a deep breath and stepped onto the bridge. Gordon sat in the pilot's seat, Alan was at navigation, Steve sat in the passenger jump-seat, and Virgil was standing toe to toe with Scott, his face red with anger. "Hey there." John said cautiously.

Five heads snapped up. Steve nodded his head and smiled softly. Alan sent John a grin and a wink. Gordon merely frowned and turned back to the controls. John sighed and turned towards his middle brother. "Virgil, what's going on?"

Virgil ran a hand through his usually perfect hair. "John, how are you?"

John took a few steps closer. "I'm fine. You?"

"Just peachy." Vigil sighed. "Look, I know you two want to help, but frankly..."

"We're a liability." A tiny part of John felt happy at seeing Gordon wince, but he went on. "Virgil, I don't blame you for thinking that way but you have to know that we can't do this alone. You need our help."

"Your _help?_ Dammit, John! What are you going to do to help?!" Virgil exploded, his temper finally getting the best of him. "Scott, you can't do a thing with that shoulder, and John, what's to say you're not going to freak out on us again?!"

John went pale and clenched his jaw against a retort. Scott gave Vigil a light shove. "Watch it. That was uncalled for." Scott growled.

"Oh please, deny that you're thinking the same thing!" Vigil snapped back.

"Umm guys, I hate to interrupt, but we're just about at the accident zone." Gordon spoke for the first time.

Virgil marched over to the console and looked at the screen a few moments. Then he straightened and turned to his brothers. "Scott, you will sit here in the navigation seat and watch. You will **not** take an active part in this mission, is that clear?" Virgil's tone booked no argument.

Scott narrowed his eyes at his brother's tone, but nodded. "FAB."

Virgil turned to John. "You, pilot her. Nothing fancy. You know the computers will compensate for just about anything. Just keep her in line." John merely nodded. Virgil shifted his gaze to the others. "Steve, head down to the pod bay. Get ready for the victims. We're going to have to load them there until we reach the mainland. Alan, Gordon, let's see if the Rescue Platform will hold in this weather. If not, we need to come up with a better plan. Let's move." Without another word, Virgil spun on his heel and was out the door. Steve followed close behind.

Gordon got up and let John take the controls without speaking to him. Scott rolled his eyes and sighed.

"You know what his problem is?"

The three of them turned to look at Alan. "Who's problem?" Scott asked.

"Virgil. He needs to get laid." Alan spoke matter of factly. He stared at his brother's stunned expressions. "What? It certainly improved John's disposition." Alan then vanished out the door, leaving his older brothers to stare after him.

"I think we need to keep a closer watch on him and Tin-Tin. Later." With a wave, Gordon followed Alan out the door.

Scott sighed as he sat down at the navigations console. "Man, now I know how Dad feels."

"You? That was _me_ he back-hand complimented." John took his seat and ran his hands over the controls. He flinched as a lightning bolt flashed in the distance. "Storm is moving in again. We'll be lucky to get through this before it really gets close."

Scott noticed the tremor in John's voice, but saw his hands remained steady at the controls. Scott smiled with pride. _We've made it. Whatever happens here can't be any worse than what we've already been through. _He glanced over at his brother again. _This is just what John needs. A chance to do some hands on again. It's good to have him back._

* * *

Virgil and Gordon peered down the hatch-way at the swirling maelstrom below. Gordon shook his head. "There's no way we're going to be able to use the Rescue Platform! The winds are just too bad!" He shouted over the wind.

Virgil nodded. "I agree! But the alternative..." He keyed the hatch closed.

"We've got no choice, Gus. We have to use the harnesses."

Virgil closed his eyes a moment, then nodded again. "Go get suited up. You and Alan. I'll stay and keep an eye on the controls. Alan hasn't trained on them yet."

"FAB." Gordon hurried over to the supply locker, grabbing Alan's arm on the way. He quickly outlined the plan to his younger brother.

Alan had already dressed himself in his turquoise edged jumpsuit. "So, what other equipment do we need?" He asked.

Gordon smiled proudly. _He's one of us._ "Helmets of course, and this." He rummaged in the locker and handed Alan a small packet. "Open it and put it on."

Alan looked dubiously at the packet in his hand. Shaking his head, he pulled on the string. Instantly, the packet transformed into a silver vest. "What is this thing?"

"Believe it or not, a life vest. If you end up in the drink, pull this..." Gordon indicated a small flap on his own vest. "The whole thing inflates. I helped Brains test it, so I can guarantee it works."

Alan put the vest over his uniform and tied the straps. The vest fit snuggly, but not too tight and there were no loose edges to catch on anything. "If you say so..."

"Trust me."

"Yeah, like _that_ makes me feel any better." Alan muttered as they walked back to where Virgil was standing.

"FAB, Scott, I'll let them know." Virgil looked up as they walked over. He waved to Steve and then spoke. "Scott's been in touch with the ship's captain. The ship is taking on water, not at an alarming rate, but enough so that the pumps can't keep up. There's no way we can tow the ship back to shore before it sinks."

"So, we have to evacuate then." Alan said.

Virgil nodded. "And to add to it, the captain mentioned that one passenger has had a heart attack. He's conscious for the moment, but they did have to de-fib him earlier." He handed Alan and Gordon each a harness. "We'll lower you down from here. I'll send the basket down as soon as you two hit the deck."

"FAB." Gordon slipped on the harness and clipped the cable to it. He grabbed his helmet, then sent a glance in Alan's direction. "You OK there, Sprout?"

Alan looked up, his face pale. "Yeah, I'll be fine." He glanced down as Virgil opened the hatch again. "It's not like the training stuff, is it?"

"No, it's not." Gordon placed a hand on his arm. "If you're not up to it, just say so. Virg can go down instead."

Alan shook his head. "No. I can do this." He took a deep breath, then put his helmet on. "Let's move."

A few moments later, Gordon and Alan were repelling out into the storm.

* * *

Jeff paced the length of Penny's sitting room and mentally cursed himself for the hundredth time. _I never thought we'd need a communications array here. Well, that's going to change. I'm blind and deaf to what's going on! _He sighed.

"Jeff?" He looked up as Penny stepped into the room. She was dressed head to toe in pink, as usual. "Darling, relax. They're fine."

Jeff shook his head. "I hate this. I hate not knowing what's happening."

She placed a hand on his arm. "I know."

Jeff smiled and pulled her close. "If I had to be stuck here, I'm glad it's with you."

"Stuck here? I hadn't realized being with me was such a hardship." Penny teased.

"Well, it's no tropical island, but I'll manage." He pulled her lips to hers.

"Ahem. Tea, my Lady?"

They both laughed. "Impeccable timing, as usual, Parker." Penny smiled.

"Thank-you, my Lady." Parker pushed the tea cart towards the couch and poured Penny a cup of tea.

"Mr. Tracy?" Parker called out, holding another cup in his hands.

Jeff shook his head. "No offense, Parker, but if I have to drink another cup of tea...I'd settle for something a little stronger."

Parker smiled. "I know just the thing, sir. Be with you in a moment." He nodded to Penny and hurried from the room.

Jeff paced the room again. "Jeff, you're wearing a hole in the rug."

He stopped in front of the window. "Did I mention how much I hate this?"

"You may have." She placed her cup on the coffee table and walked over, slipping her arm around his waist. "They'll be fine, Jeff. You know they will."

"Scott's with them. And John."

Penny looked up, her eyes wide. "What? Why?"

Jeff shook his head. "There was no other option. Either they went or they refused the mission." He sighed. "Scott will be fine. It's John I'm worried about."

She snuggled closer, and Jeff wrapped his arms around her. "He'll be all right, Jeff. He's strong, and he has all his brothers around him. They won't let anything happen to him. Even Gordon." At Jeff's doubtful glance, she shook her head. "You know as well as I do that no matter how angry Gordon is, he'll keep an eye on John."

"You're right."

"I always am."

"Brat." Jeff said, kissing her lightly. He turned and looked out the window again. _I just wish they'd call..._

* * *

John gritted his teeth as Thunderbird Two rocked against the wind. "Dammit..." He tightened his grip on the controls, thankful for the fact that most of the ship was run by the computer. He just had to keep her steady. _Yeah, easier said than done,_ he thought to himself as a bright flash of lightning stuck close. "Scott! How much longer?"

Scott keyed a switch. "Op One to Op Two. What's your situation?"

"_We've got the injured and all the children aboard. It's slow going, we're only able to winch five up at a time. Mac's taking care of the injured in the sick bay. I'm guessing we're about halfway done. Maybe twenty-five or thirty more."_

"FAB." Scott turned to John. "We're talking at least another forty-five minutes or so. You holding up OK?"

John nodded. "Call Five, I want the specs on this storm."

"On it. Thunderbird Two calling Thunderbird Five."

"_Go ahead, T-T-Two."_ Brains answered immediately.

"What can you tell us about this storm?"

"_It s-s-seems to be moving north-east at r-r-roughly fifteen miles an hour. The c-c-frigid water and an approaching cold f-f-front are weakening it."_

"Thank-God for small favors..." John muttered under his breath, as another bolt of lightning flashed in front of him.

Scott bit back a laugh. "Thanks Thunderbird Five."

"_FAB."_

Scott turned to John. "We're almost done, bro. Shouldn't be too—"

"_Alan! Gordon!! What the hell just happened?!"_

Scott and John turned as one, to face the com-screen. "Virgil? What's going on down there?" Scott demanded.

"_I don't know!! I lost contact with them!"_ There was an uncharacteristic edge of panic in Virgil's voice.

John stood quickly. "Take her."

Without a moment's hesitation, Scott put his hands on the controls. "Got her. Go."

John bolted out the door and down the steps to the pod bay. It was filled with people, most sitting down huddled under blankets. Steve was no where to be seen, but remembering the heart attack victim, John figured he was in sick bay. One little girl smiled and waved shyly. John waved back. He made his way through the crowd, nodding and offering brief words of support. He paused in front of one of the storage lockers and pulled out a life vest, then went in search of his brother.

Virgil looked up as John approached. "That last bolt managed to short out the com somehow. I can't raise either of them, and the cable's gone slack."

John had already put on a life vest and was pulling on a harness. "Keep trying." He was attaching one of the cables when Virgil grabbed his arm.

"What do you think you're going?" His younger brother demanded.

"Where do you think?" John said, fastening the clip to his vest.

Virgil shook his head. "No. You can't go."

"I have to, Virgil. Scott's got Two. You're med trained, I'm not. I'm the logical one to go."

"That's not the point, John! Look, you've been through alot the past couple of months. I don't think this is the time to be trying to prove something to us."

John's blue eyes flashed fire. "I'm not trying to prove anything."

"Dammit, John! There's a hurricane out there!" Virgil tried another tack.

John met his gaze fearlessly. "And our brothers are out there in it." He put a helmet over his head and without another word, strode over to the hatch. Taking a deep breath, John stepped off the deck into the storm.


	43. Chapter 43

I don't own the Thunderbirds or the characters, just the ones I made up. Enjoy!

* * *

Virgil peered down, trying to get a glimpse of his brother. Shaking his head, he glanced around at the people scattered around the pod bay. He pressed a button on his communicator, and spoke into the microphone. "Mac, can you come out and give me a hand here? We've got to get these people organized."

"_Give me a minute. I've just about got this guy stabilized."_

"FAB." Virgil moved over to where a large group of people were standing. He cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted over the din. "Excuse me! Excuse me!!" The talked quieted down as everyone turned to look at him. "I need everyone to move back, keep this area clear. We have more people to bring up and need the space. As soon as we get them up, we'll be able to get out of here. Thank-you for your cooperation." He started herding people towards the edges of the ship.

Steve appeared a few moments later, and began to help. Virgil asked about the heart attack victim. "He's fine for now, but we need to get to a hospital sooner rather than later. Anything from the others?" Steve asked.

Virgil shook his head. "Nothing. John went down after them."

"John?" Steve's eyes grew wide. "That's not good, Virgil. He may not be ready for this."

"I know."

"I'm guessing Scott knows what happened." Steve frowned as Virgil shook his head. "I've got things here, go let him know what's going on.

Virgil walked back to the hatch, then took a deep breath. "Op Two to Op One."

"_Go ahead."_

"We lost contact with the others...Op Five has gone down after them." Virgil braced himself for the inevitable explosion. He didn't have to wait long.

"_WHAT? You let him go out there? Are you out of your God-damned mind?!"_

Virgil turned and lowered his voice. "I had no choice, Scott. He—"

Scott interrupted him. _"No choice? YOU could have gone down instead! He's not ready for this!"_

"You think I don't know that?!" Virgil hissed. "He slapped a harness on and was down the hole before I could react, what did you expect me to do?"

"_You could have done something! What if Hood attacks him again? Did you ever think of that?"_

"Don't you put this on me, Scott! John's a big boy. If he thinks he can do this—"

"_That's just it, Virgil! We don't know if he can!"_

"_Par-par-excuse me..."_ Brains voice cut in on their conversation. _"I would s-suggest that you t-t-two save your disagreement for later. Now is n-n-**not** the time."_

Both Virgil and Scott fell silent. "You're right, Brains."

"_Sorry, Brains."_ Scott added sheepishly.

"_Th-Thank-you. The storm is still moving n-north. The cold water will start to w-weaken it, but that is still h-h-hours away. It is going to get w-w-worse before it gets better. H-How much longer until you wrap things up?"_

"I don't know." Virgil pinched the bridge of his nose. "We've lost contact with Gordon and Alan. I don't know if they're hurt or if that last lightning flash screwed up the com-link."

"_L-L-Let me check..."_ Brains was quiet a few moments. _"It appears that you are cor-cor-right, Virgil. I'll see if I can re-route and try to c-c-contact them from here."_

"Thanks, Brains." Virgil sighed as he looked down the hatch. _Please, one of you, answer..._

* * *

John gripped tightly to the safety cable, and tried not to notice the lightning flashing all around him. He clenched his eyes shut as one bolt came a little too close, nearly striking Thunderbird Two. Finally, after what seemed an eternity, he felt his feet hit the deck of the cruise ship. He opened his eyes and glanced around. Spying a set of cables attacked to the deck rail, he quickly unclipped and went in search of his brothers.

"Hey! Hey, you! Over here!"

John turned at the voice and saw a man waving frantically from the stern. He headed in that direction, his feet sliding on the rolling deck.

"We thought you'd forgotten us!" The man yelled over the noise of the storm. "In here!"

John quickly followed the man into the glass lined helm. He pulled his helmet off and seeing his brothers on the floor, he bolted to their side. "What happened?!"

Gordon looked up from where he was kneeling next to Alan. "Big, big wave tossed us around. Alan got thrown pretty badly. His leg's broken. I'm not sure about any other injuries."

John nodded. "Hey there, Sprout, let's take a look at you." He looked down at his youngest brother and winced in sympathy. Alan's left leg was definitely broken. It was bent at an unnatural angle between the knee and ankle. Alan's face was grey, and his breathing was ragged. John looked up at Gordon. "We need to get him out of here." He said softly, his voice urgent.

"I know. Communications are down. I lost TB Two just as this happened." Gordon replied, running his hand over his head.

John nodded, then spoke into the microphone connected to his collar. "Op Five to Thunderbird Two, can you hear me?...Virgil, come in! Still nothing." John shook his head. "We're on our own. We have to get him back to Two."

"I'll go find the basket. Stay with him." Gordon pulled his helmet on and rushed outside.

John put his hand on Alan's shoulder. "Alan? Hey, Al."

Alan's eyes fluttered open. "J-John?"

John smiled. "I'm here, Sprout. We're going to get you out of here. Just relax."

Alan's blue eyes filled with tears. "It hurts, John...it hurts..."

John took his hand and held it tightly. "I know it does. Just hang on." John forced a smile. "Gordon will be back in a minute and we'll get you home."

Alan nodded and his eyes closed. John watched him a moment, then looked up. Several people, some dressed in the uniform of the cruise line, were all gathered around him. John got to his feet. "Is everyone here?"

An older man stepped forward. "We're the last. There's thirty-seven of us left. The injured and women and children went first. I'm Michael Crane, Captain of this ship." He held out his hand and John shook it. He nodded down at Alan. "You need to get him back to your plane, fast."

"_Plane?" Vigil would have a stroke._ John nodded. "My other colleague has gone to get the rescue basket. We've lost radio contact with the ship, so I'm going to need everyone to do what I ask. Captain, what is your ship's status?"

"She's got a heavy list to starboard. At the rate she's taking water, I estimate we have less than an hour before she goes down."

_Thirty-seven, _John did some quick mental calculating in his head,_ this is going to be close..._. "OK, wait here a minute. I'm going to find my colleague." He looked down at Alan. "Please, take care of him, I'll be right back."

John pulled his helmet on and stepped back out into the storm. Looking up he could barely make out the lights from Thunderbird Two. _Thank-God Scott has her now. There's no way I could have held her this steady._ A sudden movement caught his eye and he hurried over in that direction.

Gordon was struggling with the heavy rescue basket and John quickly grabbed the other end. Together they wrestled it back inside. They paused for a moment inside the doorway. "Anything from above?" Gordon asked.

John shook his head. "Nothing. I'm guessing a lightning strike took out the short range communications array."

Gordon looked mystified. "I thought we had protections in place for that?"

"We do. I'll bet it was damaged when you guys got zapped in LA a few weeks ago, and no one thought to check."

"Terrific." Gordon muttered. They set the basket down near Alan. "Hey, Al. How're you doing?"

Alan's eyes fluttered. "Just...want to...go home..."

"We're working on it." John ran his hand over Alan's forehead, then looked up at Gordon. "How do you want to do this?"

Gordon looked like he'd been hit with a board. "What?"

"How do you want to do this? This is your show; tell me what you want me to do."

Gordon shook his head, not sure if he had heard right. "I thought...I mean..."

John interrupted him. "You figured I'd come down here and take over." He shook his head, and lowered his voice. "You have way more experience in this sort of thing than I do."

Gordon resisted the urge to pinch himself in case he was dreaming, and nodded. "We need to get Alan out first, then start with the others." He turned and rummaged around in his pack, then pulled out a cervical collar. He carefully placed it around Alan's neck. "Easy there, Sprout. We'll have you out of here in no time."

"T-thanks, Gordon." Alan whispered.

Gordon glanced around and beckoned to some of the crewmen. "Hey! Can you guys give us a hand over here?" Two men hurried over, sliding on the uneven floor. "We're going to lift him into the basket. OK, John, you hold his shoulders, I'll support his leg. You guys each take a side. We'll try to do this as smooth as possible. On my count, one...two...three!"

Together they lifted Alan and quickly moved him to the basket. Alan screamed in pain, and both John and Gordon bit back oaths. John took a shuddering breath and clutched Alan's hand tightly as Gordon strapped him in. Gordon looked up. "He's ready."

"How are we going to notify the others?" John asked.

Gordon's face fell. "Damn...hadn't thought of that."

John looked from the crew to Alan to back up at Gordon. "Gords, we have less than an hour before this ship sinks."

"I know!!" Gordon ran his hand over his head. "I don't know what to do, John!" He said quietly.

John placed his hand on Gordon's arm. "We'll figure something out."

Before Gordon could reply, they both heard a crackle come from Gordon's wristband. _"Th-Th-Thunderbird Five to Op Four...Can you h-hear me?"_

"Brains! Reading you loud and clear, Thunderbird Five." Gordon answered promptly.

"_W-What is your situation?"_

"Op A is injured and needs immediate medical treatment. The boat is taking on water faster than we anticipated and we need to get the rest of the passengers off. And to add to our problems, we can't reach Thunderbird Two." Gordon told him.

"_Is Op A re-re-secure for transport?"_

"Yes."

"_I'll notify Thunderbird Two. Stand by."_

Gordon let out a sigh of relief. "He's going to let the other's know what's going on."

"Told you we'd figure it out." John smiled.

"Yeah, yeah..." Gordon turned to Alan. "Ready, Alan?" Alan's eyes fluttered, but he didn't reply. Gordon scowled as he pulled his helmet on. "Op Four to Thunderbird Five."

"_Th-Thunderbird Five here. They're waiting for you a-above."_ Brains answered.

"FAB. Let's move, John."

John pulled on his own helmet and together, he and Gordon carried the rescue basket out into the storm. A few of the crewmen followed. The lightning was still flashing and the boat tossed wildly from side to side. John noticed that the angle was steeper then when he first came aboard. They made their way over to the railing and quickly attached the basket to the cables. "We can take two more people, plus you." John said to Gordon.

Gordon shook his head. "Oh no, I'm staying here."

"Gordon don't fight me on this. Get Alan up there, then hurry back down with more cables. I'll get the rest of the passengers ready and we can start moving them as soon as you get back down."

"No. You're going up. You said it yourself, **I'm** in charge." Gordon persisted.

John grabbed his arm. "Look, you want me to come right out and say it, fine. I am not going back up that damned cable in this weather until it's time to head back." He snapped. "Now move your ass, Alan needs treatment."

Without another word, Gordon turned back to the cables and quickly attached one to his vest. He watched as John fitted the harnesses on the two men, then checking Alan once more, told Brains to pull them up.

A few moments later, the cables went taut and John watched his brothers and the passengers move slowly upward towards Thunderbird Two. The lightning illuminated the air around them and he winced, crouching down on the balls of his feet.

John peered up through the rain, until he saw the brief flash of light which meant the hatch had opened and the others were inside. He hurried back to the main cabin. "We're going to be able to move you up five at a time. I need you all to cooperate and we'll get this done as fast as we can." John quickly separated the men into seven groups. "My colleague will be back shortly, until then, just hang on."

John turned away from them and spoke into his microphone. "Brains? What's going on with the communications systems?" He asked quietly.

"_I'm not s-s-sure. I've run a d-d-diagnostic and can't find the problem!" _Brains sounded exasperated.

John closed his eyes, visualizing the computers up on Thunderbird Five. "Did you try to re-route through the central core system?"

"_Yes. It d-didn't work."_

"What about readjusting the power feed?"

"_Still nothing."_

"It's the guidance processor, Brains, you know it is."

There was a few seconds of silence. _"You're r-r-correct. I believe it was damaged more than I thought during the last rescue." _Brains sounded subdued.

"Don't blame yourself. Shit happens, trust me." John got a tired sounding chuckle from Brains. He took a deep breath. "Try adjusting the feed through a satellite. Piggy-back the signal. If you send it directly to the radio receiver, rather than through our own security systems, it should work." He lowered his voice. "Use the USAF satellite. Type in this code..." John rattled off a series of numbers. "It'll blend into their signal and they won't be able to hear or trace us."

Brains was quiet a few moments. _"I don't understand...h-how do you know that?"_

John blushed, though no one could see him. "It gets boring up there some days. I had to find something to do."

"_I s-see."_ Brains replied, though it was clear he didn't.

"Look, just trust me."

Long moments went by and John began to get fidgety. _C'mon Brains..._

"_Thunderbird Two to Op Five. John, can you read me?"_

"Scott!"

"_I'll take that as a 'yes.' What do you think you're doing down there?"_ Scott's voice held more than a touch of anger to it.

John sighed. "Now's not the time, Scott. We need to get these guys up. Where's Gordon."

"_He's on his way back down now." _There was a short pause. _"And we **will** be discussing this on the way home."_

"FAB." John said resignedly. He looked up as Gordon came in the door. "Gordon's here, I'll check in later. Op Five, out." He made his way to his brother's side. "Alan all set?"

Gordon nodded. "Steve's working on him." He gave John a baleful glance through the helmet visor. "Seems you've pissed everyone off by coming down here." He drawled.

"Back off Gordon." John growled. "We have a job to do."

Gordon held up his hands. "Just thought I'd mention it." He took his helmet off and surveyed the crowd. "We have six harnesses to bring you up. Please stay in your groups as we load you up. I promise we'll get you out of here as soon as possible."

The captain stepped forward. "I'll go last. Get the others off first."

Gordon nodded. "Yes, sir." He beckoned to the group closest to the door. "Let's go. We don't have much time." He and John led them outside and fastened them into the harnesses. "Bring 'em up, Virg." Gordon called.

A few moments later, the men began the trek upward. Seeing his brother flinch during a flash of lightning, Gordon turned to John, "You go back in and get the next bunch ready. I'll take care of things here."

John nodded and disappeared inside. The pattern continued over the next forty-five minutes. As soon as one group went up, John readied the next. Soon there were only himself, Gordon and the captain left. By now the deck was tilted crazily, the starboard railing nearly completely under water. Captain Crane took one last look at his ship, then fastened the harness around his chest. Gordon and John quickly snapped into theirs. "We're done here, Virg. Get us up." Gordon commanded.

"_FAB."_

With a slight jerk, the three men began their ascent into the air. John clenched his eyes shut. _Thank-God we're done. I don't think I can take much more of this._ Suddenly when they were a little more than halfway up, they stopped.

"Virgil, what's going on?" Gordon asked.

"_I don't know! The winch is still turning! Are you guys stuck on something?"_

Both Gordon and John twisted in the air, looking down at the sinking ship. "There!" John pointed. Gordon followed his finger. The cable was hanging off the side of the ship, hooked on what, they couldn't see. "Pull, Virg! Maybe it'll come loose!" They moved upwards a few inches, then froze. John could feel how taut the cable had gone.

"_It's no use. Whatever you're snagged on, it's tight."_

"Damn." Gordon muttered under his breath.

"What's happening?" Captain Crane shouted.

"We're stuck on something! They can't pull us up!" Gordon replied.

"Can you cut the cable?"

"No, they're made to be almost unbreakable." John answered, his mind whirling.

"Then how do we free ourselves?" The man asked.

Gordon shook his head. "I don't know!" He turned to his brother. "Any ideas?"

John took a deep breath. "Only one." In one fluid move, he shoved Gordon away from him, then John unclipped his harness.

It took Gordon a moment before he realized what was happening. "John! NOOOO!!!!!" He yelled as he watched his brother drop into the darkness below.


	44. Chapter 44

A big Thank-you to everyone who helped me with this chapter. Grumpy, Convert, Bluegrass, Tikatue, Agent 5...There would have been alot more mayhem without you!

As usual, I don't own 'em, so please don't sue!

* * *

Virgil felt the cable tighten and instantly stopped the winch. He could hear John and Gordon talking about one of the cables being caught. He reversed the winch, hoping that the slack would loosen the snagged cable. He pushed it forward and again it stalled. Muttering under his breath, he let more slack out. "Thunderbird Two to Ops Four and Five. What's the situation down there?" There was no answer. "Terrific...here we go again. Brains?"

"_Here."_

"I've lost contact with the ship again."

"_W-W-Working on it...Try now."_

"Gordon? John? Are you—"

"_Pull us up! Pull us up!!"_ Gordon shouted back.

"I'm trying!" Virgil tried again, and the cables grew taut. He swore softly and once again stopped the mechanism. "What's going on down there?"

"_Just get us up there!"_

Virgil quickly set the winch in motion and this time the cable moved freely. A few moments later, Gordon and Captain Crane were being pulled onto the deck. John was nowhere to be seen. "Where's John?" Virgil demanded.

Gordon pulled off his helmet and looked up at his brother, his brown eyes wide. "He's still on the ship! The cables caught and he went to try and free us."

Virgil frowned. "**I** freed the cables! What are you talking about?"

"John's still down there!!"

"What?" Virgil looked confused.

Gordon grabbed Virgil by the shoulders, ignoring the crowd that had gathered around them. "He jumped, don't you get it?!" He shouted.

Realization dawned. "Brains! Track him!" Virgil ordered.

"_N-N-Negative, Virgil. He never received the m-microchip."_ Brains replied._ "And the c-c-communications are down again. You can t-talk to each other, but once you le-le-exit the ship, you'll lose contact."_

"Son of a..." Virgil ran his hand over his head. "OK, let me think a minute."

"He doesn't have a minute!" Gordon protested.

"_The winds are getting worse. I can't hold her much longer. What's going on down there?" _Scott demanded, interrupting them.

Virgil shut his eyes, his fists clenched at his sides. _I can't do this._

"Virgil! Snap out of it!"

"_Somebody better answer me..."_

"_V-Virgil? I still haven't l-l-located Jo—"_

"SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU!!!" Virgil thundered. Silence echoed throughout the cargo bay. The rescued passengers from the ship along with Gordon, all stared at him in stunned disbelief. Even Brains and Scott were quiet.

Virgil took a deep breath. "Scott, hold her as best as you can. I need to go pick up one more victim."

"_What victim?"_

Virgil didn't answer, but pushed through the crowd, heading towards the lockers. "Brains, work on getting the communications back online. When you reach John, tell him I'm on my way."

"_FAB."_

Gordon followed at his heels. "Virg! Wait!" He grabbed his brother by the shoulder. "Where do you think you're going?"

"After John." Virgil replied, pulling on a life vest.

Gordon shook his head. "No, I'm already wet, I'll go down."

Virgil fixed Gordon with a bland stare. "Haven't you done enough damage?" He said quietly.

Gordon went pale, then red with anger. "Now wait just a second, I—"

"_WHAT VICTIM?!?"_ Scott's shout across the communicator startled them both.

Virgil answered before Gordon could respond. "I'm headed down after John. The cable snagged and he...got stuck down there."

"_Why isn't Gordon going?"_

"Gordon's been out in the wet long enough. We don't need hypothermia on top of everything else." Virgil's amber eyes bored into Gordon's brown ones, almost daring his younger brother to say something. Gordon merely snarled and marched back to the hatch.

"Scott, hold her stead for just a few more minutes. I'll be back with John in a flash."

"_You do that. And when you find John, tell him I'm going to kick his ass for this."_

Virgil smiled. "FAB. Brains, any luck?"

"_N-No, nothing. The storm is interfering t-to much."_

"Keep trying." Virgil took a deep breath, and reaching once more into the locker, took out a tranquilizer gun. He stared at the gun for a moment, then making sure it was loaded and the safety was on, stuffed it into his uniform.

He quickly made his way over to the hatch and peered down at the swirling maelstrom below.

"You sure you don't want me to go?" Gordon asked.

Virgil shook his head. "I'll be fine. Wish me luck."

"You're going to need more than that.

Virgil nodded, then took a deep breath and stepped out into the hurricane to find his brother.

* * *

John landed with a thud. The ship's deck was slick with rain, and tilted at a crazy angle as it slipped further into the sea. He slid across the deck until he reached the railing. A detached part of his mind noticed that the waves were lapping at his feet, but he pushed the thought away and set about freeing the stuck cable. He pulled as hard as he could but it held tight. 

"Virgil! Give me some slack!...Virgil!! Brains!!...Dammit..." John scowled as he realized communications had failed again. He gave the cable another hard tug and was thrown back as it suddenly freed itself and shot upwards. He grabbed at it as it went by, but he only managed to burn the skin off his palms as the cable disappeared above him.

"Shit." John stumbled into the helm house and shivered. His suit was built for warmth, but the constant battering from the wind and rain had penetrated it, and he was feeling the cold. "Op Five to Thunderbird Two? Can you guys hear me?...Brains? Guys?" John sighed as he heard nothing but static across his speakers.

He pulled off his helmet and peered out the windows, trying to see Thunderbird Two. A bolt of lightning flashed close and he backpedaled away from the window. The deck tilted crazily as another wave hit and he dropped to his knees.

"_You are quite alone, John."_

John pressed his hands against his head. "Oh, God no, please..."

* * *

Gordon grabbed Virgil's arm, just before he jumped. "Wait! Brains, say that again!" 

"_I m-managed to partially f-f-repair the communications system."_ The scientist replied.

"Partially?" Virgil asked.

"_You can r-r-receive, but not transmit to each other, or to B-B-Base." _

"So John can't hear us, but we can hear him?" Gordon frowned. "He won't know we're coming after him."

Virgil shrugged his hand arm free. "He will if you'd let me get to him!"

"_Oh, God no, please..." _

Both brother's heads snapped up at the sound of John's voice. "Brains? What was that? What's going on down there?" Virgil demanded.

"_I d-d-don't know!"_ Brains was quiet a few moments. _"I still can't t-t-transmit!"_

"_No! You won't do this to me again!"_ They could all hear the desperation in John's voice.

"I've got to get down there!" Virgil took a deep breath and dropped down the hatch. The wind buffeted at him from all sides, causing him to sway crazily until his feet hit the boat's deck. He slipped and slid on the wet wood, scanning the area for his brother. "John! John, where are you?!?" He continued moving across the deck, finally reaching the helm. He pulled the door open and hurried inside. He noted with concern, the tilt of the deck. _We don't have much time._ "John!!! Answer me!"

A low moan was his only reply, and he spun towards the direction of the sound. Spying a figure on the floor in the far corner, he ran as fast as he could on the wildly tilting deck. "John!"

John looked up as Virgil knelt next to him. "No! Don't come any closer!" He held up his hands as if to ward Virgil off.

Seeing the wild look in John's eyes, Virgil halted. "John, the boat is sinking. We need to get out of here." He said calmly, trying to soothe whatever was bothering his brother.

John shook his head. "I can't go with you."

"John, you have to."

"Don't you see? I don't want to hurt you! Just leave me here!"

There was such anguish in John's voice that it sent a pang through Virgil's heart. "John, you're not going to hurt me." He held out his hand. "Come on, we'll talk once we get back to Two."

John hesitated a moment, then brought one hand to his head and moaned. "No..."

The boat rocked again, causing Virgil to stumble forward. John caught him and the two brothers clung to each other for a moment. Then John tried to push himself away, but Virgil held him tight. "No way, bro. I'm getting you out of here." Virgil's tone was like steel.

John tried to see through the visor of his brother's helmet, but could only see the reflection of his own blue eyes, wide with fear. "I can't Virg...It's better this way." Before Virgil knew what was happening, John threw his hands up and chopped Virgil about the shoulders, dropping his brother to the floor. "I'm sorry." Without a backwards glance, he raced back out into the storm.

* * *

"Oh, no..." 

Fermat looked up. Tin-Tin was frozen in place, her eyes unfocused. "T-Tin-Tin?" He touched her arm. "Tin-Tin, what's w-wrong?"

She shook her head and her eyes cleared. "There's trouble. With John."

Fermat grew pale. "Not the H-H-the H—"

"Yes, my uncle." She closed her eyes again. "His hold is weak, but if John gives into him..."

"Wh-What will happen?"

Tin-Tin opened her eyes and looked over at Fermat. "John will die."

* * *

John squinted through the rain, his thoughts only on getting away from his brother. _I don't want to hurt you, Virgil. And I can't trust myself right now. _He flinched away from the lightning and fell as the deck rolled underneath him. 

"_See, John. I told you."_

"Get out of my head!" John shouted as he staggered to his feet. He slipped again on the wet deck, and grabbed at the railing.

"_Never, John. You're mine now."_

John could hear Hood's evil laughter in his mind. He fumbled to unzip his jumpsuit and found the stone Tin-Tin had given him. He clutched it in his hands and closed his eyes.

"_Don't think that will protect you, John."_

John ignored the voice and tried to keep his thoughts to himself.

"_**John, you beat him once. You can do it again."**_

He was unsurprised when Tin-Tin's voice popped into his head. "No, I can't..." He whispered.

"_**Yes, you can. Trust in yourself."**_

John closed his eyes, trying to ignore the storm thundering around him. _I'm stronger than you are. You can't hurt me. I won't let you._

"John!!" He whirled.

Virgil stood in the doorway of the helm house. His footing was uneven due to the constant rolling of the deck. One hand gripped the doorframe to keep himself steady. But it was the other hand that made John nervous.

"Virgil?" John called out.

Virgil held the gun as steady as he could, despite the wind and rain. "Don't, John. Don't make me do this."

"Virgil, you don—"

John's words were cut off as the boat gave a mighty lurch. Virgil stumbled to his knees and when he looked up, his brother was gone.


	45. Chapter 45

Thanks everyone for your patience! Real life has a way of getting in the way sometimes!

Many thanks to Bluegrass, Agent Five, Grumpy, Convert, and Tiktue for all your help, support and just being there to help me through. Enjoy!

Still don't own 'em, so please don't sue!

* * *

The temperature in Thunderbird Five was set at a constant sixty-eight point seven degrees.

But for Brains, it felt like it was over a hundred. Sweat beaded across his forehead as his fingers flew over the keyboards in front of him. He'd lost all communication with Thunderbird Two again and for the life of him, could not figure out why!

John's last words had indicated he was in serious trouble. Last Brains knew, Virgil had gone down after his brother, but then communications crashed again. He knew the boys were able to hear each other on Thunderbird Two with the internal microphones, but they couldn't reach the ones outside the ship.

Suddenly he froze and stared at the screen, not really seeing it. "The core..." He whispered. He turned to another monitor. "T-Thunderbird F-F-Five to Tracy Island!"

His son's face appeared on the screen. _"G-Go ahead."_

"It's the c-c-core." Brains said.

Fermat looked blank for a moment, then his eyes widened in surprise. _"It makes s-sense! It was corroded when hit with the electrical s-s-surge!"_

Brains nodded. "And there's only o-one way to reset it. And that will just be a t-t-temporary fix."

Fermat went pale. _"A l-l-lightning strike."_ His father nodded. _"But how do we t-t-tell them? We've l-lost all contact now."_

Brains's shoulders slumped in defeat. "I don't kn-kn-know." He sighed heavily. Suddenly his head snapped up and he broke into a wide grin. "I've got it!"

* * *

Scott ignored the throbbing in his shoulder as he struggled to keep Thunderbird Two on course. The big ship could practically fly herself, a point Scott often pointed out to Virgil, but in conditions like this, he didn't trust the computers. The rain was coming down easier now, and Scott figured they were nearing the eye of the storm. He was concerned that he hadn't heard from his brothers or Brains in a while now.

He was pondering how to try and contact them when his pocket buzzed.

"What the..." With one hand on the controls, he fumbled in his jumpsuit until he found his cell phone. He stared at it in confusion for a moment. "Umm...Hello?"

"_S-S-Scott!!"_

"Brains?"

"_S-Scott! You need to mo-mo-relocate Thunderbird Two!"_

"Are you calling me from Five? I didn't know we could do that."

"_SCOTT! In order to get the c-communications back online, you n-need to re-re-shock the system!"_

"And just how am I supposed to do that?" Scott snapped.

"_You have to get s-s-struck by lightning."_

Scott froze, not sure if he had heard correctly.

"_Scott? Scott? Are you s-s-still there?"_

Scott shook his head. "Brains, could you repeat that? I thought you said we need to get struck by lightning."

"_I d-did."_ There was a short pause. _"If you can get a strong enough e-electrical charge, there's a g-g-good chance it will reboot the system." _

Scott closed his eyes. "There's no other way?"

"_No. Don't worry about the ship. S-She'll be fine."_

"It's not the ship I'm worried about." Scott muttered under his breath.

"_Just make s-s-sure you aren't still t-t-tethered to the cruise ship."_

Scott winced, "Yeah, that would be bad." He sighed. "FAB Brains, let me get this going. With any luck you'll hear from us in a few minutes."

"_G-G-Good luck, Scott. Thunderbird Five, out."_

Scott closed the phone and sighed. He flipped a switch on the console. "Mac, you there?"

"_Scott? Everything alright?"_

_Oh yeah, just peachy._ "I need you to go get Gordon and get him up here." Scott took a deep breath. "After he's gone, I want you to release the safety cable and close the hatch."

There was a short pause._ "Scott, you do know that Virgil and John are still down there."_

Scott clenched his eyes shut. "I know. But Brains thinks he's found a way to fix the communications system." He quickly outlined the plan. "There's no way Gordon'll do it, that's why I need him here."

"_FAB. I'll get right on it."_ There was another pause. _"Scott, be careful."_

"Will do." Scott signed off.

A few minutes later, Gordon burst onto the bridge. "Scott? What's wrong?"

Scott shook his head. "Nothing, I need a break."

Gordon frowned as he buckled himself into the co-pilot's chair. "Let me take over then."

"In a sec. Steve?"

"_All set. Go."_

"What's going on—Whoa! Scott! Are you nuts!" Gordon yelped as his brother sent the mighty green ship into a sharp turn. "What are you doing?!"

"We need to get closer to the storm. Brains thinks he and Fermat can get the communications back up if we can erase the core." Scott responded, not taking his eyes off the windshield.

Gordon shook his head. "You're insane. You're all insane."

"Yeah well, you're sitting here next to me." Scott shot back.

"Like I had a choi—Wait! What about John and Virgil?!" Gordon started to unbuckle himself. "We have to get them back here!"

"Park it, Gordon!" Scott ordered. He sent the ship into a steep climb, causing Gordon to be pressed back into his seat. "Trust me when Virgil sees the safety cable drop, he'll know something's going on. Until then, sit down and shut up."

"You dropped the cable! Dammit, Scott!"

"I said shut up!" Scott clenched his jaw as the g-forces increased, sending lances of pain through his shoulder. He brought Thunderbird Two higher into the storm, then held her steady.

"So, just what does this plan of yours and Brains entail?" Gordon snapped.

"I have to get us struck by lightning."

"**WHAT?!** Are you out of your fucking mind?" Gordon grabbed the controls. "I'm taking over." He punched a button on the console.

"No, you're not." Scott hit the override. "Gordon, look, Brains knows what he's doing. You need to trust me."

"How do I know it's not some crazy plan cooked up by the Hood?!" Gordon shouted. "He could be screwing in your head too!!"

Scott looked over at his brother. Gordon's face was pale and his eyes were wide with fear. "Gordon, listen to me. It's OK. No one's taken over my mind, it's me, Scott."

"How do I know that for sure?!" Gordon's voice cracked with emotion.

Scott's tone softened. "Guppy, it's me."

Gordon visibly relaxed. "Scott..."

"Forget it, Gords. Let's just get this done so we can go back down." Scott turned his attention back to the ship.

"How long do you think this will take?" Gordon asked.

Scott shook his head. "I have no id—" His voice was cut off as a lightning bolt hit the ship and sent them into darkness.

* * *

John floundered in the water, trying to stay afloat as the waves crashed over him. He coughed and spluttered as he swallowed a mouthful of sea water. Gasping for breath he managed to snag a piece of debris floating by, and clung tightly to it. He glanced up towards the boat, watching as it settled deeper into the water. He could barely make out Virgil waving franticly from the deck.

Another wave washed over him, knocking the debris away. He fumbled at his uniform, tearing a strip away near his name patch. The green reflectors on his uniform suddenly lit up, sending strobes of flashing light all around him. _At least now they'll be able to find me,_ John thought to himself. He managed to hook his arms around another piece of wreckage which kept him at least partially above water.

A sudden roar caught his attention and he looked up. Thunderbird Two's retros had fired up, and the giant ship was turning away. "NO!" John yelled, swallowing another mouthful of water.

When he was able to breathe again, he watched in horror as Two disappeared upwards into the storm. He looked over at the boat and was unable to see Virgil. Fear slammed into him.

"_They left you, John."_

"N-No! They wouldn't do that!"

"_They left you to die."_

"They'll be back!"

"_You're all alone."_

Evil laughter echoed in John's head as Thunderbird Two's lights faded into the clouds. "NOOOO!!!!"

* * *

Virgil strained through the rain, trying to see his brother. A bright flash of light caught his eye and he stared at the spot until it flashed again. He let out a sigh of relief. _He's above water, thank God. Now to just figure out how to get him back up here! _Another wave knocked him to his knees, and he crawled over to brace his back against the helm house. _This is so not fun anymore..._Suddenly the pitch of Thunderbird Two's engines changed and his head snapped up. Sure enough, the retros were firing and the ship was shifting position. _What the..._Virgil watched in disbelief as the ship turned and within moments, disappeared into the clouds.

"Thunderbird Two come in!...Scott!...Brains!...Someone answer me!!" Virgil yelled franticly. There was no reply, not that Virgil had really expected one. He glanced upwards again, wincing at the lightning flashes. "Scott, you'd better have a _damn_ good reason for this."

Fermat's fingers flew across the keyboard. The lightning strike had done just what his father had suspected and erased the core programming of Thunderbird Two. The trouble was, Fermat had less than two minutes to reboot the system before the 'bird freefell beyond recovery. A faint sheen of sweat covered his forehead as he continued to work. A gasp next to him caused him to look up.

Tin-Tin's eyes were wide and she stared off into nothing. "T-Tin-Tin?" He ventured carefully.

She looked over at him. "It's my uncle. He's after John again."

Fermat went pale. "I th-th-thought you had gotten rid of him?"

"So did I. You take care of Thunderbird Two." She closed her eyes and clutched her crystal in her hand. "I'll take care of the Hood."

* * *

Scott gripped the yoke tightly as the ship started to fall. She started in a slow, lazy spin, and he fought to keep her nose up. Next to him, Gordon also pulled at the controls. "Whose bright idea was this anyway?" Gordon asked through clenched teeth.

"Brains." Scott replied, never taking his eyes from the windshield.

"Yeah well, if we survive this, remind me to kill him."

Scott grinned briefly then grew serious again. "How much more time do we have?"

"Fifty-eight seconds." Gordon answered.

"Terrific." Scott muttered. His shoulder throbbed with the strain of trying to control the huge ship. He gritted his teeth and held on as the 'bird continued its downward spiral.

Gordon glanced back down at his watch. "We're reaching the point of no return." Scott didn't answer. Gordon looked again. "Twelve seconds...Ten...Scott!" Scott ignored him and Gordon tried to suppress the panic rising in his chest.

Suddenly the cabin lights flickered a few times, then stayed on. "Activate computer navigation systems now!" Scott ordered.

"FAB!" Gordon quickly punched in a few commands and the ship wavered a moment, then steadied out. He sighed and shot a look at his brother. "Do me a favor, don't do that again."

"I agree." Scott replied, wiping the sweat from his forehead with his sleeve. "Try the communications."

Gordon turned quickly back to the panel. "Thunderbird Two to..."

"_What the hell is going on up there?!"_ Virgil's voice blasted across the speakers.

Gordon grinned. "I think it's safe to say communications are back online."

"_Somebody answer me! Where did you take my ship?"_

"Easy, Virg, we just fixed her." Gordon answered. "We're on our—"

"_Shut up and get down here! John's overboard."_

Gordon was instantly out of his seat and bolting towards the door as Scott angled the ship back on course towards the sinking ship.

* * *

Virgil kept looking from the green flash in the water to the sky above, trying to keep watch both on John and the return of Thunderbird Two. He'd already tried to raise John, but belatedly remembered his brother going overboard without his helmet.

The boat was sinking faster now; Virgil had had to scramble upwards to keep from going under himself. His arms gripped the rails as he climbed up higher onto the helm house.

A noise overhead made him look up and breathe a sigh of relief. A few moments later, Gordon slithered down the safety cable. "Hey there sailor, need a lift?"

Virgil merely scowled and reached his hand up to his brother. Gordon hauled him up and quickly fastened the spare safety vest on. "John's still out there!" Virgil pointed off in the distance.

Gordon followed Virgil's hand and stared off into the darkness until he saw a brief flash of green light. "I see him. Get up there, I'll bring him back." Gordon started pulling the safety cable, adjusting its length. Noticing Virgil hadn't moved, he gave his brother a small shove. "Go! Scott needs help up there! Get me as close to John as you can!" Without another word, Gordon dove off into the swirling water.

Virgil quickly retracted his own cable, and within moments was being pulled back aboard Thunderbird Two. Strong hands grabbed him and helped him down to the deck.

"Easy, Virgil."

Virgil looked up at Steve. "W-What's going on? W-Why did you g-guys l-leave?" He demanded, his teeth chattering with cold.

Steve wrapped a blanket around Virgil's shoulders and shook his head. "Scott'll have to fill you in. Where's Gordon and John?"

Virgil peered down the hatch. "Still down there. John got swept overboard by a wave and I lost sight of him. Gordon's gone after him." He looked up. "We have communications back?"

Steve nodded. "Whatever Brains had them do worked." He glanced back towards sick-bay. "I need to get back to Alan, and you better get up to Scott. He could probably use the help at this point."

Virgil sighed and shrugged the blanket off his shoulders. He could feel the beginning of a monumental headache starting as he pressed his communicator. "Scott?"

"_Virg? You alright? Where's John?"_

"He's still down there. Gordon's gone after him. Can you hold her for a few more minutes? I can't leave here yet."

There was a short pause. _"FAB, but try and hurry."_

Virgil could hear the strain in Scott's voice. "Working on it. John activated his flashers, can you track him that way?"

"_Hold on...Got him. Gordon still attached?"_

"As far as I know."

"_I'll see if I can raise him and move closer. Bridge out."_

Virgil pinched the bridge of his nose, then looked up. "Steve, I need you to help me get these people settled." He shook his head. "Wait, how's Alan?"

"Stable. He's knocked out on painkillers at the moment."

"Good. OK then, as soon as John and Gordon are back aboard, we'll head to the nearest hospital." Steve flinched. "What?"

He sighed. "Boston General is the closest one capable of handling this."

"Shit." Virgil scowled. "This just isn't our day." He sighed. "Well, we'll worry about that after we have everyone up here." He pressed his communicator again. "Gordon! What's your situation?"

* * *

John floundered in the water, clinging desperately to a piece of the boat's wreckage. He had already kicked his boots off in an attempt to keep his head above water, but the waves crashing over him were slowly weakening his grip.

"_Let go, John."_

"No!"

"_They aren't coming back for you. Why let yourself suffer like this?"_

"Please, stop." John nearly sobbed.

Hood's evil laughter rang through his head. _"Oh, John, why would I do that? When this is—"_

"_**Leave him alone!"**_

Tin-Tin's voice sounded in his mind. "Tin-Tin?"

"_**You're stronger than he is, John. Don't let him do this to you!"**_

"I-I can't..."

"_**You can!"**_

"_Ah, little niece, this is pointless. He belongs to me now."_

"_**He belongs to himself!"**_

The pain in John's head began to intensify and he groaned. "Please..."

"_**John! Stay with me. Fight him!"**_

"No...I can't..." John released his hold on the debris and let himself be swept away.

"_**JOHN!"**_

* * *

Tin-Tin faltered and grabbed the back of Fermat's chair for support. "You won't hurt him again!" She whispered vehemently.

"T-Tin-Tin?" Fermat questioned.

She didn't answer, but clutched her crystal even tighter. "Alan...Alan, hear me."

* * *

Alan's eyes fluttered open. "Tin-Tin?" He rasped.

"_**Alan! I need your help! John's in trouble!"**_

He forced the fog from his mind and struggled to sit up. "John? But where—"

"_**I don't have time to explain. I need you to hold Hood off so I can finish him."**_

Alan shook the last of the cobwebs from his head and forced himself into a sitting position. "What do you want me to do?"

"_**Remember how you fought against Hood's mind powers down in the tunnel? I want you to do that again. Think of yourself as a wall between John and Hood."**_

"OK." Alan took a deep breath and closed his eyes. _A wall, think of a wall..._

* * *

Gordon searched desperately for his brother, but the waves were too rough and he could no longer see the flashes from John's uniform. "I've lost him! Do you have anything?"

Virgil answered a heartbeat later. _"Negative. I can't see a thing."_

"Crap..." Gordon scanned the area again, not seeing anything. A brief flash caught his eye and he stared until he saw it again. "Got him!" He set off through the water, his powerful strokes cutting through the waves. He paused a moment to get his bearings, and spotted his brother a few yards in front of him. Gordon pushed forward, reaching John just as he began to sink. "NO!" Gordon dove, thanking God he had the sense to put on one of the diving helmets, and snagged the collar of John's uniform. Giving a heave, he pulled John close and together they broke the surface. "Pull me up! Now!!"

"_FAB!"_

Gordon felt the cable start to pull him upwards and grasped John tightly under the arms, wrapping his legs around John's. Within moments, they were being hauled aboard Thunderbird Two.

The hatch closed as Virgil pried Gordon's arms off John. "They're up! Get us out of here, Scott!"

"_FAB!"_

Steve pushed forward, his fingers pressing against John's neck, searching for a pulse. His eyes met Virgil's and he placed an oxygen mask over John's nose and mouth. "C'mon, man, breathe. Don't do this."

Suddenly John coughed violently and Steve turned him on his side. John let out a low moan. "No..."

Virgil gripped John's hand. "Fight it, Johnny. You can do it."

John thrashed his head back and forth, and Steve and Virgil held tightly to his arms, pinning him to the deck. "Alone...can't stop him..." Blood began pouring from John's nose.

"What the hell?" Steve muttered. "Gordon, go get the med-kit, move!"

Gordon bolted to his feet and rushed to the sick bay. He was startled to see Alan struggling to stand, his splinted leg twisted awkwardly. "Alan!"

Alan looked up, his blue eyes bright. "John, I need to get to John!"

Gordon shook his head. "No way, the only place you're going is back to bed." He started to ease Alan back down but Alan pushed his hands away.

"Hood's going to kill John! I can help stop him, but I need to get to John!!"

Seeing the determination in Alan's eyes, Gordon sighed in resignation. He grabbed the med-kit off the shelf then swung Alan's arm over his shoulder, half carrying, half dragging him out the door.

Both Steve and Virgil looked up in surprise as Gordon and Alan came into view. "Alan! You should be back in bed!" Virgil told him.

Alan shook his head. "I can't...have to help John." He was pale and spoke through clenched teeth.

"Dammit, Al!" Virgil pulled Alan down next to him.

Alan shook off his arm and placed his hands on John's head. He closed his eyes. "John, listen to me. He can't hurt you. I won't let him."

John's eyes fluttered open. "Alan?" He whispered hoarsely.

"Let me in, John." John's eyes closed and he relaxed in Steve's arms. "That's it."

Steve, Virgil and Gordon exchanged a glance. "What's going on?" Steve asked quietly.

Virgil shook his head. "I have no idea."

John gave another gasp of pain. "My head...God!...Make it stop! Please!" He begged.

"I'm...trying...Tin-Tin! Help me!" Alan whispered fiercely. Suddenly John went limp. At the same time Alan slumped forward into Virgil's arms.

Steve quickly checked John's pulse and let out a sigh of relief before turning to Alan. "They're alright. But I want them both back in sick-bay. And you," he turned to Virgil. "Get up there and relieve Scott."

Virgil nodded. "FAB." He got to his feet and rushed out the door.

Steve started to hoist John up, but Gordon stopped him. "I've got John. You take Alan."

Steve smiled. "No problem." He helped Gordon steady John in his arms then turned to pick up Alan.

The captain stepped forward. "Here, let me help you with him." Together they carried Alan to sick bay and laid him down.

"Thanks." Steve said to Captain Crane.

Crane smiled back. "None needed. Glad to have helped. You've got your hands full here. I'll keep the masses settled. Where are you taking us?"

"Boston, Mass General." Steve told him. "We should be there shortly."

"Great. Take care of them, I'll take care of the rest." Moments later he was gone.

Steve turned his attention back to Alan. "He's OK, just passed out." He moved over to John and pried his eyes open. "Pupils are responding. I think he'll be alright." As if on cue John flinched and his eyes fluttered. "John? Can you hear me?"

"Where...where am I?" He tried to sit up, but Steve pushed him back down. John clenched his eyes shut. "Damn, my head is killing me."

"Bet the hands don't feel much better." Steve gently took John's hands. "Cable burn?" John nodded. "Let me look. Hmmm..." He turned and grabbed some gauze out of his kit, quickly bandaging John's hands. "There, that ought to hold you until we get home. I have to go check on our heart attack victim. Gordon, keep an eye on him."

Gordon nodded as Steve hurried off to the other end of the room. He looked over at Alan, then down at John. John's eyes were open and he stared at the ceiling, not really seeing it. A lone tear trickled down his cheek. "Hey." Gordon called out softly.

John started and quickly wiped his face. "Hey." He replied hoarsely. He carefully eased himself up, putting his head in his hands.

"Want me to go get Steve? See if he can give you something?"

John shook his head slightly. "No. I'll be fine."

Both were silent for a few minutes.

"John?

"Gordon?"

They snickered. "You first." Gordon said.

John sighed. "Gords...It was Hood. In my head. He wanted to kill me this time." He took a shuddering breath. "He told me..." John's voice cracked and Gordon's forehead furrowed in concern. "He told me you left. That I was alone. I should just let myself drown, none of you would care." His voice broke.

"Dammit Johnny!" Gordon pulled him close as John broke down. John clutched at his brother, all his fears and pent up emotions finally breaking free. Steve hurried over, but Gordon shook his head and he went back to his patient.

Sooner than Gordon thought possible, John had cried himself out and pulled away. "Sorry." He mumbled.

"For what? For proving you aren't made of stone?" Gordon snorted. "It's about time you let loose, John. Besides it's no surprise you getting all weepy, you're the girly one out of all of us. Unless we count Virgil." He grinned.

John stared at him for a moment, then burst out laughing. "Thanks, Gords, I needed that."

"Anytime, Blondie. That's what I'm here for." Gordon's brown eyes twinkled in amusement. "Now, lay back down and chill. We're about to land in Boston and I don't think you want to be seen there."

"Yeah, you're right." John settled himself back down on the bed.

Gordon squeezed his hand then started for the door. He paused and turned back to his brother. "John?" John opened his eyes. "For the record, you'll never be alone. I'll always be there." And then he was gone.


	46. Chapter 46

OK, Gals...let's go for the heart attack...

Sorry all about the delay with this. Real life comes first, and believe me it's been a doozy. I'd much rather have been writing, trust me.

Thanks for all your patience and special thanks to those who helped me out! Grumpy, Lucy, Tikatu, Bluegrass...hugs!

Now, on with the show...

* * *

The police officer glanced up as he heard the whine of a jet engine over the sounds of the storm. He stared into the rain until he could make out a giant green shape moving towards him. "They're here!" He called into his radio. 

They watched as the ship hovered over Storrow Drive a moment, then lowered down to the road, crushing a pedestrian bridge in the process. As the ship settled, a hatch opened and a white clad, helmeted figure made its way down the ramp.

He marched over to the officers, then glanced over at the remains of the bridge. "Sorry about that, you can be sure we'll take care of it."

The officer nodded. "Not a problem, let's worry about your injured." He gestured behind him where raingear clad personnel were hurrying out from the hospital.

Virgil glanced back towards Thunderbird Two. "OK, we'll get them out, please keep everyone away from the ship. Especially the press."

"You got it." The policeman began issuing orders into his radio as Virgil hurried back inside the ship.

Gordon was helping Steve get the injured organized and Virgil was surprised to see John stagger out of the sick-bay. He quickly strode to his brother's side. "What do you think you're doing?" He demanded.

John looked up, his face pale, but a determined look in his eyes. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

"You should be in bed."

John sighed. "Look, Virg, it's just a headache. And the sooner we get these people out of here, the sooner I'll be able to get there."

Virgil gave up. "Fine, but stay out of sight. You, Steve and Scott are security risks."

John nodded. "FAB." He winked as Virgil rolled his eyes and headed back out into the bay.

It took nearly an hour, but soon everyone was out and being tended to. Steve was back at Alan's side, readying him for the long flight home. Scott was still up in the cockpit, and Virgil and Gordon were tying things up outside. John leaned against the bulkhead and sighed wearily. He closed his eyes, rubbing the bridge of his nose._ I just want this finished so I can go home. Wherever that may be..._

His thoughts were interrupted by a whimper. Opening his eyes, he listened again. A moment later, he heard a small sob. He walked over to the storage lockers where he found a small girl, curled up in a corner. Kneeling down, he spoke softly. "Hey there."

She looked up, her brown eyes streaming with tears. "I want my mommy."

"What's your name, honey?"

"Linda."

John smiled and held out his hand. "Well, Linda, let's go find your mom." The girl looked at him a moment, then placed her tiny hand in his. He stood up and they walked towards the ramp. He paused a moment to grab a rain poncho and throw it over himself, then scooped up Linda in his arms.

A loud peal of thunder startled them both and Linda pressed her face into John's shoulder. "I don't like thunder." She whispered.

"Neither do I, baby, neither do I." He pulled the poncho over her as well and stepped out into the storm. He spied a worker with a red cross on their back and hurried over. "I have one more here, she lost her parents; can you help her?"

The hospital worker looked up and John froze.

Blue eyes locked onto indigo for what seemed like eternity.

"Christa..." John began.

A sudden shout startled them both. "Linda! Oh, Linda!" A woman came rushing over, taking the girl out of John's arms. "Thank-you for finding her!" She clutched the child close.

John merely nodded as Christa smiled at the woman. "There, now let's get you both inside and have a look at you." They started towards the hospital. Halfway to the door, Christa turned back to look, but John had disappeared.

Virgil hit the controls and watched as the loading ramp closed. As soon as it was secured, Scott materialized next to him. "It's about time. I was going nuts up there."

Virgil took off his helmet and ran a hand through his hair. "Well, it was no picnic out here, let me tell you."

Gordon walked over to them. "I hate rain."

They all laughed. "You're starting to sound like John." Scott looked around. "Where is Blondie anyway?"

"Probably back in sick-bay. His head was really bothering him earlier." Virgil said as they walked in that direction.

Steve looked up from Alan's side as they entered. "He's doing fine. I gave him a sedative for the pain and he was complaining of a headache. I'd like him home as soon as possible so I can set that leg."

Virgil nodded. "We're heading there now. How's John?"

Steve looked puzzled. "I don't know; isn't he with you?"

"Shit." Scott turned and headed back into the bay, Virgil and Gordon at his heels.

"Scott, wait!" Virgil called out, hurrying after his brother.

Scott whirled, his face an angry mask. "You lost him! You know what he's been through tonight and you lost him!"

Virgil's eyes flashed. "I am not his keeper. Why was it my job to watch him? Who says he needed watching anyway?!"

Gordon stepped forward. "Hey, guys, I don't really think—"

Scott faced his younger brother. "That's just it, you don't! If you hadn't opened your big mouth in the first place, none of this would have happened!"

"Back off, Scott! Don't blame Gordon for John's screw up!" Virgil snarled.

"John's not screwed up!!" Scott bellowed.

Oh no?" Virgil shot back. "Hearing voices in your head is normal?"

Scott's fist shot out, solidly connecting to Virgil's jaw, sending the younger man sprawling. He was back on his feet in a heartbeat, launching himself at Scott. Gordon tried to step between them, and ended up with a fist to his gut for his trouble. He doubled over, dropping to his knees as he tried to catch his breath.

Suddenly, and arm snaked itself around Virgil's neck, pulling him off Scott. "Knock it off, all of you!" Steve shouted. "You've got two brothers needing help and you three are standing here arguing about whose fault it is? Let's just drop this pissing contest right now and start acting like adults."

The three of them silenced instantly and avoided looking at each other. Finally Scott spoke up. "You're right." He ran a hand over his head. "I'm betting John has gone back to the brownstone."

Virgil arched an eyebrow. "You don't think he'd..." His voice trailed off.

"I hope not." Scott sighed. "Look, I'll stay here and find him. You guys head home and take care of Alan. I'll call as soon as I know more."

Steve nodded. "I'll go secure Alan. See you soon, Scott. And have Rosie look at that shoulder." He made his way back to sick-bay.

Gordon merely scowled and marched off without saying a word. Virgil shook his head. "Thanks for leaving me alone with him. Yeah, you're right. Go find John. We'll let you know when we get home." He held out his hand and Scott grasped it firmly before pulling his brother into a hug.

"Fly safe, Gus." Scott told him.

"FAB. I'll distract them; you change and get out of here." He started towards the hatch, then turned. "Scott, tell John..."

Scott nodded. "I will. Talk to you soon."

* * *

Christa rang the bell, then pounded on the door. She glimpsed a movement out of the corner of her eye, and saw the edge of the curtain fall back into place. "I know you're in there, John! Open this door or I'll pound on it until you do!!" She continued to press the bell, ignoring the rain that still poured down out of the sky. 

She paused, trying to figure out another way in, when suddenly the door opened. "It's about time. Oh, it's you."

Scott nodded down at her, his expression stony. "Hello, Christa."

"Where is he?" She demanded without preamble.

"What do you care?"

Christa met his gaze fearlessly. "I want to see your brother."

"What if he doesn't want to see you?" Scott replied coldly.

"I really don't give a damn what he wants." She refused to back down. "Now are you going to get out of my way, or am I going to knock you down?"

Scott paused a moment, then stepped aside. "He's in his room." Christa pushed past him and rushed up the stairs. Scott watched her go, then heard the thump or her footsteps as she hit the second set of stairs. He shut the door, a sly smile on his face.

John looked in the mirror, a little shaken at his appearance. His eyes were red rimmed, with dark circles underneath, and his forehead was etched with pain wrinkles. The paleness of his hair matched that of his face and he sighed as he reached for the painkillers. Swallowing the pills dry, he rubbed at the bridge of his nose, as he walked out of the bathroom.

"Hello, John."

John froze, one hand clutching at the towel around his waist. Christa was seated on the window seat, her face oddly expressionless. Her gaze went from John to the wet IR jumpsuit on the floor. She got up and walked towards him, causing him to step back a few paces. She grabbed the sweatpants off the bed flung them at him. "Get dressed and downstairs. We need to talk." Without another word, she marched out the door.

John sat down on the bed and put his head in his hands. "Terrific, this is all I need." He stayed there for a few minutes, then feeling resigned to the situation, got dressed and made his way below. He paused a moment, then hearing voices coming from the kitchen, took a deep breath and walked inside.

Scott and Christa both looked up when he entered the room. Scott had his shirt off and Christa was obviously examining his shoulder. John frowned. "Scott? You all right?"

Scott nodded. "Yeah, the doc here says I'll live."

Christa snorted. "What I said was that there doesn't seem to be any new damage, but it looks like you over-strained it a bit. You need to have Rosie look at it to make sure."

"I'll call her first thing in the morning." Scott glanced up at the clock. "Well, later this morning anyway." He eyed John critically. "You OK? How's the hands?" He asked as he pulled on his shirt.

John nodded, still standing in the doorway. "I'm fine." He said quietly.

"I'll be the judge of that. Sit." Christa ordered. "And don't give me that look, either."

"Christa." Scott said warningly.

She looked over to where John was sitting down, and noticed him moving gingerly. Her expression softened as she walked over. "Let me see your hands." John held them up and she frowned. "These need to be cleaned."

"Steve did it on Thunderbird Two, but..."

"You need fresh dressings."

"I'll get the first aid kit." Scott practically ran from the room.

John watched him go and scowled. "Wimp." Christa laughed and he looked up at her. "I've missed that sound...and I've missed you."

"John..." She sighed.

"I know, I'm sorry." He shook his head and winced.

"Headache?"

"Yeah."

She tilted his head up to look into his eyes. "Hmm...Your pupils are a bit dilated. Did you hit your head?"

"Not on the outside."

Scott walked back in. "Found it." He frowned at his brother. "John?"

John pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'll be OK, Scott."

"Yeah, where have I heard that one before..." Scott muttered.

Christa sat down and began cleaning the wounds on John's hands. John didn't say much except to wince occasionally. She finished up and was placing the bandage on his palm when John's sleeve slid back. She grabbed his wrist and eyed the slash there, then looked up at him, confusion in her eyes. "What's this?"

"It's nothing." Scott said, stepping in.

"Like hell it's nothing!" Christa whirled on John. "What, John, the drinking wasn't enough; you had to slit your wrists too?"

"Christa, that's enough. You have no idea what he's been through." Scott growled, his eyes flashing dangerously.

"Oh please, suicide is the coward's way out of dealing with things!" She shouted back.

"You have no right to judge him!"

"Stop defending him!"

The two of them continued bickering, neither noticing when John got up and left the room. They found him a short while later, staring out the window in the living room, not even flinching at the thunder and lightning that crashed overhead. "John?" Scott called out tentatively.

"Are you two finished?" John asked quietly, not turning around.

"John—" Scott began.

"No." John turned. "I want to talk to both of you, and I don't want any interruptions. No fighting, no comments, nothing until I've finished. Is that understood?" Both nodded. "Good, sit down."

Scott raised an eyebrow at his younger brother's tone, _and they say __**I**__ sound like Dad, _but he didn't say anything as he sat down on the couch. Christa sat down in a chair and both waited for John to begin.

John turned back to the window, arms folded in front of him. He was silent for a long time. Scott and Christa exchanged glances and Scott was about to say something when John finally spoke.

"Christa, as you've probably figured out by now, my family and I run International Rescue." He took a deep breath. "Tonight's rescue was perfect proof of why I should no longer be a part of it."

"John..."

"Shut up, Scott." John turned to face them. "We have five ships. Scott flies the rocket, Thunderbird One. Thunderbird Two is Virgil's baby. Gordon mostly takes Thunderbird Three, but loves his little sub, Thunderbird Four. I man...manned the space station, Thunderbird Five."

"A space station?" Christa asked.

John nodded. "I spend six weeks up, two weeks down."

She frowned. "That doesn't seem right."

"It's not."

Scott shook his head. "John, Dad's changing that; he has a new rotation schedule all figured out."

"I told you to shut up." John paced the room. He paused briefly in front of the bar, then moved on. "Christa, what do you know about a person named the Hood?"

She frowned again. "Not much...wait, wasn't he that guy who tried to rob the Bank of England a few months ago? Then he escaped and the Thunderbirds...Oh my God..." Her voice trailed off and she went pale. "You. You were the ones he attacked." She turned to Scott. "And your shoulder, I _knew_ those scars didn't match the injury." She faced John again. "Tell me what happened."

"I've told you some of it. Just changed the venue for it."

"You said your lab was attacked."

"It was. Only my...lab, was Thunderbird Five." John took a shuddering breath. "He launched a missile at it, intending to disable it enough to get my family up there. Then he planned to finish us off."

"But, why?"

John clenched his eyes shut. "About five years ago, there was a mine collapse in Indonesia. It was our first rescue. Myself, Scott, Dad and Virgil went in to help. We managed to get nearly two-thirds of the victims out before the mine fully collapsed."

Scott shook his head. "We learned the hard way, that sometimes, you just can't save them all. No matter how hard you try or how much you want to."

"I know. Believe me, I know." Christa said softly.

John nodded. "Trangh Belagant, or Hood as he prefers to be called, owned the mine. He was one of the ones trapped in the final collapse. He blames us, my father especially for leaving him."

Christa snorted. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. From what I remember, he was the one skimping on safety protocols in the first place."

Scott nodded. "Yeah, but try convincing a madman of that." He glanced up at his brother, his grey eyes dark with concern.

John had turned back to the window. "So, he got his revenge. He figured out how to locate the station and get my family up there. Alan stayed on the planet and somehow managed to stop Hood. That's how I got hurt. The broken ribs, the burns...it happened during the initial attack."

"And the chest tube?" Christa asked. "That was only a few weeks ago."

"There's more. Hood was the one who kidnapped my team member. Only it was my brother, Alan. We, my brothers and I went after him. That's when Scott got shot, and I got beat up by one of Hood's thugs. We got out with Alan, more or less in one piece." John's tone was eerily expressionless. "I died that day. Twice my heart stopped and Virgil was able to get it started again. He called Steve MacLeod and brought him to the island. Steve and Virgil saved my life." He grew quiet again. "I wanted Hood to die for what he did to me and my family. I tried to shoot him but...he has these...powers. He can get inside your head; make you do things, feel things, that aren't necessarily true."

He paced the room again. "For the past six months, he's been doing that to me. Talking to me in my mind. I'm not saying he's wholly responsible for my behavior, but he nudged me into some of it." He stopped and looked at Scott. "And you were right. I didn't always try to stop him."

John sat down on a chair and put his head in his hands. "I felt alone. He was there and stuff he said made sense."

Christa got up and knelt in front of him, pulling his hands from his face. "I told you once I'd never leave you alone."

"But I drove you away." John's eyes grew haunted. "He threatened to kill you. He tried that night, when I pushed you. It was, but wasn't me. He said he could help me if only I would let him. Instead..." John pulled his hands away and got to his feet again. "Then when I tried to fight back, he went after me directly." He held out his wrist. "I'm too much of a wimp to do it this way. I'd overdose or something simple like that. Hell, I could have walked out of the airlock anytime I wanted."

Now it was Scott's turn to go pale. "John, please don't tell me you ever actually considered that." John's silence was answer enough. Scott bolted to his feet, his fists clenched at his sides. "Dammit! I told Dad you needed to be Earth-side more!"

"Scott, don't." John waited until his brother looked over at him. "Don't pin this on Dad. This goes way beyond the Hood. I should have told him, long ago, how I felt." He shook his head. "I should have told all of you."

Scott walked over and placed his hands on John's shoulders. "John, no more secrets."

John nodded. "No more secrets."

Christa spoke up. "Wait, how did this Hood guy do all this? Mind control?"

John nodded. "I've been doing some research. It seems that if you have the desire and the discipline, you can be...telepathic for lack of a better term. Some people just have a natural ability, like Tin-Tin and Alan."

"Alan?" Scott sounded incredulous.

John nodded. "Alan. He's held Hood back twice for me."

Scott shook his head. "Wow...Alan, who'd have thought."

"We all tend to overlook him. Maybe it's time we stopped." John said quietly. He brought his hand up to his temple and rubbed it, grimacing.

Christa stepped forward. "Well I think it's time for both of you to get some rest. It's been a hell of a night all around. And for the record, you're both going to get looked at tomorrow. No arguments." She added at Scott's look.

John nodded. "Yeah, I think I'll hit the sack. Thanks for listening, Scott."

Scott smiled. "You didn't exactly give me a choice there, Blondie." He squeezed John's shoulders. "Try and get some sleep."

John merely nodded and after a quick glance at Christa, walked out of the room.

"Are you staying?" Scott asked her.

Christa nodded. "For now."

"He was lost without you." Scott spoke simply.

Christa wrapped her arms around herself. "I was lost without him." She looked up. "But I can't watch him kill himself. I love him too much."

Scott nodded. "He hasn't touched a drop since after you left. It wasn't easy, but he's trying. And now that we've hopefully got that bastard out of his head..."

"I can't promise anything, Scott." She told him.

"I know. Tonight changed him, Christa. He'll never admit it, but he needs you. We all do." Scott took her hands. "Please, stay."


	47. Chapter 47

As usual, I don't own the Thunderbirds or their characters, just the ones I made up! Enjoy!

* * *

Jeff slowly opened the door and peered into the room. It was late and the room was dark, the only light coming from a small lamp near John's bed. He crept over and stared down at his son. _He looks so peaceful. God, John, I almost lost you...again._ He brushed a lock of hair off of John's forehead. John mumbled something and Jeff stepped back, hoping not to wake him.

"He won't wake up."

Jeff turned, startled, to see Christa curled up on the window seat. She shrugged the blanket off her lap and padded over to him, also glancing at John. "He's been trying to sleep for the past two days. But he keeps having horrible nightmares. Tonight, I gave him something that would help."

Jeff arched an eyebrow. "And he took it?"

"He asked me for it." She nodded towards the door and together they made their way downstairs to the kitchen. "Would you like a cup of coffee?"

"I'd love one, thanks, Christa." Jeff sat down at the table and waited until she had poured two mugs and joined him. "How is John, other than the nightmares?"

"I think he'll be all right in time. I'm trying to get him to realize that he needs to talk to someone about this."

Jeff smiled. "If you can convince him of that, I'll give you whatever new equipment you think your department needs."

"It's a deal."

"Good. How's Scott?"

"He's fine. I had Rosie look over his shoulder, but it seems that he just over strained it. He's back in a sling for about a week, then starts the physical therapy again."

Jeff nodded. "Good. Finished?" He took their cups and put them in the sink.

"Mr. T?" Jeff turned. "How do you do it? What you do. How do you get up every day knowing today might be the day one of them could get killed?"

Jeff sat back down. "I don't let myself think like that, Christa. None of us do. The thought is always there, in the back of our minds, but we can't dwell on what _might _happen."

She nodded. "I see. Sort of like what I do. You can't let yourself become personally involved or you'd go insane."

"Exactly." They were silent a few minutes. "You know, Christa, there's room on our team for you. I know John wouldn't mind you coming back with us."

Christa looked up, her indigo eyes wide. "Sir, I hate to be the one to tell you this but...I don't think John's going back."

* * *

John leaned on the balcony, looking out over the park. His mind was blissfully quiet of everything but his own thoughts. Even the constant headache he'd always seemed to have had disappeared. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, just reveling in the peace.

"John?"

John sighed and dropped his chin to his chest. _So much for peace._ He plastered a smile on his face and turned to his father, "Hey, Dad."

"Not bothering you, am I?" Jeff asked.

"Not at all."

Jeff smiled. "Liar." John didn't reply but turned back around. Jeff walked over to stand next to him. "So, son, how are you feeling?"

"I am so tired of people asking me that." John said, a touch of venom in his voice.

Jeff looked up at his son's tone, a frown creasing his forehead. "John?"

John pushed himself away from the railing. "All anyone's done for the past six months is hover around me. I just need some space!"

"Space? You left and came here, alone. How much more space do you need?" A touch of anger entered Jeff's voice. "You're the one claiming we've all ignored you and now you want me to leave you alone? Make up your mind, John!" Jeff took a deep breath, "Son, I've been patient, trying to leave you to sort things out on your own, but—"

"But what, Dad?! You're here now! Virgil's been calling three times a day; Scott won't let me out of his sight; Christa's constantly checking my vitals and now you show up on the doorstep...Dammit! I wish you would all just leave me alone!" He stalked to the end of the patio and threw himself down in a chair, putting his head in his hands. "God, I need a drink."

Jeff stood at the other end of the patio, his arms folded across his chest. John obviously had something to say, and Jeff was going to wait and let him make the first move. Finally John looked up. "I'm sorry." He said softly.

Now Jeff walked over to sit next to his son. "Want to explain to me what that little outburst was all about?"

John ran a hand through his hair. "I feel like I'm being torn apart. Everyone is trying to help, trying to do what's best for me." He looked up at his father, anguish plainly visible in his eyes. "Dad, how can you all help me when I don't know what I need?"

Jeff's tone softened. "I think you need to talk to someone, son. Some one who** can **help you."

John nodded. "I've been searching our database and found an agent in New York who just happens to be a psychiatrist."

"I know." Jeff leaned back in his chair. "I've been talking to him too." At his son's shocked expression, Jeff raised an eyebrow. "Do you think you're the only one who's having trouble handling this situation?"

"I guess I never thought about it."

"Now who's being self centered?" Jeff shook his head. "We all have a lot to deal with, John. And some of us aren't dealing with it at all."

John got up and paced the length of the patio. "Dad, I...I don't think I can go back to Five," he said quietly.

"You will in time."

John shook his head. "I don't think I want to."

"John..." Jeff started.

"No, Dad. I can't. I just can't do this anymore." His voice grew quiet. "I'm not returning to the island, either."

Jeff sighed. "I know."

John looked over at his father. "You aren't mad?"

Jeff got up and walked over to stand next to his son. "Why would I be mad? I told you months ago that it was your decision. I won't go back on my word now." He stole a glance at his son. "So, does Christa play a part in this plan of yours?"

John shrugged. "I hope so. I love her, Dad."

"I know you do. But John, sometimes love just isn't enough. A relationship takes work, John. But more importantly, it takes trust."

John nodded. "And I have to earn hers back, if I can."

"It's not going to be easy, son. You hurt her by your lies."

_Pushing her down the steps probably didn't help either, _John mused as he looked out over the Common.

"John, I want you to have this." His father's voice interrupted John's thoughts. He looked over at Jeff, who handed him a small box. "I was going to give this to you before I left, but the time just didn't seem right."

"What is it?"

"Open it and see."

Puzzled, John opened the box. He gasped when he saw what was inside. "Dad..." The velvet lined box held a beautiful antique ring. The metal was silver in color and held a deep blue sapphire, surrounded by tiny diamonds.

Jeff smiled. "It belonged to your great-great-grandmother. It's been passed down in my family for generations."

John shook his head. "I don't remember Mom wearing this."

"That's because her mother gave me a ring that had been passed down on her side of the family. Your mother and I decided that we would save this one for when we had children of our own."

John stared down at the ring, then shut the box and handed it back to his father. "I can't take this. By rights, it belongs to Scott."

"It belongs to whoever I say it does, and I'm giving it to you," Jeff replied, pushing the box back into John's hands. "John, you love her, and deep down, I know she still loves you." John's head snapped up, his blue eyes going wide. "It's no secret son; it shows whenever one of you looks at each other, even now."

John looked back down at the ring, then snapped the box shut. "Thanks, Dad. I don't know if I'll get to use it...I don't really think I'm ready for marriage."

Jeff smiled. "I would be surprised and concerned if you were. But keep it anyway. You never know what might happen." He was quiet a few moments. "You can't go on like this, son. Hiding inside yourself. You'll only explode. Trust me."

John sighed and nodded wearily. "I'm starting to realize that." He looked up. "Are you really talking to a shrink?" Jeff nodded. "Well, then I guess if you can do it, I can too."

"That's my boy." Jeff clasped a hand on John's shoulder. "Now, about the island..."

John pulled away. "I can't, Dad, I just can't." He stared out over the Common again. "Remember the time Virgil was going to all the estate sales and buying up china plates? We all thought he was nuts. We thought so even more when he started smashing them. But then he took the shards and made that huge mosaic." He faced his father again. "That's my life, Dad. It's been shattered and broken, but I'm picking up the pieces and trying to put it together again. It's not the same as it was, but I'm working on making it something worth living."

Jeff nodded slowly. "I understand."

"You do?"

"I do. I want you to be happy, no matter where you are or what you're doing. But, John, I also want you to know that, if and when you feel the need to come home, you are always welcome."

John smiled, feeling a giant weight lift from his shoulders. "Thanks, Dad."

"But, son? Please, take care of yourself. And don't be a stranger."

"I won't."

Now Jeff smiled. He pulled his son into a hug. "I love you, John," he said hoarsely.

John let himself relax in his father's arms. "I love you too, Dad."

* * *

John waited outside of the hospital, waiting for Christa to appear. Finally he saw her walking out the door with a co-worker. He took a deep breath, and squaring his shoulders, walked over to them. "Hello, Christa."

She looked up in surprise. "John! What are you doing here? Is everything all right?"

He nodded. "Fine. I just...I was...Look, can I talk to you for a few minutes?"

Christa paused a moment, and her friend stepped forward. "I don't think that's a good idea," she said coldly.

Christa shook her head. "No, Marla, it's OK."

Marla still looked doubtful. "You sure?" Christa nodded. "Well..." She turned back to John and poked a finger into his chest. "I'll tell you this, buddy. You lay a finger on her and you deal with me, got it?"

John nodded. "Got it."

Marla shot him one last glare and turned back to Christa. "You call me as soon as you get home."

She nodded. "I will." Without another word, Marla marched off. Christa shrugged up at John. "She's a bit over protective."

"That's OK. She has reason to be. I got these for you." John handed her the flowers and smiled. The smile didn't quite reach his eyes however.

"Thank-you." She breathed in the scent of the pink roses. "Romance was something you never had trouble with, John."

He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "No, it was just everything else." He looked up at the shattered pedestrian bridge. "Dad wired money to the city," he said quietly. "It shouldn't be too long until it's fixed." They continued down the street in silence, crossing when they reached the next bridge and making their way along the river.

After the silence had gone on too long, Christa stopped. "Well, what did you want to talk about?"

John ran his hand through his hair. "I'm not sure where to start." He sat down on a bench.

After a moment, Christa sat down next to him. "How about at the beginning?"

He sighed. "I'm sorry. I know that doesn't begin to cover things, but I am." He got up and paced nervously. "Once things started getting serious, I should have told you about me...about my family. Hell, Dad even told me to say something."

"Then why didn't you?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. Fear, I guess." He looked out over the Cambridge skyline. "I had...had alot going on in my head. For a while I thought that if I just ignored everything going on around me, things would settle back to normal."

"Yeah, that worked real well now, didn't it?" Christa said sarcastically.

John shot her a look. "I'm trying to apologize here."

She sat back and folded her arms across her chest. "Please, go on."

He took a deep breath, steadying himself. "As I was saying, I was a jerk. I wish I could blame all this on what happened, but I can't. No one forced drinks down my throat; no one threw me off the island. I should have gotten help when this whole thing went down." He sat down heavily. "The one thing I regret is what I did to you," he said quietly. "You were the last person I wanted to hurt, yet the one I hurt the most."

Christa followed his gaze out over the Charles. "You did hurt me, John. Both mentally and physically." She turned to look at him. "Yet, I find myself still caring for you. I must be insane."

Hope swelled in John's chest. "Christa..."

She shook her head. "I never felt for anyone the way I felt...feel for you. But I can't do it, John. I can't open myself up like that again. I won't." She got to her feet.

John grabbed her arm. "Wait...Please, Christa. I made mistakes, I'll probably still make more, but please, give me another chance." When she still hesitated, he took her face in his hands. "You've seen me at my worst, now give me a chance to show you my best."

Her indigo eyes filled with tears. "John..."

"Christa, I love you."

* * *

_A few days later..._

John walked with his father and brother through the airport to a private terminal. Scott looked out the window at the jet sitting there on the tarmac. "One of ours?" he asked his father. Jeff nodded. "Nice. We'll get home in half the time."

"We'll be landing in Hawaii for a refuel, then I'll gauge how we feel and whether we continue or stop for the night." Jeff told him.

Scott nodded. "Works for me. Hawaii huh?" He shot a cocky grin at his brother. "Maybe I'll get 'lei-ed'."

John and Jeff both groaned. "Scott, that was awful." John shook his head. "How can we be related?"

"Beats the hell out of me." He pulled John into a one armed hug. "Take care of yourself, Blondie."

"You too, Scott." John clung to him for a moment, then pulled away. "Scott, I..."

"Don't, John." He pulled him close again. "Call if you need anything."

"I will."

With one last smile at his brother, Scott walked out the door and down to the plane. Jeff turned to his son. "You're really going to leave me alone in a plane with him for twelve hours?"

John grinned. "I give you forty-five minutes before he's convinced you he's OK to fly."

Jeff shook his head. "No bet. And he's not flying."

John grinned. _Sure he's not._ "Call me when you land."

"I will." Jeff paused. "Did you talk to Christa?" John nodded. "And?"

John sighed. "We're taking it slow. She's not moving back into the brownstone, but staying at her place. We're going to start over, see what happens."

"Good." Jeff looked closely at his second son. John was still pale and thin, but the circles were fading from under his eyes, and he held himself with more assurance than Jeff had seen in a long time. "We'll see you at the prize ceremony, if not before."

John nodded. "You're sure Alan won't be going back to Wharton?"

"No. He'll need recovery time for his leg then we'll home-school him and Fermat along with Tin-Tin. The three of them are serious about being part of the team...it's time I listened to them."

"They won't let you down, Dad."

Jeff caught the edge in John's voice. "And neither will you." He pulled John into a hug. "Don't stay away too long. I expect to hear from you on a regular basis."

"FAB." John grinned slyly. "And I want to hear all about you and Penny."

Jeff flushed. "How did you..."

"I have my sources." John smiled. "Thanks, Dad."

"Take care of yourself, son." With one last hug, Jeff followed his eldest down to the plane. John watched as it taxied onto the runway and was soon taking off. He waited until it had vanished into the clouds, then turned and walked out the door, heading towards Christa, and home.

FINIS

* * *

Well, Gang, it's finally over...and what a ride it's been. I want to thank all my readers and reviewers for all your support and patience with me on this story. Real life certainly has a way of getting in the way of fantasy sometimes.

I also want to give a HUGE Thank-you to everyone who helped me out with this. Bluegrass, Convert, Grumpy, Tikatu, Agent Five and Agent "Harely" (my own two Dr. Vickers), my hubby and my kids...I never would have been able to do this without you. Thanks doesn't begin to cover it.

So, will there be more to this saga? I guess you'll have to stay tuned to find out!


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